Just another day of trying to figure out The purpose of a public method with zero documentation and cryptic variable names🙇🏼🙇🏼🙇🏼

function doChangeDatabaseUpdate34s() {
updateAndNotifyTheDatabaseForChange45();
}

... what do you mean, my code is self documenting!!

function doIt() {
doRun(false);
}

Job security is the meaning of that function

@fergyMC thats genius! Just slowly infect some huge project with code, huge fundamentally design choices which culminate in me being the only one to understand the convoluted abstraction out outdated. Forge some 2 year old git commits to gitblame others who oppose me to prevent suspicion... every once in a while introduce a logicfucking bug that only I, after much hard work am able to fix... I'd be unfireable, without me their entire business crumbles. muhahahah

Imagine... A LAMP server records logs, uses unsecure FTP to write logs as a cvs file no windows 98 box. From there the file is opened over LDAP by another computer on localnet. This one runs vista service pack 1 btw. data gets turned into into XML by a .net script that immediately dumps 4gb of log into memory because logs are NEVER rotated so no data gets lost ;) then the xml gets inserted into MSAccess by a multithread java app that crashes all the damn time and hasn't been touched since 2003.

the terrifying thing is, that most certainly exists out there somewhere