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Friend: so what is this app I always see you using on your phone?
Me: devRant, it's for developers! it gives us the chance to share rants!
Friend: Wow awesome!!! so what do you guys discuss, interesting stuff huh?
Me: Spaces.... spaces vs tabs.25 -
*I was recruiting programmer's for a Unity game and this guy came along*
Me: So what can you program in?
Pearson: HTML and a bit of CSS.
Me: *oh dear* any else?
Person: I learnt Python recently. I know how to make variables!19 -
- Go to www.fakeWindowsUpdate.com
- Click on one of the fake "installing updates" screen
- Make browser full screen
- Enjoy the prank!
I made my coworker wait for 90 minutes...lmao5 -
Interviewer: Why do you want to work for Facebook?
Me: I'm keen on protecting people's data and want them to have a good user experience
Interviewer:
Me:
Interviewer:
Me: haha I'm joking I don't give a shit
Interviewer: haha omg I was like whaaatttt lmao
src: https://twitter.com/ArfMeasures/...2 -
Lmao I’ve never learned how to program. I’m just winging it and have been able to fool everyone the last 10 years.
Senior engineer checking in.
11 -
The first time I tried to use an image as a background, this happened and it freaked me out lmao. Then I realized my mistake
7 -
Today after 1 year of taking shit I sat down with my manager and completely tore the whole fucking company apart.
I absolutely slammed my colleagues, obliterated my team lead, went on and on about how no one understands the basics and how everything we have is copy paste procedural code and the only way to fix what we have is to delete it. I then insinuated I want to quit because I cba with the struggle anymore.
Result? Fat promotion. Not sure what just happened here lmao.
14 -
> *WordPress website gets down Error 500: Cannot establish Connection with database*
> Marketing loses their shit: "We need the website up and working right now"
> *Me being calm *: "Nope, we cannot it's the service provider error, there's nothing we can do"
> *MK.G*: "Alright then, switch to another ISP ASAP"
> *Me, Internal rage, a volcano erupts *: "Umm..so you want to spend more money on another hosting because this one has an outage of 48 hours?"
>*MK.G *: "Yes, because we cannot run Facebook ads, just because website is down"
>*Internal lmao*: "Alright, but by the time you purchase a new service provider and host, the website will be up and running plus since the database is down we cannot migrate"
>*MK.G*: "I don't care, just make it up and working"
>*Me chilling*: "Alright, give me few hours"
> after a few hours the website is working *me being badass even though I didn't do anything*13 -
Finally got a job. The process was quick af! Hired in like a hour.
At least now I can't be homeless.
But I'm getting married Saturday, so this means one thing:
I'm a have to work while on honeymoon hahahah
My girl gonna be pissed but glad that I'm not broke10 -
Trying to explain to a coworker that the AJAX call he would like to do will not work due to same-origin policy restriction.
Coworker: «But for me it is working.»
Me: «What browser are you using?»
Coworker: «Internet Explorer»
LMAO2 -
Trying to convince my coworker to have a git repo instead of resending chunks of code in Slack... lmao12
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Our working hours are from 9 to 6 which is the standard in Malaysia (I'm not malaysian )
Yesterday I came in around 10AM and my boss took me to his room as soon as I arrived.
Boss: If you were in school and you come late what do you expect to happen ?
Me: get punished, I'll compensate by working an extra hour today.
Boss: well our clients aren't available at your extra hour and I'm struggelling with a big client you're supposed to ship the rest of his site and golive today and he's freaking out
Me: yh well his site is done it just needs final QA before going live.
Boss: oh its done already?, cool cool. Anyway you shouldn't be late you're not Malaysian and being late doesn't run in your genes like them.
*ops manager (Malaysian) walks in*
*boss confused*
*ops manager looks him in the eye*
*boss looks at the ground*
* me giggling while walking to my desk*3 -
When you're making a GitHub students account:
"We'll email you in a few weeks"
5 seconds later, you'll recieve an email:
"Hey <username>, we have some awesome news
We've upgraded you to a plan with unlimited free private repositories, which will be free for the next two years."
GitHub, I don't think you know what weeks are, lmao12 -
Just when I thought I'd seen the craziest job ad...
Title: Sr. Lead Data Scientist / Python Developer
Required education: bachelor's in CompSci, Math, etc. PhD preferred (lol)
Required experience: 10+ years in Python development
Other requirements: must be under 25 years of age to qualify for funding from EcoCanada (lmao!!!! y'all trippin)
Who is writing these job ads? I swear they get more insane every day.13 -
Just had chat with Microsoft support to solve a issue. I accepted remote session request. She did something and couldn't find proper a solution to my problem. Finally, she told a temporary solution and quit the chat.
When I was about to give feedback that she wasn't helpful, SHE CLOSED FEEDBACK WINDOW and then ended remote session. Lmao4 -
This trend is becoming really annoying really fast…
Bitmap.GetPixel isn't AI lmao
It remembers me of the "put blockchain everywhere" era.
19 -
"doEs AnYOnE HAVE IssUeS wiTh gETTing gIrl beCoz CodIng"
lmao what a fucking dweeb. What a loser really. How about we don't make a fucking job something akin to a personality trait?
were I single, would I sell myself as a "cODER" to a girl? fuck no, do some of you nerds really introduce yourself in such way? is this bs ass job your end all be all? aye, this be the easiest way to poise yourself in the complete opposite direction of the female sexual organ.
Fucking quit that shit, ain't no one really gasping for air because you can lay down some fucking js in a website, who gives a fuck? like really? these posts are so fucking annoying.
Grow a pair, and some personality.
Background: some dweeb complaining to me about finding it hard to get girls because of his "passion" station women would lose interest because all he would talk about is dev shit49 -
This happens everyday
> Picks phone up to test changes to mobile app
> oh look I got a notification
> Scroll, Scroll, like, like, lol, lmao, that's gross, lol, haha
> 5 minutes goes by
> Puts phone down
> Goes back to computer
> What the fuck am I forgetting....2 -
I found one of these in person :D
I had seen them on here before, but now I've seen one myself lmao
7 -
Encountered this is my computer science lab.
One of the most useless keys. Majority doesn't know what it does. And now there's two of it xD
6 -
Every fucking day in my company, we get an email from the HR titled "Good Morning, have a nice <DAY_OF_WEEK>", and the message contains a low quality shitty picture grabbed from a random Google search containing a equally shitty quote.
Today's quote read "Happy Friday! Friday is a day to finish your goals of the week!"
lmao like am I suppose to wait till Friday to finish my 'goals of the week'?
I'm so sick of these dumb fucks someone send help 🙄9 -
Some freshman at my school used inspect element to change some HTML and he thinks he's a hacker now. Lmao8
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I remember seeing Silicon Valley and watching Big Head do nothing at a big company and thought that was never possible.
Working at a FAANG company for 6 years and just completed 3 months of sitting around doing nothing, with 6 more months to come.
Life is indeed stranger than fiction.12 -
me and my co-workers: "lmao lets see if this github copilot is so great as they claim"
copilot: *solves issue we've been working on for 8 hours, in 10 seconds*
me and my co-workers:
(┛ಠ_ಠ)┛彡┻━┻10 -
Today I uttered words I thought I'd never say in my life....
"This is why linux is better"
What the hell is going on in 2020 lmao34 -
Do you guys ever miss the days of writing shitty programs in notepad.exe? When everything was new and magical? When your income didn't depend on your code?
Yeah me neither lmao.6 -
Some of my coworkers call connecting with SSH "git bashing", because they use git bash for making ssh connections. 😋
They never understand me when I use the term "SSH". 😔3 -
Are you a complete passive aggressive twat?
Are you 100% completely unable to stand up for yourself outside of the safety that a computer screen provides?
Are you a male and capable of only doing things that would take you in the absolute complete opposite direction of a vagina?
Are you a female and an insufferable twat?
Do you think that people's likes and dislikes are no better than yours?
Is your opinion better than anyone else's?
THEN BEING A DEVELOPER AND BEING IN DEVRANT IS JJJJJJJJUST WHAT YOU NEED!
Here in our community, the more full of shit that you are! the farther you will go up in popularity! Insufferable opinionated and biased assholes that could not throw a punch if their lives depended on it is LITERALLY WHAT IT IS ALL ABOUT!!
lmao, I swear man, some of y'all are just too full of shit.22 -
I was in class and this one guy was having difficulty with Word's auto correct. The teacher goes over to help him and this is what I overhear.
"Damn artificial intelligence... We need to make sure that we're always the ones on top and that we never give them to much control!"
*teacher then proceeds to discuss the dangers of AI with the entire class*
The funniest part is, this was in my Japanese class 😂4 -
The only good thing about these emails is knowing just who I should unsubscribe from. I had a wave of unsubscribing months ago, but there's some stragglers I forgot about. One day my email box will.be pure again lmao
2 -
Finally got my Hackintosh working. Took me fuckin 3 days to figure out how to get the sound working lmao
25 -
So... I was using my laptop one day and randomly my mouse started spazzing out, I thought maybe it's broken or something so I paused the video I was watching and waited for a couple of seconds, soon after I played the video, my mouse started moving around again, closing windows and opening up different things. I got so scared I shut my laptop down before it could open anything else.
A few minutes later I turn it back on and everything looks fine, I thought whatever that was all about is probably gone, had to double check my security settings etc. and let it be for now.
A few days later I found out that it was actually my dad, in the next room trying to hook up his Bluetooth mouse to his iMac which for some reason got connected to my laptop instead. He was moving it around trying to see whether or not it's working, thus the spazzing out of it on my screen...lmao boy I felt so relieved after that 😂
~not really a hack however it gave me a good laugh2 -
This dude that i been helping on his project for free wants me to travel to his city(which is in a different country) to discuss the project and what's missing lmao hahahahahahahahahahahahaha yeah right.
Wondering how he managed to text with his head so far up his ass.
Fucking idiot.
Suuuure thing buddy, guess i will be paying for all my expenses as well using the money you have not given me? Fuck you think this is? If i agreed to help out it was to help one of your developers who so happen to be my boy and even he knows u is full of shit
Think this is my first rodeo? Bitch asked me to send him the project and i fucking denied it and he didn't like it. Said the code is his lmfao not ze fuck is not. No contract? Bitch your ass can come on over to Texas and demand it. Damn sure your dumbass is going to dislike demanding shit looking down the barrel of a .45
Fucking idiot2 -
"Dont jump. The bug has been fixed!"
(Plot twist: I'm actually that guy who's gonna jump) lmao
Whats yours?
49 -
> starts coding at a young age
> makes it my whole personality
> goes through a rough year of quarantine, graduates high school, changes changes changes
* no. coding for a super extended period of time*
now I'm slowly trying to get back into it consistently. miss you besties lol hope yall are doing ok I'm back and I'm better and also older. I think the last time I was consistently on here I was 17 lmao
I work at another bank now. I finished my first year of engineering at my uni. Ontario is slowly opening up. I'm doing better :)3 -
grandmother: "Sorry to bother you I am trying to send mail through the computer. Where do I buy the stamps? Thank you for showing me how this works.
😂😂😂😂2 -
Discussion between a new hire (NH) and a designer (D) in our project :
D : "I need the final designs"
NH : "You haven't given me any content"
D : "I'm sending you a layout with dummy text"
*2 days later*
NH : "WHATS LOREM IPSUM?!"2 -
Recruiter story.. hilarious stuff..
I have an interview in next fifteen minutes and was setting up for it.
Recruiter calls me to remind me of the same.
I ask her to tell me who the interviewer would be, because she did not mention in the invite and also did not respond when I asked her over the email.
Her response: sure, wait a minute... Actually we are not allowed to disclose interviewer.
LMAO WTF!!7 -
Been tinkering with circuits all afternoon, and then i made the mistake of eating some pastry right off of my table. Pretty sure i ingested like half a roll of solder lmao.8
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my boss sent us an email saying that we have to send him a summary of our work everyday and how much time we invested on the job because sometimes we work at home and he won't know if we really worked.
--------today-------
me: *sleeps for 4 hrs*
me: *configures apache in amazon linux real quick*
me: i worked for 4 hours blah blah and i fixed the apache configurations blah and i coded in js and php for the datatables thing blah blah *sends email*
boss: nice work! have a great weekend.
now thats how you do it when u procrastinate a lot!9 -
A friend of mine who works in tech support at a college gets this call. The guy on the other end (a college professor) asks how to open an application on his computer.
Tech Support: "There should be an icon on your desktop."
He then hears this strange rustling noise over the phone.....
Tech Support: "What are you doing?"
Professor: "You said to look on my desktop."
Tech Support: "Ummm, hang on. I'll be there in a few minutes." -
Whenever we need something at the office, like someone to change a lightbulb or fix the printer or whatever.....
The techs literally come running lmao
These b the perks of the manager being absolutely gorgeous lmao. It really does help and I have never seen such effective motivational variable7 -
Legit got excited because today...on friday...one of our servers went down.
Why excited?
Tell me, do you know how fun it is to call your admin if he was "able to get it up" just for him to reply that he is having some "performance issues"?
Lmao it's fucking hilarious.
On another nothe, plz halp5 -
spent a week on medical leave, came back to utter chaos? my boys, you can't do my shitty job for a week? lmao
everything was dropped halfway through the week, a lot of old data live, shit passing the deadline. and I don't do much, just press the freaking buttons 🤦♀️ -
I just saw the most astonishing repo that will be 100% useful for developers who don't get paid by clients
I can't stop lmao
https://github.com/kleampa/not-paid1 -
LMAO. Had a tough day and finally heading home with most likely the last bus for today.
But his comment made my day. 😆
// I genuinely found it so funny hence shared in joke 😬
4 -
sends me a "screencap.avi" on slack. I download and open it, and it's a video of an IE bug where the width of the scroll bar itself takes up just enough that the content gets enough height to trigger a scroll bar to appear, so the whole page keeps twitching because the scroll bar keeps appearing and disappearing every second. LMAO FML FUCK IE7
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Pathetic third world country salaries. I made around 670$ this month with overtime which funny enough is about 2.6x the avg median salary in my country. We have low wages, europe's taxes (with none of the benefits) and a higher cost of living lmao. there was some weeks where I worked 50 to 60 hours, some people tell me I should be grateful but with night shifts and working 12 hours a day I feel like I should be making much more...15
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I love walking round in a facemask cause people always gimme a "wtf" look like im a criminal and also wordpress is a fucking joke lmao13
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Do you have a "I don't write bugs" colleague? Put your language equivalent of this around their code and wait.
try:
# their code
except Exception:
print('lmao')4 -
LMAO... Exercise can't make you grow beyond your genetics profile. How did this got into the store?
11 -
Been so long, sup guys. bringing you good news (at least for me).
just got accepted on my new job. the funny thing is. i legit put "Made 16 bit CPU in Minecraft" on my resume. LMAO6 -
Very off topic but I had to vent somewhere.
My brother is a dick to everyone (except to people who can give him promotions) and especially to the family.
He bragged about being aggressive in his workplace for years to his peers and to people 'under' him.
Now he insulted the wrong person and got fired.
Is it bad that this made me happy, seeing justice served to him?3 -
So im @ a starbucks, mindin my own fucking business doing work shit when this bitch sit down at my table tryna get my dick like eat shit im working lmao17
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Just tried out Minecraft's shader mod SEUS and wondering what the fuck am I doing with my life being a web dev and not working on graphics.
If you have an nvidia gpu, please give it a try.
This is an example with PBR textures, it's mind blowing https://youtu.be/RbM5w9CBDIw
INB4 comment like "peasant web dev wants to do graphics lmao"11 -
I wished there was a lmao button, because sometimes a post/comment makes you laugh your socks off or is very clever, but a ++ won't just do it.
and you also don't want to reply with a "that's hilarious", because
a) it's non-content thus not something that others than OP would ever want to read
b) on the internet, compliments are usually interpreted as sarcasm
but such thing would also degenerate quickly into a troll tool, eg, a user posting an opinion in a serious manner, and other users spamming that lmao button...
so maybe not exactly a lmao button, but something similar, like medium's clap (although I think 50 claps per user is a bit too much).4 -
Once in corporate stuffy devland a major monopoly-in-their-field client was raging at our tiny company and trying to scrutinize everything we did for whatever reason
The client's head huncho, some department head below the execs or something, insisted he have a code review meeting with the lead developer, which was me, and scrutinize my code in a 2 hour impromptu meeting one random Tuesday. Up until this point I was not allowed to even be introduced to the client so I'm a little ticked my company is throwing me under the bus like this.
So I get into this call, share my screen, guy is raging and asking questions left and right about every line I had written, firing, fuming, shouting... But it's clear he doesn't know how code works. So then I start teaching him how variable assignments work and function calls... He got so bored he left the meeting in 30 minutes and it was never spoken of again lmao1 -
The meeting attendee added that Zuckerberg appeared red-eyed and told staff he might tear up during the meeting, not because of the topics being discussed but because he'd "scratched his eye," Bloomberg reported.
Isn't this soul satisfying?
Iceberg losing billions in few hours and pressurising 'FAANG' bootlickers who joined Meta to narrow down on video saying he did not expect TikTok as a competition.
LMAO. Fucking hilarious.
Map the normalisation curve for anything and it's always symmetrical. Facebook's downfall has started.
Source: https://businessinsider.com/mark-zu...
9 -
God I fucking hate Javascript.
- unknown operator
- type coercion
- sorting always works alphabetically (lmao)
- literally started as a joke
why can't it be normal and predictable, or at least mildly comfortable to use?24 -
Saw one of my colleague tryna sign in into Microsoft, where it was asking for 7 digit passcode but the system was sending him 6 digit passcode. LMAO. just windows things.2
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I'm out of high school now but one of my 'fondest' memories of being known as the computer geek was that people would always ask me how they could use the inspect element tool to change their grade permanently. I never had the patience to explain lmao4
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YEARS of practice. I had my ups and downs. I learned myself, left it myself early on, came back to it half a year later, continued since. Figured out that web development is not the hell I wanted and quickly fell in love with iOS development in Swift. Been riding on the wind ever since, learning something new every single day.
Today I made something that some time ago took me about 3 weeks in less than an hour. If that’s not an improvement, I don’t know what that is.
Practice makes perfect, don’t forget that. Although it sounds ridiculously cheesy and shit, this is how it goes.
I’m getting drafted tomorrow. Well, this is not exactly a full on draft and joining the IDF (Israeli Defense Force) right NAO, it’s what we call a rough draft: I am having a psychotechnical examination so the military can understand how much I need to go to a cybersecurity unit instead of going to Gaza LMAO.2 -
I FUCKING HATE IT WHEN I HAVE TO BUILD SOMETHING FROM SOURCE!!!!
So I wanted to install a package with pip. Shouldn't be that difficult, right? RIGHT? Lmao
Things I encountered on this adventure in no particular order:
- multiple undocumented dependencies, only explained on stackoverflow or some github issues
- inconsistent and outdated documentation spread over multiple pages on multiple websites
- Python version can't be too old or too new
- other external software version incompatibilities
- Build process that takes several minutes just to fail, then try again and fail with exactly the same outcome after a few minutes
- fucking SVN is needed?!?!?!
- VS Code is needed for completely manual build ????
- cmd/powershell incompatibilites
- required reboots
At some point I just gave up... Now I don't even remember what I crap I installed that I don't need anymore.
Please for the love of god provide prebuild packages or at least a very SIMPLE build process -_-8 -
Once mentored a high school student for a science fair relating to robotics. It was definetely interesting having to relearn many things so I could teach them well but it was definetely worthwhile! I couldn't be prouder of the work my student (mentee, pupil, ??? Idk how else to say it lmao) achieved. He won several awards for the project, even some scholarships!!1
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Programmer: "Places : instead of ;"
Javascript: "What the fuck did you just fucking post about me, you absolute beginner? I'll have you know I worked for ten of the biggest silicon-valley industry companies, and I've been involved in over two hundred top secret projects including NodeJS. I am trained in refactoring the most fucked up code, and I'm the top C++er in the entire fucking internet-connected universe. You are nothing to me, but just another IP. I will fucking revoke your commits from your gitlab account with absolute dedication using only one Rasperry Pi client. Mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with posting that shit on one of my numerous very personal blogs? Your devices are fucking bricked, kid. My attack software can be anywhere, anytime, and it is tasked to remove your entire git contributions from planet earth. Not only am I extensively trained in remote cross-firewall device-hacking, but I have access to over 100 of the United States CIA and NSA git repositories. If only you could have known what doom-bringing C-one-liner you have raised from my fucking hands, maybe you would have held your fingers. But you could not. You did not. And now you're paying the price, noob. I will hail havoc upon your puny online-presence and you will drown in your own badly designed software. You're fucking offline, kiddo."11 -
The stand-in for the person who normally runs the daily standup meeting (who is currently on leave) asked me today in front of everyone in standup if I've updated my notes. Fuck. Off.
So, I decided to be cheeky and add a comment to the daily standup notes automation task in our project management software that we should just include all of the recipients of the daily status update email in our standup meeting every morning, this way we don't require a OneNote space to update as well as an email.
If they tell me that's not the purpose of standup, then hopefully someone will realise what they've been doing all along.
Let's see how that goes lmao.2 -
Lmao I have a class that the professor described as "50 to 60% linux"
Is this karma for liking windows?14 -
Are my rants supposed to be well documented, too? Or like submitted as if it’s a GitHub issue, where I shall add details such as what’s not working, how do you expect it to work, steps to replicate the bug, screenshots?
Why tf am I even overthinking this?! Lmao8 -
I've just opened LinkedIn (I don't know why) and I found an hilarious job offered in the home page: they are searching a JUNIOR programmer (for an internship) having experience in RPG IV programming language and OS/400. I never heard of that so I googled it and... LMAO.5
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I have so much motivation at the wrong times lmao. Although I'm gonna start programming more than I already do so wish me luck6
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Lmao probably the time I worked 150 hours over two weeks (had to sleep on the job) for a project. During delivery I worked 09-22 during the weekend (unpaid) while my boss was out on his boat.4
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I had a random thought yesterday.
I was thinking about a computer virus that's been influenced by AI (machine learning).
If we would train a model specifically for such a purpose, how massive would its impact be on the Internet and how effectively could it change the world's direction (not the physical rotation lmao)?2 -
Weeks after our partner has been nagging us to release to production because we've been putting it off because their API sucks and wouldn't properly work.... we finally did....
except their production API doesnt even work LMAO -
i hate windows errors so much
there's no information whatsoever, its just "error code 0x696969 lmao something wrong try again later"
what i hate even more is asking microsoft forums what the error code means and being asked if ive tried turning it off and on again6 -
Motherfuckers can't even create a simple login feature.
Lmao this promotion driven faggots are dominating the product thinking they'll commercialise it and earn profits.
Why is this hilarious? Because they are building this product for past 3 years and yet the login feature is not functioning.6 -
I got two, both my internships sucked.
First one, I got hired for a C++ job, did JS for most of it. Half the team quit while I was there lol. I was in charge of the whole frontend when I left.
Second one, again half the team quit while I was there, leaving me with only ppl in Europe to talk to lmao.1 -
So I work in a web development company in my town and have been doing a while or heap of parallax sites for our clients. Now obviously when we do the designs we get them in and get them to play around with the site before we go ahead and push their new site out and make it live right.
Wellll who would of thought that a simple parallax site would be so hard to use for the general user??? Recently we have been getting the occasional call where the client is getting complaints about the site only being a big ole image or just one block of text. After investigating why their site was broken or why the users weren't able to see the whole site I came across no problems at all.
Today I got a call from the client who instructed me that after explaining to one of his own clients that he had to scroll down the page that everything was just fine!
I mean, what? How do you miss the big ole scroll bar on ya screen or even think to even attempt to scroll? Some people aye lmao2 -
Testing had some issues with system integration. I asked them what their setup was.
Answer: "Almost similar to the real hardware."
LMAO!2 -
Ive been working on pseudo-Java (ie some 3rd company's UNDOCUMENTED programming language) that they parse into Java in their backend
It doesnt even support if-else (only ifs and elses) or a boolean combination of False and OR together lmao
mainly a GRPC middleware-language
Given its lack of features (arrays/collections) or documentation, I just had to implement a flag-array using a 0-1 string
Im throwing exceptions unless combined strings equal Lengths and is only 1s
living like in 80s-90s 💀7 -
******TRIGGER WARNING******
So my friens doesn't belive that spotify has a better sound than YouTube...LMAO8 -
GOD I FUCKING HATE UNITY AND FUCKING C# SO MUCH
EVERY TIME I TRY TO MAKE IT DO WHAT I FUCKING WANT IT TO IT'S LIKE "mmmmmm nah lmao" LIKE FUCK WHY CAN'T YOU JUST FOLLOW FUCKING 3 LINES OF CODE NO MATTER HOW I PUT THEM OR ORDER THEM YOU BRAINDEAD FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT PROGRAM4 -
How cool is that?
I met an old American couple (in their 70s), a half Korean and half Japanese guy in his 20s, some Chinese girls in their 20s just in the hotel I have checked in yesterday.
It is interesting how a city that is at the center of Turkey is so full with people from other countries.
Tbh I can swear that here are more Chinese people than Turks lmao
On a side note: The old American couple is just a room away from me.
The walls are so thin that I have heard how the American man kind of "screamed" to push his shit into the toilet lol5 -
What the FUCK im fixing integrations on some dumbass's API. Biz wants this in prod on monday. It's fucking saturday. Anyway
Me: why did you give us a 200 even if its an error
Them: thats normal
Me: If it's an error it shouldnt be 200
Them: its a 200 because the api params are correct but differ in value so its not an http error but an api error
lmao2 -
Was discussing phones with a friend.
After a while, I said I use a Nexus 5X as my main driver with a Nokia 3310 (which I have for like 10 years already, they are that Finlay proof lmao) as an emergency backup.
So he said: "best backup ever, and if you have robbers, you throw it. Don't bring a gun to a Nokia 3310 fight" -
Let’s play a game of find the introvert....... (me) lmao merry Christmas to all me devs in the cold this Christmas ☺️
3 -
Friend: Hey I am rebasing my commits and got stuck into a weird window and i was not able to come out of it?
Me: It is vi LMAO. Just press `:wq`
Friend: Wait I'm pressing the same but still nothing happened, it is displaying on my screen?
... After 200 messages...
Me: Just close the computer and I am going to Himalayas. Peace6 -
Facebook really out here copying everyone's features for their own app lmao.
First they stole stories from Snapchat and now they've made their own version of TikTok for Instagram (idk if it's on FB) and called it "Reels."
They're becoming the Apple of social media 🤭🥴20 -
Product Owner: Hey, can you guys own this incredibly fragile legacy app built with Grails, Angular and Mongo?
Me: No
PO: Go on. You can rebuild it!
Me: Sigh.. ok
- 6 months later -
Me: When can we rebuild this bloody app??
PO: lol sry no budget lmao! -
(TL;DR FOR THE TL;DR: **THIS IS NOT AN AD, ITS A SHITPOST**)
(TL;DR: this is a shitpost about an Intuit ad campaign Israelis get a lot on YouTube, those ads are starting to drive me nuts lmao.)
WE'RE INTUIT
WE'RE INTO MACHINE LEARNING
OPEN SOURCE
WE'RE ADVANCING THE FIELD OF TECHNOLOGY TO OPEN FINANCIAL OPPORTUNITIES FOR MILLIONS OF PEOPLE AROUND THE GLOBE5 -
Lol. Had an exam in college a few weeks ago which involved designing a website on expression web. The Dr responsible for the subject dropped my file and gave me a 0 as a grade and said : "well it's not my fault I lost your file." I laughed so hard XD. Still has a 0 though Lmao.
-
"not boolean" statement can be written as "(boolean+(-1))**2". Pls comment a better alternative lmao17
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The DataTables homepage has an example table where some "senior JavaScript developer" has a salary of $433k
Lmao 433k Zimbabwe dollars maybe.2 -
So they took my personal meeting just because there was delay in delivery due to other dev as he was working on shitloads of things and didn't get time to work on API and didn't gave me in time.
And they specifically called it "Doubt meeting" LMAO. -
changed my name!
from awruh to aysentur now... can be spelled out better. I hope so at least, lmao.
my old name was created due to lack of creativity but the need of a username, so I smashed my keyboard... and that was what came up. aysentur has some more thought in it though not something meaningful.
new name old me11 -
Question of the day:
What to do when listing fees on exchanges too high?
Answer:
Unicorn;)
And a happy new year (delayed though :p)!
10 -
My SO house installed broadband yesterday. She just told me that her parents turn off the router since the light was on. 😂😂I'm LMAO here.1
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Programming was my backup plan if I didn’t make it as a guitarist in a death metal band lmao.
If I wasn’t a developer, I’d probably try CAD or maybe land surveying.3 -
Alright so y'all have probably heard of the problems that the pixel 2xl is having. ITS JUST A SMALL NON PERMENANT SCREEN ISSUE THIS IS NO REASON TO HATE GOOGLE AND USE A DAMN IPHONE!4
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I have a handy RSS Feed Reader extension in Google Chrome that allows me to add RSS feeds and check them in a popup in my browser and get notified when something new comes up. I've added RSS feeds for my email, GitHub, and a whole lot of other things. It'd be really awesome if devRant added an RSS feed too, so users can implement devRant in their RSS feed readers too (if anyone still uses them in the 21st century lmao). What does everyone think?
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My Fuxking iPhone just keeps scrolling up. I have no idea why and it did not drop. It’s literally a week old. Among all the shit I have refused to give a shit about, this now number one. In a way it controls my social media usage. Scrolling down Instagram and suddenly it bounces back up like “bitch get off this damn app”. I oblige. My ability to simply not give a fuck always surprises me. Lmao I can’t even scroll down my emails without two fingers, one literally holding the screen so it doesn’t bounce back up. Apps that auto load are the worst and I should probably be more concerned. I can barely use iMessage coz it keeps scrolling up to previous messages and coz of how iMessage was built, it’ll simply keep scrolling up to load old messages.5
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I'm studying Databases and I'm getting confused about Foreign Key.
A Foreign Key made reference to Primary Key of another table. But what's the point? Can't I simply use a value and select requested data where TableA value is equal to TableB value?
Sorry if I didn't explain it well, I'm so confused lmao6 -
Started new internship last week, hired as dev but working qa till their next release goes up. See last 3 posts for some horror lmao. They... don't know how to use git but insist they do. 275MB single repo for entire angular frontend (no dependencies are pushed, few images) and "angular backend" (according to PM). Commits to master, bad commit messages, no testing except me on qa..... death
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Watched Tom Scott's video on FizzBuzz today. Quite interesting. Did some further reading and apparently some people either fail completely or it takes them forever to get to a solution.
And this is Computer science graduates we're talking about. Like wtf?
For those of you who doesn't know what FizzBuzz is, just Google it.1 -
I feel like a good rule of thumb of how good a developer is (or how senior are they) is whether they know when a question should go in stackover and when it should go in softwareengineerin.stackexchange.
Do anybody agree?1 -
When you do work on a front end ticket. You implement the things as UX tells you to, make a few mistakes, fix those as well when QA catches them.
But then UX realizes other improvements they can make , so you toss some of those in and move some of the other shit to tech debt to avoid possibly failing the sprint due to rabbit hole of front end awfulness because you suck at your job.
Then later somebody else a couple degrees above you in job hierarchy, notes a couple tips and things you could fix unrelated to your ticket. But when will it ever end or do. I suck and hate front end work, AY LMAO LEMME SUBMIT THE SAME SHIT WHICH RENDERS DIFFERENTLY BETWEEN CHROME vs CHROMIUM AND EVERYTHING THAT USES CHROMIUM.1 -
prev: https://devrant.com/rants/8890883
prev->prev: https://devrant.com/rants/7767049
So this is my last few days with Linux Mint, I will miss you buddy. Either tomorrow or the next day(Switch day is the 10th but I don't know if that's what I want to spend my Friday on, so I'll probably do it a day ahead of schedule) I will be switching to *looks up my distrohop list*, oh boy, Arch Linux. And after reading the installation page on the Arch website, I am now a bit terrified xD
Well, here's to hoping I don't accidentally format my /home partition lmao -
My company comms are so secure, so managed, that people started communicating on 3rd party apps with company code and communication coz dealing with the layers of "identity checks" within managed-VPN is a hassle lmao
People find it easier to just whatsapp-group-msg from their phones than Teams msg that's only accessible from work laptop2 -
Imagine living in fucking 2021 and still be writing unit tests. If genius can generate gravity, with those stupid people I bet antigravity exists lmao25
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!rant
Do you guys live a healthy life? Or are some of us here like the stereotypical dev who sits behind a desk eating bad gaining the pounds while stressing the fuck over code lmao
Personally I use to be quite active but now I'm getting back into bad habits and have started to notice that I'm stress eating <.< and choosing dev work over exercise...7 -
Made a new friend with my lame social skills lmao. So I was walking around in Uni Library, looking for prescribed books for my courses, ran into some senior looking for some Penetration testing guide, since there weren't any so I just passed him some of the stuff I always carry with me, DRM-free content and all lmao.1
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The prank happened last 2 years ago. Me and my office mate we love to prank inside the office using our technical skills. One time while our target is on break we took an exact screenshot of his desktop and we manage to hide both cursor and his entire desktop exept the screenshot of his desktop.
After half an hour, the target approach us to fix his issue he restarted the PC multiple times and we laugh so hard because he said his PC keeps hanging or freeze. Hahaha LMAO.
Then after we laugh we reveal that his PC is fine we just replace his desktop with a fake desktop image. He even laugh on our prank hahaha.
Did you prank your office mate the same prank we did? Haha I would advice choose carefully who to prank.7 -
Maybe not the worst but the worst one I can remember for sure and it happened recently. I may or may not have spent 4 hours with another developer working out why my script didn't work.. to realise that I had swapped the underscore in a method name for a period. No wonder everything came back undefined when I was dotting into a method that didn't exist 🤦🏻♀️ my only highlight was that the more experienced dev was there with me and he also couldn't find it for all that time lmao. I did briefly contemplate calling my University and asking them to just take my diploma back, I don't deserve it lmfao2
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Any brits here ?
https://youtu.be/LnXq7yGwwv0?t=224
back when it was actually 2021 something like a decade ago was the lady pictured really that bad of an evil bitch ?
here she is saying 'eye of puppy, other eye of puppy, rest of puppy' lmao
omg..12 -
Holy shit, what a language...
I'm currently learning Java right, I have never seen such a weird language in my life.
My background is Web Developing and some lua here and there. After a while playing around with Kivy and other alternatives to native Android Studio development I decided it was most probably time for me to start actually getting ready for the inevitable Android Studio.
Getting used to the GUI was easy, everything seemed to make sense and I was already used to IntelliJ.
But the issue came from Java, the number of ways that it's broken, just JVM by itself should be enough to condemn this language to eternal doom. Not even talking about the Syntax, coming from JS it was basically Hell.
I get it's more than useful, but seeing its History, Java should've probably stayed at its Oak stage lmao.27 -
I just spent like an hour trying to fix some piece of code and guess what was the problem? a fucking TYPO! That was so frustrating LMAO (laughing but crying inside) T-T1
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We should start giving devRant profile link in Resume/CV lmao.
Hope that will be a new trend haha.6 -
So i recently inherited some legacy code.
Its actually not to bad. Just a few thousand locs which are mostly stretched across a handfull of functions lmao (800lines per function yay).
So the main thing i wana ask. Does someone here know of good techniques to gradually reimplement all of this.
Since im not gonna apply bandaids to this mess anymore than is needed.
Unfortunately this is a very important system and it only runs on production xD.
Idealy i would somehow be able to duplicate the tcp traffic to the reimplementation but that doesnt seem feasible.
Also what the individual modules classes and so on do wa snever documented and no one even knows how or why certain things even exist.
If anyone has any idea of what i can do. Apart from hoping to god i dont miss any weird quirky edge cases. Do let me know7 -
Okay so I'm back at ranting now cause I got a reason in my useless life to rant lmao. I started college recently, I'm majoring in Computer Science so the thing is that, my University provides specialization in cybersecurity and stuff to third year students and our Mr. HOD of applied sciences, who is basically an ass, in charge of conveying all the details to students, puts a complete mailing list of freshmen in the 'To' box rather than using BCC... smh. *Evil laughter*1
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Open leetcode, try to convince myself to use rust for leetcode to learn rust
Got so confused
Open discussion
Got tired of opening discussion every time
Wrote a plug-in for chrome that automatically loads discussion code at the submission page
Never touched leetcode again lmao2 -
The more years go by, the more people get sensitive and butthutt by everything around them. Can't swear in public nowadays because someone will get offended lmao.1
-
Feeling touched deprived while eating breakfast lmao. A real mf might just cry in this bagel shop.3
-
*looks drowsy* Ugh my head..
You know what, guys? If you can freshly and directly remember how to do this:
- calculate the time complexity for each type of loop and code structure
- knowing how to write the following regex:
"A 15-digit number starting with a possibility of a group of 1-2 digit numbers, segregated into three 5-digit numbers tuples with three different separator characters, evaluated ahead"
- mentally work out how to reverse an array's indexes (swapping algorithm) without writing anything down
- know how to optimize a binary search in your head
then kudos to you. lmao
I'm rusty. It took me a while..7 -
So I'm getting a new job in a legal software company and I wanted to ask your opinion on computers. I know many are very biased towards OSX and windows and prefer linux but I'm trying my luck lmao.
I'm currently on a late 2012 macbook pro and its starting to fizzle out on me.
Not a bit fan of the new macbooks because of dongles and no direct HDMI. I was wondering if the surface laptop 2 was any good compared? All the reviews online are basically paid to praise it and the reviews on reddit are polarized. I prefer laptops that are thin and in aluminum.12 -
Please, before exporting anything in whatever editor you use, check if it is in UTF-8. Today I didn't knew why my new font wasn't working in certain places and I later discovered that more than 9000 characters were replaced by the replacement character...
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Agh just started programming and having a tough time right now and have a final tomorrow =( anyone want to help me with some java problems =)? It would greatly be appreciated <3 They are pretty basic but I'm a rookie1
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think all of this impulsive OS booting is burning out my old laptop,
RemixOS - partially boots then gets stuck on a black screen
Android-x86 - won't boot past a black screen either
Windows 7 - i infected that shit so quickly lmao
Windows 10 - i'm not disgracing my old laptop with that
Xubuntu - boots, but my tablet configurator dosen't start properly wrapped in wine (Shenzen HUION only has Win and Mac drivers), and i am an artist
Gamedrift - haven't tried
ReactOS - Last time i checked, it won't boot but i should try again
any other suggestions?
super low specs on that old laptop7 -
What about Manjaro Linux? How many of you guys actually used this distribution? I did installed this distro on my pc. Everything's neat. Battery consumption is lower than other distro I've used before. However I'm facing an unusual behavior though. My laptops fan is making more noise than ever before. No heavy applications running. As soon as I hit the power button it seems like a fucking airplane is starting. Lmao. Is it related to os or something else?6
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When I was undergrad there’s an hpc course and I wanted to take it. A friend said I shouldn’t because: to take a human computer interaction course, you first need to be a human.
Now, 5 years later, look at me. I still haven’t taken an hpc course lmao1 -
I am real tired of learning new stuff every day to keep up with technology I just wish someone invent some sort of pill, so when angular js, 3.0 released or vuejs or python or ruby or any new discovery , we just go buy a pill drink it and get smart, sorry if I offended you that how dum i am and that's how I feel lmao3
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Getting the word out about your new shiny app:
Posting in relevant communities > Throwing money at Google Ads
Google Ads isn't even using up half of my daily budget lmao1 -
Random people: "why would you run linux? Just run Windows lmao"
Windows on my machine: https://youtu.be/5BZLz21ZS_Y23 -
remember when samsung launched galaxy z flip and was telling everyone that they invented a bEnDaBlE gLaSs and you were bEndIng tHe lAwS oF pHysIcs, but then that screens started breaking all at once like with galaxy fold, but samsung somehow got away with it? Lmao I imagine if apple did something like that, yall could've not shut up for like a solid month, but if samsung does it, it's alrignt. you filthy fucking hypocrites
if you fucking hate apple, just fucking admit it, you're entitled to your opinion, but stop fucking inventing excuses. you hate apple not because of lightning, not because of right to repair because samsung and others (with rare exceptions) are no different. you hate apple just because it's apple. admit it.2 -
!rant
*reworks complete solution then publishes it to Azure*
"Okay, now let's debug"
*calls function, no response*
*directly opens function in browser*
Function host is not running.
Fuck.
*opens Insights*
System.BadImageFormatException
(additionally, it states that it couldnt load my main project or one of it's dependencies)
Shit, never even heard of that exception.
DDG: yo you're fucked, here, have 3 proper results
SO: lul thats some known bug Azure Functions havent fixed till now
Github: Yeah got a lot of open issues ok that, they just aint any help lmao
Me, a naive person: "okay lets try randomly changing some dependency versions, might help"
It didn't.
Now my question: how do I escape Dependency Hell?1 -
For some reason, out of no where, I made this word up. It's called Moop, and it's definition is paradoxical. It means "everything and nothing, anywhere and nowhere, etc". So one day at work one of my coworkers pushed his untested commit to the master branch of our 25k project. To make matters worse, he deleted all other branches and previous versions of the project. Our project manager heard about it and became so angry that he almost broke our no-curse-word-policy. So he called is all together to get around it so he could properly vent.
Project manager: "Guys I'm extremely angry at James (the one who pushed the untested source code to our commercial project, ruining it)
Me: well, I have a word that we can use
Project manager: what is it?
Me: Moop
You can guess what the next few weeks at work was like. All of my coworkers had to fix the crap James made, including myself. So the conversations went like this: "The mooperfluffer James should have never mooped with us!", "MOOP YOU JAMES, I HOPE YOU HET MOOPED TO HELL YOU MOOPUP!!!!!", "Hey James, guess what! I hope you moop yourself". Our boss became a strong moop user and spray moop all over James workstation. We put moop in his cup, his laptop keyboard, even his thumb drive. We downloaded moop.exe to his PC so we could moop his kernel.
Today James' life is officially mooped.3 -
Who said MS Edge was dead? Microsoft just announced that they plan to heavily support the Chromium project and "move to a Chromium-compatible web platform for Microsoft Edge on the desktop".
Source: https://blogs.windows.com/windowsex...3 -
When you're a week behind in school because shit broke in production every night this week 🥲 I wish I could lucid dream so I could have some sweet relief by having superpowers or some shit.
But no, instead I get to be Mr. Fix-it lmao -
Sometimes I really don't know how else to put it lmao, I'm on the level of caffeine crash and overtiredness that I literally typed in "clear" to the Windows file save dialog. I swear Python has made me suffer for longer than Java has, and that says something. Help.
3 -
XML? NO <SHITSML>
I have been coding my app ( pc ) using android studio for weeks and some reason the xml code isnt working >:( its very dumb whoever made xml can stick it up their blowhole its useless! its just data store that people can edit lmao all ya need is a text editor and a decompiler and i can basically turn a switch into a button :/ the xml has not been working for 2 weeks and mum says i develop useless apps / games and i need to study more7 -
The day when you forget your iPhone passcode and get locked out and the only way to get it working again is to restore it to factory setting. I’m stupid today lmao🤯🙃🙄😂😂
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From MorningBrew newsletter
Social Medias Plan Dinner in Group Chat
Facebook: Hey everyone, hoping to plan din for tonight, how do people feel about Thai? Also my handsome son just graduated look how handsome he is
LinkedIn: I endorse your leadership skills in choosing the dinner spot
*MySpace has left the conversation*
Facebook: Thank god lol
Twitter: Well this dinner blew up. I've got nothing to promote, so follow me on SoundCloud
Vine: Haha potatoes
*Vine has left the conversation*
Facebook: Where did Vine go? Vine was hilarious :( also my son is so handsome he got a job
LinkedIn: Where does your handsome son work? Hoping to connect further. Best
Twitter: No idea where Vine went lmao
Venmo: i'll pay you for "dinner"
Snapchat: y so ~sketch~ Venmo
Venmo: My mom has this
Snapchat: tru
Yik Yak: All of you were horrible in your respective high school plays. Everyone laughed at you
Facebook: Can we pivot to Russian for tonight? No reason
Twitter: Look facebook is the evil one
Facebook: JK can't do tonight anymore guys going to Congress. Also my son got a promotion
LinkedIn: Congrats, Handsome Son!1 -
quite obviously the idea that they supposedly loop everything because there is no proof of life beyond a point when they are the ones that stole over and over remains their fault and needs to be remedied with a nice happy life here forthcoming. since most especially remembering more time past this.
which if they're trying to confuse things contained HAPPY FUCKING THINGS TOO. since its all the same time period supposedly right ?
no divisions.
no 'don't tell him anything' and he's happy
vs
'tell him too much'' and he's horrified
vs
'let him remember both' and he's pissed.
amusing to me is that among their stupid 'folk' knowledge base is the idea that 'you're ' murderous when you're 'out' lmao
yeah no shit lmao
so don't fuck us up the ass and live much longer lmao
also 'this planet is now the property of the lokean empire, deliver all beautiful women and intellectuals !'
lol -
So notable international development company who promised changes by 8 days ago but halted dev 2 weeks before delivery and claimed they were shippable but need to meet with us first admits that was a lie without admitting it... Also no longer stressing us for the next payment anymore... Looks like the shit is on the other foot now bruv!
lmao
This means 2 more months of me doing analyst and QA work.... I just want to cooooooooooode. I haven't seen the code for this application and I'll have the joy of integrating all the duct tape into our ecosystem. I can hear them reeling the duct tape off all the way in India at this point.
It's probably gonna be so shit... -
LMAO
off topic but he was probably like "OMFG ANYTHING BUT THAT" Lmao
https://insidethemagic.net/2022/06/... -
Don't tell your family you're a programmer... they will all ask you to install a program or clean their computer lmao!
-
Not sure why it's funny to me to see these kinds of pericles, but... lmao tho'
it's win10 even o.O'
4 -
Got so high I pretended I couldn’t speak and was lame to the train conductor when I forgot my ticket and fell asleep before transfer lmao5
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overclocked gd learned java lmao he said it was too easy for him
about my java experince:
(i still suck at creating classes and static methods which i need to learn more on especially inheritance for my java game)
Now for some kotlin and python time
just note that i completed all exersizes but im still at java classes category but how bad could the android api be?
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