Fucking Methods starting with "Get" and return is void.

void GetTheFuckOut()

How do you even come up with shit like this?

If you name your methods a, b, c, x, z, etc

Then I hate you.

If the idiot wants me to help then use proper method names!

Public class UnnamedChild extends Person implements Mirziteh {

public UnamedChild(String fName){
super();
this.fName = fName;
}

//methods removed for brevity
}

Sad story about refactoring.
Programmer: I cleaned up the codes, extract reusable methods, reduced repetitive code and improve overall readability and maintainability.
Manager: why the page still display the same.
Programmer: ...

Me 6 months ago: "This is fucking genius. Beauutiful. Look at that code. See how I did this? Wow, I love it. Fuck I'm good"

Me Now: " What. the. ffuck? Wtf is this? What was I thinking? Goddamn. "

*reduces 3 methods and 37 lines to 2 methods and 8 lines*

Well at least it shows I'm still learning.

Me using CSS to refurbish an old site...

1. Find bug
2. Try 3 methods of fixing
3. All fail
4. Tell yourself you're trying for the LAST time then you'll go on to something else
5. End up trying 5 more times
6. Repeat step 4 20 times
7. Cry
8. Finally take a break
9. Return next day, try another method, it works instantly

FML!

Today I was searching Android docs and found something interesting:

To write Android log statements, you use the android.util.Log class with the following methods:

Log.v()

Log.d()

...

Log.wtf() 😮😮😮

According to Google it seems to mean "What a Terrible Failure".

WTF?!?!?!

Java: Ok, any ideas on how to make women more interested in us ?
.
.
.
C++: Make more exceptions ?
Python: Redefine our methods ?
C: Stop treating them like objects ?
.
.
.
*Java furious at C*
.
.
.
*Java throws C out of the building*

If you're a developer that enjoys 200+ line methods with 5+ return points, and literal strings all over the place, please punch yourself, hard.

Just spoke with another teams developer. (She's using Java)

Her: so we get a json object from your service, I want an array
Me: well that's not what you said in the specs... And it's not hard since it's just a Map
Her: what Map? It's JSonObject I need an Array
Me: give me the library your using..
Her: here...

I Google the documentation and methods and paste the link and the methods to use:

-length (she also wanted count)
-toJsonArray

This ain't JS, just use the . operator and go thru all the methods' docs... Or learn to use Google

NO JIMMY.
YOUR 45 IF/ELIF STATEMENTS ARENT FUCKIN A.I.
NOR ARE YOUR 25 METHODS THAT RETURN A STRING A FUCKIN BLOCKCHAIN

STOP FUCKIN USING EVERYWHERE THOSE FUCKIN WORDS
FUCK OFF

Had a friend who was forced to document his own code. He gave up after an hour of trying to figure out what methods 'somethingsomething()' and 'somethingsomething2()' did...

The only way to feel comfortable coding on PHP is using classes and methods, I feel like home (Java)

Just so you know.
In node js.
You can use emojis as methods names. For real.

FUTURE 😄

My boss has no idea what he is doing. Scary for a senior programmer, with 20 years of experience. The guy keeps calling methods statically, in a object oriented project. And can't understand why it won't work.

Me: Bro look, I have learnt so many things from the past couple of days.
-Introduction
-Data Types
-Variables
-Arrays
-Operators
-Control Statements
-Classes
-Methods
-Inheritance
-Packages
-Interfaces
-Exception Handing
-Multi-threaded Programming
-Enumerations
-Autoboxing
-Annotations
-Generics

My senior: Congrats on finishing up the basics
Me: Those were just basics???...///!!! 😜

When someone writes class names lowercase and methods uppercase in Java.

A big part of the code of my project is done in French

all but one small part, which is English. But uses also some French methods and names.

So when you have an error because you put "Objet" instead of "Object" because it's in French

Professor: Envision a person as an object, what methods would it have?
Student: Run
Prof: Yes, good example.
Other student: Jump
Prof: yes, people also do that
Me: Die
Prof: Well yes, but I'd prefer we don't take this any further

Reverse the given string without using inbuilt java methods... 😭😭😭😭

Every time you will get this question even when you have more than 6 yrs of experience 😡

Different girls follow different methods to slow down their ageing process --

Health trainer -- Exercise and Yoga
Normal girl -- Cosmetic products
Programmer girl -- Having a tattoo of Internet explorer

If naming classes, methods and variables in your (not english) native language seems like a good idea, please get another job.

Kinda dumb that HTML forms don't support all of the HTTP methods (Only GET and POST!)

Yesterday I had to ask a classmate what the arguments of a method were (no documentation).

He said: "Uhmm it doesn't matter in which order you put the arguments into the method?"

No more to say.

I've taken over a project with legacy code, this is one of the methods:

private bool areEqual(string value1, string value2)
{
return value1 == value2;
}

Also, the opening brackets are on a new line

Junior devs splitting methods be like

001 REM Code review

010 PRINT "Nitpick nitpick nitpick nitpick nitpick"
011 GOSUB REFACTOR

020 PRINT "This function is too complicated, break it up"
021 GOSUB REFACTOR

030 PRINT "Why do you have three methods for this? Put all the logic in one method."
031 GOSUB REFACTOR

040 GOTO 020
041 REM ARGH

998 PRINT "Looks good."
999 STOP

while(freeTime == true) {
if(iHavePlans == true)
waitUntilDone();
/*
* TODO: Fix bug that causes
* coding to call the gaming and
* relaxing methods so often...
*/
code();
}

Extension methods in C# are fucking genius.

Java would never.

Developers created IDEs with intelligent code completion and languages provide users with an annotation syntax to document their methods.

And then there is Python, nuking all the efforts of our ancestors by dynamic typing. And they are smug enough to call this laziness duck typing. "If it squawks like a duck, swims like a duck, walks like a duck its a duck".
Shit no, it ain't a duck because a fucking goose does all the same but is a mean bastard compared to a duck. You might pet a duck but only the craziest will attempt to pet a goose.

Fuck python and undocumented methods in particular!

My boss sucks really hard at English... I would not have a problem with it if he didn't insist on naming methods and variables with a non-sense English that he thinks is right...

Friday Eve: Closing eclipse project happily at work. Everything works sorta fine.

Monday morning: Opening eclipse project again. Everything is like i left it. "Main class could not be found."

What the fuck eclipse?

Sometimes I want to fuck customers with 30 samurai methods ! A few minutes ago, some one called me and asked me to make a website like Google for him with 500$ 😑

Php array methods, all of them, or should i say hash methods

They should fix them. I mean they should fix placing of callback and subject params, because.
I mean
array_filter(array, callback)
array_map(callback, array)

Or they should make array a object like js

Fuck inheritance.

Looking for variables and methods in inheritance chain is like walking in Thailand and looking for a girl hooker on a street full of ladyboys.

You can find one but you never know.

Can https be decrypted easily?
(Or even by spending some time)
Plus what other security methods banks apply to prevent theft of sensible data?
Do they encrypt data using thair own private key thet is changed automatically?

when I m pissed off I feel like changing all my api's public methods to private

I’ve become the person who I said I’d never be. Writing spaghetti code in spaghetti project instead of trying to refactor methods and classes where I’m adding new features.
Welp. They want it “yesterday” , they’ll have it yesterday.

But hey, the money’s good.

doUploadFile();
doActuallyUploadFile();
doReallyUploadFile();
doUploadFileToServer();

imagine calling these methods in this order so you can upload a file to the server

WORST: moved from Canada to France and went from a company with agile methods to one without methods.
A 8 months nightmare...

So much useless meeting, for no result
A drupal project... with a junior team with no drupal experience at all.
And a general "i don't give a fuck" feeling from everyone.

BEST: My new job. Building from scratch a Team with agile methods, backed by my hierarchy.

After 20 minutes refactoring code and changing methods, you realize you have been editing the wrong file -.-'

Found out today that the company wants to hire the consultant that thinks that unit testing is a waste of time, CI and code coverage metrics are useless, DI is mumbo-jumbo. But 500+ line procedural methods are fine, you just start the method with a small essay of a comment on what it does...

Friend: why do I get this error help

[I check the logs]

Me: uh,its a OOM, did you allocate enough memory for GC?

Friend: wait hold on

[changes a method]

[works]

Friend: I shouldn't use this experimental method

Me: Cool man blog it

I tried a few methods.

First osmosis. I would put several programming books under my pillow but that was just a pain in the neck.

Next I tried the TF/RQ methods. I would try to write some code not knowing anything about the language. When it didn't work I'd rage quit and flip the table. That ended with a pile of broken IKEA desks and a lot of spilled coffee. (RIP Coffee 😔)

Finally I sat down and came up with a problem I wanted to solve. I googled it, looked at answers. Tried the code myself, if it worked I'd go over it piece by piece so I could explain to anyone exactly what it did and why.

Honestly, learning to code just comes down to doing it and being fearless. The more curious you are, the more you'll learn.

When I realize that I can load DLLs into PowerShell and run methods from it.

!rant

I like where this is going, too bad arrow methods are not in the language yet like in C#

Managed to reduce a file from 1155 to 288 lines just by converting the 50 or so methods all calling the same API library with similar setups to use one line helper functions.

Dfox and trogus I'd love to subscribe but are there going to be additional payment methods? As in, at least some people on here do not have Google play services and although i do, that's solely for notifications, I'd love to remove that stuff.

Barnes and Noble stepped up their organization methods...

We learned Java in school this year. Everyone who did not comply to the coding style defined in some stone-age books, got a bad grade, including me, who rather used a "normal" style everyone uses. They thought us this:
CLASSNAMES, Constants, MethodNames, VariableNames, etc.
Worse than that, they used german names for pretty much everything including classes, variables and methods.

Nothing like writing summary comments on methods to make you feel smart. It's like:

<summary>
ObviousWellNamedMethod is a method that does obvious well named thing
</summary>
<param name="WellNamedObviousParameter">Represents the well named obvious thing used in the obvious well named method</param>

I hate coding standards sometimes.

Had a classmate who loved the innuendo "flick the bean" so whenever he created a Bean class, me made sure to name one of the methods "flick" so he could call bean.flick()

When i get ask to implement encryption methods in my code

after 20 years of programming i finally understand objects, classes and methods. what a waste i am!

me on my cover letter: i'm an experienced programmer
me irl: knows exactly two languages, has to google how to write basic methods

As a Python programmer, I have to honour magic methods.

Our Professor gave us a predefined Datebase with access methods. The whole database is full of
value == 0 ? false : true

How can this guy teach programming languages when he can't apply a simple != operand

Bertram Gilfoyle because of his beautiful, elegant, tight Java methods...

I have a really huge admiration for people who works for the free software, those who made very good tools for almost everything. The Debian community, the FSF.

I'm also admirative in front of those who used computering as a science and made big discoveries in AI, compressing methods, pentesting...

I'm wondering how it is to work in these two worlds?

I like coding in a way that anyonr who comes into my code base can understand whats going on. That way more people can maintain the code base.

However, I HATE having people in my code base. Since they leave shit undocumented, and have 10 variables called "data" "items" "o" "p" and another 20 methods called "processData" "convertItem".

When you make tests for all the methods you know are working and you pass the required coverage.

The worst was an open source project I tried to look at.

It was written in Turbo Pascal.

I am not sure, never really got so far, but it looked like it was one single class with hundreds of methods and hundreds of instance fields for data.

Almost no data objects, if it needed for example 4 sets of 6 variables it had 24 instance fields and in some instances 4 different sets of methods for accessing said variables.

Around there I stopped looking ;)

When you have to write methods that can only be used in a specific way only just to make sure your coworkers aren't fucking shit up.

I have an interface implemented by 11 classes, coz u kno, it's "SOLID". But today i felt my life is a lie when a developer refactored my code and deleted all those classes and placed them in a Utils class with static methods, and slapped me with "Let's make it simple".

Fuck jQuery. The only reason I see anyone using it legitemately is because of backwards compatibility. Almost every jq method is either native js or native css. The problem is, some devs become practically dependent on a library. By then, they are no longer js devs. They are jQuery devs. When you find yourself going to the docs of a lib before native methods 9 times out of 10 you've gone past the turning point. When you find yourself including jQuery instinctively, you're gone. StackOverflow is a great example of this:

Question - 1 up
Pure JS answer - 0 ups
jQuery answer (same length) - 2 ups and accepted

Come on man. It's 2018! We shouldn't be writing jQuery anymore. Native methods ftw!

Uhm... am I the only one who thinks this is a vague as fuck answer and should've taken more than one sentence to properly inform users of their data protection methods? It can't be just me...

Sometimes, when bugs get a bit out of hand... You have to counter them with better debugging methods 🐥

Static, everything is static, static methods everywhere ☹️

Forgive me for I have sinned.

I feel like I need a bleach shower after having had to write these methods in my Dart codebase

Programmers are the digital equivalent to Wizards.

Funny thought:
Just like a wizard manipulates the physical world, creating spells that obey his intentions, a programmer manipulates the digital world, creating processes and methods that obey his will.

There are quite interesting similarities.... Now where's my digital wizard cape!?

We bitch about JavaScript a lot, but I have never encountered a language with better out of bounds index handling for its array methods. It does make some projects considerably easier!

Making games for my TI-Nspire CX CAS is so much fun!
It's so simple but you can do a lot with it. It's also a bit of a challenge because you don't have a huge API with lots of methods and events. You have to use what you have.
Oh btw you can program it with Lua!

Teacher: "Classes and methods are pretty similar in java and c#. But in c they are a little different"
Me: "u cereal?"

Never say something you don't know shit about

function getUnstuck(){
var methods = [
"getting on devRant for a bit",
"adding new functionality to your program",
"refactoring a function or two",
"working on a personal project for a bit",
"zoning out on some music to clear your thoughts",
"getting up from your desk and going to talk to someone",
"getting more coffee",
"taking a \"lunch\" break at the bar",
"just fucking leaving for the day"
];
return "try " + methods[parseInt(Math.random() * methods.length)];
}

Developers who think complex code is good.

"Oh, lookie here, I can swizzle methods and inject dependencies in the runtime!"

"Although we have no valid use case, let's use dependency injection and follow the commandory stateor patterns because I watched a video."

Just because you learn something new that looks cool does not make it practical, you tosser.

No, my friend, you shouldn't put all the methods into a View Controller. Also 4000 lines in a method seems also a bit too much. No wonder you hate unit tests.

CoWorker: “Yea then just use double inheritance to grab the methods off the two classes.”

Me: “Yea that doesn’t seem right... the first object is a string parser the second object predicts future occurrences...”

CoWorker: [louder] “No trust me, I’m taking a developer course right now. If you inherit both classes your new class can use all the needed methods!”

Me: “Okay, go for it bro.”

So tired of people who think they know what they’re doing...

When your project partner is an absolute coding genius.

But writes spaghetti code with methods named function1, function2, ... function20.

How the fk am I supposed to read that code?!?!?!

But I’ll give him credit, the program is works and is amazing. It’s just not possible for anybody other than him to understand.

All classes (with a few exceptions) have nothing but static methods just so that I can call them like "Class::Method()" from anywhere in the project...

Me, consulting for a huge entertainment company:
Why do you guys have a 500 line method? And why is half of it so nested that it's indented half way across the screen?

Them: Oh, that was written by the best dev on our team. He holds a PhD.

🙃 so thats what kind of skill a PhD gets you these days?

For the first time, wholeheartedly prepared for an interview for a major IT firm, only to be rejected coz i didnt know what methods are present in a library i had never used!! Wanted to throw the guy out of the window!! 😑

I think this is the first time ever on my team where I read someone else's source code and actually went "wow... This is pretty well written and structured". No god methods or classes.

So I got some new methods to call, when I tried to call them the usual way, it didn't work quite well.
Surprised, I asked the coder of them.

"Yeah, we're using the new way, you don't mind ?"

nah, no problem, I'm starting to develop my skill in divination and mind reading, that was just my usual training.

Lint rules that keep shouting at you unless you arrange the methods of a class in alphabetical order. What fucking value does it bring? Who fucking cares ? Why do we have them? Whhhyyyyyy ?

When you commit code to the repo and a a junior on the team takes it upon himself to rename all the classes and methods coz he doesn't like them even though his changes make no sense and then sends them to you for a code review .....

Wonder what the results going to be ;-p

An example of bad documentation? Unity. It has a list of poorly described methods of deprecated classes. The only reasonable documentation is the community. Docommunitation.

Today has been a battle of async methods and foreach loops

Taking over development of a system from some other guy who just straight up dropped it with zero documentation. The code looks like he wrote it after watching some getting started tutorial. There is no structure. Some methods and statements are just empty. And he spelt 'connection' three different ways in the same file.

God help me...

Today I deleted a lot of stuff
Fields, methods, classes, files, even database tables

And for a change, it was all on purpose 😁

Feels good to refactor stuff and clear out the cruft!

I'm literally laughing my ass off at how Google gave their fat middle finger to Object Oriented programming with Go's Structs, Methods, and Interfaces. F*** you Java and C++! :-P

The key to debugging methods, is to think methodically.

My C# class loves to come up with weird/unrealistic scenarios to teach a specific language feature... I feel like the more effective way to teach would be to mention a real life scenario where it makes more sense to use the feature and give it some context rather than coming up with some arbitrary series of classes to represent departments and employees and then say "write extension methods for them to write them out"

If you tell me that I'm going to go, ok this works, but is there a specific reason I should do this instead of using a for or foreach to do the exact same thing? Don't get me wrong I see the appeal of extension methods as well as LINQ but this class never gives any sort of context as to why we're doing stuff. This class could be good, I've had classes that focus on language specific features taught in ways that make sense... My Java prof did a great job...

Also all the slides are terribly written...

Like I attached an example of the description for extension methods... The slides then go on to explain how the syntax for them works and gives an example...

Like ok I guess technically you told me what they are and how to use them, but gave zero context...

On the opposite end of the spectrum, I go to MSDN for their definition of extension methods, and it is much more clearly written and gives context to where/why they're used... and this is supposed to be a 5th semester course...

!rant
when you find 3 spelling errors in the same line of code and realize that these are legit 'cause the objects and methods are actually coded misspelled.

That's when no one dare doing code review but simply it builds and its fine.

Luckily #NotMyCode

Found this useless gold from pre define methods of android studio. 💩💩💩💩

I hope one day i will stop writing dirty code to achieve a task, forget to refactor it and then struggle to use correct names for variables and methods when i need to move on other tasks.

Just opened a project that I'll be working on for work, first thing I notice is C++ like code formatting, which hurts my eyes (keep in mind this is Java)

But then decompiled Hybris classes came at me with not only that, but three newlines between methods.

I fear what I have yet to see...

Ticket waiting for code review for days. I have to rename methods.

Tickets goes again to code review. Waiting there again for days. Oops! there is something the code reviewer didn't see before!

Ticket goes to code review again, waiting for days there.

Boss comes to me telling it takes me too long to close tickets.

My biggest regret is not spending more time on Math. While I don't think it has hurt me directly, it has certainly decreased the chance of me learning some DL methods.

That and not pursuing a PhD.

if only there was a native structure that supports find and map methods in js...

Who the fuck invented the glorified pile of shit people call laravel? Is this actually used in PROD for anything else than load testing a monitoring server by creating loads of error messages?
OOP exists for a reason, not to create bazillions of classes with static methods.
Dump that shit ffs!

Java 17 and I see methods in the API that apparently were deprecated back then in Java 1.1! Shouldn't deprecation be the precursor to being eventually removed? Or is backwards compatibility so much important that is ok to have shit in this limbo state for decades?

Not exactly a dream abour coding but my favorite instructor in college.

I dreamt the secret police came to arrest him on campus since his methods teaching cod were unorthodoxed.

As they were leading him away I was screaming and crying - “He’s the best teacher here, what are you doing!”

weird

I was failing all the test cases for a CS assignment where we had to implement our own methods for strings in C++. After an hour of debugging, turns out strings don’t end with ‘/0’ in C++ like in C.
Fuck my life.

Hello,

I have gone through all the options that your public API has for syncing data, and i can now officially say that stripping an iFrame of a Google Drive page would be better than the piece of shit mutation methods you have come up with.

Most sincerely,
A fucking annoyed dev that just wasted about 4 hrs on your shit.

Him: "dont put your constants in a standalone class, it defeats the purpose of OOP. A class is for methods and such."
Me (in thoughts): THIS IS PYTHON YOU OEDIPUS, WHAT ELSE SHOULD I DO IF I DONT WANT MY CONSTANTS TO CLUTTER THE FILE??1?

But using the enum-class as superclass maakes it ok for him...

Python abstract classes... Looks like a pain in the ass...

I'm just gonna create a class filled with methods that just pass or throws NotImplementedException

Good enough?

At what moment do you realize you need to stop coding? Mine is when the code starts bleeding together. Like when I start putting config file information into my methods, which I ended up doing tonight. 😖 God it's time for pizza. 🍕

When you notice that the guy next to you is using Urban Dictionary to name public methods in modules.

How does random number generation work? I'm curious. What are different methods in which you can generate random numbers?

If you could link me to an article or some docs, that'd be appreciated. How far does your understanding of it go?

Thanks for your time.

I just found an old util class of mine for messing with some data before sending it to the api.
The methods are called:
burnId
mutilateDate
cleanseDates
cleanseData
unfuckLocalDateString
fuckDate

I love it.

It's sad because Django is a really great framework, but I can't understand how their serializers work.
I finally tricked to make my own using JsonResponse and alternatives methods, but I can't see why there is "serializers", "DjangoJSONEncoder", "JsonResponse", "json.dumps" and so on...

The documentation doesn't explain much about it :/

Studying human languages.

They are so much more complex than a programming language and full of irregularities and stuff you can't really learn but have to 'feel'. This helped me a lot developing methods to learn new things quite easily and knowing foreign languages are kinda useful when I have to communicate with people too.

I don't think there is anything more painful than seeing some programmers writing badly formatted code.
I mean how can anyone use a single space or completely inconsistent spaces and tabs.
What is more painful is that you cannot scream at them because you don't wanna be an A-Hole trying to force your methods to others.

I wanted to cry so much when I saw my original 2-method interface turns to have 34 methods of unrelated shits.

Who else gets tempted into writing methods they believe they will use in the future. This over engineering is getting in my way 🙀

God damn it, if you (libGDX) have default values for public methods then make those constants public. Now I am writing wrapper and I either create my constant with same value as your private one, or do some reflection black magic which will probably break after obfuscation. *sigh* Going with my copy of the constant, not happy about that...

I really like Julias typesystem, but method dispatch makes it easy to accidentally match against methods you didn't intend.

When I cannot sleep or when I'm half asleep I always think "in programming code". Like if my daily problems or issues where actual classes and methods I need to fix or implement.

This is super weird and I cannot do anything against it. I'm wondering if I am the only one who does this.

!rant
Loving the the fact that constructors in Swift (initializers) can fail (returning null/nil) and be async.

In C# there is no other way than using static methods instead.

What is everyone's thoughts on dynamically creating html using templating or other methods with javascript or jquery?

C# devs go crazy once they found out that kotlin has got extension methods
and some other c#-like features

Just use Scala.
There's a reason books with titles like 'Scala for Java/C# refugees' exist

I had been struggling with writing some test cases for days - so I decided to delete all the test methods I'd written and start from scratch - took me less than 30 minutes!

I'm happy now

Why developer of c# (Anders Hejlsberg) when developing (TypeScript) not implemented method overloading and interfaces' methods implementation with same names.

WHY THE FUCK DO YOU FUCKING RETARDS USE TWO DIFFERENT AUTHENTICATION METHODS FOR THE PAYMENT AND THE CHECKOUT API AND DON'T EVEN DOCUMENT THIS SHIT PROPERLY!! 🖕

Does anyone else think some of the Sonar rules are actually crap?

In particular the Put all you variables above methods one?

I have some static methods and variables and some object ones.

Apart from creating a new class for them which I think is over kill for just a few helper methods, don't you feel you should keep all static stuff separate?

Clean code shouldn't be about following arbitrary debatable rules, it should be preventing the horrible crap that any experienced developer would instantly call shit... If he didn't write it.

And I'm pretty sure I'm experienced so if I'm not calling a price of code shit...I don't see why Sonar should...

Trying to unit test legacy code with lots of static methods suuccks!

C# has static binding by default. Meaning methods aren't overrideable unless you specifically tag them as virtual. I love how in java you can take someone else's random class and override everything with some additional or alternate behaviour.

I just wanna find docs

I search for my problem

why the hell are there 300 links to random people with outdated methods trying to tell you how to do something

I just want the man pages, ffs

I blame @SidTheITGuy saying we are all sitting on gold mines of information and should really become YouTube celebrities dispensing such knowledge

Did I screw up or is it ok doing this?

1. Calling another method inside the same factory file
2. Calling a method from another factory file
3. All factory methods are static because they only depend on their passed parameter(s)

Any tips on how to organize the ever growing shit list that is my tasks list? Maybe some of you are using some awesome methods that I don't know about?

Probably those methods & functions that swap between haystack and needle as they see fit..

Wrote a REALLY bad, simple java method to generate the repetitive parts of c# classes

Now I’m curious about good code generation methods. How I probably should’ve done this

Think I could get some advice and links on how to start learning to write simple code generators?

I stop and write some useless but fun classes/methods which takes my mind off the problem enough that I'm excited to get back to whatever I was working on. It's almost therapeutic reinventing a small part of the wheel in an empty project.

I really want to decouple classes from each other, but I also want to decouple them from any specific DI container, so this is what I came up with. Factory methods passed as arguments.
Is this bad? how would it be better done?

If you have 5 classes using the same postfix... and inside, 4 methods en each, called EXACTLY THE SAME... Please, create at least an abstract class!! or else next week you'll have to make the EXACT same change 5 times!!! or more!!... I don't know man! just saying... Patterns exist for a reason!

First Rant on here!

One of the most frustrating things I have come across in PowerShell is non properly implemented ErrorAction methods in Microsoft maintained modules.

When you are attempting to write a quick script with simple yet proper error handling and Microsoft fumbles the ball at the 1 yard line!

My ideal Saturday night is a few (or a lot of) beers and a room full of comp sci majors arguing about hypothetical sorting methods and their theoretical complexities.

One method and 9 hours later....programming 😬

At internship with a fellow student from my class, making a SqliteHelper class in php to make things easier. Delete methods only have only one parameter (Primary key)

Coworker: "Why do you use the primary key as parameter? The user has no access to it!"

I can't express in words how close I was to snapping.

Do you guys also feel difficulty when you try to write algorithms in the new language? I feel like I am stupid cause I don’t event know the methods for coding the algorithms which can be easy with the language I already know

I wanted to deploy the code of the project I'm working on on the test server to try something.

The code wasn't deployed because the automatic quality inspector detected some methods used are deprecated. So I check the documentation of the methods used. The method is a pass-by to avoid some errors launched by the automatic quality inspector.

So the quality inspector stopped my deployment because I used something that should stop the quality inspector provoking errors.

god dammit

I cloned the most recent copy of my coworker's app so I can help fix bugs when we go live tomorrow. These are the methods in the users controller:

beforeFilter
isAuthorized
login
logout
dashboard
viewAllOrders
viewCheckedOutOrders
viewOrderDetail
addNote
checkOutOrder
rejectOrder
getUsersByOrderStatus
completeOrder
viewOrderHistory
search
admin_addUser
admin_editUser
admin_addClient
admin_editClient
admin_editOrder
admin_createNewOcof
admin_editOcof
admin_viewAllAvailableOrders
admin_viewAllClients
admin_viewAllCurrentOrders
admin_viewAllUsers
admin_viewCheckedOutOrders
admin_viewOrderHistory
delete
userUpload
admin_adminUpload

Working on a piece of code, first created in 1994 and has had constant changes and modifications till 2014

I need to take it and turn it into a procedure library and new methods and classes and I have 3 weeks to do it.

Worst off I'm a junior programmer and I only have 9 months experience with the language

My worst habit(?) is probably loving to "waste" time, making api uri builders.
so I can chain a couple of methods instead of just typing out an uri :p

Can you suggest any good methods to handle stress/anxity/burned out ???

Just been on a like 4 hour no pause coding session (which is fairly long on my terms) trying out random stuff in Java.

-Interfaces
-Classes but weird
-Weird Interfaces with weird methods
-Weird methods
-Custom types, essentially classes
-Depression
-Its 00:13 help

wow I haven't been on here in a while. what are some of your revitalization methods to get excited about projects you are working on?

IMHO Rich Harris (of the Rollup and Svelte fame) is a rock star. I think I'd rant less of more people would follow his methods.

Worst: Writing a quick thing in Python, debugging endlessly because some class I created wasn't being instantiated properly and then realising that I haven't added the holy "()" while creating the object and before using methods in my unit tests.

Best: Creating some pretty sweet algorithms because I was thinking more out of the box and trying things out just for the lulz.

The Rise and Fall of Helper Classes

New method doesn't seem to fit into one of the existing classes so a developer creates a new class and innocently called it "helper".

Another dev had a similar conundrum and adds a couple more methods to the "helper" class.

And a few more methods added...

A couple more methods surely wouldn't be too bad. It has unit tests anyway.

After a year, the helper class has now grown to about 10,000 lines that no one is brave enough to refactor.

CTO now says, "Ok let's park this project and build a new one in Go." Fun times!

What IDE do you guys use?

I use notepad++, Codeanywhere and Visual Studio 2017 Pro.

I'm looking for decent code completion with internal referencing to keep track of methods and variable.

Would you recommend staying with VS or how about intelliJ?

Or something new?

It's a good intention if you want to separate your code in logical units and split it into multiple methods, but could you please stop handing the control flow through about 20 methods before even really starting with the actual logic? This mess is 10 times as long as it needs to be, because someone decided to make everything go through 10 "validate one little thing" methods for every method with actual logic!
Edit: DevRant didn't allow me to post first, now I've analysed the code a bit more and the control flow actually goes out of a specialised class into a generalised class and back (not by returning, but by calling the specialised class from the general one) and the parameter that says what specialised class to call gets written into a class variable, then read from there and passed as a method argument, then back into another class variable, then the code changes it up a bit as a local variable, then passses it as a method parameter again... First it seemed like it knew what class to call using black magic, but no, it actually just hid the fact really well that it did in fact pass the class reference through in multiple forms from beginning to end.

Im making my first opensource project, it's a web component library, but I find the naming part so difficult..

How do you Guys find good project names? And anything i should consider regarding copyrights/e.t.c ?

Suggestions/you naming methods are welcome 🤌

Web service consumer: hey I need you to add new methods to this service

WSC: hey I need you to change the functionality

WSC: hey here are four new lists of fields to return from your service.

WSC: hey what are you doing the schemas are completely different now!! This has caused a lot of work for us

The evolution of code, in Python:
-Many scripts
-Refactor common functions into a Utility class
-Make the scripts into classes/methods with a "static main"
-Create a super script to run them all

I'd provide a screen shot of the last but to much propriety info... But yes it looks short and simple 😄😊

A friend frequently asks me for help with Java homework.
Today we spent half an hour figuring out how to use some ass-backwards linked list implementation his lecturer provided.
The list itself acted like an iterator, keeping track of a 'current' element that had to be reset to the list's head manually every time you want to iterate over the list. There were insert and append methods that call each other for no good reason and most methods would throw the same generic checked exception.
Also they're told to use BlueJ which has the ugliest debugging tools i've ever seen.

When you decide to learn JavaScript and you make a object and realize it is a method, nothing like Java objects😑

This is Node.js FYI

Exporting a single class from a file called util.js. This class only has static methods. Each method is a util function. No fucking way of importing a single method. Class abuse?

Spent an hour today deciding if something in my framework should be called functions or methods... Decided on methods and had to rewrite half of my documentation.... Productive day...

Working on a new release. This release was tested locally and pronounced good. The release went to the QA environment. QA responds that a new feature is doing nothing. There are no errors reported, and work is being done on the UI, but is not get getting persisted to the database so all changes are lost when the session is lost. Do some investigating. I find that a web service had the code in two of its methods commented out. Why? No idea. No response yet from the developer who just had the two methods return a boolean denoting success while all other operations were commented out.

I need an appropriate punishment for this...

Why does java have so many nonsensical limitations? Why? Why can't we have multiple heritage? Why can't we have friend classes? Why can't we make static abstract methods? Oracle, PLEASE.

I was just ordered by PM to remove my class wrapper and explode the massive contents into a function....
Why do I feel like I just had a dirty discussion with my parents... Perverted methods.....

So, what are your most favorite methods of saving interesting articles about algorithms, functions or simply news so you can read them later when you have time? I find myself storing links to interesting web pages without really going back to them or remembering which link was what. I shifted to storing the links in evernote but it's still not what I'd ideally like to have...

If there are any recommended routines, apps or tools that make stored links insightful (like allowing me to add a quick description or automatically adding a sort of preview of the link), I would appreciate it!

Please note that this is primarily about saving a resource while I'm on the go or simply can't/don't want to spend too much time on the actions.

Sometimes I'll get so deep into the logic of methods that I forget what I am even looking for...

So i'm workin on a wrapper for an api, and it has authenticated endpoints. My request function has a check to see if the user has a token before making the authed request, but guess who forgot to actually mark like 20-40 different methods as authed : D

Since I started living by Sandi Metz rules for devs, i feel like my code has really improved.

My favorites:

* Classes can be no longer than one hundred lines of code.
* Methods can be no longer than five lines of code.

I hope you find them as usefull as I did.

Colleague says some of my code sucks, says he's gonna rewrite and improve it.

After he finish his work, I look in his new written code:
F*ckload of unused methods and classes,
some usings of deprecated API calls...

god. It's okay, if you want to help and improve code (my code wasn't the best, I admit)... but when you do, do it the fuck right.

Why is React.js so hard to learn for someone from a JAVA back end background? I'm constantly asking myself "so should I set param as string? or int? Array? so many methods that's returning html tags! what collects all and makes it appear at WHERE??"

Go away laravel, nobody likes your magic methods.

Having worked on thousand line methods for so long, they almost seem normal to me now

So, our lab professor in university for data structures was evaluating my friend's group assignment next to me and my colleague.

Professor: So, what does this method do?

Friend: I feel it would be best to explain our structure first and then how our methods work.

P: No, no. It's okay, I'm seeing it here in my laptop. *Looking at their report which included nothing about the structure of the assignment since she asked specifically only to place the methods and their complexity analysis due to not having time to look and evaluate a full report for each group*

F: Okay, *proceeds to explain*.

P: Okay, and why is your code commented?

F: Because it's good practice and we learned in subject x last semester.

P: Impossible! I teach that subject and I did not teach that in my classes.

F: Okay, but our professor did.

P: *Says nothing*.

They got a 3.25/5 as a grade for it and got really pissed off. I mean, they spent a lot of time making the assignment's structure perfect, optimizing their code and the professor did not care for the structure, just the methods, on the data structures subject.
FYI, they are workaholic, dedicate a lot of time improving their skills and their normal grades are usually >= 4.25.

When I first, at school, set up a program to check how many devices there were on the network using nmap. Then I graphed it over a day and it made me feel real awesome checking out a network and getting info on it, however primitive my methods were

What’s your favorite method to deal with using and securely storing usernames and passwords?
Example: parsing information from a part of a website requiring a login

Everyone I talk to at school has their own different method and now I’m curiously looking for as many methods as people are willing to share

It's really painful to go through a codebase when the other guy doesn't comment anything. It's a new project, you have the opportunity to make it not a nightmare to work with, and yet you choose to not document shit. I've been documenting stuff as I go along at least. Feels like I should have some linter forcing comments on methods at least.

So I use Visual Studio at work, with IntelliSense et Resharper. And they work together quite neatly.

Except for one class.

The biggest one, with the most methods, and the most datas.

why

Well its almost the end of the weekend. Anyone write any methods over the weekend?

The classic! Just spent the last 30 min wondering why the method wasn't doing what I expected, until I realized I was running the wrong one out of two almost identically named methods.. Im going home!

When you try to teach a fourth grader how to make animations for her YouTube channel and everyone wants you to cough up money for simpler methods.

I'm just about done with this asp project and I feel like I've spent at least twice as long on JQuery as I have C#.

Who the fuck thought methods as string options was a good idea?

Anyone ever seen the behavior with async methods and promises where at the end of what should finish the await in the calling code the function never progresses past the await even though it returned ?

That moment when can't root my Asus Android devices😬😬😬

(If there are some working on all devices methods of rooting - please write below)

As a JS developer I wish that when I import a package, a list of all the Jquery methods comes shipped with it 🥺

Doing a code review (Of code written by another person...different code styles and weird methods can really get you a gray hair or two :D)

Coming from a Java background learning C#.

The only question is, why? Why do I have to be so verbose when defining 'virtual' methods?

Oh boy, I just made a class with 5 methods and 10111 lines.

I'm "proud" of myself

(It's kind of an autogenerated class for, but nah...)

it's a bit annoying when you, as a consumer, have to rev-engineer the temporal coupling among dozens of rest methods.

It's not fun. NOT fun at all

Programming anxiety is when one of the similar methods could be 1% better in performance and you're stunned by such a tough choice, which one to use/test first.

Javascript fatigue. Because the node scene is so new it doesn't have the established isms and methods of best practices so every few months the next best framework or library comes out promising to fix the problems we all face

Not sure if it's a rant but...

Less than a year as a professional software engineer and I'm at a small shop, like less than 10 of us.

I'm getting an overwhelming urge to break down these large methods we use into smaller more reasoned out methods we can just call.

Is this me being a n00b and trying to do things "right" or am I just trying to follow some best practices that have been overlooked?