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So a friend of Mine asked me to check their Mail server because some emails got lost. Or had a funny signature.
Mails were sent from outlook so ok let's do this.
I go create a dummy account, and send/receive a few emails. All were coming in except one and some had a link appended. The link was randomly generated and was always some kind of referral.
Ok this this let's check the Mail Server.
Nothing.
Let's check the mail header. Nothing.
Face -> wall
Fml I want to cry.
Now I want to search for a pattern and write a script which sends a bunch of mails on my laptop.
Fuck this : no WLAN and no LAN Ports available. Fine let's hotspot the phone and send a few fucking mails.
Guess what? Fucking cockmagic, no funny mails appear!
At that moment I went out and was like chainsmoking 5 cigarettes.
BAM!
It hit me! A feeling like a unicorn vomiting rainbows all over my face.
I go check their firewall. Shit redirected all email ports from within the network to another server.
Yay nobody got credentials because nobody new it existed. Damn boy.
Hook on to the hostmachine power down the vm, start and hack yourself a root account before shit boots. Luckily I just forgot the credentials to a testvm some time ago so I know that shit. Lesson learned: fucking learn from your mistakes, might be useful sometimes!
Ok fucker what in the world are you doing.
Do some terminal magic and see that it listens on the email ports.
Holy cockriders of the galaxy.
Turns out their former it guy made a script which caught all mails from the server and injected all kind of bullshit and then sent them to real Webserver. And the reason why some mails weren't received was said guy was too dumb to implement Unicode and some mails just broke his script.
That fucker even implented an API to pull all those bullshit refs.
I know your name "Matthias" and I know where you live and what you've done... And to fuck you back for that misery I took your accounts and since you used the same fucking password for everything I took your mail, Facebook and steam account too.
Git gut shithead! You better get a lawyer15 -
A "support" guy my boss got in. I had told my boss numerous times, "Get rid of this guy, he's only wasting our time and money. And he's going to end up doing something where we will end up having to put out the fires."
Sure as a pair of nuts on a squirrel, this crazy bastard goes and DELETES a client's database. Yes folks, in fucking production. A live database. The heart of the business' transactions are... *poof*... GONE!!!
No backups for the day! No synchronisation beforehand! No nothing... just GONE!!! Fucking flat-lining!
Well, when I realised what he has done, I had to remove myself from the room before shit got outta hand!
I told the boss man that is the last straw and he needs to go...
The long and short of it...
- The client had luckily only lost about half a days data.
- I'm no longer at the company.
- This dumb fuck still is.
18 -
Fuck you fucking piece of self taught shit. Self taught my ass you dont even know how to use git or how to use modern IDE. You dont even know how to use debugger. You dont read other peoples code because you are an arrogant kid who thinks that everybody elses code is trash. Yet after couple days when you need to work on your own code you usually rewrite entire fucking thing because of how fucked up your spaghetti implementations are. Even worse you dont even know fucking english so documentation is useless to you unless I dumb down everything for you and spoon feed you like a 5 year old. Motherfucker you cant even stick to a proper work schedule, you go to sleep at 7am and wake up at 18.00 and I have to fucking work overtime because Im blocked by your spaghetti code. Fuck you fucking self taught arrogant piece of shit who never ever worked as a dev profesionally yet you have the nerve to feel cocky.28
-
Client: why hasnt anything been done for the new site?
Me: because you never paid for the last one thats been put into production
Client: yeah but that was a smaller simple site. I need this one up and done already
Me: it'll be worked on when I get paid for my previously worked time for you.
Client: but that was a month ago. I don't understand why you are asking for payment now
Me: because you never paid me for last months work!!
Client: but its may now
Me: holy shit, -clients name-, I know very well what month it is and dont need a lesson. I also know better than to work for free. I have bills to pay just like you and everyone else so until you have paid the last invoice, I'm not lifting a finger for you. That includes answering your calls
Client: oh well why didnt you just say that to begin with
Motherfucking fuck people are horrid and dumb and make me violent6 -
Lead dev walks in:
"Remember what I said about doing dumb shit solutions in languages that no one understands?"
Me: "Yes.....why?"
Him: "That reporting script you did for <x department> needs some modifications and you decided for whatever fucking obscure reason to do it in perl"
Me: "I felt......experimental"
Him: "Well yes, that is cool and all but it needs some modifications as per <X director> and only your dumbass knows perl because you are just too fucking cute aren't ya?"
Me: "You think I am cute??? <insert spongebob blushing meme>"
Him: "I fucking hate it when you write shit in perl"
In my defense, it was a really short fucking script
For clarification: This was a friendly convo even though it doesn't sound like it. He is actually my employee, and a rather close friend, so there is that level of trust and comraderie29 -
Sometime around 2010 a colleague asked me to join him in developing mining rigs for some shit called “bitcoin”. I thought it was dumb as hell.
He’s a millionaire now.2 -
PM finds my prized stress ball and draws a face on it. When asked why she said "it looked depressed".
THATS THE LOGO YOU DUMB BITCH. PLEASE DON'T TOUCH MY SHIT
On the bright side... Good thing I have this stress ball to relieve my anger 😒
16 -
I... uhm... I... I can't... I ... I can't even.... THIS IS LIVE IN THE CLIENT'S SITE WHERE ANYONE CAN CREATE A LOGIN WITH NO VERIFICATION WHATSOEVER AND SEE THIS WHICH IS LINKED TO A BIG RED BUTTON THAT RESETS THE WHOLE DATABASE, YOU FUCKING DUMB PIECE OF SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
// This event clears the entire solution in all active clients, truncates the database and also removes any stored PDFs in the server folder
$(document).on('click', '#resetDB', function () {
// This event only happens if the user correctly enters the password, this is to prevent other users than the admin from performing this action
var answer = prompt("Please enter the password required to perform this action.");
if(answer == "-REDACTEDBECAUSEHOLYSHIT-") {
socket.emit('resetDB');
} else {
alert("The password is incorrect, please try again!");
}
});
AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!111!!1!!11!1!!1!1one!one!!!11
(I'm not inventing this, even though the "site" is internal only and not accessible through the web. That does *not* make it any less stupid!)
11 -
It seems like every other day I run into some post/tweet/article about people whining about having the imposter syndrome. It seems like no other profession (except maybe acting) is filled with people like this.
Well lemme answer that question for you lot.
YES YOU ARE A BLOODY IMPOSTER.
There. I said it. BUT.
Know that you're already a step up from those clowns that talk a lot but say nothing of substance.
You're better than the rockstar dev that "understands" the entire codebase because s/he is the freaking moron that created that convoluted nonsensical pile of shit in the first place.
You're better than that person who thinks knowing nothing is fine. It's just a job and a pay cheque.
The main question is, what the flying fuck are you going to do about being an imposter? Whine about it on twtr/fb/medium? HOW ABOUT YOU GO LEARN SOMETHING BEYOND FRAMEWORKS OR MAKING DUMB CRUD WEBSITES WITH COLOR CHANGING BUTTONS.
Computers are hard. Did you expect to spend 1 year studying random things and waltz into the field as a fucking expert? FUCK YOU. How about you let a "doctor" who taught himself medicine for 1 year do your open heart surgery?
Learn how a godamn computer actually works. Do you expect your doctors and surgeons to be ignorant of how the body works? If you aspire to be a professional WHY THE FUCK DO YOU STAY AT THE SURFACE.
Go learn about Compilers, complete projects with low level languages like C / Rust (protip: stay away from C++, Java doesn't count), read up on CPU architecture, to name a few topics.
Then, after learning how your computers work, you can start learning functional programming and appreciate the tradeoffs it makes. Or go learn AI/ML/DS. But preferably not before.
Basically, it's fine if you were never formally taught. Get yourself schooled, quit bitching, and be patient. It's ok to be stupid, but it's not ok to stay stupid forever.
/rant16 -
I was at Leeds Central train station the other day, waiting for the platform to be announced on the screen in the main bit. I noticed a commotion to my right. There was a teenage girl screaming and writhing around on the floor, her mother was knelt on one knee trying to calm her. I walked over without thinking, I know nothing about Epilepsy or first aid, at a push I could probably figure out the recovery position from a faint diagram i have stored in the unused part if my brain...
(it’s where I keep the washing machine instructions, which incidentally were designed for maximum confusion, if Id designed a washing machine it would have 1 button labelled ‘wash’)...
Sorry, back to the story. So i walked over and just before I got there, with the mother looking directly at me, I realised, what the fuck am I doing, meanwhile the daughter was screaming still and writhing, a bit like a rapid angel print you would make in the snow as a kid (until your hand touched the dog shit).
I couldn’t help it, the words just came out, like a dumb fucker, i said ‘Has she got epilepsy?’ , i stood there waiting for the sarcastic comment or the murderous stare, even a fuck off would suffice, so that I could remove myself from the situation.
To my surprise, and shock, she looked at me, calmly and said “oh no, it’s not epilepsy or anything like that.... she’s lost her iPhone”.5 -
Just going to come out and say it.
If you wait until 4pm on a Friday to hit me up to fix your problems, you're a fucking gangrene twat.
I won't be taking care of your shit until Tuesday you dumb bitch.4 -
Disabling pasting into a password field in 2020 with password managers, is retarded. That's it that's the rant. Doesn't matter if you think password managers are good or not. Its still retarded that there's a 40 something year old dumbfuck manager who told a web designer at EA to disable pasting into a fucking password field because he was dumb enough to think it stopped hackers or some shit like that.15
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!rant
This dumb pretentious bitch.
We are both computer science students, she is writing her bachelor thesis, I'm in 4th semester, but have 6 years of professional programming experience.
So naturally when she had a problem implementing the MOTHERFUCKING PREPARING SOFTWARE, which she needs to begin writing her thesis I helped her.
First I started explaining every last bit of code, trying to teach her something, so that she wouldn't need my help ALL the time.
After a while I realised that this BLOODY GIRL FROM HELL acquired nearly half her credits by other peoples help, so I just fix the code hoping it would be over soon.
When that software was done, keep in mind, I coded nearly 90 FUCKING PERCENT OF THAT SHITTY ASS PIECE OF CRAP SOFTWARE, she asked me to also "help" her implementing a generator for samples she could test the software with.
Naturally at this point I said I'd be busy with own projects etc. And declined.
So now, nearly 1 Month after she didn't talk to me, THAT ARROGANT PIECE OF SHIT WANNABE SCIENCE BACHELOR asked if I could help her with LaTEX.
At first I was speechless. How could she have that amount of balls, asking me that. As I only am a ranting asshole inside, I declined in the most polite way.
WHAT THE FUCK! I HOPE YOU WILL FAIL YOUR THESIS AND ALL THE 12 SEMESTERS YOU STUDIED WILL HAVE BEEN FOR NOTHING, THUS SENDING YOU TO LIVE ON THE STREET WITHOUT MONEY AND DIE A HORRIBLE AND LONELY DEATH SURROUNDED BY BEGGERS TRYING TO STEAL YOUR KIDNEYS!
Sincerely,
Me.14 -
Ok you fucks that don't believe in documentation - me included.
Document your shit, because one day, one day some dumb fuck is going to have to recreate your over engineered bullshit of a system and scale it up.
What would fucking be useful right now is ANY god forsaken insight into what in the flying fuck your code is doing, or not doing, or why it makes queries to a database with no fucking records in it 🤦♂️ and then attempts to use that data... in case it did exist.
There's nothing like unpicking a mess of bullshit, and documenting it, and then have to remake it on a new platform.
Documention saves lives kids, maybe your own life one day😬16 -
OH MY FUCKING GOD! WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU REWRITE A FUCKING PIECE OF CODE AND DON'T MAINTAIN ITS FUNCTIONALITY?
ARE YOU FUCKING MAD????
JUST SPENT 1 FUCKING HOUR TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHY THE FUCK THE DATA WASN'T BEING PASSED TO REDUX STORE!
YEAH, UNIT TESTING SURE IS A FUCKING WASTE OF TIME YOU DUMB FUCKING IDIOT THAT HAS MASHED POTATOES FOR A BRAIN!
GO ROT IN HELL YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!!!
NOW IF I DON'T FIX THIS SHIT MY ASS IS ON THE LINE BECAUSE I MADE THE FUCKING FUNCTIONALITY THAT YOU BROKE?? NO FUCKING WAY!
I DON'T CARE IF YOU ARE MY BOSS, I'M GONNA GIT BLAME THE SHIT OUT OF YOU IF ANYONE PISSES ME OFF!1 -
I have always thought that I am to dumb to become a dev, but after a few years doing sysadmin shit I have realized that even the most stupid, dumb and idiotic people can be a wordpress developer!
There is still hope for me9 -
Holy shit! Apple deprecates OpenGL.
How dumb can they be? They really want to be this arrogant kid in the corner that only plays with itself, won't they?9 -
I can't help but be disappointed in the direction that technology has directed us into, especially social media.
While I love my girlfriend, she more often than not spends her time scrolling away at the dumbest shit on Instagram, Facebook, .. reels. Reels everywhere. And she's not dumb, mind you. She's an engineer just as much as you (presumably) and I are. Just in a different field.
When looking into it online and stumbling upon more than one study, I learned about the term it had been coined.. technoference. That's the constant interruption of social media into our day-to-day lives, and the dopamine kick it gives -- more so than IRL peers do. Why that is, being the digital equivalent to McDonald's, that's beyond me. But somehow it seems to be better, all while the content isn't even useful. It doesn't allow you to learn anything, to gain insights, or to explore things that could serve you in the real world. Cat videos and random shit that's somehow.. funny? Having pretty much completely disconnected from social media years ago, I seriously fail to see how.
Maybe us nerds in the 90's and early 2000's telling everyone else how we'd change the world and prove everyone who called us freaks wrong, disenchanted as we were (and probably still are), were the catalyst for this social disaster. We had the cognitive skills to do it, but not the social equivalent. I feel guilty... Even though I've always been part of a big tech resistance in some capacity, I still feel guilty. Because I'm one of those people with the skills of those who created this trash fire of a societal status quo. Everyone glued to their screens, 95% of the time not for work. Not even to aid one's ability to function in the real world. Just to combat boredom. All day, for many hours on end.
Where is it going to end? When will people realize the dystopia we got ourselves into? Will anyone but a few fight it? Would those who don't fight it even care?12 -
WTF is up with open-source projects using emojis in their commit messages... FUCKING emojis..
I get it, programming is fun and a hobby to many, but can we also keep at least a minimum level of professionalism here.
WTF is a wheelchair or bento emoji at the beginning of a commit message supposed to mean? Why the hell even bother to use it in the first place? There is no fucking reason for this retarded shit.
Is this what happens when activist developers get out of their way to make programming "inclusive"?
It is your personal project and so if you want to use emojis it is OK, I respect that (not really) but I can't trust your code, your commitment, or the quality of your work if I see those dumb Unicode characters there.
Git commit messages are not a game. Be playful with comments in code or your readme.md file but git messages should be a clear reflection of the changes not what a teenager's phone vomited on the keyboard.34 -
Stupid shitheads among the web designers, fucking listen up. Your fucking design is not the point of websites - the content is. You are not supposed to shove the content away to have your moron design shine in its purest debility.
Yeah I know, white space minimalism yadda yadda, clean interface - and you dumbasses just remove functionality to simulate a clean interface, to the point of using hamburger fuckups on desktop. Pull your heads out of your asses, that's not how to design an interface! Not to mention that you idiots still guzzle through the megabytes and dozens of domain lookups for your chickenshit minimalism.
While we're at it, not everyone is 20 years old like you youngsters - you won't believe it, but there is life beyond 40, and while such age is unthinkable to you because you are so dumb that you will hardly reach that age anyway, others on this planet have managed to get there. No 20/20 laser sight, you know.
Fuck you with your light grey thin fonts on white background because it looks "clean", it just SUCKS you wankers. Fuck you with your stupid ghost buttons that don't even look like a button. You know how to operate the shit you made, but reality check here, users spend most of their time on fucking other websites than on the abomination you have designed!
Get that into the shit bubble that you call your brain and read WCAG 2.1! That's not only for disabled people, but everyone will be able to use that shit better!8 -
We got the report made by the EU committee that is assigned to evaluate our project (robotics in the service of healthcare).
I was full on trashing the reviewers for writing some seriously dumb shit, and low-key dissing my professor. Until I got to the part where they addressed the work package I was responsible for. They referred to my work as impressive and innovative, and I was like, well, maybe they're not that bad 😂10 -
Write comments you dumb fucks.
If you change shit that is different from the original pattern， fucking write a comment.
1 minute vs. 45 minutes you mother fucker.14 -
Today I've been mocked by a fucking coffee machine.
So I was at a small train station, everything was already closed except for a small coffee machine
Dumb I, for whatever fucking reason, decided it'd be a great idea to get a highly overpriced cup there.
Now, the fucker made me the drink but instead of giving change, it started "shooting" coins in my direction (there was no flap on change box)
As I'm picking up my change, this abomination of a machine performs a cleanup, spitting some shit into my drink
I couldnt drink it obviously .. threw the overprices drink away, bought another one... Got shot with coins again... Whata pain... Just to figure out... There's no more cups 😭😭
It made the drink into the tray...
AaaAaAAAaaaaAAA
Fml4 -
A teacher from high school.
I finish the assignment early, shit on everyone’s head in terms of speed and performances and this guy first praises me, then slams the keyboard with random chars, letters and weird shit in an application which was supposed to only accept numbers.
“But… the requirements said…”
“I’m your manager and I am dumb af. Trust me, this will happen a lot irl.”4 -
Rant++
Just want to mention this mother fucker named Allen. Allen is a fuckin' badass. This guy fucks.
This bad mother fucker like single handedly wrote one of the best fuckin libraries for displaying tabular data, and threw in a shit ton of JSON capabilities just to make it that much fuckin' cooler.
And why? Because he fuckin fucks thats fucking why. I already told you.
And does this son of a fuck support his fucking product? You bet your sweet basement dwelling programming fucking ass that he does.
Dude works that support forum like he no doubt works that pussy. With full and complete knowledge and control, but with a gentle mature touch. Fuckin right.
Do you hate PHP? Well this fuck made a Node version? Do you hate Node? Use that shit with pure JS client side. This dude doesn't give a fuck. Don't have a table? Pass that shit JSON and GET A FUCKIN TABLE!!!
Some dipshit in your company needs to edit a database table but there's no way on sweet baby jesus's green earth you're giving that dumb fuck DB creds? Run that dumb fuck up a fully editable admin portal in like 5 fucking minutes because fuck him.
There are few things in my life I love. My corgi and my kids, and most days my wife.
But always fucking DATATABLES.
So, Allen Jardine... just wanted to give you and your product DataTables and Editor a fucking devRant shout out. It continues to be the one ray of light that works as expected and is extremely well supported when it doesn't and some days I just need that fucking consistency in my life man. So thanks.7 -
So I attended my first ever 18Hr hackathon and we named our team "Losers", as a matter of fact when our team won they pronounced us as "....and the Hackathon Winners are Losers", funniest dumb shit ever, I'm gonna start attending more hackathons from now on.5
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OMFG GOD BOSS!! JUST TELL ME ALREADY EVERYTHING I HAVE TO FUCKING KNOW ABOUT THIS FUCKING FEATURE!
EVERY FUCKING TIME I FINISH IT YOU GIVE ME SOME DETAIL THAT I HAVE TO REWORK PIECES OF IT!!
DUMB PIECE OF SHIT!!!3 -
How tf does these even make sense?! That's a fucking sledgehammer and large metal chisel on fucking steroids. If your parents don't know what the fuck those are and realize they have nothing to do with fixing a relatively flimsy box (in comparison) they probably need more than their WiFi fixed, but since they managed to fucking raise you, I doubt they're that dumb. I get that parents might not always understand technology, but shit, at least respect the fact that they survived without the Internet, which you probably couldn't do...
3 -
This is probably gona make me sound arrogant, but fuck it, you don’t know who I am, and I need to RANT!
I hate it when B.A.’s who have never studied UI or UX rail-road over my design decisions, and I just gota go along with it cos they in charge.
Then, when I make the interface the way they want it, all sorts of problems arise… Mother fucker, I saw this shit coming, and that’s why I designed it the way that I did.
Now I gota tell them how to solve the problems by doing what I originally said, and when they finally see the light, I gota waste more time re-doing the interface.
I once went through 5 fucking iterations of “Let’s try it this way”, Just to end up back with my original design spec cos these fuckers can’t even imagine what shit would look like, and how it will interact.
Now you would think after this happens a few times they would learn to trust my design skills, but noooo, Mr B.A. has to piss all over my ideas every time.
And every FUCKING time, we end up going back to what I originally proposed…
Learn your fucking lesson dumb ass!!!
*drops mic & goes straight to the bar*9 -
Holy fucking shit!
Look, I know I'm kinda average, I actually think I'm kinda stupid... But holy fuck this new mother fucker at work is in a fucking new level of dumb ... OMG!
I'm actually thinking about asking my boss to let him go and this guy isn't even there for 2 weeks yet.
19 -
When i was 15 i wanted to try myself at coding and hacking.
Yeah a bit ignorant i know.
Anyhow，i randomly found a python tutorial i believe.
Got things running and started the first tasks.
Create a var， associate a string. Create a second var and associate a new string.
Concat them and you get a new string with both of em together.
Then i told myself that this was fucking shit and i quit.
15 years later，i regret more and more that i let it go but what a fucking dumb tutorial that was...
17 years of coding and i would have been a fucking beast.15 -
I had a huge epiphany on Friday... not all developers enjoy coding.
Discovered when they brought down 2 of our environments, well told them what was wrong with the changes in their code that caused the environments to break, gave them links directly to the file in the gitlab repo that needed to be updated, and...
They fucking went home. The change would’ve taken all of about 30-45 seconds to update and they fucking left.
This person’s team lead come storming in pissed off because her manager is furious about 2 environments going down and preventing everyone else from being able to deploy their changes.
We provide the exact same details to the team lead about what needs to be changed, and advise that her team member took off....
30 mins later, her manager is storming up to us (devops/sre) livid as hell.
Explain the situation for a third time... manager is like, why can’t you guys fix it?
Look here you dense motherfuckers, we can fix the code. We can be the plumbers that clean up your shit. But what value do you gain as a developer if you don’t understand how the systems work and you keep pushing shit in?
Made the changes, fixed the environments, done right? Wrong.
The original developer made more changes not knowing what would happen and thoroughly fucked the environments again.
This dumb-fucking dumpster fire of a dude then sends us a slack message. “It’s down again, can you fix it?”
Our manager steps in and tells us to send him a link to the logs and have him fix it himself!
Thank goodness we have a badass manager.
Send logs, send repo file links (again), and send line numbers in the logs to try and help just a bit more. Dude goes almost the whole day without fixing it, environments are down, other devs are pissed, we throw this dude to the wolves. His manager starts to head over and was about to talk with my team lead when our manager steps out of his office and tells him the in’s and out’s of the situation and that our job isn’t to play log parser/error fixer for the developers. This dude that’s breaking the environments needs to be the one to fix the issue and his team lead should be aware of the problems and should have been able to correct his errors before it ever came to us.
The amount of hand-holding we do is ridiculous.
(Disclaimer, this one guy making some mistakes doesn’t sound too bad, but this is actually a common occurrence for like 40% of all of our developers)
We literally have interns still in college running circles around some of our full time devs. I know I’m not a developer, but for anyone that’s new-ish to developing, when you see shit like that please don’t lose hope. Those ass-hats got into programming purely for a paycheck, not because of passion.
Stick with it and your greatness will know no bounds 👍
As for you craptastic dipstick lickers, FUCK YOU!!! Go back to school and learn how to give a damn.4 -
I posted a "Periodic Table of Human Intellect" I created today, and thought it was worth sharing.
Ages:
0-14 = Dumb as fuck.
15-21 = Learning useless shit.
22-28 = Claiming to know everything. *
29-35 = Reality sets in.
36-48 = Fuuuuuuuuu...
48-59 = Deal with it and watch your step.
60+ = ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Of course, I'm still in the process of testing the predicted results of 48+ - but, I'm looking forward to no longer giving even half a shit.
(* Based on everything useless that they've learned.)16 -
STOP CODING MUTHERFUCKER AND THING YOU DUMB FUCK!!! THIIIINK!!!! IMPROVE!!! LEARN NEW SHIT!!!
STOP CODING TO CODE BETTER!13 -
I work for "a" company. This company has completely broken my desire to improve user experiences.
For instance, they have fetishized reducing the amount of clicks users have to go through to improve user productivity. Normally this is good, in their grossly mutated views, not so much.
They want ALL the data on a single page, and want people to use ctrl+f to find whatever they want on these pages instead of, ya know, a site-wide search(which fucking exists).
So this makes page times and UX horrible, some pages will take upwards of 2 minutes to completely load. 2 fucking minutes! My team and I had reduced these down to 15 seconds by reducing the data displayed and paginating it using some awesome JS lazy load functions. Not great by any real metric, but still a huge improvement.
You know who uses it out of 400 employees? Me. You know who still constantly gets complaints that the pages load really fuckin slowly? Still me!
Fuck these dumb asses and their retarded ideologies. They are stuck so far up 1990s ass they can practically TASTE Clintons' taint.
The culture is so toxic for developers it's absolutely abhorrent and depressing.
There is no freedom to do what you need to do because you're too busy doing the things they ask you to do. Follow that up with quarterly performance reports that bring up questions like, "What do you do for us?".
The only positive to working in this shithole is that they wouldn't dare fire you because they would never find anyone that would stay long enough to become an expert on this pile of shit. Over the last year we have gone through an entire 16 dev team, twice. That's 36 developers that just straight up quit in 12 months, and it's not like any of them worked together either. I would say 3-4 out of the first group met the second group, and 1-2 stuck around for the current group.
I don't normally rant like this, but I've been holding this shit in for a very long time and I can't hold it in.3 -
Is it too much to ask for the dumb ass devs behind Eclipse to fucking let a FRESH install - no plugins yet, open without crashing?
is that even a thing?
Fuck you Eclipse, and companies that make me use this useless pile of shit!
8 -
My school just tried to hinder my revision for finals now. They've denied me access just today of SSHing into my home computer. Vim & a filesystem is soo much better than pen and paper.
So I went up to the sysadmin about this. His response: "We're not allowing it any more". That's it - no reason. Now let's just hope that the sysadmin was dumb enough to only block port 22, not my IP address, so I can just pick another port to expose at home. To be honest, I was surprised that he even knew what SSH was. I mean, sure, they're hired as sysadmins, so they should probably know that stuff, but the sysadmins in my school are fucking brain dead.
For one, they used to block Google, and every other HTTPS site on their WiFi network because of an invalid certificate. Now it's even more difficult to access google as you need to know the proxy settings.
They switched over to forcing me to remote desktop to access my files at home, instead of the old, faster, better shared web folder (Windows server 2012 please help).
But the worst of it includes apparently having no password on their SQL server, STORING FUCKING PASSWORDS IN PLAIN TEXT allowing someone to hijack my session, and just leaving a file unprotected with a shit load of people's names, parents, and home addresses. That's some super sketchy illegal shit.
So if you sysadmins happen to be reading this on devRant, INSTEAD OF WASTING YOUR FUCKING TIME BLOCKING MORE WEBSITES THAN THEIR ARE LIVING HUMANS, HOW ABOUT TRY UPPING YOUR SECURITY, PASSWORDS LIKE "", "", and "gryph0n" ARE SHIT - MAKE IT BETTER SO US STUDENTS CAN ACTUALLY BROWSE MORE FREELY - I THINK I WANT TO PASS, NOT HAVE EVERY OTHER THING BLOCKED.
Thankfully I'm leaving this school in 3 weeks after my last exam. Sure, I could stay on with this "highly reputable" school, but I don't want to be fucking lied to about computer studies, I don't want to have to workaround your shitty methods of blocking. As far as I can tell, half of the reputation is from cheating. The students and sysadmins shouldn't have to have an arms race between circumventing restrictions and blocking those circumventions. Just make your shit work for once.
**On second thought, actually keep it like that. Most of the people I see in the school are c***s anyway - they deserve to have half of everything they try to do censored. I won't be around to care soon.**2 -
MOTHERFUCKING SHIT FOR BRAIN RETARDS POSTING UTTER DUMB QUESTIONS ON STACKOVERFLOW EXPECTING YOU TO JUST GIVE THEM THE ANSWER AND FUCK OFF.
I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THOSE MORONS THAT DO NOT EVEN HAVE THE DECENCY TO SAY THANK YOU, LET ALONE ACCEPT YOUR ANSWER WHICH THEY JUST COPY/PASTE IN THEIR SHITTY FUCKING CODEBASE FULL OP STRING CONCATENATION BULLCRAP. CRAWL BACK TO THE SHADOWS FROM WHENCE YOU CAME YOU DUMBASS SLACKER SOFTWARE-NOOBS. YOU HAVE NO PLACE AMONG CARING DEVELOPERS!!!7 -
For some reason my manager freaked out after her non developer husband told her that each of the web pages for our main service would take months to build. Shit man its just static content with some animations here and there. It is a total of 15 pages and this dude estimated that I (as in yours truly) would only be able to do 2 per month. Bato stfu. Stick to banking (hopefully your time estimates don't suck ass there) and let me woo your woman with my frontend godspeed.
So what did I do?
Simple, asked her to show me one of the design models she already created on photoshop. Saved that thing to my computer and coded it at home. In 2 hours (It was originally one but my dumbass gor tab trigger happy with rm rf autocomplete so I had to do it again...fking dumb) and showed it to her this morning.
Eat a dick dude. The woman is already going apeshit over all the other shit we have to do plus working on her masters and attentind 100+ pointless meetings a day whilst still being able to be the best fucking manager I've ever had. I really don't need her freaking the fuck out over your dumbfuck estimates. Why in the wholy fucking world she listened to your dumbass is beyond me, probably stress made her freak out.
Its cool b.....I got it under control.
Fucking chill woman damn.
**drops mic2 -
I've tried to stay out of the fray regarding replacing long-standing terminology to use "safe" inclusive wording instead because it doesn't seem like that big of a deal to me to just use the new wording. If the old wording wasn't hurting people (this is an argument that a of a lot of people use regarding this mass naming change movement) then the new wording shouldn't hurt anyone either...
that was just my 2 cents on the topic, until today!
Some dumb motherfuckers are trying to replace the word 'execute' with 'start'/'run'.
That's just some fucking ignorant plebian shit right there. The literal definition of execute is:
"The act or process to carry out fully or put completely into effect"
"to do what is provided or required by..."
"to perform what is required to give validity to..."
start and run don't grammatically encapsulate what execute does. And now I sound like a fucking grammar nazi because this shit is getting under my skin more than it should.
Execute's primary definition is grammatically correct for the context in which it is used.
Change Master/Slave for databases and I couldn't give a single solitary fuck about it. Primary/Secondary works just fine too. The grammatical context isn't blown away here.
But take away my execute and sudden I get all hot and bothered with the desire to punch a nun over how stupid this "offensive words" crusade is.
Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.15 -
I've been trying to update XCode for the past two weeks. AppStore keeps saying not enough disk space. Guess that's what you get when a fruit company makes computers!
5 -
TL;DR age != competence
My boss is a fucking computer illiterate self taught programmer.
Don't get me wrong, he can do shit, pretty shitty but it gets done...
But the dude has 38 fucking years old and somehow still searches for keys on the fucking keyboard and struggles to touch type anything...
I sometimes crying the fuck out when I have to help him with something...
I'm having a mini fucking panic attack right now just thinking of it... Fuck
He is our "manager" but doesn't even have the fucking balls to confront his own subordinates when they need to be confronted... Everyone is aware of this and everyone is fucking around... And no one sees any consequences... I wonder why deadlines are always missed...
He is so passive that every fucking thing someone asks he goes and says it is OK...
I was studying same psychology about ignorance and I think he lacks the understanding that shit is hard to do...
We literary had a conversation the other day something like that:
Boss: so, what do you think? One call to the api for it to return all data or multiple calls to return smaller ones?
Me: well... It takes ~180ms just for latency to the server for one call, if you have 10 calls it will take 180*10ms, it is better if we have one call and cache it if necessary on the backend.
( he has no fucking clue wtf caching is, besides browser cache)
Boss: (looking confuse AS FUCK!!) Well, I don't get it... Maybe I'll test it later.
Me thinking: test how you dumb motherfucker? On you fucking workstation with no fucking latency?
There is no fucking test. I'm stating it. IT IS A FUCKING FACT!
Me: well, it takes that for the call to go to the api and come back , its simple math. 1 == 180, 10 == 1800.
Suit yourself.7 -
Actually the worst fucking developer experience is meeting those all knowing people who think they know everything but actually they even don’t know how the fucking tools they’re using every day are written and how they work.
Those people that think when they installed library it should do everything how they imagined to and don’t fucking bother to debug problems and create pull requests if it’s fucking buggy.
Those fucking ranters who moan about something they don’t understand.
Those fuckers who think if they understood what A*, Dijkstra, graph algorithm is they’re smarter then others.
No you fuckers you’re dumb as fuck cause instead of explaining it to someone you just blame people for not knowing “obvious shit”.
All those fucking ignorants I am fucking writing about you.
You either start support each other or fuck you people.7 -
I'll start this by saying that i am neutral to Linux. I don't hate it but sure as hell don't like it either. But this still pisses me off. Fucking leftists and feminists are dictating how the Linux community should operate and doing so in the most disgusting way possible.
Those cock haters claim they are for inclusiveness but then create a code of conduct that is against white males.
We never cared about race or gender before. But because of actions like this we are starting to treat people differently based on gender and race. It is like we are going backwards instead of progressing and this is because of their "progressive" ideas.
Fuck you, you are making programming not fun anymore.
For me, I'll keep calling a spade a spade and don't give a fuck about anybody's feelings. We all should be doing this to combat this dumb shit being shoved down our throats.
For reference, I'm talking about this https://lulz.com/linux-devs-threate...25 -
I have to refactor code from an intern. He's VERY lucky that he already left the company.
If I'd say he programms like the first human that would be very insulting to that first human.
It looks like code at first sight, but when you try to understand what he was doing to achieve his goal you get a brainfuck. Duplicate code, unused code, dumb variable names like blRszN.
He wrote unittests like "expects Exception to be thrown or Server returns Statuscode 500".
Yes, Exception, the generic one.
THESE FUCKING TESTS ARE GREEN BECAUSE YOU DID NOT ACTUALLY TEST SOMETHING.
GREEN IN THIS CONTEXT MEANS: YOUR PRODUCTION CODE IS A BIG PILE OF SHIT.
I already removed 2 bugs in a test which caused another exception than the "expected" one and the test does still not reach the actual method under test.
Dumb fucktard.
The sad thing: The fuckers who did the code reviews and let this shit pass are still here writing code.4 -
It works.
How I hate that sentence.
Whenever that sentence pops up, I wanna take a frying pan, make some bacon, eat the bacon and slam the still hot pan with grease through someone's face till the skull breaks.
Why has he so many anger issues, one might ask.
Usually the sentence "It works" means that after looking at "working thing" it works wrong in 95 % of all cases, but hey - for 5 % it at least does *something* right. Not everything, don't get ya hope up.
We had this fun topic happening again today and I'm still too angry to sleep.
Lucene analysis of texts in Elasticsearch.
Stopword list? Multiple word n-grams per line, duplicates, not lower cased, not properly encoded.
Tokenizers? Duh. Why should one put them in proper order.... Or more realistic: There is an order in tokenizers necessary *devs with shocked faces*.
Language specific details... UHM. Wait. Languages are different? There are edge cases in languages? *more shocked faces*.
Even more shocking that if an text processing pipeline is implemented horribly wrong, it delivers wrong results. *mind blown*.
But our unit tests (this goes out to @kiki) were working.
Yeah. You dumb nuggets who even an amoeba would be ashamed of, when you only do positive tests in unit tests with the most obvious working examples, then your unit tests are just useless waste of nibbles.
Some of the devs are really a fucking waste of genetic information, should have probably ended better in a sock.
If this sounds too harsh, they had 2 weeks.
In just 3 hours I found out that they can redo that with supervision.
-.-
I'm getting too old for that shit. Seriously.4 -
Some of the penguin's finest insults (Some are by me, some are by others):
Disclaimer: We all make mistakes and I typically don't give people that kind of treatment, but sometimes, when someone is really thick, arrogant or just plain stupid, the aid of the verbal sledgehammer is neccessary.
"Yeah, you do that. And once you fucked it up, you'll go get me a coffee while I fix your shit again."
"Don't add me on Facebook or anything... Because if any of your shitty code is leaked, ever, I want to be able to plausibly deny knowing you instead of doing Seppuku."
"Yep, and that's the point where some dumbass script kiddie will come, see your fuckup and turn your nice little shop into a less nice but probably rather popular porn/phishing/malware source. I'll keep some of it for you if it's good."
"I really love working with professionals. But what the fuck are YOU doing here?"
"I have NO idea what your code intended to do - but that's the first time I saw RCE and SQLi in the same piece of SHIT! Thanks for saving me the hassle."
"If you think XSS is a feature, maybe you should be cleaning our shitter instead of writing our code?"
"Dude, do I look like I have blue hair, overweight and a tumblr account? If you want someone who'd rather lie to your face than insult you, go see HR or the catholics or something."
"The only reason for me NOT to support you getting fired would be if I was getting paid per bug found!"
"Go fdisk yourself!"
"You know, I doubt the one braincell you have can ping localhost and get a response." (That one's inspired by the BOFH).
"I say we move you to the blockchain. I'd volunteer to do the cutting." (A marketing dweeb suggested to move all our (confidential) customer data to the "blockchain").
"Look, I don't say you suck as a developer, but if you were this competent as a gardener, I'd be the first one to give you a hedgetrimmer and some space and just let evolution do its thing."
"Yeah, go fetch me a unicorn while you're chasing pink elephants."
"Can you please get as high as you were when this time estimate come up? I'd love to see you overdose."
"Fuck you all, I'm a creationist from now on. This guy's so dumb, there's literally no explanation how he could evolve. Sorry Darwin."
"You know, just ignore the bloodstain that I'll put on the wall by banging my head against it once you're gone."2 -
Well... I had in over 15 years of programming a lot of PHP / HTML projects where I asked myself: What psychopath could have written this?
(PHP haters: Just go trolling somewhere else...)
In my current project I've "inherited" a project which was running around ~ 15 years. Code Base looked solid to me... (Article system for ERP, huge company / branches system, lot of other modules for internal use... All in all: Not small.)
The original goal was to port to PHP 7 and to give it a fresh layout. Seemed doable...
The first days passed by - porting to an asset system, cleaning up the base system (login / logout / session & cookies... you know the drill).
And that was where it all went haywire.
I really have no clue how someone could have been so ignorant to not even think twice before setting cookies or doing other "header related" stuff without at least checking the result codes...
Basically the authentication / permission system was fully fucked up. It relied on redirecting the user via header modification to the login page with an error set in a GET variable...
Uh boy. That ain't funny.
Ported to session flash messages, checked if headers were sent, hard exit otherwise - redirect.
But then I got to the first layers of the whole "OOP class" related shit...
It's basically "whack a mole".
Whoever wrote this, was as dumb and as ignorant to build up a daisy chain of commands for fixing corner cases of corner cases of the regular command... If you don't understand what I mean, take the following example:
Permissions are based on group (accumulation of single permissions) and single permissions - to get all permissions from a user, you need to fetch both and build a unique array.
Well... The "names" for permissions are not unique. I'd never expected to be someone to be so stupid. Yes. You could have two permissions name "article_search" - while relying on uniqueness.
All in all all permissions are fetched once for lifetime of script and stored to a cache...
To fix this corner case… There is another function that fetches the results from the cache and returns simply "one" of the rights (getting permission array).
In case you need to get the ID of the other (yes... two identifiers used in the project for permissions - name and ID (auto increment key))...
Let's write another function on top of the function on top of the function.
My brain is seriously in deep fried mode.
Untangling this mess is basically like getting pumped up with pain killers and trying to solve logic riddles - it just doesn't work....
So... From redesigning and porting from PHP 7 I'm basically rewriting the whole base system to MVC, porting and touching every script, untangling this dumb shit of "functions" / "OOP" [or whatever you call this garbage] and then hoping everything works...
A huge thanks to AURA. http://auraphp.com/
It's incredibily useful in this case, as it has no dependencies and makes it very easy to get a solid ground without writing a whole framework by myself.
Amen.2 -
Why is skids trying so hard when it comes to talking shit about Windows? Do they think that is it the only way to get accepted into the GNU/Linux community?
Personally, I think people who does that look stupid and dumb.8 -
Please disregard. I just need to vent.
Being a manager is so fucking shit. This is not even about devs or tech specific only. Never become a manager.
Why? Because it’s about handling people and all the dumb shit they do. It’s all about knowing what people suck at and preventing that weakness from leaking into other areas. The amount of fucked up people on this earth means that you have to work with at least some of them, and that means putting up with their stupid ass list of super special requirements, that if they do not fulfill, will make them a shit worker. It’s not even an issue of technical skills.
You have the guys that are often late, because “they have depression”, but will complain that “companies don’t treat employees like adults”. Being on time for work is apparently very difficult. Which doesn’t generally matter in general for dev work, but it ends up affecting other things.
You have the completely socially inept idiots that make half the team hate them and try to avoid working with them, increasing problems and work for other people. Just because they’re socially stupid, have low or no empathy, or are incapable of not being insufferable to others.
You have the people that are so bad at estimating that they keep making up numbers instead of waiting to think for a few minutes and say “ not sure, I need to research and estimate that”.
You have the surprise absentee for dumb as fuck reasons like “my phone died lol sorry”. They never do anything to actually improve, it is just “sorry guys! Btw I will do jackshit about this”.
Or the ones whining about virtually everything, all the time. Wtf why do I have to be on scrum at 12 tomorrow?! Wtf why do I have to record the result of that customer call? Wtf why should I talk with XYZ?
And if you leave them alone, everything burns. They actually need someone to tell them “hey mate you need to improve that, shall we plan something to do so?”. I think managers are useless and unneeded when you have adults working, but it seems like most of the population is composed of children. It’s basically another form of daycare.
And you have to prepare shit around all of these constraints.
Then you have the one guy that reads the requirements, has common sense, and is inoffensive and can work like a normal adult human that needs no baby sitting. A ray of light on this shitshow.
I just want to go back to pure dev.22 -
It astounds me that people will actually pay thousands of dollars to come to a bootcamp and just fuck around...
Like we will spend an hour going over materials and concept and when it comes time to apply it and build something the kid next to me never knows what's going on! And then always asks me how to do it.
I tried being positive about it and be like hey if I can explain it to him...then that means I really know it!
Fast forward a couple weeks and I'm ready to strangle the kid.
He will sit on his phone playing games the whole time the lesson is going. Then when the lesson is over, put his phone down and immediately ask me how to do it...
The fuck!? Maybe if you'd just listen you'd know wtf you're doing by now you useless vapid brainless twatwaffle!
4 -
Whenever something goes mainstream and becomes buzzword there are annoying consequences of it.
First, it’s harder to find anything meaningful about the topic.
Second, suddenly everyone is an expert and web search starts to show not related products like promo codes, stupid videos, tutorials for dumb.
Third, old content that was interesting is lost under pile of shit or gets deleted.
I feel like I’m living in middle ages and before I try to watch something interesting it’s deleted by Spanish inquisition and replaced by some crap.
Most of expert content I have in favorites is returning 404 and youtube videos are deleted or private so from some time I started to backup all content I read or watch and find interesting in public networks.
Fortunately I have couple of terabytes of storage to backup interesting topics but I’m not happy that I’m back to times when I was saving internet page to floppy disk to show it to my friend later.
What a fucking nightmare.3 -
You dumb bitch. I will get to your fucking low level ticket when I’m done doing more important shit. How do you have a job if you don’t know how to use fucking excel?! GOOGLE IT you fuck!
-
My dev colleagues, the ceo, a external designer and me (dev) are sitting in the meeting room
and we discuss the result from the designer. He designed a complete relaunch of a
small CRM for the logistics sector.
The designer is a designer as you know him, big beart, small macbook, chai late
and he designed nothing, he hired a freelancer from romania.
My boss studied software development in the 80s but didn't really developed a software
for about 20 years, but he thinks he knows all and everything.
My boss is constantly complaining about the colors in the design and he would like
a iOS approach. Our system should complete copy the styles from iOS.
The really funny thing happend in just 1 minute. My boss is complaining again about the
colors and told the blue color is way to dark and the designer meant thats not possible the
blue color very bright. My boss sat next to the designer and looked not on the wall where
the picture was thrown from a projector, instead he looks from the side in the macbook screen
of the macbook which was in front of the designer. Then the designer says "Oh my god, the color
changes if I look from the side or from the top of the macbook." The Designer was blown away. My
boss couldn't believe it and did the same movements with his head and said. "Wow, you are right
the color changes".
We all other people couldn't believe that they are so dumb and thought this must be a joke. But
that wasn't a joke. After the meetin my boss told everyone in our company his results regarding the screen.
I wrote every story in a document, and I'm planning to create a book with dumb shit like this.2 -
at a previous job at a shit company ran by bible-thumpers, i was rebuilding the company website for my a-hole boss. I asked him where I should get images from- if there was a stock photo site he preferred or what.
"Just pull them off Google. That's what I do."
Later when I was combing through the site, I saw he'd added images that CLEARLY STATE another COMPANY'S NAME in the image themselves. Nothing like promoting another company on your OWN company website, huh?
(And no, their company name is not ActiveMobi.)
They're still there, 3+ years later. Dumb ass.
2 -
PM: Hey listen, client sent us his feedback about the app that we need to fix, they wont take time.
Me: Sure no problem.
5 Minutes later:
*Receives email*
*checks email*
15 easy tasks that take not time to finish BUT they are put inside ONE FUCKING TASK ON JIRA! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS THIS SHIT! 15 IN ONE YOU DUMB FUCK!
MOVE YOUR LAZY ASS AND WRITE EACH IN ITS OWN MOTHERFUCKING TASK!
Another reason on why I hate humans -_-1 -
Oh for fucks sake on a horse raping twat of a week.
It’s like everything that could go wrong did go wrong, from people fucking up, to orders being fucked up in multiple systems to me wanting to break someone’s fucking nose for being a complete dumb fuck. Seriously how do people that do a job, day in and day out go completely fucking brain dead and fuck things up beyond fucking repair over hundreds of orders.
Sorry but FUCK this shit, it can wait till fucking Monday you cunt rash of a shit. -
DO !!!NOT!!!!! USE 'X' AND 'P' TO 'CUT AND PASTE' A LOT OF LINES ACROSS FILES IN VIM!!! HOLY SHIT I JUST PWNED MYSELF SO HARD I LOST SO MUCH CODE HOLY FUCK IT'S NOT EVEN FUNNY! WHERE DID AT ALL GO YOU ASK, WHY THE FUCKING REGISTER, OK LET'S CHECK THE REGISTER, COOL THERE IT IS, BUT WAIT, THERE'S ONLY LIKE 20% OF IT BECAUSE WE CUT A SHIT LOAD OF LINES AT ONCE, AND THE REGISTER OVERFILLED.... Ok let's calm down, doesn't Vim have a recovery option? Yes it does, but WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE, MY CHANGES ARE NOT IN THE SWAP FILE BECAUSE IT'S NOT LIKE VIM CRASHED OR ANYTHING, MY DUMB-FUCK-ASS WILLFULLY WROTE THE CHANGES WHEN I SWITCHED OVER TO THE NEW FILE, AND NOW, WELL THAT'S IT, YOU'RE DEAD KIDDO, YOU WROTE THE CHANGES TO DISK, NOTHING YOU CAN DO, AND I AM SO SCREWED I SPECIFICALLY MADE A DEVRANT ACCOUNT TO MAKE SURE NO ONE ELSE PWNS HIMSELF AS HARD AS I JUST DID HOLY FUCK17
-
Crazy code.
You know when you come across some code, where you think: “I kinda see what you were going for, but it’s still hella dumb though...” right?
Currently doing some work on an F# backend, and the dev clearly knew enough of the language, but their code makes me question a lot.
The problem is simple: use a third party tool to generate images of each page in a pdf.
Said tool supports:
1. Querying the number of pages
2. Getting all pages as separate images in a single invocation
Can you guess how the dev solved it?
They’ve recursively incremented a page number, called the external tool to grab the image of that page.
“But how does it know when it’s run out of pages?” I hear you ask.
Simple. Catch the inevitable exception, and check against a hardcoded string literal to see whether it says “must be before the end of the document”.
I shit you not.
I nearly had an actual seizure when I was debugging some semi-related code and ended up in this wonderland of fuckery.
The recursion and pattern matching was flawless though, yet the tool’s website clearly states the supported functionality.
The whole thing feels like they tried to do it the right way, but couldn’t be bothered / couldn’t get it right, so they ended up creating this insane bit of madness.5 -
fuck you, man. eat a bag of dicks, a bag of shit and a shit load of dead animals.. you dumb fucking cunt ... go and die ... who the fuck modifies state of 3rd party object and think it is ok to do so.. the fucking prick deserves to get castrated with rusty, old school, gardening scissors...
through some mysterious, obfuscated, buried deep in the asshole code, the fucker decided to set a user-specific value in the default query params of guzzle so that every fucking object using it passes the fucking thing around like a cheap hooker at a dorm party... causing the API calls to misbehave because of the fucking thing.
you send the parameters you want to send but mister sucking-dick-up-the-ass-smarty-pants decided you don't want to do that and because of that I almost broke a core library a week before a fucking major feature release because half the functionality got broken automagically, worst thing is I have no fucking clue where the bloody thing gets inserted ...
I swear if you do that I will find you and I will get a rusty razor to cut your balls into paste and rectally infuse them untill your shit start to come out of every oriphise of your fucking empty head8 -
Urgh, fucking excel!
Why the fuck can't you handle a few thousand calculations you dumb ass piece of shit.
I am this close to... fuck, it crashed. 🤦♂️
I fucking give up.
Time to strap this data to a DB instead.7 -
I'm a jr developer. I started off in automation testing and don't mind it but the testing codebase is cancer, doesn't follow basic Java conventions even basic naming conventions like camelcase, and the tests are super slow using hardcoded Thread.sleep(). Since the automation tests are not automated, I have to run manually. YES manually, every morning I wake up early at 7am to run the 2.5 hour long tests (7am because this before people get to work and when the application goes back online). I run this bitch and monitor them but most of them fail anyways. I also have to write a email report on the results which means I have to explain why shit is failing so I have to debug all this crap. This shit literally eats up an additional 2-3 hours of my work day everyday and the time is not even accounted for. ALSO, since it's running on my laptop, it makes my computer slow most of the day. If I have to debug, I can't have the browser be headless so fuckin chrome browsers be popping up every 2 minutes. I did this for legitimately 8 sprints until I decided enough was enough and bitched about it and the team told me I had no choice. I eventually got them to push towards automating it but it's still in progress so I'm still running this dumb shit. The contractors try to take advantage of me any way they can by giving me mindless bitch work they don't want and they know I don't usually say no since I'm a jr resource. I hate running the fucking automation tumor. Sometimes I go into the meeting rooms alone to scream.
I feel like I'm wasting my life away and not learning as much as I could somewhere else10 -
Lenovo, you dumb fuck cunts.
How the fuck did you think it might be okay to ship a laptop with a BROKEN FUCKING WLAN DRIVER??????
This piece of shit doesn't even have RJ45 anymore.
And also who shit in your empty cavities where your brains should be when you thought it was a good thing to disable booting from anything but the main windows partition? My Mint installer stick works on any and everything I have ever tried him with except for this.3 -
Cracking old recovery CDs for the 9x/2000/XP era shines some light into how companies operated and when concepts came to be in that time:
Packard Bell: An EXE checks that you're running on a Packard Bell machine and reboots if it's not. How do we bypass it? Easy: just fucking delete it. The files to reinstall Windows from scratch come from...
...
C:?
Yup. Turns out Packard Bell was doing the recovery partition thing all the way back to the 9x era, maybe even further. Files aren't even on the restore disc so if your partition table got fucked (pretty common because malware and disk corruption) you were totally fucked and needed to repurchase Windows. (My dad, at the time, only charged at-cost OEM prices for a replacement retail copy. He knew it was dumb so he never sold PB machines.)
Compaq:
Computer check? Nope, remove one line from a BATCH file and it's gone.
Six archives, named "WINA.ZIP" through "WINF.ZIP" (plus one or two extras for OEM software) hold Windows. Problematic? Well... only because they never put the password anywhere so the installer can't install them. (Some interesting on-disc technician-only utils, though!)
Dell:
If not a Dell machine, lock up. Cause? CONFIG.SYS driver masquerading as OAK (the common CD driver) doing the check, then chainloading the real OAK driver. Simple fix: replace the fake driver with the real one.
Issues?
Would I mention this one if there weren't?
Disc is mounted on N:. Subdirectories work, but doing anything in them (a DIR, trying to execute something, trying to view shit in EDIT.COM) kicked you back to the disc root.
Installer couldn't find machine manifest in the MAP folder (it wanted your PC's serial before it'd let you install, to make sure you have the correct recovery disc) so it asked for 12-digit alphanumeric serial. The defined serials in the manifest were something like "02884902-01" or similar (8-2, all numbers) and it couldn't read the file so it couldn't show the right format, nor check for the right type.
Bypassing that issue, trying to do the ACTUAL install process caused nothing to happen... as all BATCHes for install think the CD should be on X:.
Welp.
well that was fun. Now to test on-real-PC behavior, as VBOX and VMWare both don't like the special hardware shit it tries to use. (Why does a textmode GUI need GPU acceleration, COMPAQ?????)4 -
I fucking HATE when people tell me:
"Oh you are using Unity? What kind of dumb shit uses Unity! Isnt its only purpose to make shovelware and shit?!"
THIS MAKES ME FURIOS AT MOST POINTS! AND I WANT TO PUNCH THOSE DIPWIT COCKS WHO ALWAYS THINK ANYTHING OTHER THAN UNITY IS GOOD, IN THE FUCKING FACE! TWICE!
unity isnt just for SHOVELWARE and CHEAP SHITGAMES, it has some really good potential when in the RIGHT FUCKING HANDS!! FOR FUCK SAKE!
(If you want an example look up dronethegame.com currently in crowdfunding) FUCK THESE PEOPLE...
FUCK17 -
I'm so fucking tired of OOP.
This bullshit never ends. Everyone treats OOP in their own, proper (of course) way. You read tons of those fashion books, like uncle bob and shit. and then comes a dumb asshole that starts reviewing your code, and tells you doing it wrong. FUCK. and you can't tell anything to your TL or PM cuz they are same dumb asholes. Because after you fix all the bullshit from the first asshole, those more responsible assholes come and tell you that you still doing it wrong.
- uh.. bruh, why don't you make interface for everything? that' S.O.L.I.D, you know.. it just right thing.
- bruh, why don't you use enum and switch case. we need a factory.
- bruh, we don't use abstract classes, use interface
- could you rewrite your linq/stream thing into a class and a method. it's just simpler for us. foreach loop is something everyone knows.
well,then go and LEARN the tool you're dealing with, coderfucker.
FUUUUCK.13 -
The effect of the scoring system is interesting.
On Facebook, where I usually spend most of my social media time, I have been training myself to NOT comment unless I really wanna engage, because I have an IRL habit of just talking shit just to hear myself speak that bleeds into my Facebook engagement, which is a character flaw I’m trying to change.
On here though, I will see something I wouldn’t normally respond to and I’ll comment cause I want those ++s.
BUT the quality of my comments on here are generally way “better” (more meaningful, usually kinder, etc) than my FB comments, obvi because I want those ++s and on Facebook I can be as dumb and mean as I want without having “consequences” aside from the obvious social consequences of people thinking I’m an asshole...but on here it kinda forces me to be more mindful of how I’m engaging with people5 -
auto.self.whatever.rant()
A few years ago, we had a lesson on git and stuff, and we had to create our first repository and push something on it to get familiar with the thing.
Our teacher jokingly said at the end "And always remember, no password in a repository!", and I thought to myself "who can be dumb enough to do actually do something like that?"
Now, guess which piece of shit had to reinstall two of his fucking servers because of security issues coming from not one but github repositories?4 -
Visual studio is a fucking piece of trash IDE and it should be banned from programming because of how SHIT it is, how can it not let met fucking reference things properly, why can't I acess the FUCKING FOLDER I'VE JUST CREATED, how can it not recognize that I've just added a folder from outside??
WHY EVERYTHING NEEDS TO BE DIFFUCULT WITH IT??????
Why can't it be smart like Android Studio :cries:
YOU ARE A FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT MICROSOFT, FIX YOUR FUCKING STUPID PIECE OF SHIT WORTHLESS DUMB IDE, FUCKING BILLIONAIRE COMPANY THAT CAN'T MAKE A SMART IDE, DUMB FUCK VISUAL STUDIO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!19 -
This happened with one of our senior profs during the first year of my college. I wouldn't call him a dev if my life depended on calling him a dev but regardless, I narrate the story here.
We were "taught" C++ by some really dumb professors during our first year of college and it was mandatory that everyone cleared the subject regardless of what field of engineering the students chose. Having already done 2 years of C++, it was quite a breeze for me. But during the final lab exam, one of my friends requested my help in solving the quite tough question (for those beginners). Thinking the exam and teaching was unfair, I stupidly wrote the answer on a piece of paper and passed it to him. One of our teachers, who had seen him ask me, was lying low waiting to catch me in the act and she swooped in and busted our asses kicking us out of the exam hall and sending us to the HoDs office like some prize from her war against academic corruption.
In the end, I failed the exam for cheating and had to redo (not only the exam but the entire lab course).
When I returned to college during the summer vacations to redo the course, I first met the antagonist of our story. Having a huge head that looked like a deformed watermelon and an ego the size of a building, he assaulted us first with a verbal diarrhoea of his achievements as a CS professor. I quickly realised that I was in a class of people who had failed to grasp how to make a program that printed "Hello World". To make things shorter, every question the prof gave us, I managed to solve in a mere matter of minutes, several better than his own solutions. Not having expected a student who knew his shit, he was determined to play me down. He hurled tougher question at me and I knocked them over his enormous head piercing his ego. He asked me such questions as how to reverse 1000 and get 0001 and wasn't satisfied with the several ways I gave because none of it were what he had in mind (which turned out to be storing them in a fucking array and printing them in reverse. That's printing not reversing you dung beetle). I kept my calm throughout but on the day of the final exam, he set quite a tough paper for a class of people who had already failed once. To his utter shock and dismay, I aced that too and I produced flawless code. This man who has an MTech from one of the most reputed colleges of my country then proceeded to tell me that he had to cut my marks because I had used more than one function when the question had asked for one function ( it never said only one). I lost my shit and pointed out that since I was the programmer, it was my wish how I coded. I also explained to him how repeating code is a bad practice and one should use functions to reduce redundancy and keep the code clean. Nevertheless, he lost his shit and he threatened me with consequences as apparently "I didn't know who I was messing with". I handed over the paper and stormed out of the class (though he called me back and tried to argue more with me. I apologized for losing my shit and left when he was done talking). I ended up getting a 'C'. Totally worth it.4 -
This piece of shit backend developer who our company fired sometimes back, cause he was spreading fake things about the company.
He was tasked to develop the admin panel for the websites we were working on..
Now, turns out, he had put multiple backdoors in his piece of shitty code.. He happened to designed the front end of the admin panel as well, which contained more than 3k js files..wtf!! And he did all that even after getting paid enough for that shitty code.
The projects where that shit was used are now under attack.. And my already hectic life has gotten even more hectic..
Fuck you dumb fuck.. You piece of shit developer...
I'm never gonna let him take another job.. I'll mail out official complaints and character reports, along with his history to each and every fucking company that he starts working in.. I'm gonna be his worst nightmare..I swear.2 -
You stupid lousy price of potato shit windows, yes that’s right - this pissed of windows user is pissed the fuck right off.
Here I am letting you sit there idling along and then I press the start button, you know that fucking button I press regularly for fucking years, only for you to go “fuck you, I’m going to blue screen instead” like what the flying fuck? There hasn’t been any updates in a while that I’ve noticed but this shit is just a shit.
So what ever, let’s reboot this mother fucker, oh wait now you can’t fucking boot, I can hear the hdd spinning a million miles an hour (coz non ssd) but noooo your just going to sit there like a dumb ass prick who doesn’t know what the fuck your doing.
So fine, let’s pull out that old USB with w10 on it and do a MBR repair... (coz nothing else will fucking work in your shit list of options) ok so apparently an MBR repair gets you booting.. but wait there’s more, now you useless piece of shit are going to run a scan disk which has sat at 0% for the past 20 minutes and I don’t think I’m ever going to see that fucker move, I get it you want to do something useful, but Fucking Do it already!
Like wtf, how does a stable system just decide to shit itself.
Oh and before you say it.. no I can’t install Linux on this piece of shit, see my previous rants for that problem.6 -
"Graphics don't matter."
I ranted a while back about gamedev being hard to get into for me, and, today, user @DOSnotCompute posted a similar experience.
I had a couple more thoughts, so thought should post them here (FUCK! It ended up being too fucking long! sorry!)
So I was watching the making of mortal kombat 3 on yt, which was pretty amazing btw because I got to see the actors of the sprites in game which were engraved in my and thousands of others kids minds.
Anyhow, the creators of the series, John Tobias and Ed Boon, were interviewed and what not. And it hit me that while both were the designers, John was the main artist and Ed was the programmer (at least for MK1). Another game that comes to mind Super Meat Boy, and I bet hundreds of others did the same.
And it got me thinking, maybe that's my problem, I just need an artist.
And I think the reason why I never thought of that is because of this idea that graphics don't matter.
"you don't need an artist. You don't need graphics. The most important thing is the gameplay."
What a load of shit.
A lot of people believe that because they got tired of polished AAA games with automatic and predictible gameplay.
People started parrotting this knee jerk of a conclusion since then.
It's dumb. Imagine if Infiminer, one of the games Minecraft was based on, which btw looks terrible, had all the same features Minecraft had.
I would still not touch that shit with a pole.
Graphics ARE important. Games are on the VISUAL medium.
That doesn't mean you're sucking Sony's dick on every AAA release or that every game should be made with UnreUnityCocksReloadedEngine.
Some level of visual craft is required for a game ro be considered such.
(btw, I think most of you guys here get this, not trying to pander, just that I want to make it clear that I'm not accusing this community of being guilty of this)
If a game looks bad (given, bad can be subjective), if it gives the impression that it wasn't seriously made, then you kinda lower your expectations.
People get hyped on games that look good, because it means that the game could be good. Games that look unoriginal or terrible won't get played, wether they're good or not. And I think it's a reasonable reaction.
How many times did I hear things like "Look at x video game from the 90s, the graphics are terrible but it's fun as hell".
That is an absurd statement. The level of production some NES games went through is insane. We're talking millions of dollars for games that today might look primitive.
The graphics weren't shit back then, and even today you could say that they are simpler but also of excellent craftsmanship.
I'm not into creating art, I hate it in fact because you can't quantify the success of produced art.
So, duh, find an artist. Ok, how? This is the part where I have no fucking idea how.
You start spamming shit like "I need an artist" online? I dunno, something for another post I guess.
I guess the most healthy thing I could do is making demos that might look like shit just to get experience so that when I get to find an artist, I have practice already.7 -
I used to hate marketing.
But now, I realised how powerful of a tool it is.
Indians are dumb and wide majority are fucking illiterate out of choice.
Dumb morons. Add as much glamour as possible, and you will be able to sell these fuckers anything.
99% of the elders in my family are illiterate. Many of my cousins post fake success photos and market themselves in family group.
All the boomers think that the kids are doing well. No critical thinking. In reality, those cousins are struggling like crazy.
The boomers, including my retarded father, think that I am a useless piece of shit. According to them, I am a waste of oxygen.
Trust me, market well and you can make billions in Indian market.
#BuildForNextBillionUsers9 -
Sometimes I really hate reading comment section and rants from
"my coworker/senior-dev/manager/boss/professor doesn't know X. I'm so much better and so underpaid"
It's like something is new to you or you didn't know something your mostly a dumbfuck which doesn't deserve his position or shouldn't be there ignoring all the other shit which brought you there. Ignoring a person's background or function. Sometimes this stuff is funny because you think he/she should know X but to call someone dumb/stupid/moron or so just because of this, I'll never get it people must have hughe inferiority complexes or so2 -
Hi all, first rant.
I work on an app on the Shopify platform, which requires me to look at the front end of people’s Shopify stores about half the day.
Can we PLEASE get the Shopify devs together and convince them to put a hard limit on the number of pop ups and slide ins and modal apps a single store can have running??? When a user (or app developer) can’t click on a product to buy it (or test installation) because ‘spin the wheel’ and ‘join the mailing list’ and ‘Karen in Ohio just bought a toaster’ won’t stop popping into the view, your UX is shit.
I realize people could still actually go in and build these things into their store code - but I’m willing to bet VERY few would.
Thanks - rant over.2 -
When will medium and its coding tutorials die out already? Why the hell are every fucking post of this plattform so cringy af, like tf why you start your tutorial with a fucking irrelevant meme you dumb asshole? Your code snippet is mostly garbage and you aint explain shit; I am not even sure if the code is yours. Go eat a dick and learn the subject properly before even start to teach people online.6
-
To long to read. So don’t do it.
I feel disappointed. It’s not about job or stuff. I’m disappointed about world in general. I don’t see my future on this planet anymore.
The world more or less looks like that :
Politics are trying to help you by stealing more money from you. The more you’re lucky the more money you will pay for it.
Media punch you with some family stuff from everywhere, give you young rich and far away, beautiful picture photos of places, people and food that you at most could visit once or twice per year during holidays that are break from work concentration camps.
If you’re lucky you’re rich or got rich or wealthy and infamous so you can walk wherever you want and don’t give a fuck what you wear but again your old friends are not so lucky bastards so you need to find new friends that are probably assholes. At the end most of the days you you’re doing nothing except killing time to meet with people you like during weekends or evenings.
Then there are families and everyone want to tell you that’s important. Family is like herd of assholes, if you’re weak they will sacrifice you and tell that you’re looser behind your back but when you get wealthy they will come back to tell you that when you were young and stupid they played with you so now you have to buy them some stuff or get them a job.
At the end there are people with “I wrote that book” certificate of excellence try to sell you opinions on everything starting from sexual positions ending on how to take a good dump. The problem is that the moment they wrote that book it becomes obsolete. Teachers of useless knowledge from last century that forgot about google or wikipedia.
All of them are playing your emotions, cause impulses and hormones are what makes you weak and people are looking for your weaknesses to take advantage of you. Get your money or get your attention and maybe even both at the same time. Cause views matter you know it. So like and subscribe dumb fucks.
If you’re lucky you find couple of them who aren’t doing that. Who the fuck knows why but this shit happens. It doesn’t matter if they’re family or you met them month ago. Those are only to keep and hardest to find. Unluckily those also can change by other people they meet or when they’re young.
If you can’t find a friend get a dog or cat or whatever animal you like. Their love is unconditional and obvious to read.
Well that’s most of the “I want to be spotted” culture that is all boring as fuck. Personalized ass and glamorous pictures and short movies of everything you don’t need but looks awesome. And as you see it’s still growing with more specialized portals like onlyfans, twitch and tiktok. We all need to look at what everyone else have or want to have cause 99% of time 99% of us are boring and is bored as fuck. Most of us can repeat same small amount set of stories all their life cause we’re not created to entertain.
I don’t feel joy looking at this shit fucked full of shit people arguing who’s dick is bigger. Who can post most dumb thing. I think I need a break but how to break from everything ? How to break from culture of money where to live on your country land you need to pay property tax ?
That’s all fucked up. Life’s fucked up.27 -
Biggest thing that pisses me off about windows 10 is the fact that they do not give two shits about wasting your internet, and they try to hide everything in obscure split settings, set updates to happen at a specific time sure but did your dumb ass remember to disable downloading app updates in the store? Probably not.
Heck how about we preload apps for you because you are on mobile aren't you, we know it is a desktop but we would really love to be the next android so here you go have apps all the apps.
Instead of being the foundation for things you actually intend to install we want to also give you a sample fucking 200 level tower that will take forever to demolish so you can start building the cozy cottage you do want.
I am digressing , but final thought is just that Windows can be a 1gb install since the rest of the shit is what fucktards that use a Samsung S8 just to facebook want.
Plebs.1 -
Is it just me or Social media has made everyone philosophers automatically.
Like pretty dumb and hopeless folks you know in real life be posting some smart and motivational shit they copied off of some random site.
Dude get your dumbass off my screen mehn...coming around here giving advice on how to make my life better...have you seen your life lately?
It can't be just me...13 -
TL;DR: shitty day, but stickers made my day
First off, I'd like to thank @dfox and @trogus for the stickers.
I had a really shitty day, It started off something like this. Usual day at University, faculty not teaching anything. Messed up shit with the girl I like very much, still not talking at this point. Pretty much downhill. Start teaching myself some Android, while this junior comes up me to be like 'please teach me this', ok sure. He fucking leaves the moment I start installing homebrew on his mac and says "you exploiting my mac", NO FUCKER I NEED A PACKAGE MANAGER TO GET PACKAGES YOU DUMB FUCK. Further, that day, come to know its half day and not going to learn shit. WTF! But still, I get attendance so it's good. I suggest going to this new cool place to grab lunch. the girl I like goes like this "Let's GO TO JAILLLLLLLLL, IT'S COOL PLACE TO HANGOUTTTTT" , LIKE. WHY THE FUCK YOU WANT TO HANG OUT AT A PLACE WHICH LITERALLY IS NAMED 'JAIL'. Fuck it, let's go. SO. FUCKING. NEGATIVE. PLACE. Food is ok, not good, ok. I'm fucked up and sad at this point because love of my life is hanging out with other people, I'm ended up in the shit corner of the world, with shit food. AND I HAVEN'T DONE ANY THING PRODUCTIVE.
But in the end of the day, I reach home. open gates see this parcel and I'M HAPPY AS FUCK. IT'S FUCKING STICKERS, OMG.
Seeing those stickers I realized I don't need to be sad anymore. Writing this post just to thank this amazing community and the members in it. I love you guys all, :) <3
3 -
How do working professionals find time to learn new tech? Work all weekdays... Shit tired on weekends this happens for few months and suddenly kids are b building ai and stuff and u just feel dumb.. how do you guys do it? How do you stay on top of the game?7
-
Why the shit is WebDev getting so complicated? It’s like everyone is just trying to show how smart they are instead of finding the simplest way to solve a problem. Or maybe I’m just too dumb to figure out what all this new shit does.4
-
hey helo i doNT GIVE A SHIT THAT YOU CANT READ MY DOCUMENTATION AND SPAM ME WITH QUESTIONS THAT HAVE THE ANSWER WRITTEN IN THE SPECIFICATION YOU WROTE IM PLAYING FUCKING LEAGUE YOU DUMB PIECE OF SHIT
-
The role of a Product Manager is just a decade or two old. Most organisations, including FAANG, are still figuring out what are the primary responsibilities of a PM.
A vast majority I know, including my dumbass, is struggling to keep things floating while in the role. Learning on the job is one of the only and most effective way to do so.
No wonder, imposter syndrome is so common in this group.
One of the main tasks is to make decisions. Important and impactful ones. The role came into existence to take the decision making load off our engineering friends while building any product.
This shit comes with huge responsibility.
BUT, not everyone understand this. In India, being a developer was a cool thing until 2018 and so everyone rushed into the role. Now somehow everyone started thinking being a Product Manager is cool because all you have to do is sit and shoot orders and things will happen magically.
I get reached out by so many folks every month asking for guidance and when I ask them what a PM does or why they want to be a PM, the narrative is more or less same.
Very few actually understand how taxing the role is or the challenges that we face while performing the job.
WHY THE FUCK ARE PEOPLE SO IGNORANT AND DUMB?
And in another news, my first week at new job was super amazing. Loved every bit of it. People are smart, processes are neat, things are structured, and lots and lots to learn for me.
How are you guys doing? Been a while that we spoke.
Official declaration: I am the dumbest person I know.10 -
Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb couldn't get their shit together for 3 months, but their bit is in order now. Will you work the weekend for free to make up the the schedule?
-
I've kinda ghosted DevRant so here's an update:
VueJS is pretty good and I'm happy using it, but it seems I need to start with React soon to gain more business partnerships :( I'm down to learn React, but I'd rather jump into Typescript or stick with Vue.
Webpack is cool and I like it more than my previous Gulp implementation.
Docker has become much more usable in the last 2 years, but it's still garbage on Windows/Mac when running an application that runs on Symfony...without docker-sync. File interactions are just too slow for some of my enterprise apps. docker-sync was a life-saver.
I wish I had swapped ALL links to XHR requests long ago. This pseudo-SPA architecture that I've got now (still server-side rendered) is pretty good. It allows my server to do what servers do best, while eliminating the overhead of reloading CSS/JS on every request. I wrote an ES6 component for this: https://github.com/HTMLGuyLLC/... - Frankly, I could give a shit if you think it's dumb or hate it or think I'm dumb, but I'd love to hear any ideas for improving it (it's open source for a reason). I've been told my script is super helpful for people who have Shopify sites and can't change the backend. I use it to modernize older apps.
ContentBuilder.js has improved a ton in the last year and they're having a sale that ends today if you have a need for something like that, take a look: https://innovastudio.com/content-bu...
I bought and returned a 2019 Macbook pro with i9. I'll stick with my 2015 until we see what's in store for 2020. Apple has really stopped making great products ever since Jobs died, and I can't imagine that he was THAT important to the company. Any idiot on the street can you tell you several ways they could improve the latest models...for instance, how about feedback when you click buttons in the touchbar? How about a skinnier trackpad so your wrists aren't constantly on it? How about always-available audio and brightness buttons? How about better ports...How about a bezel-less screen? How about better arrow keys so you can easily click the up arrow without hitting shift all the time? How about a keyboard that doesn't suck? I did love touch ID though, and the laptop was much lighter.
The Logitech MX Master 3 mouse was just released. I love my 2s, so I just ordered it. We'll see how it is!
PHPStorm still hasn't fixed a couple things that are bothering me with the terminal: can't reorder tabs with drag and drop, tabs are saved but don't reconnect to the server so the title is wrong if you reopen a project and forget that the terminal tabs are from your last session and no longer connected. I've accidentally tried to run scripts locally that were meant for the server more than once...
I just found out this exists: https://caniuse.email/
I'm going to be looking into Kubernetes soon. I keep seeing the name (docker for mac, digitalocean) so I'm curious.
AWS S3 Glacier is still a bitch to work with in 2019...wtf? Having to setup a Python script with a bunch of dependencies in order to remove all items in a vault before you can delete it is dumb. It's like they said "how can we make it difficult for people to remove shit so we can keep charging them forever?". I finally removed almost 2TB of data, but my computer had to run that script for a day....so dumb...6 -
Top reason to not be a dev?
Because you could't get through 9th grade Algebra you dumb piece of shit.5 -
Fuck you Intel.
Fucking admit that you're Hardware has a problem!
"Intel and other technology companies have been made aware of new security research describing software analysis methods that, when used for malicious purposes, have the potential to improperly gather sensitive data from computing devices that are operating as designed. Intel believes these exploits do not have the potential to corrupt, modify or delete data"
With Meltdown one process can fucking read everything that is in memory. Every password and every other sensible bit. Of course you can't change sensible data directly. You have to use the sensible data you gathered... Big fucking difference you dumb shits.
Meltown occurs because of hardware implemented speculative execution.
The solution is to fucking separate kernel- and user-adress space.
And you're saying that your hardware works how it should.
Shame on you.
I'm not saying that I don't tolerate mistakes like this. Shit happens.
But not having the balls to admit that it is because of the hardware makes me fucking angry.5 -
Can interviewers PLEASE stop asking cliche and terrible questions??
Interviewer: "Where do you see yourself in five years?"
Me: "Not with you guys obviously, you dumb piece of shit."
That's what I'd like to say to them at least... :/7 -
Software Engg here, applying for PhD after working 2 yrs @top5 giants.
Everyone is saying, without any "research experience", I stand ZERO chance of admission.
So, I'm expected to leave my 7 figure job, be someone's bitch for 6m to get a paper , and then maybe, JUST maybe I will be eligible for admission. WHY CAN'T I JUST LEARN IN THE 1ST YEAR OF PhD ?
STUPID MOTHERFUCKERS FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD GET INTO PhD ALL THE TIME. EVEN SOMEONE WHO CANT CODE FIBONACCI USING DP, GETS IN BY SHOWING FAKE RECO LETTERS(CASH), HIGH GPA (GATHERED BY LICKING EVERY TEACHER'S ASS), AND "RESEARCH EXPERIENCE" FROM PRIVATE UNIVERSITY BECAUSE THEY ARE TOOOO DUMB TO GEY INTO GOVT UNIVERSITY . (Seen myself)
I SWEAR TO GOD, IF I Don't get into PhD, this year, I'll probably loose my shit.10 -
1) Read the wiki on git. I probably have enough shorthands and test methods that you won't need much other shit to debug issues.
2) when debugging, remember that if it is there, there's a good reason why I put it there.
3) commented-out code is probably useful for maintenance. I left it there for a good reason. 😛
4) chances are whatever I wrote, was the state of the art at the time I wrote it. There might be better ways to do it now tho.
5) I always work modular. First, understand the structure. (probably also documented on wiki) DO NOT fuck up the structure. If you change it, you document it.
6) If you feel I wrote shit, it's probably because management annoyed the living shit out of me. Pun intended.
7) Your confusion is normal. I don't do dumb shit.4 -
I literally just had this conversation.
H: Me
C: Colleague
C: "Hey Hindsight, I'm having issues with our web print driver, it's not opening the browser after printing"
H: "Have you checked Interactive Mode in the installer so it opens the browser?"
C: "Yes"
H: "Are you sure you have the right domain name in your configuration file? It should be <thing.example.com>"
C: "Ah, it's just example.com. Should I just change it in the config?"
H: "No you need to regenerate the config from our server tool, because the server data needs to match your client config data"
C: "Ok, my config says <example.com>"
H: "Yes, just regenerate the config with <thing.example.com> instead for the domain"
C: "Ok I'll do that. What was the correct domain again?"
H: thinking "Holy shit can you really be that dumb!" but saying "<thing.example.com>"2 -
Couple of jobs back we got bought out by that massive shipping company with the red and yellow colors.
We used macs and some high up moron decided it was a good idea to put on domain policy restrictions on our macs, but developers can't work without admin access so if we wanted to keep said admin access, we had to sign a written agreement indicating that we were not allowed to do certain thing, like change our wallpaper or install personal music players, you know like Spotify, which at the time was what most of us used.
Now this was just a nice cherry on the cake of stupid descision that was making me rethink working there. Thanks to the high demand for skilled front ends, it was 11 am when we got this, 3pm I had comnfirmed my interview for the next day.
An hour later our manager called us all in to explain this was BS formalities. Well too fucking late, learn to communicate you dumb shit.1 -
I have a VP constantly harassing my people about some reports that we need to do as per federal law.
The thing is, these live inside of such system that I get to see exactly how many "hits" they get on a yearly basis. The only traffic we have on those sections is of people going ahead and putting the information from our reports there.
That's it, literally. Our user base does not go there. Federal agencies do not go there. No one gives two blips of shit about those sections. Yet she continuously acts like they are the most important thing in the fucking world. To make it better, I was told not to generate actual analytical data from said reports, since people with PHDs will come down on me to ask me who the fuck do I think I am from gauging them with such systems. So shit is a mute point on all fucking accounts.
I told my VP I can generate traffic information to let them know that shit is not really the most important thing in the fucking universe. His eyes glowed.
I don't want to see head rolls, but from staying till the next morning awake trying to give the best to our userbase, and just to be called out on shit like this as if I did not do enough for our people just.....well....it fucking hits man.
The worse part was me literally getting 30 minutes of sitting down after an all nighter, doing something for my users, to get to a meeting the next morning (I should not have driven there honestly) to hear this bitch complain about us not doing enough or not caring or whatever other bullshit she would spew.
I was livid, lack of sleep makes me dangerous. I turned to say something when my boss stopped me and took care of business. I seriously love this man. By all accounts and generational gaps a boomer, but one of the few good golden ones.
I just hate how unappreciated the realm of software development is by people that think that our shit is as simple as making a fucking powerpoint presentation.
Consolidate that with a director from another department taking all fucking glory during a major event of an application that I built by myself with 2 fucking weeks of no sleeping. And shit just gets glorious.
I have considered moving to other places, and heck, have gotten amazing offers, what with having a degree with a big fucking GPA and having the credentials of a senior, lead, full stack and manager role, the sky is the limit. But i know that if I leave then my users suffer, and I just can't fucking have that.
I have heard them speaking about doing something with X app that I built (with my department) I have even heard one of them saying "how is this made?" and a part of me hoped that it would be a good time to grab them and tell them of the field and the things that they can do. But I don't like announcing myself that way, always seemed to presumptuous, so I just smile, fuck yeah, my users are doing their thing with what I built to better their lives, what more can I have?
I have gotten criticisms from them, one recognized me, told me about his pain points and how it makes it hard for him to do what he must. Getting the data from the user base in an effort to make shit better for them drives me, my challenge being "how about this? better eh?"
But fucking execs man, think only of themselves, not the users, they forget about the users. Much like a shitty rock band forgetting about the music, about the fans.
I can't let that slide. But this fucking field. I sometimes fucking hate it, and I hate it because of the normies that don't understand and do not want to understand.
I do way too much, my guys do way too much and all I want is for the recognition to go to them. They do not need the ego boost, but to see my guys sitting in a meeting in which some dumb fuck is trying to drill us for taking to long, not doing something and what not, it fucking pisses me off. As their boss I always stand up and tell bitches off, but instead of learning, the bitches just keep pressing on their already defeated points.
Everything in human life gets fucking erradicated by: humans. People really do fucking suck.
I sometimes wish to go back, redo my diesel tech license and just work there, where I think one would be better of talking to an engine. But no, even then you get people, you have to interact with people, deal with people, and I am so far up my game and in my field that starting from scratch is a fucking mute point.
Maybe I need to keep fucking with stocks, get rich and just keep investing on bullshit. Whatever the fuck it takes me from having to feel the urge to choke a motherfucker in public.1 -
what an absolute condescending garbage post...
"brilliant coder who can't meet a deadline"? well, you're the idiot right there, you just admitted it - they are brilliant and you don't know how to set deadlines
imagine labeling someone who can't meet a workload DIFFICULT! god this is making me fucking fume
"normal management" - yeah this is normal management alright, treating everyone like they don't know what they are doing and expecting them to follow you blindly, sounds pretty normal to me
it's shit like this that leads to cocky ass young dumb managers who actually don't know shit about building a product themselves, but then turn around and think they instead have the ability to manage a team to do it... incredible
21 -
tl;dr - install ‘Pop!_os’ and try it out if you haven’t yet, it’s pretty damn good!
Heavy Micro$haft user here, have tried using ubuntu a bunch of times in the past and fucking regretted it every time. Ran into issues with stupid shit like the apt cache growing exponentially until the drive was full, or something like the the system python getting borked.
To be fair, I’m 120% certain my dumb-assery is what caused the problems. I’m definitely not trying to blame the OS. But my experience was shitty, even if it was at my own hands lol.
Started playing around with Pop!_os from the system76 team. And I’m seriously in freakin’ love with this OS. It’s clean, is performant, feels way less buggy or just feels more stable somehow. I know it’s based on ubuntu, but I’ve had a great time thus far using it. I’ve got ansible, docker, aws toolkit, aws cli, sam-cli, vscode, dynamodb-local, serverless, npm, brew, and working on steam now.
Everything has been a breeze and again the system feels really fast and snappy. It feels a lot like mac on the smoothness scale, but snappy like a windows box with beefy hardware specs.
I’m still just in the testing phase on a VM, but I’m seriously thinking about blowing away my windows install for Pop!_os.
(I’ll try arch someday when I’m up for some hardcore masochism)8 -
What happened to the warm welcome that new users received back in the day? Now when someone posts their first rant people bash on details and give them no chance. I remember posting half-dumb rants, but no one gave me shit for that. It takes time to grow into a community, you can't just expect people to behave identically to the rest. Makes me a bit disappointed to be fair.9
-
First company:
- being sat at an office that didn't have chairs with proper back support. It would kill my back every day. Like sitting on a bar stool coding.
- not having access to basic resources (cafeteria, salary bonuses)
- being seriously underpaid ($200 under)
- not having an IT process pipeline (yeah, this is a huge one): no JIRA, no git, no VCS, no continuous integration, etc. I fucking spend 45% of the time fixing coding-unrelated shit.
Second company (very aggravating):
- dumb frontend bitch and privileged colleague who both kept telling me months on end to shut up and who wouldn't listen to my advice on anything, while my advice would actually help the company advance in productive ways. The key here is being told to shut up while stagnating. i.e. dead end job.
- people advancing in the company based on nepotism and favoritism, based on having tits and ass, rather than skills and independence.
- pointlessssssssss meetings where decisions are made solely based on the opinion of Mr. favorite senior dev. The rest just sits there like a bunch of sad saps and yay-nodders. Incompetent PO's who "would like to hear your input" but then when you give it, they completely dismiss you.
- pointlessssssssss monthly meetings with stakeholders, where the dev teams do nothing but clash and act like pussies in front of the PM just to get in his favor, but behind scenes continue to make the same mistakes and telling the CEO everything is fine. Goodness, how can it get more unproductive.
- completely antisocial and nepotistic 'colleagues' who won't even talk to you, let alone smile at you or be friendly. You saying good morning and them pretending you're vapor that doesn't exist. Go go company atmosphere! Especially during lunch, those are the worst times. Imagine sitting at lunch where everyone looks like you killed their dog and the rest is huddled up in little high school groups.
What else? The incessant and pointless smalltalk that makes me want to bang my head against the wall. Talking about dogs, kids, what show was on tv last night. The fuck man, do you have a brain?!
Third company:
- HR bitches who think they are the shit and developers are antisocial, helpless misfits, but they work with computers and they don't even fucking know what a status bar is! The irony!
- forced socializing and stigmatization for the opposite. Imagine coming into a company and you don't say good morning. Should that be a problem? No. Instead, everyone starts dogging on you and hating you just because you didn't smile in their faces and said: hiiiiiiiiiiii how did you sleep? Did you feed your dog? Fuck you.
Elliot (Mr. Robot): "Wouldn't it be awesome if there was a mute button for life?" -boop, boop, boop, boop...- Ahh.. there.. that's much better."
- CEO's sucking up to you but when it comes to salary increase, they say shit like: "Ahhh ya know, it's kinda difficult." Yet another dead end job.2 -
Why can't you just fucking tell me what type of website you want. Every week you are fucking adding/removing new features and don't want to pay for it. You know what? Fuck you! From next week Monday I' am putting your website on hold until you agree to pay for the changes we made for the past 3 weeks.
On the same note, fuck you to my General Manager who thinks he will get laid for not charging for the changes made to the website. She is just using you dumb piece of shit.1 -
It is fucking written in rules that SLA would be given post the discussion.
AFTER THE MOTHERFUCKING DISCUSSION.
Bitch can't read a simple English statement.
And in the SLA column, it is clearly mentioned that one must state the DATE. This idiot mentions the entire fucking Quarter.
How fucking dumb you can be to not read the basics mentioned for your own and others ease of functioning.
Indians are illiterate morons. I apologise to the entire world today on behalf of these fragmented cauliflowers.
To whoever this means, I am sorry that you have to deal with these retarded brains.
Also, the task was supposed to be done by others and not the blabbering bitch. She takes up random unwated shit and then cribs to our manager that she is overloaded and Floyd isn't helping.
When I help, she complains that I am overstepping.
Go fuck yourself you mongoose.9 -
Stop whining for fucks sake.
I'd rather listen to high pitched coil whine than enduring this frigging shit.
If it doesn't work - fix it.
If you're to dumb - fix yourself.
I've told you motherfucking gazillion times that your bitching is absolute waste of time you inbred relict of an homo erectus.
I wanna gag a certain someone with duct tape who's annoying since weeks... And send him in a package to a nice russian Gulag some where in sibiria
:@18 -
Oh my motherfucking God...
How the fuck can a dumb IDE be so fucking slow? I entered the office at 8:15. And I am still unable to checkout a motherfucking previous version of an android app in git and get Android studio to build it, because the fucking gradle is so damn slow it freezes the GUI. WHAT. THE. FUCK. Android studio get you shit together and maybe, just maybe don't be such a dick!!!
You need 5 min to open that project and another 10 to build it ONLY FOR ME TO REALIZE THAT I HAVE TO REPEAT THAT WHOLE PROCEDURE BECAUSE I NEED A DIFFERENT APP VERSION FROM THE GIT REPO FUCK YOU YOU SHITFACED STUPID COCKSUCKING CUNT, SHIT FUCK ARRRRGH!!!
Sincerely,
Me.
Edit: now it's 9:35 btw6 -
The site I work on is a market where you can buy magnets for dolors, insomniaque, bla bla bla (I don't believe a sec in this).
Just saying that to settle that 80% of our customers are +45 years old. They weren't born with a computer in their hands, and they sometimes manage to make a lot of mess in the site.
We are based in France, and we sell the most in France (no shit) and Switzerland. And this is the third time that a Swiss pass a command, puts all her address in Switzerland EXCEPT for the country (still on France) so she doesn't have to pay the shipping fee. I should do something about that, like a regex when verifying the zip code, but I have more urgent work to do, and the best has to come.
This smartass doesn't know she is the joke, because by saying she is in France, she has to pay the VAT that she wouldn't have if she said she was in Switzerland. She buys in general for around 350 €, so she has ~ 70€ (20%) in VAT, and she would only pay 14€ in shipping fee.
Maybe one day she'll see how dumb she is (my boss already mailed her so she pays attention to it, no change). But I think I would have set the regex by then. -
I was making changes in JS and it did not get reflected into the browser, spent 3 hours on it. Later realised I was making changes in the wrong JS file. Have never felt this dumb in my life.4
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*cracks knuckles*
Boy was I happy to see this when I opened devRant up.
So for starters, more group projects are necessary. Many reasons why. To begin with, it allows for more complex programs than getting some input and printing some shit out. It also develops interpersonal skills (I hate people too, but when you go out to look for work you'll be with them, so better get used to it soon). If a platform like GitHub is used, it's easy to track who did what, and see what each person in the group did, so it should be fairly easy to discourage lazy asses.
Beyond that, stop giving us half completed assignments and asking us to fill in a function/method. Yes, it will take longer. But one doesn't learn to program by doing the minimum required work, you've got to crash and burn a lot in order to git gud. So ffs, let us do all the work. We're like AI, we learn through reinforcement learning.
Stop giving us a spec to follow. We'll do plenty of that in the future, right now we need to make mistakes, not be held by the hand all the way. Let us do dumb shit so you can fail us and tell us our code is repulsive, and this other way was better. Explain why. That's how people learn, not by telling us what each function should return, what can and can't be used, etc. And if you can't come up with a scenario in which what you're teaching is useful, then maybe you're not teaching us the right material.
I'll leave it at that for today... But I'll be back 😈 -
The good: use the hardware watchdog in your application control flow.
The bad: don't use a watchdog.
The ugly: trigger the watchdog from a fucking timer interrupt.3 -
Hello, my name is Adam, I'm from Poland.
As a 16 year old dude I thought it would be a great idea to go to an IT focused highschool so I'd get my degree after finishing school but guess what- I completely fucked up.
First, there were the little things, like the teachers favoring other students that already knew stuff, which was okay and all- the problem began when Poziomka appreared (one of our PC service teachers). That motherfucker almost fluked me because of dumb shit like the PC's we worked on took forever to boot, so he's just go and give people F's, "Why?" you may ask- well because "It was obviously the student that made the PC run so slowely".
There were a few more incidents like when we were disassembling and assembling those dumb HP Compaq's PC's on time- and that fucker gave me an F because it took about 10 minutes to boot by itself.
That shit got me so demotivated its unreal, soon I found myself in a pretty dark spot, with my parents divorcing, my whore mother taking all the money- me not finding any reason to do anything in school and the cycle looped.
I'm not gonna pull the depression card here, but what I'm generally trying to say is that although I'm not "awful" at IT in general, so PC assembly, networking, programming (fuck that, I'm fucking awful at it), HTML, I still find it difficult to do anything right.
I have a question, how do I get myself back up? Any ideas?
There's so much material I've gone through in the last three years- and I just wanna make sure to get good- somehow.
I'm just a talentless dumbass kid who just wants to know how to do linux, programming and such, but I don't know where or how to start anymore.
If anyone has any stories where they turned their life around and managed to do IT right- please, tell me how you did it, I just wanna know is there a proper way of doing it.
- Adam
13 -
I take the train well out side of rush hour when the trains are about half empty (though most seats taken). I have to come in because it's not like I can afford to have a workspace comparable to the cockpit of the millennium falcon both at home and at work.
I don't believe going into a panic about coronavirus but take obvious basic precautions to at least reduce the chance and slow the spread and that should do a good amount to reduce overloading the system. I kid you not, at this point medical facilities are considering buying diving equipment for enriched O2 supplies to keep up.
Today, as usual, some fucking piece of shit cunt twat psycho beggar that literally needs to be in an asylum with a massive fucking great gob of snot dangling out his nose is going up the entire train, every carriage, begging groping every hand rail along the way and potentially exposing several hundred people every hour.
I told this sorry sack of shit, surprisingly politely, that he'll end up rapidly spreading coronavirus if he keeps going all the way up and down the carriage like that. After he's fucking muttering on trying to make people feel bad about fucking ignoring him not being all caring and shit and then doesn't give a shit about giving everyone coronavirus after fucking waltzing down the entire fucking length of the train his pockets stuffed with coin. Then he threatens to assault me. I was fucking this > < far away from unleashing a life changing beat down and kicking his ass off the train with no pain or injury spared.
At the same time, that piece of scum waste of skin the mayor has apparently informed the public that you can't get coronavirus on the train or buses. How the fuck did he come to that conclusion? Is this really happening? How can something that clinically fucking thick as shit be our lord and master?
I fucking thought the great toilet paper rush was brain dead. Jesus fucking Christ and people voted for this fucking championship moron. Why don't they just all save themselves the fucking hassle and all march themselves off a fucking cliff?
These dumb shits without two neurons to rub together only need to put a dozen or so plain clothed police offices on the trains to catch these fuckers.
Why am I even fucking paying taxes? Where's it all fucking going? Another fucking lets give a billion quid to Fujitsu fucking failed IT project again I bet. Can't people bloody do anything these days? Does there have to be an app for fucking everything?
Someone should make a fucking facial recognition app so I can snap a shot of these fuckers and then if one of these fucking passes the phone camera anyone else with the app it'll set of there's a fucking imbecile in the vicinity alert.
These people need to be dragged out into the street, lined up against the wall and shot. No remorse. Toss them in a pit, cover it with dirt and be done with it. Why even bother with the execution? Throw them down the hole and fill it with dirt.
You don't have to go mental like it's the plague but people could at least show some fucking common sense, common decency and basic decorum. Even minimal measures, is that much to ask? Absolute scum of the Earth. How we even allow them to walk to Earth I do not fucking know.1 -
Why the fuck everyone in indian game dev industry is obsessed with unity fuckkkkkk !
Don't you know you only need some lite runtime like OGL or SDL for those shitty "hyper casual" games
Also why the fuck is an experience in building hyper casual games is a requirement isn't this side scroller hack and slash knockoff good enough for you to know I'm competent enough
Fuck you dumb shit for brains people who are heating up phones by using unity just for a shoot the hoops game.7 -
HA DUMB SCHOOL. our school is throwing away a shit ton of server and desktops and I wanna grab some of them.
9 -
For all my friends here who have known me for years can easily notice there has been a drastic change in me.
I used to be confident. That shit was hollow but I used to laugh in the face of fear. I was ignorant and that ignorance fueled a lot of the much needed confidence.
Over the years, I learned a lot. The more I know, the more I realised how much I don't know. And for all that I know, I have to use the brain power to retain and implement it, else it rusts.
This image is of my 2021 goals that I drafted last December. Wasn't able to achieve the first, the last and the art one. But surely got myself surrounded by some of the smartest people I have ever worked with.
Now they have rightly said, be careful with what you wish for.
MY CONFIDENCE IS SHATTERED.
I feel dumb. Constant imposter syndrome. While I am learning every moment and there is no measure to it, I feel incompetent to an extent that I have started questioning how did I even reach this far?!
While, yet again I am the youngest in my team, my manager is bit micromanaging and agressive with OKRs/KPIs and tech team isn't very supportive creating constant friction (something I never faced with developers in my life because devs are my best friends), I fear how much more time will I take to ramp up in this new job and feel confident enough to tackle things on my own without constant nudge from leadership or different teams?
Or is it just that I have burnt out firefighting and lost the motivation I had?
After all, what does this all even mean?
10 -
I am so mad, I have no words for how fucking much I hate ever having to work or pass work to other incompetent developers or teams, what a fucking waste of time and resources.
After handing off the frontend - for the client to find some team, that would do it in the short time and budget he needs (multiple developers, more fast, much good), he found a team that seemed to be alright for the job and seemed alright to me too, now maybe a month or two later, the client contacts me, that they fucked something up and if I could talk to them.
The email I then received from them seriously made me speechles, mad and sad, all at same time, I spent multiple upon multiple hours, getting a very good readable documentation up (markdown with TOC, properly rendered headers, bulletpoints, all that shit), with all files, all services used, all credentials, even converted all ssh keys into putty ppk format, in case the developers are using windows and are too dumb to do it themselves, nginx configs, it had seriously everything, even too much to list.
They somehow managed to fuck up the entire server, while attempting to "add ssh keys themselves", EVEN FUCKING THOUGH I have included all the keys they need, all the hosting credentials, everything, yet they decided to fuck with shit themselves and completely annihilate the server in the process (HOW?!), so not even the webserver works anymore.
I am fucking speechless, I made it so fucking easy to gather all info and files they need, all properly put into well named folders, along the documentation in an archive and they somehow managed to nuke the fucking server, while attempting to add ssh keys?!
If you don't know how to config a server, then don't fucking touch it and just use everything, that got served to you on a fucking silver platter.
---
I'll just instantly answer the most annoying comment, that somebody could come up with: "why didn't you do it yourself?"
Because in a perfect world, a fully managed team, can do much more than a single developer can, especially in the same timeframe and from what I heard of said client, atleast they did something in terms of developing the system. (which surprises me, considering it's the same people that nuked a server, while trying to add ssh keys)5 -
*sigh*
So we have this supervisor that I’ve mentioned before in my previous rant(read if interested). This man has been a pain to my side since I started working here. He does a phenomenally good job at being a douche bag and he has the need to resort to screaming and yelling if you happen to disagree with his methodology in any point of you. He likes to make fun of and be little you as well. Oh and I’ll mention he does it in front of all your co-workers. All bad habits and even less from some one in a supervisor position.
I think I’m a pretty reasonable guy, I try to get my work done only asking for help when absolutely necessary ie idk what’s going on or I’m stuck. This guy has the bad habit of breathing over your shoulder while you’re working......... Anyway I hit a breaking point today and waited til he was in his office to confront him.
I asked to walk in politely and asked if I could close the door it was a personal matter. After I sat down and vented to him explaining that what he’s doing with this egotistical persona of his is wrong and it’s creating an environment that cause everyone to feel like shit thus cause lowered work efficiency. I told him that belittling and offending is a bad tactic and that we are grown ass adults. It shouldn’t be necessary for you to yell or make fun of me, shit if I wanted to eat yelled at I’d go home to my father. He’s allowed this guy is not.
Well cutting it short I finished the convo and he didn’t say much just agreed with some points and stressed others that would be too much to mention. I’m not dumb either I recorded the convo just in case he tries to pull something. But I get the feeling like this is gonna turn out really well or it’s gonna go south.
Just wanted to rant to the rantFam first.
I’m done now.6 -
Unpopular opinion:
Ubuntu is a dumb piece of shit with so many bugs lying around, especially when you try to get an alternative to Unity or Gnome.
Windows does have bugs too, but at least I don't run into six new bugs everyday which are so bad I can't even work.5 -
I am a bad developer. I know nothing. I had a very simple requirement just to change the strings.
I couldn't collect all the requirements. I connected with PM offline, slow replies and miscommunications. Ahh!! How will I be shipping bigger projects? I have 3 years of development, in my last company we worked totally different though.
So, at the time when I thought I will be raising a PR I am stuck on the requirements.
I am a dumb shit. I can't do anything right. A simple requirement I am not able to deliver. I am so embarassed. :(12 -
What an awesome navigation bar 🤗 please navigate me to site `-1` 😂😂 and then making a drawback 'n' fail with a server error page 👌😉
1 -
Some fuckin ppl man wtf, as a said here before I'm not the most skilled or elegant developer at my company but fuck me am not as dumb as some fuckin cunts
We have 2 separate packages dedicated to add reusable components but some asshole with shit for brains just keeps adding these components in one of the main repos and it's like r u retarded or something, like u know that's not what's meant to happen cause you've used the components from those other repos. Sometime I jus wanna die and I've only been working as a dev for about 2 yrs 🤦♂️3 -
I'm amazed how some people either think I'm fucking jesus or a god or both.
App XY not working.
Yeah. We're talking about how App XY and it's exhaustion of the connection pool since a year....
It's not working, what can we do?
Well. I don't know. Tried restarting?
Not working.
Well... Nothing I can do, you're responsible for developing the app and we've talked many times how complex the problem is.
It's not working, can u do something?
<Me just fed up increasing the connection count>
Well. I've increased the connections.
This will not work. It's a band aid. The app needs really a complete migration.
Ok. But it works.
No it doesn't work.. For fucks sake... It still exhausts the connections for unknown reasons, this is a band aid.
But it works....
-.-
This conversations was over then....
Well. Have fun.
I reverted the change I did.
May this crappy piece of shit die a thousand deaths, I:m now working on something else.
Goodbye mother fucking bitches, habe fun with the nightmare you created.
I'll cry over the other fucking nightmares I at least can solve, cause what you created in this App is beyond irresponsible and dumb.4 -
If I ever get the chance to start my own company or pick out the dev team I work with... I will never, ever, ever work with anyone who doesn't understand how to abstract out a problem. Our prod DB is a mess and our API is a mess because we left it to some dudes who are dumb as shit and doing everything ad-hoc. Now their ad-hoc shit doesn't work anymore and I get to clean it up. 😫😞FML
-
(Hopefully this is the meta rant to kill meta rants)
I'm fucking sick of devrant.
New users posting shit memes with the wrong tags.
But worse are old users complaining about said new users, or just beginner devs from other sites
Yes, some people need stack overflow every 5 minutes.
Not everyone has the capacity to understand every documentation.
Not every documentation is updated or entirely correct.
Not everyone has more than a year or two of experience.
Don't be part of the dumb circlejerk. Just complain about your bullshit boss, coworker or tech.11 -
i was hired to join a team of old devs (40+) in an unnamed European country "yay goodbye 3rd world it's time to enjoy the quality of life" assist with enhancing already existing software and creating new solutions.
prior to my arrival most things were slow and super buggy, looking at the code base it shouldn't be a surprise, amateur hour everyone, logic implemented that is not needed, comment driven development, last time code review was done back in 1996. lots of anti patterns.
i swear there is a for loop that does nothing but it loops through a 100+ elements list, trunk based development with tfs since git is "not really needed"
test projects are not there.
>enter me an educated fool, with genuine passion for the craft and somehow a decent amount of knowledge.
>spent the last year fixing stuff educating people on principles and qualities.
> countless hours of training and explaining. team is showing cooperation, a new requirement comes in to develop with react.
> tear my ass creating reusable shit and self explanatory code with proper naming etc using git with feature branching, monday is first deployment day.
> today a colleague was working on an item submit a pull request and self approve it
> look at the code..... WTF the dumb fuck copied and pasted the whole code from different kendo components but somehow managed to refractor the name to test component, commented out all the code that he didn't use did the api call directly from the component, has 2 useeffects that depends on the a fucking text box changes for no reason, no redux implementation, the acceptance criteria is not achieved, and it doesn't work it just look right.
> first world country shit cannot scold, cannot complain, lead by example.
>asked him why you did this, the response was yeah probably i shouldn't have done that, i really didn't understand anything in the training but didn't want to waste time!!!!
> rest of the team created a different styled disaster with different flavors they don't even name their shit the same way.
fellow developers I'm stuck in a spaceship with a bunch of imposters, seriously i never cried in my entire life now I'm teary and on the verge of a break down.
talk with management "improving needs time" and offers me to join a yoga session to release the stress as if reaching nirvana would deliver shit on monday.
i really don't know what do is this a rant, is this a cry for help, I'm not sure, any advice is welcomed.7 -
Fuck my country's universities, fucking greedy assholes that ruin lives, suck wallets and sucks life from the young.
I'm currently studying something completely non related to programming: History. And I really love it. I love reading 1000 pages for each test and essay and talking about the problem of naming the Cold War a war and cold and etc. The problem is that I won't make as much money as I would make even as a self taught developer.
After considering my possibilities, I thought I could enter the computer science carreer. I don't know how this works in other countries but here you would have to study 3 years of an engineering common plan and then specialise in some sort of industrial engineering while getting an specialisation also in computer science. After some counting, I got to the conclusion that I would be studying 6 years (or more), and wasting half of those years learning stuff that I would never use nor care about.
But that's not all. This semester I took the introductory class for programming. It's pretty basic stuff but at least they teach a little bit about algorithms and problem solving. It turns out that a friend of mine that's about to graduate from computer science applied as a helper for the prof. I was so excited I could finally talk with someone about code!
Since the start of the semester I have been passing a lot of time with him and talking about the future. Turns out he doesn't understand shit about code but somehow he learns everything by hard and has passed every computer science course without having any practical abilities. I don't blame him, he's studying hard and playing by the rules, and turns out that he has wasted precious time of his life also learning biology, chemistry, structural engineering, hidraulic engineering, transportation engineering and a ton of engineerings that he won't use.
If the university would instead take that time to teach better courses of practical programming or leave him some time to try out the stuff he learns by hard, he wouldn't have to hear me talking about stuff he doesn't comprehend but feels that should, and wouldn't be utterly depressed, he wouldn't take SIX years to learn less than what he could learn in less than THREE years. And this isn't just a random university, it is one of the 2 best universities we have here and was in 2014 the best of all Latin America.
And wait, here comes the best part. In my country, levels of education are heavily stratified. After school, superior studies give different titles according to the time you've been studying. Yes just the time. And these titles are what your employers will see to give you different work positions. So for studying a 2 year carreer you get a technic job which pays well but not too well, then at 4 years you get a license title which only proves that you know stuff, then at 5 or more (depending on what you are studying) you get a professional degree and will get payed as a full fledged professional. So here, even though in other countries it takes 6 years to have a masters in engineering, they give you just the engineering degree, and it would take 2 (or more) more years to have a master. Even though you can totally teach engineering in 4 years, here they take BY LAW 2 years more, while paying what a fucking full stack of pairs of kidneys would cost in the black market.
So fuck that shit, I won't be throwing my money at any university. I hope they get reformed soon becouse this is fucking dumb, really really dumb. Like 2 year old shit dumb. I'll just learn a bit more, make some projects until I have a decent portfolio and apply to some company that cares for real knowledge and not just a piece of paper with letters and a shitty logo on it.11 -
seconds into 2019
I see one incompetent fucker asking to eval in Node.js..
A FUCKING FETCH OF A NPM MODULES IN CDNJS
you know what's the reason?
node_modules
Fucking kill me unless you're some dumb bitch who uses npm modules like some braindead motherfucker who doesn't know what a number is, node_modules takes only an average of 3.6MB
Compared to RubyGems who takes 40+
Or Pip
Seriously stop this. I wanna hang myself because my 2019 put me in a shit mood1 -
Samsung Smart TV becomes Samsung Dumb TV.
Welcome back dear readers, to the next installment of my Raspberry Pi / Pi Hole / MitM box adventure!
For those of you who are new to this story, I'm a long experience programmer who knows very little about his home network or networking in general and has constantly been going over his 250GB data plan because 'rona, and thus, wants answers to "where is the data going".
So, I got the Pi, codenamed Mini-Beowolf, positioned between the modem and router... worked some fuckin systemd.networkd magic (which was sort of easy... but was hard cause I'm new to it) and viola, this son of a bitch passes through the ethernet and doesn't even show up on the router. Fu-King Beastly, I love it.
Now to static IP all my devices so I fire up my trusty TP-Link admin portal. I should add here... I've visited this admin about a total of 10 minutes prior to this when I set this wifi router up and just let it do DHCP.
So I'm getting to know my admin portal... I've got most of my devices connected to reserved IPs... and I find this one fuckin device reporting as "localhost".
Now, I've got a MAMP install... but it hasn't been running. But still I thought for sure it was just MAMP run a bit amok.
But no... it was my fucking Samsung "Smart" TV. That piece of shit is, and apparently has been reporting its device name as, sure as shit, fucking "localhost"... PROBABLY FOR YEARS.
Now, IDK how that didn't cause me any major problems over the years, and I read quite a few forums about people who it did mess up their network. So I resolved to rename the Samsung TV device.
I found the spot in the network settings of the TV... I changed the name from the pick list of rooms in a house like "Living Room" and "Bed Room", then I tried entering my own device name. But no matter what I picked, or no matter how many times I restarted/reset that TV the network name is ALWAYS "localhost".
Even though somehow my network survived this long... I'm not standing for that shit.
My Samsung TV is now blocked COMPLETELY at the router level. (After I ran one last factory reset and update)
The kicker? That Pi I built has a Samsung SSD... so I'm blocking Samsung WITH FUCKING SAMSUNG.
Needless to say, these are likely among my last Samsung purchases.
Join me next time when I FINALLY try to turn Pi Hole on and then get a tcpdump (or some other lesser output from the tcp stream) going.16 -
That's it, where do I send the bill, to Microsoft? Orange highlight in image is my own. As in ownly way to see that something wasn't right. Oh but - Wait, I am on Linux, so I guess I will assume that I need to be on internet explorer to use anything on microsoft.com - is that on the site somewhere maybe? Cause it looks like hell when rendered from Chrome on Ubuntu. Yes I use Ubuntu while developing, eat it haters. FUCK.
This is ridiculous - I actually WANT to use Bing Web Search API. I actually TRIED giving up my email address and phone number to MS. If you fail the I'm not a robot, or if you pass it, who knows, it disappears and says something about being human. I'm human. Give me free API Key. Or shit, I'll pay. Client wants to use Bing so I am using BING GODDAMN YOU.
Why am I so mad? BECAUSE THIS. Oauth through github, great alternative since apparently I am not human according to microsoft. Common theme w them, amiright?
So yeah. Let them see all my githubs. Whatever. Just GO so I can RELAX. Rate limit fuck shit workaround dumb client requirements google can eat me. Whats this, I need to show my email publicly? Verification? Sure just go. But really MS, this looks terrible. If I boot up IE will it look any better? I doubt it but who knows I am not looking at MS CSS. I am going into my github, making it public. Then trying again. Then waiting. Then verifying my email is shown. Great it is hello everyone. COME ON MS. Send me an email. Do something.
I am trying to be patient, but after a few minutes, I revoke access. Must have been a glitch. Go through it again, with public email. Same ugly almost invisible message. Approaching a billable hour in which I made 0 progress. So, lets just see, NO EMAIL from MS, Yes it appears in my GitHub, but I have no way to log into MS. Email doesnt work. OAuth isn't picking it up I guess, I don't even care to think this through.
The whole point is, the error message was hard to discover, seems to be inaccurate, and I can't believe the IRONY or the STUPIDITY (me, me stupid. Me stupid thinking I could get working doing same dumb thing over and over like caveman and rock).
Longer rant made shorter, I cant come up with a single fucking way to get a free BING API Key. So forget it MS. Maybe you'll email me tomorrow. Maybe Github was pretending to be Gitlab for a few minutes.
Maybe I will send this image to my client and tell him "If we use Bing, get used to seeing hard to read error messages like this one". I mean that's why this is so frustrating anyhow - I thought the Google CSE worked FINE for us :/
-
I'm very short tempered at the moment.
A lot like Dr Cox in Scrubs.
And really ... You mother fucking stupid idiotic developers with your tendency to discuss absolutely everything just to not have to work for a dozen more minutes...
But ok. Let's discuss.
But even that seems to be absolutely impossible for you little shitheads.
Instead of discussing solutions, nooooooooo....
We're grown up developers so we discuss how the baddy manager hurt our lil feelings by saying that we're morons for wasting all the fucking time without coming up with a solution.
Now my lil cry babies, once the baddy manager got your pacifiers so at least once in an hour my migraine finally calms down for not hearing your bitching pathetic lil whiny noises...
Face it. Over the years you collected a huge ton of mother fucking tech debt because no one of you actually took a bit of time to use that empty space in your head to think at least a mu further than the dumb jira task you were given.
And yes. That ends badly.
And yes. As it is now in a state of cluster fuck, guess what. You have to work. You get money for it, remember?
And yes. if you would stop moping and bitching and crying and being a pathetic lil piece of shit, you'd realize we could come up with solutions very fast.
But nooo... Let's talk about our feelings.
And how we are over worked.
And how nothing works.
Cause yes. That will be the hail mary that saves us all.
Let me give u a hint: it's a mother fucking waste of time bitches.
I think it's time I put a pacifier not only in your mouth, but arse too. Maybe it helps overcoming the anal and oral phase of childhood so we can at least have something close to adult talk.
*breathes in*
Gooozfraba.3 -
Someone created a 0-followers private Twitter account and posted something to try out the new views count feature.
It raked dozens of views in a couple hours.
HOW?!?
Source: https://twitter.com/briggityboppity...
It looks like a funny data reverse-engineering exercise, so let's try and figure out what is going on.
Hypothesis 1) it is the OP's own views.
Reasonable, but unlikely if what OP says about not checking it for hours is true.
H2) It's some background job in OP's device that is refreshing OP's own latest tweets, so even without human interaction technically H1 is true. It would be some really shoddy engineering to count eye-less page views, but that's also what managers would demand.
H3) it's some internal Twitter automated function like back up, replication, indexing and word count.
See H2, it would be even dumber to count that as page views.
H4) it's some internal human reviewing for a keyword that could be associated with porn (in this case, "butts"). Really? dozens of humans to review a no-impact single post? They would have to employ hundreds of thousands of reviewers.
H5) it's some page-loading shit, like thousands of similar tweets get stored in the same index hash page and end up counting as a view in all of them every time someone loads the index page. It would be like counting every hit in the namenode as a hit in every data asset in it's Hadoop partition, or every hit in a storage block as a hit in each of it's files.
Duuuumb and kinda like H3.
H6) page views are just a fraud to scam investors. Maybe it's a "most Blockchain transactions are fake" situation, maybe it's a "views get more engagement if you don't think a lot about it" situation, maybe it's a "we don't use the metric system to count page views" situation.
All of them are very dumb.
Other hypothesis or opinions?10 -
daily reminder (most of you don't need it i know) that reddit is full of the most ignorant and dumb people on the planet
thought i could hop into comments on a /r/worldnews post for interesting discussion and discourse, no, its just idiotic neckbeards trying to one up eachother on painfully cringe doomer phrases and / or who can get the most upvotes from their godawful dumbass pun
what a fuckin cesspool
and they wonder why the world is going to shit7 -
Why do companies feel its ok to put dumb crap like this when their services go down? Shit like "oopsies" or "Oh no" doesn't make your users feel better about your shitty service.
Btw this is from Mixpanel, who I wish we hadn't chosen as our analytics platform.
-
Piece of shit shitware called visual studio, I only need you because of that stupid vcvarsall.dll, so I gave you a folder on my HDD, but nooo, You just had to ignore this and place yourself on my SSD. My poor SSD that has very little space left.
Fuck you visual studio. To me you are a literal waste of Time, Space and Sanity2 -
give up on working hard
doesn't mean shit in the long run
it only matters who you can bullshit and how much money they have
*really* i mean this
at this point i've seen it so many times, and i thought the world couldn't be this dumb... but somehow that's really how it all works, there's really no secret
much better to just have had internship at some silicon valley company - their for loops, functional code, and abstracted classes are far better than the ones anywhere else, don't you know?
just wish the world would grow the fuck up, but alas, they have to remain wimpy kiddy caveman mentality style5 -
The reason for half the web-dev world sufferings is that Microsoft won't stop choking their users with explorer or edge, and half of the client are too dumb or lazy to download a different browser to test stuff. Fuck this shit man! Nothing works the way it should on this bitch.
Everytime my manager says- It should work perfectly on IE because client doesn't have any other browser, I curse IE for exisiting. If you can't improve it, just remove it you freakin' sadists. It'll not be an embarrassment to load something better on your OS. If anything, it'll get people to like you maybe. Like you for accepting your fuckery and making a decision in favor of the web dev world and innocent windows users, who only use your explorer to download other browser asap. For just that one time and for all your arrogance, you're making the whole world suffer.2 -
FUCK WORDPRESS
FUCK WORDPRESS
FUCK WORDPRESS
FUCK WORDPRESS
FUCK WORDPRESS
Who the fuck thought "Oh lets put all caches in the options table". This is so incredible dumb. The options table has nearly 8GB and is just unusable. The query for the "real options" takes about 3s. To export this fucking shit I had to block the prod server for 20 minutes to get a db dump. I want to womit in the mouth of the fucking idiot who did this.6 -
I am pulling my hair out on ducking low level stuff. This is why people (more importantly me!) should have the chance to learn, rather than assume how things work.
Has anyone of you detailed resources on how linking objects into shared libraries really works ? Especially Name Resolution. All those ducking tutorials and bloody blog post just have simple examples and explain shit not in detail!
Even ducking man pages on gcc/ld don’t help me out! Maybe I’m too dumb to type the right words into me search engine. I’d even love to read a bloody paper book.16 -
These ignorant comments about arch are starting to get on my nerves.
You ranted or asked help about something exclusive to windows and someone pointed out they don't have that problem in arch and now you're annoyed?
Well maybe it's for good.
Next comes a very rough analogy, but imagine if someone posts "hey guys, I did a kg of coke and feeling bad, how do I detox?"
It takes one honest asshole to be like "well what if you didn't do coke?".
Replace the coke with windows.
Windows is a (mostly) closed source operating system owned by a for profit company with a very shady legal and ethical history.
What on earth could possibly go wrong?
Oh you get bsod's?
The system takes hours to update whenever the hell it wants, forces reboot and you can't stop it?
oh you got hacked because it has thousands of vulnerabilities?
wannacry on outdated windows versions paralyzed the uk health system?
oh no one can truly scrutinize it because it's closed source?
yet you wonder why people are assholes when you mention it? This thing is fucking cancer, it's hundreds of steps backwards in terms of human progress.
and one of the causes for its widespread usage are the savage marketing tactics they practiced early on. just google that shit up.
but no, linux users are assholes out to get you.
and how do people react to these honest comments? "let's make a meme out of it. let's deligitimize linux, linux users and devs are a bunch of neckbeards, end of story, watch this video of rms eating skin off his foot on a live conference"
short minded idiots.
I'm not gonna deny the challenges or limitations linux represents for the end user.
It does take time to learn how to use it properly.
Nvidia sometimes works like shit.
Tweaking is almost universally required.
A huge amount of games, or Adobe/Office/X products are not compatible.
The docs can be very obscure sometimes (I for one hate a couple of manpages)
But you get a system that:
* Boots way faster
* Is way more stable
* Is way way way more secure.
* Is accountable, as in, no chance to being forced to get exploited by some evil marketing shit.
In other words, you're fucking free.
You can even create your own version of the system, with total control of it, even profit with it.
I'm not sure the average end user cares about this, but this is a developer forum, so I think in all honesty every developer owes open source OS' (linux, freebsd, etc) major respect for being free and not being corporate horseshit.
Doctors have a hippocratic oath? Well maybe devs should have some form of oath too, some sworn commitment that they will try to improve society.
I do have some sympathy for the people that are forced to use windows, even though they know ideally isn't the ideal moral choice.
As in, their job forces it, or they don't have time or energy to learn an alternative.
At the very least, if you don't know what you're talking about, just stfu and read.
But I don't have one bit of sympathy for the rest.
I didn't even talk about arch itself.
Holy fucking shit, these people that think arch is too complicated.
What in the actual fuck.
I know what the problem is, the arch install instructions aren't copy paste commands.
Or they medium tutorial they found is outdated.
So yeah, the majority of the dev community is either too dumb or has very strong ADD to CAREFULLY and PATIENTLY read through the instructions.
I'll be honest, I wouldn't expect a freshman to follow the arch install guide and not get confused several times.
But this is an intermediate level (not megaexpert like some retards out there imply).
Yet arch is just too much. That's like saying "omg building a small airplane is sooooo complicated". Yeah well it's a fucking aerial vehicle. It's going to be a bit tough. But it's nowhere near as difficult as building a 747.
So because some devs are too dumb and talk shit, they just set the bar too low.
Or "if you try to learn how to build a plane you'll grow an aviator neckbeard". I'll grow a fucking beard if I want too.
I'm so thankful for arch because it has a great compromise between control and ease of install and use.
When I have a fresh install I only get *just* what I fucking need, no extra bullshit, no extra programs I know nothing about or need running on boot time, and that's how I boot way faster that ubuntu (which is way faster than windows already).
Configuring nvidia optimus was a major pain in the ass? Sure was, but I got it work the way I wanted to after some time.
Upgrading is also easy as pie, so really scratching my brain here trying to understand the real difficult of using arch.22 -
Fucking shit for brains authors that think the digital world is a fantasy realm where everything can happen just to aid their story. Out of boredom i watched "scorpion" today, a tv series about a group of geniusses which are a special case task force.
They got a visitor from the government saying the servers from the federal reserve bank were encrypted with ransomware. I already twitched when they said the economic system would collapse if the servers were left inoperational for a few days. Then one guy got to his desk and "hacked" the fed network to check... he then tried to remove the malware but "it changed itself when observed". But they got the magical fingerprint of the device that uploaded it. In the end some non-programmers created the malware, but it is super fast and dangerous because it runs on a quantum computer which makes it hyper fast and dangerous. They got to the quantum computer which was a glowing cube inside another cube with lasers going into it and they had to use mirrors to divert the lasers to slow down that quantum thingy. And be careful with that, otherwise it explodes. In the end the anti-malware battled the malware and won, all in a matter of minutes.
This is a multimillion hollywood production. How can a movie this abusive to computer science even air on television? Shit like this is the reason people still think the cyberworld is some instable thing that can explode any second. It's not, it's an instable thing that can break down any second. I remember "ghost in the wires" and people had surreal imaginations about the internet already. Shit like this is why people stay dumb and think everything can be done in seconds. If i ever should encounter one of these idiots i tell him i have an app that can publish his browser history by taking a picture of his phone and watch his reaction.
Time to shuw down the tv and learn vim again.11 -
I've been working like a mad woman in a startup for 3+ years now. They feel like 10. Or at least the tech stacks we went through.
Never, ever join a startup, regardless of compensation, unless you know you can emotionally and mentally recover from that startup failing as if it is yours, not your bosses. Otherwise, it's just a shitty short experience.
My long experience is shitty, but man. I don't know.Those who built google, wanted to make a search engine. Did they know they're gonna be good? NO. This is the result of them being good. They now have that great product that succeeds and is able to become a self-referential piggy bank. You cannot be a self-referential piggy bank based on a fucking belief and idea, and a bunch of VCs who already put money in you. You know why? BECAUSE GUESS WHO IS THE ONE RESPONSIBLE FOR SUSTAINING YOUR START UP NOW?
The bloods and passions of youth, that join your startup, thinking they can make a difference, and you just undermine them constantly thinking that no engineer can make a difference if they can't ensure compliance with your dumb funding strategy.
Don't even get me started on the fact that most people who work for startups, rely on either laziness or passion. It's like a bunch of kids in art school, whose professor doesn't like anything they make, but they still kinda like it hoping one day they leave and become artists themselves. Then they discover that this shit professor actually taught them nothing about creativity in the real world, and what it takes to push something out.
And, it finally fucking hit me.
The reason startups will never work in this year, and beyond, AND TILL I SEE A CHANGE IN ATTITUDE IN 10 YEARS.....
The market won't fucking allow it with the current strategy tech companies are a fan of: hire a bunch of passionate devs who wanna learn a tool through doing our unique work. Doesn't matter. DIVERSITY. THE UNION IS THE PASSION. That's dumb as fuck.
Why?
Here:
- Passionate people do not have to use passion as an incentive, the passion was there, and them getting their idea made or money is the incentive
- If you hire a passionate person - even if they are the fucking best - you just made their passion a tool, in getting your PRs done and shit epics scoped AT BEST, and so the tools you're teaching them to use are getting away with doing less impactful, productive, creative work.
I AM SO DEPRESSED.3 -
Wow man. Can the day get any worse
Mother fucker creator of Android. Now I'm A long time android user, but
Android+Snapdragon 6XX chip+Moto= worst combo ever. Damn you creators, may You be deepfucked by a mad bison in heat. Cocksuckers.
The heat my Moto X play generates, I could make an omelette on top of it. And the newest feature, where you try to type, but you can't see anything happening, when 30 secs later, you suddenly start seeing the after images of all the buttons you pressed, all the text you typed. Why maybe I typed at the speed of light and android couldn't keep up. No.
NO! You dumb fuckin POS. NO. I threw my phone 20ft, broke the tempered glass. The case protected this shit. Once I can save enough, I'll either sell a kidney and get an iPhone or even better a OP5.
Nothing disgusts me more than slow hardware.12 -
All i want to do is write code. Give me time, space, and stop bothering me so often and I can fix the shitty outsourced code. I can do it, really. I can write a ton of resdesign docs and improve so much shit. But I can't do ANY OF IT BECAUSE THESE FUCKS ARE ALWAYS PAWNING OFF WORK ONTO ME AND REFUSING TO LET ME GET MY HANDS DIRTY.
Stop asking me to email people. Stop asking me to update documentation that isn't for my features. Stop bothering me. Stop. Fucking. Bothering. Me. All. The. Goddamn. Damn.
Stop it stop it stop it fucking stop. I don't care about the PM's dumbfuck braindead statements and always wanting to pick a fight with me. I don't care that x environment is down. I don't care that your shitty overseas programmers can't tell their own ass from their head. I do care that I have the skills to fix it if you would give me the fucking time and space.
Instead of having me do all the mundane tasks that your shitty ape programmers could do overseas, let me have some fucking room to breath and I can fix this shitty fuck of a project and Maybe I can save it before it collapses on itself you dumb fucks
Holy shit im pissy today4 -
5000 scss file with the name global.scss styling.
How fucking dumb can you be to fucking mess up a clean component based architecture like Foundation or Bootstrap and fill it with shit in a single file.
No wonder WP gets shit. The legacy code is usually shit.
And to put the shit cherry on top. This motherfucker had a settings.scss file with all general components and he never used it.
Fucker put different font size in px everywhere! Fucking asshole!!! -
Why the *fuck* did Facebook decide to nag users by constantly reminding them of how dumb and miserable they are by showing the old-ass posts from years and years ago?? I don't want to see some random shotpost i posted 5 years ago, i don't give a fuck!!
How the hell uses this anyway? Who on earth cares about his facebook image so much, that sharing this stuff is actually meaningful?
Maybe i'm missing a point, but again my facebook profile is just a wall of memes and vapid shit that i don't care about.
I'm starting to really fucking hate facebook in every way, too bad its the only real way to contact people here in scandinavia...
This country is full of applefags anyway, maybe i should just pack up and move to a country with a more sensible communication platform :D7 -
What do you do when your client WANTS a shitty website?
If it's considered a UI anti-pattern, he wants it.
I'm pretty frustrated because I keep bringing him what I consider professional-quality work and he's disappointed, asks for something dumb instead. I made the mistake of giving him Photoshop and encouraging him to try to design some of his ideas. I thought he would be frustrated and decide, okay, Patrick knows best. But that backfired. Now I'm forced to answer basic questions about "how to delete the pixels" and end up on TeamViewer for hours trying to explain vector masks.
His current bright idea is to advertise his product with a comic strip. And let me tell you, it looks really, really awful. Not tasteful material-design-esq vectors, he thinks those are dumb, he prefers crude clipart. But he loves it.
I've kind of dug myself a hole here. It's what the client wants. But the client wants a steaming pile of shit. What do I do? Also forgot to mention, dude is my landlord and I'm behind on rent. FML
pic related; it's his comic
4 -
Consecutive day number 3 of "What random dumb shit is Xcode going to pull on me today?"
today it doesn't like the ".storyboard" extension name that it created itself automatically. So that's my fault again I suppose?5 -
Follow up to previous rant:
Now after I realised that I'm a stupid motherfucker, today was release day. Or so it was planned.
Because turned out my colleagues/supervisors didn't tell me to test the app on Android 6 devices and I was sure that if it ran on the device they gave me (which I assumed was the only device of our clients) it'd be sufficient.
Now it was tested on an android 6 device and crashed constantly.
Wow... I mean... Just wow... Now because I don't have a working android 6 device (a colleague of mine is on vacation and locked our development devices for a different app into a drawer) I have to get the emulator working which took me about 2 hours because that dumb shit face of a laptop first didn't have the android-sdk-root set (took me a good hour to realise) and then the kernel for the avds was missing.
Also: windows updates.
FUUUUUUUUUUUU....
(PS: yeah I should have tested it on various devices and made sure it worked on at least most of them without being told so. Another example for my stupidity.)
EDIT: Now I don't have enough disc space for the kernel I need to install. Absofuckingfantastic1 -
Today a task was assigned to a coworker, he is a good guy, but one of those that never complain, never say anything, get there early, go to lunch at the exact same hour everyday, doesnt talk to anybody and gets off at exactly 6pm.
So, the task was submitted by QA, according to them, a disabled input could be enabled by going into the dev tools and enabling it...
So i went over the pm and told her (cos she is a cunt) that the ticket was just bullshit and that first of all, we had no control of it, but if that is the case, we can go over and add event listeners to all the inputs in the platform to avoid people changing them...like wtf?
Since she is a dumb cunt, she 'escalated' the task to the senior dev... he is also a total fucktard who doesnt know a shit. The dude said that the task was ok and we had to do it or not but it was better to do it, justifying the ticket in the most stupid and incoherent way... like wtf is to do with it? Tell the user to not go over the devtools and enable it? The fuckkkk
I felt like i was about to shit my kidney, seriously, but what can i do? It is not the first time things like that happen. The stupid fuck also let one of his friends add several migrations to change several tables columns just because of 'good practices' which in first place left the databas all fucked up and with fucked relations.
I'm just so tired of these fucks, incompetent motherfuckers... I told a friend about it and he said that that was nothing, it is worse when you have to work for banks and that the only thing i could do was to let it go and learn from it, to not do the same mistakes. Im thinking in quitting... what should i do?3 -
Dev: Woah look at this code! I might be a genius!
Also dev a few months later: Woah WTH is this shit? Was I totally dumb or what?2 -
CEO tells us to delete every Trello boards, and make a big smoking dump of shit of a Trello board out of them, by adding every project for every plaform there, because he is a control freak, and he NEEDS to see every project all in one, because he’s “tired” of switching between boards if he wants to see the completion of a project. Like duh, this is the job of our 2 PM’s, but whatever you dumb fuck. Chaos is coming.....i’m done4
-
When you realize that all those years using windows washed away all your knowledge about using Linux.
I feel like a dumb idiot now while struggling to get shit done on my newly installed mint distro. Younger, I used to read that very fat book my father had on his desk, with all the basics on Linux, I don't have it around anymore.
Any "up to date" good book or website of reference to refresh that rusty brain of mine?1 -
Linux mint is being a little shit. I can't safely eject my flash drive without "emptying the trash?!!!!" I don't remember if previous versions were more stable. This isn't the first time dumb shit stopped working. Should I install an old version or jump distros?12
-
The daily standup notes thing has now been moved to a shared Microsoft Word document, because OneNote is so shitty.
Another dev and I talked about building a web app to collect monday.com ticket updates for the day, so that the project manager person can just click a "Send email" button to send to management.
This shit is so annoying, the entire process. The note-taking is for management so they can know what we're up to. As far as I know, standup is not supposed to involve management at all, they should only be updated in sprint reviews, burndown charts, etc.
Why the fuck do we have to update our project management software, then talk about it for 30 minutes, and then again write it down in a dumb fucking Word document, just because management is too retarded to learn how to read a fucking kanban board?! They all have access to the monday.com boards. I'm sick of having to repeat myself day in and day out.
Why do we even have project management software?!
I hate Scrum. It is micromanagement.3 -
No Rant:
I guess I will start a religous discussion with it but I want your opinion on what tool I should learn.
Vim or Emacs (or stay with my IDE)?
For all of my programmer life I used IDEs... From Eclipse over CodeBlocks over VS to IntelliJ.
But now I realized that I want to be one of the cool kids. And using plain IntelliJ is uncool. No matter how much I love this tool.
So now I want to invest some time into learning. I never managed to do much in Vim since all code-completions sucked ass, feedback on syntax errors was bad and I never saw how I could be any faster with that shit compared to what IntelliJ does for me.
Will Emacs solve all those problems? Will Emacs make me code 1000 times faster and make having a mouse useless?
Or am I just too dumb for Vim? Can Vim itself do what my IDE does for me? Will it make me look as cool as I want to be?
Or should I stick to IntelliJ and just install Vim bindings?
What is your opinion on Vim vs Emacs vs any IDE?10 -
For the fucking millionth time!!!
Backup != slave-master replication you dumb fuck...
What the fuck is so hard to understand after countless explanations using fucking drawings and shit?
Wtf dude...6 -
I read the pragmatic programmer a few months ago. The book advised learning a different programming language every month or so. I was doing Advent of Code so I decided to try out Elm because functional programming is all the rage these days.
It took me one hour to convert a string of numbers to an array of numbers! And when I finally finished with that I couldn't understand how to compare each element with the next one in an array using map or filter.
I realised that I've become too comfortable using javascript. Worst case scenario: In a few years when javascript is obsolete I'll be like those old dudes that know only Cobol. Best case scenario: I'll always be too dumb to earn a nice salary.
On a positive note: The first time I tried Elm I didn't understand jack shit, now I understood a few things.5 -
Met one of my friends after almost three months. (He was out on vacation)
We randomly start talking about life and what we aspire to be.
He's doing Business Management Studies, so naturally, he wants to be some sort of manager.
He then asks about me. I tell him how I'm learning and aspiring to be a Web dev and do a little bit of ML on the side.
And following conversation ensues:
Him- Dude, what's the use of learning web development? Anyone can make a website today. Haven't you seen those ads?
Me- *Knowing he's talking about WIX* Yeah I've seen em. But it mostly generates dumb templates. If you need something custom, you gotta take help from a professional.
Him - Nah dude, you can get custom made stuff from them too. Web developers will soon lose their jobs. Learn something else.
Me - *Trying to control the urge to punch, I tried to explain that a website is more than HTML and CSS*
He - *Doesn't want to understand what I'm saying and says I should do something else, since automation will take away developer jobs *
WHAT THE FLYING SPAGHETTI FUCK!?
Why don't these people FUCKING UNDERSTAND (even after telling again and again) that there's more to a website THAN JUST FUCKING STATIC TEMPLATES
EAT SHIT AND DIE YOU FUCKING BASTARDS
And what's with claiming to know more about someone's profession than the person himself who's spending his days and nights dealing with problems your fucking zombie brains can't even fathom.
This was literally the third guy I met this month who said something similar. Are these people so common now?2 -
Some of my co-workers are so fucking dumb. Their thought process....
Let's re-run tests that are currently failing over and over until it works
😡
like bitch....fix it then run it! don't just run shit over and over to make yourself look busy.1 -
Why the f*ck do you want custom cursor on the site? It's annoying when suddenly your cursor changes from default. If that's not enough they are increasing size by 2-3 times. I understand if it's a gaming site or web game but why do you want to put this crap on a business site? No need to change the cursor for branding. That's stupid.2
-
Dear Facebook.
FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING CUNTS.
The next time you upgrade your piece of shit application on iOS and remove stuff from their place which makes me search all the way your crap battery vacuum application until i fuckin find it i will come to your office find that dumb zuckerberk and push the fuckin chair he sits at down to his throat.
Same goes for your retarded website.
Suckers.1 -
Many "purists" love to piss on JavaScript and web development. And to an extent I can understand ostream’s frustration with these people.
It’s easy to criticize because yes: many web projects are indeed shit.
But I’d like to argue that the reason why so many of these projects are crappy is because of bad management:
- unrealistic deadlines
- no clear testing strategy
- or no testing at all because of deadlines
- no time allotted to catch up on technical debt
- etc.
This type of management is far more commonplace in web projects because things need to get delivered quickly and if they’re delivered with bugs, it’s no big deal as lives aren’t at stake.
I doubt this type of management is tolerated in projects where you’re working on software for welding machines (for example), where the stakes are that "you’re expected not to kill anyone" (to quote demolishun)
So in these types of projects, management can’t tolerate anything much below perfection and thus has to adapt by setting realistic deadlines that take into account the need for quality processes and thorough testing.
If this type of management was more common in web development, I can guarantee that web applications would be much more reliable and of better quality.
I can also guarantee that poorly managed non-web projects as outlined above would be just shitty as many web products.
My point being that’s it’s really DUMB to criticize fellow devs that work with web technologies on the basis that the state of websites/web apps is a mess. It just so happens that JS is the language of the web and that the web is where things are expected to be delivered quickly (and dirty … but we can fix it later mentality)
Stop acting like you’re the elite. I have no doubt you’re super smart and great at what you do. So be smart all the way and stop criticizing us poor webdevs that have to live with the sad state of affairs. ❤️38 -
Brazilian health ministry got a ransomware attack this night.
Why? Not because every city is demanding you to show you're vaccinated in order to go somewhere. Because you have to show it using a 20+ year old system.
Don't get me wrong the UI is nice.
But the servers...
Well, at least I have a document where my shots are registered.
And good luck to us living in this country, where we're known for gorgeous cities (people too) but also for a government that earns 200k+ while working 2 days a week and can employee 40+ people for sitting there and do no fucking shit.
No wonder if you get bad news from here every now and then, it's all true.
The ministries are dumb.
The president is dumb.
And worst. People too.
People don't care. Because they don't know they are part of 94% of more than 200 MILLION that earns minimum wage and strive to live bc the country BUYS things that we ALREADY PRODUCE and have to put a tax to every product to compensate them paying 5x times more to buy in dollars.
Well,
At least I'm not depending on this sucker of government, never cared about it.
You guys deserve to collapse and become poor again
6 -
Oh shit it's a !rant, if you don't like !rants then scroll past this please.
When out of all my dumb classmates there's actually one that never learned much about programming before going to my school, got interested and is right now developing a library of CLI games... Of course I help him if he has any questions, and I will probably review his code after he's done.6 -
Imagine seeing words like developer:ess, member:esses or user:ess in artices on the web becoming more and more popular.
Pretty dumb, yes?
That’s what happening right now with the German language with something called gender-language.
It hurts my eyes reading Entwickler:innen, Mitglieder:innen and Benutzer:innen.
People argue that words like Entwickler are excluding woman by using the male form by default. But it’s just a matter of perspective. Why not just define this as the neutral form just like in english? Developer is neither male nor female. Everybody is fine with that.
Yet the Germans are messing around with this gender shit and making text unreadable for no reason at all.
It’s just bullshit!19 -
Today's episode of Bluey is called: "I am not ready to go back to work after a week long mandatory vacation in which I will go back into a space that has made my passion into a shitless grabs for money"
Seriously, If I hear "the president of the institution does not like <X>" I will blow my brains out.
What is worse, every "leAderShiP" meeting I ask if shit is actually a policy towards were my department head says "no, but the boss does not like <X>" <--- then fucking make it a policy.
Seriously, I have a wife, I have but one woman to keep happy, I ain't about to break my back on dumb shit that some lady dislikes when I already have to keep 1 woman happy.
Going to work is a paycheck to me, but fuck man, I am seriously leaving. Good luck trying to find fkers this part of town that can patch my software be it that I wrote it in the most esoteric shit known to mankind on these modern days.
Might start listening to recruiters, I get about 50 offers a day.1 -
Well... instead of imposter syndrome I think I have something more alike "I can't fucking tell if I'm smarter than everyone around me or if I'm so dumb I have no clue what's going on"-syndrome.
And trying to be rational, I usually consider the second option to be more probabile... right?
Or maybe, the way my brain processes things is just so different from the people I know that It creates a layer of incomunicability, so that others can't understand my reasoning as much as I can't understand theirs.
The usual speaking-through-jargon-all-the-time trend I've encountered is also not helping.
So I strive daily to align myself to what's going on, trying not to slow anybody down, but that drains my mental energies so much I end up getting done so little... and then I realize _everybody_ has done a similar amount of work.
Are maybe my standards too high?
Or it's normal for teamwork to slow everybody down THIS much?
I used to work much better alone, or in teams with proper separation of tasks between people. Like - we agree on a common interface and then everybody goes his own way implementing his part, and as long as the contract is respected and nothing breaks, nobody cares about what's inside the boxes.
But I don't see it coming again anytime soon, and people seem to have an averagely-good opinion of my work. So well, if I get paid and things cruise along fine, there should be nothing to complain about.
Shit, I've let my flow of consciousness out.2 -
WHY THE FUCK THE NEED TO USE Visual Studio.
Well, in my university, for some fuckin dumb reason we are taught to develop a simple fuckin web form in asp.net.
Thing is, VS is so fuckin powerful that it's a huge overkill for such a simple thing. What is even worse is that, WE DONT FUCKIN EVEN CODE IN C# we just drag FUCKIN COMPONENTS HERE AND THERE without learning a single thing
But okay let's move on. I'm a linux guy, which mean, I CANT FUCKIN USE VS AND CANT EVEN PRACTICE THOSE DUMB SHITS and that means i won't fuckin remember a single thing.
FUCK THIS SHIT2 -
My Boss Abuses me, should I leave my job?
I overheard this tidbit on a bus recently. Okay I'm lying. But in the great spans of
time I've spent reading "dear annie" type articles, many involving how often my meth head step dads beat me while growing up, or in turn how often *I* beat me (oh yeah)..I've come across this in one form another, this, and other dumbfuck questions from the stuttering meek and halfhearted.
They say there are no dumb questions. Well, like that guy who smoked too much weed and
asked "what is the sound of one hand clapping?" (fap fap fap), there are in fact dumb questions.The world is overflowing with them, like a clogged shitter full of tacobell and glitter covered brown gutter wisdom. And it smells like roses, if roses smelled like shit.
Questions like "How do I make sure my cats don't feel lonely once I have my first child?"
I don't know, they're fucking cats. Did you even google this before asking?
Or
"How to make spaghetti?"
Really, is this question written by a bot?
"What is the best javascript framework in year x?"
All of them and none of them. Welcome to hell.
"Whats your favorite color?"
My answer: I'm not five years old any more. And obviously you are. Why are you on this site instead of eating crayons at daycare?
Yes indeed, this and many more dumbfuck questions await you and can be found on the preeminent quora, amongst other sites.
A place, which censored an eminently reasonable answer of mine (I was totally not being a shithead btw).
I responded in kind by removing a whole mess of long form answers of mine.
What I have learned from the experience is this: Humanity is greatly comprised of many people who, having no brains to speak of, wander aimlessly like beasts of the field, glass eyed and slack jawed, in search of a savior. But their savior came a long time ago, once, and many times before. An engineer, or programmer, or perhaps in another reincarnation a guy parting a sea of koolaid after the local ruler swindled his peeps out of another payment for moving some heavy ass stone blocks, but I digress.
And in response to peoples worries, anxieties, everyday problems and concerns, every one of these would be wiseman, every one of these saviors, leaders, and great men spoke these magic words which resonate now down through the ages like the voice of reason and providence:
"Read the FUCKING manual."
"And don't bother me again asshole." (well this last bit is all me, but I'm sure others said it too.)2 -
I fucking hate Google, but made the decision to use it as my primary search engine once again.
Reality dictates that I have already adopted it for well over a decade via searches since AllTheWeb existed along with owning enough Android devices to choke a twelve headed dragon whore.
But, here's the main reason: You.com and DuckDuckGo are so dumb as fuck, they might as well be Ron Jeremy's MySpace page.
You.com, for instance, is "completely customizable" by adding un-customizable "apps" without any control over the content it spews into your SERPS.
Neither seems to have interest in no longer padding results with shit you'd take a knife to. At least Google allows me to block those pages or sites from being seen again.
If you happen to live on Planet Earth (which currently seems to exclude 86.8% of the human population) you've been tracked before you even knew what "Big Brother" meant.
If you're looking to safeguard your security, buy a goddamn sword and time travel to remove the Zuckerberg timeline from existence.22 -
I fucking hate Halloween costume stress, I am so fucking dumb that I can’t think of anything to dress as. I might just stay home tbh bc fuck all of this shit.14
-
So, I fixed this shitty code, real shitty, inlined some shit and shaved off some other shit and it was fixed...
The reviewer says we'd better request a review from the dude that's actually responsible for that piece of shit code - what the fuck...
Here comes this bossy fucker saying they don't really understand that shit so they don't know for sure if there could be a better way...
Me, ignorant as always, popped a vessel figuring out a cleaner way.
I tell those sick fucks that we'd need to change some shit over at another repository, also maintained by the latter turd.
The latter turd says they like my second suggestion better, to which I reply,
'ok, I agree.'
In my mind that pull was done, should be closed and water under the bridge but oh how clueless I was...
SIX FUCKING MONTHS later the same shitbag pops out of god knows where asking if I still wanted to work on the pull....
"Motherfucker, my pull was for this fucking code, not for doing work on the other, obviously I'm not interested in doing that or else I would've opened a pull there instead of here, dumb-dumb" - I thought
Thou what I said was:
"No, I don't. I agree it's a problem better solved at the other repository."
Maybe I was a bit mean, was I? I don't know, honestly, people confuse me2 -
My past 16hours activities
Woke up > destroyed a healthy running environment while trying to setup dual monitor on my manjaro kde > found out the nvidia driver was the culprit the whole the > the whole thing was a PITA > reinstalled the kde with windows dual boot > did the previous task 4/5 times till I felt satisfied ( call be a dumb but it is what it is ) > and now after wasting the whole fucking day I am setting up the environment finally.
Still I'm not sure if I'll be able to finish this shit before 4 am in the morning . It's now 1.26 AM .
Life is an interesting loop of hell .4 -
Windows piece of shit mother fucker useless trash.
Why can't I just compile without the dumb ass "Antimalware Service Executable" having to check every single fucking file and eating fucking 4GB ram. God damn it. fiadsfleaf oaiehjf afpo jafj
I start compiling binutils and then the whole thing fucking crashes ad;adsfjhc odshfaj;sdl hfja;odsfh;osa dhif;aosdhfi a;osdihf;skdjnvba; dsjch;soduf;dsao fu;nodjf ;anaod11 -
Searching how to (insert dev related skill) then after that getting only adds shown for places that do professional dev work. No, obviously I am trying to learn the shit myself not willing to pay someone else, in fact add a sync my bank account to search just so google can comeback with results filed under you are too poor to pay for shit here are the diy results you poor dumb fuck using free wifi. :)
-
There are days I imagine what my life would be like as a farmer instead of being a developer.
Two major sets of fully manual tests due on one day, after I've been alone in the office for two weeks handling all development, testing and support requests; inbox full of dumb questions that are answered in docs; people at my desk asking for shit that won't get done; and although the other devs are all back, one is "working" from home, one has no permissions to SVN, and the other is still learning how to do anything useful.
To top it all off, I've a meeting in twenty minutes, and I've managed to get coffee on my shirt and in my ear buds in a curious incident involving my headphones getting dunked in my coffee and going towards me at high speed.
Oh, and my wife just called saying the baby is screaming like a banshee at home, so I have that to look forward to.
Ugh...2 -
I don’t give a fuck about crypto currency, bitcoin and all the shit. I don’t even want to know how it works.
I’m an arrogant or dumb ??
Roast me.10 -
I am fucking dumb, why I've created an empty project to implement the new feature instead of making a fucking local branch. Now I need to merge this shit manually. fuck fuck fuck5
-
I'm just joining this field, and already I hate it when family ask what exactly I'm learning.
I can either dumb it down to the old "I make computer go beep beep" and get met with accusations of rudeness, tell the full details and have them look lost, or try and dumb it down and get met with patronizing remarks ("Oh yeah, I remember doing that last Thrusday! Sure, yeah!).
How do you explain this shit to your folks?9 -
I was in charge of updating the dependencies on a microservice we have. Everything was at least 3 years old. Nice. How bad was it gonna be?
Jesus Christ, I have never felt so wrong.
A certain dependency I will hide under the name w******js allowed custom functions for a feature that accepted three arguments: paramA, paramB, paramC. The old installed version, 1.x.x, did what was intended, but for some dumb reason, 2.x.x calls the function with paramA as paramB and paramB as paramA!
It took me a god damn while to find out why shit wasn't working as expected. Who thought this was a good idea?3 -
We were in the process of signing up an enterprise company. We sent them a spreadsheet requesting a list of all of their staff so that we can create user accounts for all of them. That dumb shit at the company printed out the spreadsheet and then filled out the printouts using her pen and then took a photograph of it and emailed it back to us.3
-
Holy shit this is creepy.
So I just got back from a team event today from a location that was a few hours away and, while we were at the hotel there was a little cardboard box on our breakfast table with an ad on it. The slogan on the ad was “Bada book Bada boom” it was really dumb and I almost forgot about it, but just now I’m listening to pandora on a completely separate network, many hours away from the location and an ad comes on with the SAME SLOGAN for what I assume was the same company.
Now I’m just wondering how they managed to do that.... I really do not believe it was a coincidence considering I have never heard that ad on my pandora before....
This is fucking creepy1 -
SWE in fintech in MNC, job involves "bigdata' . Get paid >> avg
I FUCKING HATE IT. THIS PLACE IS A REAL DREAM-KILLER.
Size of the big-data ??? <50 GB ! Entire place runs on gimmicks and show off.
PO is a dumb cock sucker with minimal tech idea. He is busy sucking up business users and dictating us to rearrange tiles on reports all day long.
Fed up with all this shit , I decided to give GRE and apply for masters in Computer Vision .
For good GRE verbal score , I need to learn 1100 words , 90% of which I have never heard in my entire life.
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK ????????
Will my dream of working as a vision scientist for autonomous cars never come to life ???????
😢😢😢 😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢
Plz motivate me to get out of this shit-hole -
Hey, a bit of a dumb question.
When can someone call themselves a "real" programmer? I'm not one to gatekeep and say dumb shit like "iF yOu OnLy KnOw PyThOn Ur NoT a PrOgRaMmEr!", but I guess I want to know when I can call myself one. All I've done so far is make unpolished games in Unity for school that are created only to meet some requirements. I've also worked in my class' team for collaborative Unreal games, which has been painful to say the least. So, when I can stop gatekeeping myself over it? What sorts of experiences should I have? I understand that it's not a list of requirements like my projects are, but I'd like a general idea of when I can call myself a real developer.7 -
how in the fsck is it possible that people like us can maintain a fleets of servers, create the most amazing applications that drive the world economy, but not figure out how in the mother fsckin world to make our girlfriends iphones backup to icloud. don't bury the shit i want to do under 10 fucking layers of option screens and shit ui because you think your customers are too dumb. apple fail.
-
!Rant
I will have you know that being part of the mobile solutions team is pretty sweet when you have nothing to do but keep a few databases clean and up to date, test which iPad is best suited for the sales people and buy 20 cases to test them for sturdiness.
Seriously without dumb idiots arguing about roaming costs and demanding help with the most basic shit this would be heaven.
I mean it's apple but still having every color of the 9.7 iPad and of the 12,9 pro stacked up on your desk is pretty cool. -
I'm so fed up with our current "Bugtracking"system.
In the past we've been using mantis bt.
A heavily modified version though. Exactly specified to the developers needs with an integration to our own desktop software, which has time tracking and reports.
Also we had a separate mantis for everyone else.
Support guys and so on.
Everything was working fine.
But then "someone" decided that we shouldn't have two different mantis versions running and should integrate the support into the developer version.
Well ok. Makes sense.
So we changed mantis a bit so we can better differentiate the projects and tasks.
But "someone" is just too fucking dumb to understand how mantis works.
So after some time "someone" decided we won't be using mantis anymore, but a steaming pile of shit we have no control of how it works.
(It's called Wrike if you want to take a look at that)
It's completely useless if you want to use it as a bugtracker.
Maybe it works for the support guys I thought and asked them.
Seems they barely use it. They rather write everything down on paper and manually write their times into our desktop software now. Fucking awesome!
And even better. "Someone" isn't using this confusing and totally useless shit either.
I'm fed up.
I'm gonna set up a new version of mantis write everything the wrike api gives me into it.
Also need to modify it, so it works with our desktop software again.
And an integration with our Gitlab would be nice too I guess.
(Can't use the old mantis version we had, because it didn't have projects inside projects, which because of Wrike now is needed to sync)
Uh...
Lots of work...
So much time wasted...
And so much time still has to be wasted... -
I’m working on a react codebase and company decided to add a new module.
Now im writing markup and css to ensure UX is smooth as designers thought of it.
Imagine my horror when I start to code and find out no matter what HTML tag i use, it’s been FUCKING OVERRIDDEN in the global stylesheet. AND STYLES HAVE BEEN OVERRIDDEN WITH !important
They’re also using Ant design as a component library. Guess what, default ant design classes have been overridden too. So i try to use ant design button or card, and bam, MAGICALLY SOME DESIGN FROM SOME SHITHOLE MODULE DECIDES TO FUCK WITH MY STYLES
On top of that, styles of parts of application has been written in SASS, some part of application uses bootstrap components some use third party components like tables and responsive grids to suit to their preferences. Some parts use handwritten css. Some parts use CSS IN JS and styled components. THE FUCK IS THIS GARBAGE!!!! THE FUCKING CODEBASE HAS A MIND OF ITS OWN!!!!!! YOU NAME A WAY TO ADD STYLES TO A COMPONENT, ITS THERE!!!
And the company’s management thought a “fractal” approach to maintain each individual view is “best” for SCALABILITY!!! HOW THE FUCK DID IT NOT CROSS YOUR DUMB MIND THAT FRACTAL APPROACH ALSO GUIDES TO HAVE ALL COMMON STUFF AT ONE PLACE!!!! THIS CODEBASE HAS DUPLICATE STYLES AND DUPLICATE CODE IN ALMOST EVERY MODULE!!!!
Not to mention every developer choosing to freely decide the way they should write their code without any guidelines.
HOW THE FUCK PEOPLE WRITE THEIR CODE WITHOUT THINKING ABOUT OTHER DEVS!!! SO BASICALLY I AM NOT ONLY CLEANING SOMEONE ELSE’S SHIT BUT ALSO TRY NOT TO SHIT IN THE PROCESS!! FML2 -
The new twitter developer stuff is SHIT.
I need to apply now for my small app I use wanted to build this evening as an automation site project. Can't you cunts just give me access to this api so I can finish my projects.
How the fuck should I describe in 300 characters THAT I WILL BE TWEETING ONE TWEET PER WEEK NOTIFYING ABOUT A NEW EPISODE.
Now I need to fill 80 more characters with some dumb stuff just to be able to apply.....5 -
So... I’ve recently started a new role, and luckily I’ve established myself as someone that knows his shit (more or less) TM.
I’m leading the charge on tech debt, and raising issues about it, first on my radar is the monstrosity of their approach to app config.
It’s a web app, and they store config in a key-value table in the database.
Get this. The key is the {type}.{property} path and this is fetched from the database and injected *at construction* via reflection.
Some of these objects get instantiated dozens of times per-request. Eurgh. -
Just opened Telegram to read new messages from a random group in which I was added by a total random guy. Saw that guy asking for some help on how he could get more free RAM in his phone for whatever reasons. Then saw this fucking asshole writing dumb shit instead of helping him and everybody is now praising him like God. I thought of telling that dick what he's upto, but just left that fucking group of morons immediately.
4 -
The getting started of react native sucks big time.
If you don't want to display a completely centered text then go fuck yourself or what?
I mean there isn't even a howto on platform-independently not overlapping the fucking status bar. Everyone must've faced this problem when starting, but the only answer is an 8 times upvoted answer on SO telling me to add a hardcoded padding. What.
Where did this whole thing come to..🙁
Back in the days books about c didn't even start with more than 4 lines of code on the 70th page.
And when you google things about it it feels like you doing something totally wrong but its like the first thing a normal dude would do, what if i don't want shit centered bro i feel so useless and dumb i friggin hate that shit just fucking tell me what the fucking fuck to do!😫
It bugs me so hard cus i didn't even know a View is able to stick out on top of the app it doesn't make no sense to me the whole world is breaking apart12 -
Jesus christ I need my VP and CIO to get their hands out of Azure and GCP and just let me work.
Yes, governance and security and IAM are big deals. That's why you have infraops people like me to deal with that.
I'm literally working with one hand tied behind my back because just about every button press or CLI command I need to do my damn job as a professional cloud fluffer requires me to go bother an executive and ask permission to pretty please can I deploy a new container, can you go press the shiny button? No not that one, move your mouse up...up..now UP..ok over lef-no..can I have mouse control? Sigh fine, do you see where it says "Approvers", no that says "Release Pipeline"
Look I actually kinda like this job, I do, in as much as when I have something to do I get left the fuck alone to do it. Meetings are minimal, aside from the odd days when one of our app services decides to yeet itself into the river Styx, there's little distractions.
Yeah, developers do dumb shit but that's probably best left to the notion of job security and never talked about again less they go to HR and complain that the ops guy was very stern and direct and made the developer take some accountability for their work product.
AND YET
It's so intergalactically stupid that I have to go ask permission just to do ops tasks by the same people barging down my goddamn door asking why the ops task isn't done yet.
"Because you won't give me permissions in GCP to actually DO anything".
Okay. Rant over. Time for lunch. Good meeting, see you all at the holiday party.
2 -
Sometimes I wish I wasnt the boss, but if I wasn't I'd have some dumb 40 year old telling me what to do, that's doesn't know shit about computers
-
The product owner, cum our solutions architect is dumb.
It takes him ages to explain one shit.
Also, he is an expert on triggering useless chaos and panic, thanks to his innate abilities to misinterpret shit.
He thinks everything should happen at 3×10^8 m/s.3 -
oh my goodness if I dhsfjhsjfhj
i can barely type right now im so frusterated
I've told my manager multiple times that I don't feel comfortable with the task hes trying to give me because it feels way too large (its designing/programming/testing/documenting an entire prototype cloud file sync application and server backend service on my own, replacing one we have had for several years) and he still just ignores me and persists that I should be thankful for the opportunity and challenge.
It pisses me off so much when people say dumb shit like, 'its a great opportunity to learn' at work. No it isn't. Your boss is going to be on your fucking case for taking too long or not delivering enough, and thats exactly what happened. He got upset and said he was expecting more things to have been written down by now, like design notes. I was just fuming. Design notes? I'm not even a freaking designer, I've never designed any type of big software ever, what the fuck do you want from me.
On top of that, I don't know where the hell he expects me to get time for this. I'm apparently also devops so I get yoinked off of anything im doing if some stupid thing breaks in some other environment about something I really don't even care about. Any other random ass task just gets dumped on me too. I'm supposed to be a 'junior developer', and get paid as such (i've wanted to go to the intermediate level but get told the title doesn't actually matter and no pay raise for you) but I get the responsibilties of a whole fucking team dumped on me and its just
do I just quit now? I'm just, for fuck sakes man4 -
So one of my colleague does not put fucking merge and commit rules in his piece of shit project, and somehow I gotta help maintaining it. I wish I was admin to put some order in this bullshit.
Some other dumb fuck decided to copy paste a slack thread containing code and commit it in the master branch because he does not understand what the fuck he is doing. Prod is now going to shit lol.
This legit just gave me cancer. -
omg, I hate my managers who always make engineering design decisions, literally, my manager made shortcuts and decisions that I told him not to do, now we have to live with this shit. which can be fine, but then in 1:1 he tells me that I have a short-term vision, I am like hello you stupid piece of shit, don't you remember telling us what to do and we pushed back to you for all the dumb decisions you have made. my manager has no idea about technology and yet people listen to him for engineering decision, stupid.5
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Add XYZ for foobar
vs
Add XYZ
The first name has that little bit of extra detail so I can have a clue what's going on since these damn jira tickets aren't linked up so I'd know what depends on it.
I'm too dumb to have unpuzzled the architecture document and scooby-doo-ed all this shit together for what I'm doing and why I'm doing it.2 -
I am overwhelmed in my mind right now and I kinda just need it out.
I'm incredibly divided. There's so much I want to do which is fine I can balance some of it kinda well but when it comes to the programming aspects of what I want to do is where my head gets tugged in multiple directions.
Parts of me really want to continue to dive into C# and learn it a lot more than I currently do so I can continue to write the tools I use for problems I come across.
And the other part of me just wants to go do lower level development with C because that's where most of my goals are being mostly embedded and OS development.
But so many people I know that are incredibly smart devs use C# and I see why it's an incredible language and I'm glad it's one of the languages I know but I feel like there's so much to learn about it and I there's so much shit I see that I'm just like I don't know when I would want to use this, or I can see X feature being very useful but I don't know where I'd use it in my projects. Hell even C#s version of structs I know are very useful but I'm not able to make good use of them
I'm just in that headspace where I'm not learning enough and I feel dumb when I look at someone else's project because there's a lot more complexity In their project that none of my projects have ever had and so many people make use of language features I've never used or thought about using (generics being a good example) and I'm constantly asking questions which I know is okay but too much is happening in life lately and it's just making it harder to handle.
Thanks to anyone that got through it hopefully I'm not alone in these feelings2 -
I just finished a bunch of newly configured containers that I had to switch off centos7 to almalinux9. I have one thing to say,
Fuck NetworkManager!
I know im basically a dinosaur when it comes to any coding, especially scripting. I prefer notepad.exe or sublime to VScode... you couldnt pay me enough to use crap like vbstudio... but I know I need to get better at not just rewriting thing to suit my preferences since i have others working for or with me now.
so... I tried... I reeeeally tried to tolerate NetworkManager... tried to learn/tolerate dumb nmcli and it's matrixed array of dyslexic syntaxes. I just couldnt do it... that plus the damn default images having bs like an effectively blank, non-error-generating resolv.conf file.
NetworkManager got killed... I went back and edited my network-scripts and scripted those to other scripts for changing the statics around if/when needed... took waaaay less time.
I just dont get why something like NetworkManager even exists on any EL distro... yeah sure, wifi takes a couple extra steps and is super common now... but shouldnt be how any actual servers need to communicate. can people just not fathom putting shit in a few files in proper syntax anymore???5 -
So I made this graph plotter lib with js for the company and there was this other dude who was supposed to make a recording stream from a specified source to the graph and he was also supposed to make the graph part for the web as he was the web dev and not me but I ended up doing it anyways.
So I share this source for graph with him and next thing you know motherfucker changed the name of the lib to something dumb calls it a working demo and sends it off for testing and QC. The QC does not know shit about executing web based source so he calls me and guess what I found out the shit that I explained above.
Wow people are just fucking disgusting. -
If he has to ask me one more fucking time if I've updated my daily standup notes in that dumb fucking OneNote notebook, I will burn this fucking country down. I do it every time, on time. Sometimes even before the others. And the box next to my name is checked. Sync your shit, dude!6
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!dev
Hello there..
I always wanted to have my first post here be something that pisses the sh!t out of me.
tl;dr: Memes are for braindeads and kids are fucktards
Backstory:
So basicaly I am now having a summerjob before my next semester starts so I can make some cash to buy some overpriced stuff I dont probably need. I work at a factory, 3 shift work and today we had Night shift, so there was me and a bunch of Arab guys, kicking our asses by pure boredom and desperacy.
Act One:
I was bored, opened my phone and decided entertain myself by some funny sh!t I can find on Mark Sugarhills webpage. I was just passing by some random a bit funny stuff and then I found some random ass meme, which doesnt give a single, even distant sence to me.. So since my german is as good as my coding skills (read: complete shit) I couldnt ask for opinion of my fellow coworkers and since its fuck1ng 4am theres noone to ask on messenger or whatever. So I did it... I asked in a goddamn comments, what the fck is that supposed to mean and Aw dear Lawd... I did a mistake.
Act 2:
Like 4 seconds after my question I had a response and I was like 0.o It has to be some Alice of Facebook so I guess someone cool. Oh boy I was never so wrong. The answer... the... FUCKING answer was.... "normie."
What the actual fuck?
Like man statisticaly speaking, there is 200,000 people on this wannabe funny site and since everyone is apparently laughing their asses off, I am the motherfucking original snowflake.
But I wanted to play it cool... was like Uhm sorry, I really tried but cant figure it out.
His fuck-me-sideways-with-rusty-crowbar answer was:
a) The joke is hidden in some random thing we created yesterday and decided to call it a culture
b) "u dumb"
Act 3:
I hope that most of you finally guessed it! Its the second fucking answer and oh sweet mother of pain, please find him, BUT thats where I flipped and fucking lost it.
The fucking nerve to speak to me like that u dissrespectful piece of shit. Go watch some Twitch, while I SSH into ur ass and hit u harder than ur mom her forehead everynight when she realises that she could have swallow you dickhead.
Afterthoughts:
I was always worries that my child would like to be a Rapper, or Youtuber...
But today Im adding being some dumb ass meme creator.8 -
Digistore24 is a steaming pile of shit!
The whole product creation and purchase integration is covered by ugly smelling donkey shit. This whole dumb service is made by idiots.
The 'scripts' they provide to throw at your server for generic customer handling is a joke. Just a raw php mess. But nothing works and debugging this piece of shit is nearly impossible because they don't even provide a proper documentation on how they make the request to your machine.
🤬2 -
if you ask me how the method i wrote works because you don't understand it, and you don't let me finish my sentences without interrupting me, then you deserve to be punched.
LET ME FINISH WHAT I HAVE TO SAY YOU DUMB SHIT
I WROTE THAT FUCKIN METHOD
I KNOW WHAT IT DOES AND WHY -
CUDA is a fucking bitch when it comes to configure projects
Creating my first CUDA project it yelled at me it doesn't support my current gcc version, ended up with me yelling back "OY SHUTUP" and slapping some flag for it to use clang instead — basically what it advised but I didn't listen first. Fine now.
Working on this project on another fresh environment, and now it doesn't detect anything and dumbly tries to reload my CMake project with the LATEST installed gcc when I already told it to use version 8 TWICE. First by setting up a toolchain with compilers pointing to this specific version and second by passing the -DMAKE_C_COMPILER pointing to it again. Still this stubborn piece of shit tries with latest everytime.
The most applauded solution was to use update-alternatives to make gcc point to the version I want CUDA to use. Thank you genius, but what if I don't want to use a deprecated gcc version with normal Cxx projects ?
And cherry on the top of this bullshit, I'm fixing this dumb configuration issue (can't stress enough how much I hate this shit) to be able to fix an EVEN MORE annoying issue with CUDA being a bitch AGAIN and not letting me use std functions where I'm allowed to
Fuck CUDA. Fuck CMake. Fuck C. Fuck everything3 -
Wishing Happy Engineers day to all those idiotic-not-so-good-engineers working at Microsoft. Windows 10 is still the biggest horse-shit you'll ever see for an operating system.5
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What if life was on git? Where you can simply create new branches of it, stash shit, remove dumb people with dependencies and finally the ability to turn back time with this version control.5
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Okay this is my first time posting on this site. I've browsed it (definitely not in class) and the community looks beautiful, so I'm going to just kind of slide in here. Anyways this is the part where I use my caps lock button and type lots of naughty words I guess...
<rant type = 'school'>
Our programming classes are fucking DISMAL uuugh... Okay so we have four technology classes: Tech Exploration, Coding 1, Coding 2, and Intro to CS (a 'high school' level class)... So this means a fuck ton of kids in programming classes, mostly because I WANNA MAKE MINCERAFT AND BE A KEWL BOI LIKE GAME DEV BUT I'M ALSO A FUCKING IDIOT AND WILL NOT LEARN ANYTHING YAAAAAAY but that's a mood and so there's a fucking tidal wave of dumb kids in these classes. So right we're dealing with like 80 kids per class period. Sorry if I'm repeating myself but there are a FUCKTON of students. Now, we have... wait for it... ONE FUCKING TEACHER. ONE. I fucking swear this district does not give a SINGLE SHIT about possibly THE SINGLE FUCKING MOST IMPORTANT SUBJECT WHYYYYYY... Okay so the teacher is kinda overworked as fuck lol. She can't really teach eighty kids at once so she mostly gives us exercises from websites but when she can she teaches us shit herself and actually knows a good bit about her field of study. She's usually pretty grumpy, understandably, but if you ask her a good question that makes her think you can see the passion there lol. So anyways that's a mood. Now at the other school it's even worse. They have this new asshole as a teacher that knows NOTHING about ANYTHING IT IS SO FUCKING REDICULOUS OH MY UUUUUGH... THEY STILL DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT A FUCKING LOOP IS LIKE OKAY YOU'VE BEEN TEACHING PROGRAMMING FOR A YEAR AND YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE TEACHING IT AT THAT DISTRICT SO MAYBE YOU SHOULD AT LEAST FUCKING TRY WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU... so he just makes them do shit from a website and obviously can't do half of the shit he assigns it's so fucking sad... I swear this district is supposed to be good but maybe not for the ONE THING I WANT IT TO BE GOOD FOR. Funny story: in elementary school once I wrote down school usernames for people I didn't really know and shared them a google doc that said "you have been hacked make a more secure password buddy" etc etc and made them the owner and these dull shits report it to the principal... So I'm in the principles office... Just a fucking dumb elementary school kid lol and the principal is like hAcKiNg Is BaD yOu ShOuLd NoT dO iT and I'm like how did you know it was me... so he goes on to say some bullshit about 'digital footprint' and 'tracing' me to it... he obviously has no clue what he's saying but anyways afterwards he points to where it says last change made by MY SCHOOL ACCOUNT... HOW DULL CAN YOU FUCKING POSSIBLY BE IT WAS FROM MY ACCOUNT THAT LITERALLY PROVED THAT I DID --NOT-- 'HACK' INTO THEIR ACCOUNT YOU DUMB FUCK. Okay so basically my school is a burning pile of garbage but it's better than most apparently but it's GARBAGE MY GOD... Please fucking tell me it gets better...
okay lol that was longer than I thought it would be guess I just needed to vent... later I guess
</rant>12 -
I'm so confused by our architecture and development process in general
We planned what features are to be implemented (e.g. what endpoints should do what), but there are parts of tasks which depend on others, and I'm not sure what classes to build or when to start a task given that related ones are being done by other developers, I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing
I could maybe do all of this alone my way if it was just me, but when I ask in planning about how we should go about implementing shit together, I just get backlash from this senior developer telling me we shouldn't waste time discussing implementation details in planning
Like, what the fuck do you want me to fucking do, just implement all the dependencies of what I'm doing from zero, without reusing any of the code other devs are doing that touches on the same parts?
Fucking hell, man, this is the third sprint where I'm confused like this
Maybe I'm just too dumb to be a developer after all lol6 -
I fuck get angry when I try to teach my real close mates like my family about computers or some basic things, but I am fuck relaxed and more human and take time to teach the same shit to total strangers. Am I dumb sick or what. Fuck me.1
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Exercise do the pyramid of * and I looked up how to do it but so many people are able to do it without looking it up I dont know why shit to do with nested for loops makes me feel so dumb.
I know it's not a big deal to not know how to do every single thing but I'm always even stuck on the smallest exercises that apparently more people can do than not. Like how am I supposed to have thought about that or figured that out. How am I supposed to learn all this shit. Like for example just look up a list of basic exercises and I cant do any of them. I'm not good at this and its stressing me out because how will I get better or hell even a job if I cant solve these simple problems? How am I supposed to get better at solving these simple problems? I cant just keep looking at the fucking solution because that wont stick or teach me anything
Most stupid thing to rant about by far4 -
At work, when I try to find the best place to implement some code, I read the current code to get why it's here, and if I'm at the right place to do my stuff.
Sometimes the previous dude writes a shitty code because, well, Drupal 8 and he didn't have much choices to make his stuff work.
But some other times just reading the code feels like double checking if I did all my vaccinations. When these moments occure, I activate the annotate mode in PHPStorm so I can see who wrote this piece of dumb shit code, so I can insult him in my head while doing my stuff.
Sorry pal, I'm not paid enough to write a WORKING code for you at your place, but at least you'd know that if you were drowning, I'd share my point of view about this planet's overcrowding. Fucker. -
Feel dirty writing in c. How do people even deal with unsafe pointer type casting/memory allocation/free? The codebase is plagued with memory leaks and there is no test.
I will just pretend I can't read c code and play dumb when shit happens15 -
HAHAHAHAHAHA
Just spent the last half hour messing with a scammer. Finally shut his ass up when I posted his address and phone number. Fucking fake ass fucking dumb little cunt bullshitter. Fucking learn the power of google you inbred worthless shit.1 -
literally the last fucking thing i need to work for my mvp is ffmpeg to fucking work. i literally need to add audio at various start times in the video, sounds so easy right? too bad its a complex, cryptic, and horrible peice of shit.
no wonder stackoverflow is full of ffmpeg garbage
imaging writing a novel to run some audio / image editing commands, jesus christ
🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡
still at it 3 hours later, this should NOT be that hard ITS ALMOST FUCKING MIDNIGHT NOW YOU DUMB FUCKS FUYCK YOU FOR BUILDING THE MOST CONVOLUTED FUCKING SHIT EVER GOD I. AM. SO. SICK. OF. SHIT. LIBRARIES. WITH. SHIT. DOCS. SHIT. USERS. AND BULLSHIT. NO. FUCKING. SENSE. APIS.2 -
I was wondering if anybody working for a larger Company in 3rd-Level faces the same personal problems as me?
We got alot of our own developed software and process. Regulary some Keyuser fucks something up by importing something wrong, which skews the master data. Its intended to be managed by the Keyuser.
Fast Forward, my Keyusers are so dumb, that they fuck up the master data import wrongfully. The process behind that then have wrong Data to operate (a numeric value neeeds to be set).
The Enduser then opens a Ticket for problem XYZ. Then the Keyuser forwards us the issue.
We already had that same issue X amount of times and its always the same reply. I made a FAQ, Knowledgebase entry, etc.
Nothing works, 2 weeks pass and a similiar tickets comes in...
Memory Capacity of the User exceeded after 1 Day. FML
Anybody facing the same shit?6 -
Fuck Oracle, fuck you oracle! The stupidest shittiest worst nightmare company with the most user-unfriendly, productivity-killing, illogical, stupid pile of software garbage products ever! And unfortunately I want to extends my worm-fucks to all Oracle employees and maintainers and to the whole fucking community of shit that made up oracle-community and to every conscious being who ever liked, enjoyed or have found the slightest genuine interest of any product tagged "oracle".
I installed the pile of shit a.k.a Oracle 18c and imported a dumb file locally, everything was working in the slightest amount of the word (fine) before it turns to nightmare. I created a C# client to call a stored procedure in that shit of a database engine. I kept getting error related to the parameter types, specifically one which is custom type of Table of numbers. It turns out that the only of doing this is through that shit they called (unmanaged driver), the "managed" doesn't support custom types. So I had to install another package of shit they call (odbc universal install) "universal my a$$ by the way", at that moment, where everything just crashed and stopped working. I spent 3 hours trying to connect to the fucking database to no avail. I shockingly found a folder in my desktop folder called (OracleInstallation) and all windows services related to oracle installation "suddenly" got somehow (re-routed) to that folder.
In conclusion, fuck oracle.4 -
Been 6 months at this one company and still don't have a good grasp on many things, I'm also almost absolutely useless in oncall and always loop in someone else, it's like my brain just afks.
I'm sure everyone has that one dumb Dev on their team, guess it's me this time, I can sense the annoyance from my teammates by my stupidity so far, there's just so much to learn about domains and specific things that only come up when things break, idk how to gain proper knowledge without someone babysitting me and Its shit for someone to do that (I'm not a junior Dev)12 -
I never stop being amazed by how one of your people call and say "client X is stuck they can't do shit omg omg top tier emergency" and when you ask them what's the issue they say "well idk they didn't say anything, how are you gonna fix it?" as if i had a magic wand and could fix everyone's problems with a snap of my fingers and understanding what's happening with literally 0 details.
Turns out 1 minute later the "issue" was due to the customer being dumb, software was more than fine and running correctly 🤔 -
See this? Dont ever fucking tell me to use mongodb. Half the time this website is fucking broken and down. Imagine you have a production ready app that is now also fucked because this piece of shit is fucked. I always viewed anyone using mongodb as DUMB fking shitass script kiddy with a small dick helping bill gates to gangrape some kids at the epstein island
11 -
this is dumb.. i been trying to learn more about google places' A.P.I so i could implement them in android studios... spend 4 hours and all i can see is garbage tutorial and no detail place. oh at least i got my A.P.I key! pshh my googling skills are failing me big time!. make this shit easier google!.4
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Lately I read post from democracy developer how we are unable to run democracy in direct way. We know something in some fields and are si fucking dumb in others. Sure we could make research, but it takes time which most of us don't have, so we could chose as we feel which could be more less correct, but even doing research could lead as nowhere. But it isnt only fucking democracy, same goes with medication, food, raising children and there goes fucking shopping. We ass people don't like shitty things or more correctly we don't want ti fucking know it and don't want expensive things, middle is the best, but when you could afford best quality it us easy to associate it with price which is so fucking lie. There is this ios and android battle and a lot of others and it is fucking insane. Why? Because everything is advertised as fucki.g awesome, cocksucking shit which could you eat, shit and eat again. It makes you full, well feed and slim, also makes you boobs, penis, ass of whatever bigger than average (always bigger no matter how much average is).
You want to buy coffee? Our brand is fuckj.g best roasted, best seeds from best plantation and costs only 7$ per kg, fuck you because it tatses like shit and makes me vomit. sure obvious scam, but what with 20-30$ coffee? It is well roasted, freshly roasted and do they fucking know how to do that?
Fuck coffee, go to buy t-shit which one isnt fucking cut off efficiency which also make t-shit stretched as ass after naked night in prison?
Laptop? Fuck you each one is fucking best for everhtbing, 4GB of RAM, slow HDD, shitty CPU and windows 10 onboard? Beast of performance and also mobile, the best laptop ever. Obvious scam, sure, but 1000$ laptop? could be decent? Fuck you, shitty hinge and case so it is like fuckenstein monster.
Why couldn't we have honest advertising? because noone will buy it, shitty shit. Even fucking numbers don't always tell you which is better... fucking shit.
Have a nice day ;)4 -
I've been using go for two days and I'm already pissed at it. Don't get me wrong, I like the language itself, I love the simplicity, the tooling and frameworks are the problem. Like, why does everything have to be so hard?
Why do I have to spend around 4 hours in total just to configure a fucking linter?
Why does everything have to live inside the fucking GOPATH?
Why the fuck can't I put a src/ folder in my project so I don't mix code with config files, docker files, etc?
Why the hell does documentation for frameworks/libraries/tools suck so much? Looking at you Gin and Gorm.
Why can't gin-swagger just find out what routes I have?
I must be either dumb or chosen the wrong frameworks and libraries, but the "development experience" I'm having sucks. Nothing works first try and documentation is shit and vague.
I want to like the language, but I can't, at least not if it's always going to be shit like this. Does it get better? Am I just a noob? Or should I just jump ship and look for something else?4 -
It's been a long time since I was active but I felt like ranting about my shit college today.
Everything is so slow and dumb there. I'm in year 2 and we started learning JavaScript in class and our teacher said: "Here's a picture of a soccer score table. Now try to remake it with HTML and CSS!". WTF? I thought we were supposed to learn JavaScript?
This wasn't the first case of stupidity in my college (more stories coming soon).3 -
My most consistent enemy at work is this fucking system I have to work in, holy shit. Not only is there no default support for shit you would really think there should be, no real control over the interfaces with the UI, and the far too complicated method they use to magically make said interfaces, but we also have to use their build environment to build this shitty thing. So builds take anywhere from 4 to 12 minutes a pop and ridiculous style guide will stop the build, no questions asked, for dumb violations like spaces between if and (. And it doesn't catch these, sometimes, until 7 or 8 minutes in. I have wasted so much time on this. And seeing as we work in 2 week sprints that are really 7 to 10 day sprints based on whatever hair goes up my bosses ass and have to deliver feature complete in those two weeks, I can't really afford all this nonsense. I used to joke about having an alcohol problem, but I think I actually may be developing one at this point.
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So we now do continuous deployment to a development environment. Once a PR gets merged it gets deployed there. We then have to manually deploy to staging every so often.
We did this because QA wined that the Dev was constantly breaking Staging, when we contentiously deployed to that.
So now we have a staging instance that is always behind. Which isn't big deal, because its supposed to be stable right?
Well now the stupid fucking QA team is always making mountains of tickets and noise for stuff that is already fixed on the development instance.
Fucking shit that they message me about, or have to call me about. "Hey let me tell me about this thing I found." And then I'm like I already fixed that thing last week.
So it seems to be wasting everyone time to not just CDCI into staging. I have to wait weeks to retest my bugs on staging. To make sure that some other stupid fuckeshir on my team didn't undo or break my fucking fix. Shit keeps getting kicked out of QA Review. Fuck. lol.
Then there like I can update the thing on the database through the front end tool. Well tough shit buddy, your going to have to wait a week unti next staging deployment to see if that tool is fixed. This is your fault for fucking up our pure CDCI with your ideas. Now everything takes longer for everyody.
To sum things up. Some dumb bug makes it into the manual staging deployment and gets fixed an hour later. Doesn't get deployed until next fucking week. QA makes a bunch of noise about it. A thing that is fixed and in the pipe-line.
Also a dumb fucking bug will make it into staging, lets say a critical front-end back office tool that needs to send numbers to the backend, they send a fucking string instead of a number and break it. Now we have to redeploy the tool and backend to staging because there related. Then if we deploy backend we have to deploy the client facing site too. since it also depends on backend.
Its a fucking hassle.
Now if the fucking DevOps guy could do his job, and make a god-damn deploy button for all the staging servers that would be great.1 -
Compromise.
I think that sums up development pretty much.
Take for example coding patterns: Most of them *could* be applied on a global scale (all products)… But that doesn't mean you *should* apply them. :-)
Find a matching **compromise** that makes specific sense for the product you develop.
Small example: SOLID / DRY are good practices. But breaking these principles by for example introducing redundant code could be a very wise design decision - an example would be if you know full ahead that the redundancy is needed for further changes ahead. Going full DRY only to add the redundancy later is time spent better elsewhere.
The principle of compromise applies to other things, too.
Take for example architecture design.
Instead of trying to enforce your whole vision of a product, focus on key areas that you really think must be done.
Don't waste your breath on small stuff - cause then you probably lack the strength for focusing on the important things.
Compromise - choose what is *truly* important and make sure that gets integrated vs trying to "get your will done".
Small example: It doesn't really matter if a function is called myDingDong or myDingDongWithBells - one is longer, other shorter. Refactoring tools make renaming a function an easy task. What matters is what this function does and that it does this efficiently and precise. Instead of discussing the *name* of the function, focus on what the function *does*.
If you've read so far and think this example is dumb: Nope... I've seen PR reports where people struggled for hours with lil shit while the elephant in the room like an N+1 problem / database query or other fundamental things completely drowned in the small shit discussion noise.
We had code design, we had architecture... Same goes for people, debugging, and everything else.
Just because you don't like what weird person A does, doesn't mean it's shit.
Compromise. You don't have to like them. Just tolerate them. Listen. Then try to process their feedback unbiased. Simple as that. Don't make discussions personal - and don't isolate yourself by just working with specific persons. Cause living in such a bubble means you miss out a lot of knowledge and insight… or in short: You suck because of your own choices. :-)
Debugging... Again compromise: instead of wasting hours on debugging a problem, ASK for help. A simple: Has anyone done debugging this before or has some input for how to debug this problem efficiently?... Can sometimes work wonders. Don't start debugging without looking into alternative solutions like telemetry, metrics, known problems etc.
It could be a viable, better long term solution to add metrics to a product than to debug for hours ... Compromise. Find a fitting approach to analyze a problem instead of just starting a brute force approach.
....
Et cetera et cetera. -
You know what really grinds my gears? Java libraries that use native libraries when they could have easily done their task without them.
I’m looking at you Couchbase Lite. Use H2, not SQLite you dumb shit. Be smart like Nitrite. -
Had to optimize today a DB File / MySQL 5.7
I'm sometimes sad that software cannot bite people in their crotches, shit in their faces and fuck their eyes out.
The config was non commented and a disaster.
Yay. Let's set thread_cache to 16K while max connections is 50.
And raise limits like max files without adjusting SystemD / ulimit
And OF COURSE MySQL sucks...
So let's migrate to PostGres.
*Brainfart*
This has happened way too often.
Really. Software should have the right to punish dumb people. At least ... 10 kv shock to teach a lesson.1 -
> Colleagues complain all the time about dumb shit which have no relevance whatsoever to the job (see my "cat in voice call" post): I get scolded, I need to change
> I complain for the first time in 2 years about relevant stuff which actually matters to the job (some guy collecting bad decisions one after the other): I get scolded, I shouldn't trash talk colleagues
The key lesson I'm learning here is how everyone is allowed to do everything towards everyone, everytime, but by God don't you dare doing it about what should be relevant about your fucking job. We don't do that here.1 -
I've never been diagnosed but I'm certain I have ADHD, I get distracted extremely easily with absolutely "whatever" and it completely destroys my performance, I bet people think I'm dumb when in fact when I'm finally able to concentrate I can do things. It fucking sucks, feels like a curse. I realized I failed college because of this. Now I fear losing my job.
Right now I'm about to embark upon a great night of trying to catch up with shit I should have done earlier, which I *might* be able to focus on. I have no fun in life because I don't allow myself to, I somehow attained a relationship with someone and now that too is going to shambles because I spend so much time *trying* to do things and can't bring myself to doing them, and that time is stolen from that which I should spend with people I love and just enjoying life. I fucking hate this. I fucking hate it.
Also, I have this feature which I'm supposed to implement, and they tell me it's just an MVP which we'll use to test waters to see if people will use the functionality, it just has to work... which it does by now, but then they keep adding things before ever releasing. I feel so anxious about this and I didn't even take the job for good pay because I was desperate to leave another job which wasn't even in development. I don't want to fail this, I want to prosper as a developer. I actually wanted to do systems programming and game development, but here I am doing web shit.
Oh well. I shall throw myself unto thee.5 -
Ever feel like the world ate you and shit you out the otherside into the hell everyone else was waiting in ?
Two things are making me feel that way.
One all this dumb crap and accompanying embittering knowledge.
Two python.
Just so there is some relation to programming and all the other farsical evil bullshit I deal with on a daily basis you bastards.2 -
Fuck nrwl.
This stupid puddle of barf software that gets talked over like it's the shit. Nothing remotely useful works when using it. It always craps out some dumb exceptions that have nothing to do with your actual code but the dumb fuck, that didn't have the brain cells to think half a step ahead when doing his job.
It's just a buggy, mostly useless piece of shit that some guys in nice suits sell like it's jesus 2.0.
I hope you burn in hell.
I haven't been this mad since a looong time.2 -
!rant
Right now i'm working as a volunteer developer for a discord server. I've recently been learning JDA (a Discord API java wrapper) and I wanted to get some experience in a more real world environment by working on a Discord Bot. What a mistake
The owner of the server has written some pretty messy, but solid code, and I was asked to build as sort of “punishment system” (warns, kicks, mutes, bans, all of which timed). It started off fine, me doing some work, getting some critic, all good. Soon, it started to get worse. At every point of the way, while i’m working I have him trying to make me add new features, and change massive existing ones even after i’ve done them and moved on with his permission! I keep telling him, “it’s a work in progress, please wait”, but it never stops.
I’m planning to resign, but I have to continue to dodge him and his “suggestions” as I simply want to finish my work, and get out. The reason I need to avoid his as, I feel that if I was to alert him I was to leave in advance, things would only get worse in the time while I stayed.
:/5 -
I don't get the point writing SHIT code for a project you're paid less than you expected! Shouldn't you use that oportunity and improve your knowledge, instead of complicating your and life of a person who will take care of that code later? The fuck! You work in a TEAM and not in a stupid shithole of your dumb ass!
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You know you have been on devrant for far too long when your wife notices your vocabulary is changing! Words like fuck, cunt, dumb ass, and phrases like a pile of shit, crafty stacked together you call code ...start coming out of your mouth!
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Agency life where the dev department plays 3rd string to our Creative/Experience team and our Demand Gen team. Mainly because the leadership has no idea how to sell dev work?
Oh, and when dev work comes in, its on a super rushed/compressed time table where we've over-promised, and under-charged.
No margin on this project? Yeah, no shit cause you sold it for 50% of what we told you it would cost, dumb ass.2 -
I have a dream that one day whenever you pass / assign / apppend an object you can choose to pass by value or reference, regardless of the object being a primitive or a container (list, vector etc.) object
So I could stop waste my time and bang my head to my desk over such dumb problems this shit induces because language designers found making list to be passed by reference fun
I know such behavior is inherited from C's logic, and I don't give a fuck about any further explanation I might already know. What can be explained doesn't mean that's logical.
You give the choice to pass by value or reference for every object the same way or you do not at all, but no mixed shit.
Just, shut up and make it happen.4 -
fuck this shit.
fuck the pile of arcane shit that is ARCore.
fuck the fucking pile of overcomplicated shit that is mapbox.
fuck the idiotic frankensteiny steaming pile of shit that is "arcore+mapbox lifesized maps unity project" or how is it called.
fuck this retarded scammy culture when a company is doing meetups with investors before even having a working prototype.
fuck this stupid fucking culture where there's no time for some actual, sensible, creative work, just grab these two repos from github and ducktape them together and we'll call that our demo which we will present to inverstors.
fuck every fucking molecule of this fucking world.
i just wanted to be creative. to CREATE stuff. CREATE, not pile up dumb half-baked nonprojects made by someone else on top of each other until the smell is too strong for anyone to see if it's actually reasonable or not.
i wanted to create stuff. make games. design and make them. actual interesting ones which have actual value (because fuck the retarded gaming industry who's imagination doesn't go beyond "u a dude who does pew pew to other dudes", but that's a different rant).
fuck this disgusting, retarded, idiotic, boring, lonely, cold, lobotomizedly stupid world where the only way to succeed is a shitty pile of shit scammy scum.
fuck me for not being able to learn how to be scammy scum, so I could be successful too. -
I am feeling a lot doubtful right now.
I am an average undergrad student who has been dedicating efforts in java/Android for most of my college life.
As of now i have decent command over java , launched 2 simple apps on playstore, worked as an android dev intern in 3 companies and make decent medium complexity apps. I will say i am 40-60% down the path of an expert native Android dev.
However apart from Android, am dumb as a stick. I know shit about ai,ml, web dev, js , react, hybrid stuff, and am not very good with competitive programming and system topics ( os, Algorithms, networking, etc)
So this closes a lot of doors for me. I can't apply to some top tier companies as they would either want expert competitive skills or expert Android dev skills.
I had bad experiences with startups which are usually willing take rejected students like me for the post of a droid dev... there is usually low packages , high pressure, and treatment like a slave
So i am very unsure what to do next. I have tried to learn web dev/ ai-ml-data sciences. They are not very interesting to me, but again, what is interest really :/
What should be my focus now?
A) I could be learning competitive and other interview related topics so that i could crack interviews of top companies , and later try to get a position of android developer there.
B) i could focus on become better in Android and start learning things that i don't know like rx, kotlin, etc. I could then hope to crack interview of medium sized app dev companies which would mainly focus on my android knowledge in their interviews
C) i could increase my skill set and learn web dev or ai/ml topics to increase my recruiter pool. It would be like option B, but i will have more medium sized companies willing to take me.
Currently i am in a shit storm. I am about to go into a mass recruiter company in which i have heard would be doing more or less data entry work2 -
There are two kinds of art and leisure: Apollonian and Dionysian. Apollo was the god of light, knowledge and other such things. Dionysus was the god of wine and ritual madness. In a nutshell, the beauty of the stars in the sky is Apollonian, and the beauty of nice juicy ass is Dionysian.
My info landscape was too damn Dionysian lately. I don’t even use TikTok or Instagram. I mean music I listened to, like aggressive dumb rap, bad slang, swearing… Wherever you look, there are Cardi B’s and Kim K’s, with their ugly eyelashes, ugly makeup, ugly inflated lips, ugly voice, ugly things they say. Watching the dumbest shit ever on YouTube. The louder you scream, the funnier the joke. Also, the number one content is some people tearing down some other people: penguinz0 destroying someone again, debunk channels, drama…
Dionysian things can be attractive and comfortable, because they speak to our animal part. In a way, Dionysian is natural. But not everything that is natural is good.
I gave my info landscape an Apollonian cleansing. Unsubscribed from a lot of debunking channels. Changed the way I speak, adjusted my vocabulary. Deleted a lot of music from my library. Went from 6ix9ine to Pink Floyd, Sting and Dire Straits.
It all started two weeks ago. I feel… different, but not necessarily better. Time will tell.3 -
stupid dumb wordpress, who POSTS a user registration, returns data to the SAME site with a dumb "successful" message alert, and THEN redirects to whatever page you want?!?! looks like shit, feels like shit in terms of UX
JUST REDIRECT ME TO THE PAGE I WANT FROM THE SERVER THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT OF PHP
I swear its as slow as balls too -
Microsoft one drive
I know you wanna sync my folder
I know you wanna provide a one drive alias to every file
But who the fuck in their right fucking mind makes a alias with space in path
Oh you dumb piece of shit 🤬3 -
So how does an experienced programmer break his own code in a such a terrible manner.
And why would someone try to make me embrace a bogus thing I KNOW doesn't work to make sure its broken ?
See this is what I hate about this shit.
No programmer would make the mistake that was made. They converted all their classes that interpret STRING VALUES using a parse to BitConverter.
(The input is a byte array) for like, ALL THEIR CLASSES.
Again this seems fucking intentional.
Instead of letting it remain a goddamn class that handed around an open file stream with a binaryreader around it which was simple, they tried some fucking fancy shit and throw readonlyspan<byte> at a read method which is where the code WILL fuck up ! wtf is wrong with you fucking dumb bastards ? IF YOU DONT WANT THE CHOMS GETTING AHEAD SHOOT THEM JESUS CHRIST !
Maybe this is some special interests shit to make sure ArcGis remains the dominant gis package and no ordinary lowly programmer can have a reader to get started with their own manipulations.
YOu fucking bastards screwed up the world and i want to eat your fucking hearts from your chests and wear your fucking scalps and ears on a fucking necklace while burning down your fucking houses !
AND FIX THAT GODDAMN STEAM RELEASE VALVE !!!1 -
Dumb asshole lays a half smoked joint near me
Got up threw that shit away
Not trying to get arrested
Meanwhile accomplice wanders out again -
Need some advise from all you clever devs out there.
When I finished uni I worked for a year at a good company but ultimately I was bored by the topic.
I got a new job at a place that was run by a Hitler wannabee that didn't want to do anything properly including writing tests and any time I improved an area or wrote a test would take me aside to have a go so I quit after 3 months.
Getti g a new job was not that hard but being at companies for short stints was a big issue.
My new job I've been here 3 months again but the code base is a shit hole, no standardisation, no one knows anything about industry standards, no tests again, pull requests that are in name only as clearly broken areas that you comment on get ignored so you might as well not bother, fake agile where all user stories are not user stories and we just lie every sprint about what we finished, no estimates and so forth, and a code base that is such a piece of shit that to add a new feature you have to hack every time. The project only started a few months back.
For instance we were implementing permissions and roles. My team lead does the table design. I spent 4 hours trying to convince him it was not fit for purpose and now we have spent a month on this area and we can't even enforce the permissions on the backend so basically they don't exist. This is the tip of the iceberg as this shit happens constantly and the worst thing is even though I say there is a problem we just ignore it so the app will always be insecure.
None of the team knows angular or wants to learn but all our apps use angular..
These are just examples, there is a lot more problems right from agile being run by people that don't understand agile to sending database entities instead of view models to client apps, but not all as some use view models so we just duplicate all the api controllers.
Our angular apps are a huge mess now because I have to keep hacking them since the backend is wrong.
We have a huge architectural problem that will set us back 1 month as we won't be able to actually access functionality and we need to release in 3 months, their solution even understanding my point fully is to ignore it. Legit.
The worst thing is that although my team is not dumb, if you try to explain this stuff to them they either just don't understand what you are saying or don't care.
With all that said I don't think they are even aware of these issues somehow so I dont think it's on purpose, and I do like the people and company, but I have reached the point that I don't give a shit anymore if something is wrong as its just so much easier to stay silent and makes no difference anyway.
I get paid very well, it's close to home and I actually learn a lot since their skill level is so low I have to pick up the slack and do all kinds of things I've never done much of like release management or database optimisation and I like that.
Would you leave and get a new job? -
Man people posting video of them copying code from code pen and say it’s their most creative login form so far
Like you can say today I’m gonna show you some code I found, but saying it’s your own code is just pure dumb, you are not that creative, you are dog shit1 -
You know in time all that will be left of them is maybe the idea that they were all whores and maybe people will feel sorry for them long after their dead
And that would be good because it would encourage a sense of humanity in future generations which being the exact opposite of what they want would be part of the sweet revenge
I think that splitting them off from the group that does all this creepy shit would also be a nice alteration to history
It would allow the young to despise the one while not falling victim to the propaganda they use to try to humanize themselves to cause other people grief and trauma down the road and would not allow them to falsely portray all people stuck in their line of work as the same kind of garbage trash that has no other use
Wouldn't that be lovely ? All the mind numbing buildup of chomo trash you people constructed torn down meaning lost and the ambiguous nature of much of it portrayed as it was portrayed as ordinary sex games and the like and adventures being left behind to delight people you'd all victimize in future generations ? All your wasted fucked up lives reduced to zero. Just like you all forced on so many others ?
Reverse pronouns if this isn't making sense since everyone knows you people speak English but just act like retards.
In time the world will heal
End of story
The perfect formula for screwing over younger straighter more innocent and good natured if lusty and angry people will no longer work and your fucked up abuses will disappear and noone will remember any of your names just like you creatures tried by stealing everything decent people created and passing it off as your own. And your dumb code will be as nonsensical then as it is now
Glorious
At least in the long run there is that as this evil is purely self destructive8 -
Agrrr... I hate to do code review of that shit! I hate to write docs for that shit! I hate to talk to PM! I hate dumb developers!
But there are several things about programming that make me calm and happy. When I'm thinking about one of those things I just sit and smile.
One such a thing is the process of upgrading gcc from sources.
1. Build new gcc with old gcc.
2. Build new gcc again with newly built gcc. Call this build A.
3. Build new gcc once more with build A. Call this build B.
4. Compare that A and B are exactly identical to the last bit.
5. You now have self reproducing compiler.
That is just beautiful and literally gives me chills. -
I love it when someone says they wish they could find people to stay when in reality they just want the opposite but to not seem somehow
Strange.
Which they are
More strange is the fact that they keep doing this dumb shit without enr in the ssme.way
And no they can't copy my fucking hard drives and the like here3 -
Has the message that this shit is dumb sunk in yet ? Noone would need to verify someone is real till they go crazy if things stopped repeating
If we all reach another era your messed up children will say John was the only sane person from this generation and a few others and that is considering some actual problems being present4
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