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!rant
Customer: What's the difference between an antivirus and an antimalware?
Me: *thinks for a second* So an antimalware program is like if you're on a beach with a metal detector. You're looking around for metal that's already buried in the sand. An antivirus is like actively watching people for if they drop metal on the ground.
Customer: That's an interesting analogy.
Coworker: *quietly* That's a actually a really good analogy...6 -
Me: That's not how browsers work.
Designer: Well, our users need it.
Me: Uh, I'm not arguing with your idea, but no browser supporters that kind of thing
Designer: Well, figure it out because it's not optional.
Me: ... I'm not disagreeing with you, I'm saying that's not something we can do.
Designer: So, what will it take? What do we need to do to get this in?
Me (not actually): motherfucker this isn't a negotiation! I'm not arguing I'm fucking explaining the limitations of web apps!25 -
Frontend Dev: That's not possible in Frontend, we should do it in Backend.
Backend Dev: That's not possible in Backend, we should do it in Frontend.
-- CIVIL WAR --27 -
Person: HTML is a programming language
Me: No it's not
Person: Yes it is it can compute things
Me: No it can't, and what do you mean?
Person: Have you ever heard of a script tag
Me: That's not fucking HTML that's JavaScript.15 -
I've tried to joke about it, but you won't pick up the hint. I've told you about the smell, but you think it is a joke. It's not. It. Is. Not. A. Joke.
STOP MICROWAVING FISH IN THE OFFICE YOU FUCKING SOCIOPATH!11 -
Client: Why is this not working?
Me: Because the feature expect a...
Client: I sure hope you won’t expect your client to want to know all these teach behind this feature, as a client, I just expect it to work.
Me: Ok...
Client: So why isn’t it working now? WHY?
Me: 🤦🏽♂️
Client: I need a response!
Me: It is not working because...
Client: Stop telling me logics!! I just want it to work. Why isn’t it working...
Me: It is not working because I fucked up. It will work after I fix it.
Client: Why isn’t it working though... I don’t understand why...
Me: Just let me fix it and it will work...
Client: Why can’t you tell me why... it’s not good communication... (hangs up)12 -
Rekked/insulted a client so hard today in a way which was obvious for me/colleagues but not for the client that the colleague sitting next to me completely fucking lost it. (client did not detect/notice it)
That's entirely fine as he was not too loud but his laughter is so fucking contagious that he went outside to make sure that I wouldn't catch it any worse while on the phone.
God damn it took some serious self control to not completely lose my shit xD (it only partly worked 😅)18 -
Don't BS your managers or peers about your understanding of a topic.
It is okay to not know something. It is not okay to pretend that you do.3 -
Interviewer: How will you solve the travelling salesman problem?
Me: *explains the solution on whiteboard*
Interviewer: It is slow. Can you do it in linear time at least?
Me: It is NP hard so it is not possible. For a restricted case, it may be possible
Interviewer: You are stupid. Do not apply again.9 -
Hide yo' wives and yo' onanism, the haxors are cumin... i mean, coming for you!
Found on Reddit :D
10 -
Today, I was told to investigate why the software doesn't work on "some" computers. I had no previous experience with that particular software but I just had to make some tests... easy, right? As soon as I ran the software, my computer crashed (I literally had to restart the pc). I asked my colleagues if I did something wrong but the set up seemed ok.
Later, in a random discussion about the software I found out it does "a little memory allocation". I opened the performance tab in task manager and ran the software again. In an instant, the RAM went from 1.3GB to 7.66GB (my pc has 8GB of RAM).
In an attempt to find how such a monstrosity was creater, I found out the developer that made the software had 16GB of RAM on his pc.
I have found something that eats RAM more than Chrome... brace yourselves.8 -
Every step of this project has added another six hurdles. I thought it would be easy, and estimated it at two days to give myself a day off. But instead it's ridiculous. I'm also feeling burned out, depressed (work stress, etc.), and exhausted since I'm taking care of a 3 week old. It has not been fun. :<
I've been trying to get the Google Sheets API working (in Ruby). It's for a shared sales/tracking spreadsheet between two companies.
The documentation for it is almost entirely for Python and Java. The Ruby "quickstart" sample code works, but it's only for 3-legged auth (meaning user auth), but I need it for 2-legged auth (server auth with non-expiring credentials). Took awhile to figure out that variant even existed.
After a bit of digging, I discovered I needed to create a service account. This isn't the most straightforward thing, and setting it up honestly reminds me of setting up AWS, just with less risk of suddenly and surprisingly becoming a broke hobo by selecting confusing option #27 instead of #88.
I set up a new google project, tied it to my company's account (I think?), and then set up a service account for it, with probably the right permissions.
After downloading its creds, figuring out how to actually use them took another few hours. Did I mention there's no Ruby documentation for this? There's plenty of Python and Java example code, but since they use very different implementations, it's almost pointless to read them. At best they give me a vague idea of what my next step might be.
I ended up reading through the code of google's auth gem instead because I couldn't find anything useful online. Maybe it's actually there and the past several days have been one of those weeks where nothing ever works? idk :/
But anyway. I read through their code, and while it's actually not awful, it has some odd organization and a few very peculiar param names. Figuring out what data to pass, and how said data gets used requires some file-hopping. e.g. `json_data_io` wants a file handle, not the data itself. This is going to cause me headaches later since the data will be in the database, not the filesystem. I guess I can write a monkeypatch? or fork their gem? :/
But I digress. I finally manged to set everything up, fix the bugs with my code, and I'm ready to see what `service.create_spreadsheet()` returns. (now that it has positively valid and correctly-implemented authentication! Finally! Woo!)
I open the console... set up the auth... and give it a try.
... six seconds pass ...
... another two seconds pass ...
... annnd I get a lovely "unauthorized" response.
asjdlkagjdsk.
> Pic related.
22 -
Me: will you be my date this valentine's day?
Her: What? No ways!!
Me: sudo will you be my date this valentine's day?
Her: Hell ya !! 😘
.
.
.
Me: *wakes from sleep* Damnit, wish I could sudo everything!!😓5 -
So, my wife is in the hospital with two of the kids for an annual checkup. Should be nothing to worry about but still it's stressful and I want to be there.
I'd booked the day off (until the end of the week) and last week I got told, you've taken too many holidays, just the Friday is approved.
Ok, fine, I'll do some extra hours work from home and be there for the appointment. But fuck no, they schedule an "important" client meeting this morning and I'm required to attend.
TWO FUCKING HOURS and I contributed a sum total of 2 sentences which could have been filled in just as well by the other developer on the call
Just another reason I'm happy to be interviewing at other companies.6 -
Coworker: According to science, people who work with math or computers are least likely to get divorced.
Me: Well that's because they're least likely to get married.
Coworker: ...In order to participate in the study you had to be married at least once
Me: It was a joke, man!
Coworker: Well it wasn't a funny one!
Me: ...it was to me...7 -
Not a rant, but had to come here to post this.
I couldn't resist pranking my wife with the age old "Oh my God, I broke your laptop" prank.
SHE DID NOT FIND IT AS FUNNY AS I DID.
Anyone else tried it? If not, definitely try it.
20 -
When a friend asks to create a website for his startup for free. FML 😔 I got bills to pay. Will he provide his service for free??14
-
Such immense satisfaction when. You have been telling the other team that the problem is on their end and providing more and more evidence that it is but they insist it's in your end and now finally they are admitting the problem is on their end!
3 -
[14 dependencies]
"Geez this project has a lot of dependencies. I know, I should use a package manager!"
[15 dependencies]4 -
StackOverfllow -> Copy Code -> Doesn't work -> Study its working -> Read related info on other websites -> Code starts to make sense -> Do the required changes in code as per the understanding -> Got it working.
I only learn if the initial 2 steps fail. Else I skip the latter. -
Intranet not working.
Delete certificates.
Still not working.
Ask IT.
You need to create ticket to delete certificates.
IT site is in intranet.
Intranet not working.
Ask IT to create ticket.
They can't create tickets for users.
FML
Just another day in corporation.1 -
Shitty call
Me: what do you want?
Q: I Lost my iphone
Me: (already pissed) ok,do you have an icloud account?
Q: Yes, but i forgot the password.
Me: what!?!, ok, fine, we will reset it, which is your ID?
Q: I lost it too.
*stay calm* *stay calm*
Me: I can't help you go to an apple store and ask there. *I Close the call*
*Add that number to blacklist*2 -
Dear friends and family, just because I'm a devloper does not mean I know how to fix all of your IT issues. I am not IT.8
-
Git. Not Linux, not python, not gimp, not GCC, not Emacs. Git.
Because it saves your work and you can work with other people on one project in a human way5 -
Let an expert consultant write your code, they say. It will be all right, they say.
Found this today in a legacy codebase.
3 -
Wonder if they programmed the buttons to be that weird layout, if not (If someone here would get it) we should be able to overwrite it (not by changing the keycaps) 😅😉
6 -
Tl;Dr: Client-side validated online test
Some stupid questions in an online test.
Not all of them were coding questions, but all (yes ALL) were client-side validated and to solve the tasks all I had to do was to copy one array into another and set the time I needed for that task to a legit number.
Well at least it was an online test that doesn't required 3hours.2 -
When you've been working your ass off for months alone on a project with major backend features and the feedback you get from the CEO at the demo is "I don't like the colour".3
-
So I've been applying to jobs. I, purposely, have been putting down that I am female (since they all harp on diversity, I'd like to see if they even bother reaching out to me. Also anything to get my resume past the bots).
Spoiler alert - getting similar ratios to male counterparts, 100+ applications sent, maybe 4 phone interviews. No offers yet. Still made to do code challenges.
Well, I just found out where all that diversity hiring went to. Buddy of mine who works at a mid tier company said that they have a special program that onboards women into tech.
Specifically, women who have literally zero background in computers.
Teachers, social workers, etc. They get a week or so of some coding bootcamp and then get full time positions over more skilled applicants.
This infuriates me. I literally would be in a better situation to be hired had I not have had any technical background, taken this particular bootcamp and finally net the elusive entry level position I need.
And guess what? That move has antagonized the existing male employees who see that they have zero interest and zero competency instead of having an integrated workplace.
10/10 for incredible bullshit.6 -
No, it's not damaged. Yes, it most definitely can be opened. No, I should not move it to the trash, because I want to open it.
Quit your bullshit Apple and stop telling me what I should do.
5 -
It's not a bug if a feature is working how you told me it should work but not how you wanted it to work.6
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Me: "ok for the following changes you must pay the following charge because it's not in the scope"
Customer: "bUt tHiS Is Not whAt I wanT, wOnT pAY thE ResT iF yoU arE nOt DoiN It blablabla"
Marketing: "please do it for him"
Fuck me.1 -
them: "This external HD isn't compatible with my Mac."
me: "It is, it probably just needs to be formatted."
them: *hands me box, with HD still in plastic wrap*
So, how do you know it's not compatible?2 -
Makeshift standing desk to see if the hype is actually worth it or not.
10 minutes in: Not really feeling it. Could be because it's 1:20 and I'm slightly tired, or it could be the fact I'm kinda lazy lol
3 -
I lost a bet today 😥 ... My surname is inman
I have to name my first born child
put-it
The bet? That apple wouldn't reject the app I submitted ... Fuck apple11 -
MS paint is going away...
Wait no it's not...
SHUT UP! No one cares about paint. No one even uses it anyways. And no, because you opened it twice last year to crop a screenshot does not count as using it.15 -
WTF is this bullshit?!! I set an alarm on my phone for 9:00 and 9:15 just in case... The alarms went off at 10:00 and 10:15, now I am an hour late for work. Just how does that even work?!!! Yeah, time changes but you don't change the fucking alarm Huawei! FFS... I really don't look forward to explaining this...
Also.. devRant on mobile seems to be broken? :( @dfox14 -
“The essence of XML is this: the problem it solves is not hard, and it does not solve the problem well.” – Phil Wadler, POPL 2003
credit: http://harmful.cat-v.org/software/...
3 -
I got a "Revise and Resubmit" response from the journal. Reviewer #1 wanted me to implement some baselines to compare against my method and he cited 6 papers. 5 of them did not have open-source code, and it's not like you can re-implement, train models and fine-tune someone else's approach in 2 weeks. The last one had code, for Ubuntu 14 (may its soul rest in peace), OpenCV version from the time America and Europa were connected and CUDA toolkit that was carved in stone in a cave.
I was bawling my eyes out, thinking about how many days it would take trying to Docker it to work. But then I realized the approach he cited was for RGB-D data, while I only use RGB camera. That's like letting a sniper with an M82 compete in archery....6 -
so I had a very important video conference for some rather large cloud infrastructure that Im engineering. I decide to look "smart" so i decided to wear a jersey during the video call. I aced the meeting, happy people all round. I walk to my room and my wife says "you do know your jersey is inside out...and back to front..and the label is sticking out from under your chin....How did the meeting go?" me:"..fine until you pointed out a look like a 2 year old dressed me !" ... well thats one way to kill the happy feels!3
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Sometimes am really pissed off with stack overflow, it won't let you comment if you have less points.
Its like yeah, you can make an answer with every stupid shit possible but no, you can't comment or get any good author's attention, he might be meditating -_-6 -
So my mom says her printer isn't working anymore. I sit and battle with drivers and mysteriously missing virtual usb ports for two hours, give up, we decide to buy a new printer.
Next day she says her scanner isn't working either.
It's only then that I notice her USB hub cable is unplugged.. aargh. -
Working as a software engineer but: co-workers randomly walk into my office to ask me <<insert random IT problem (i.e. mouse not working etc.)>> while I'm deeply focused programming. Trying to close my office door results in co-workers backbiting...
Why can't they just go to the IT administrator who's work it is to handle their fucking problems?3 -
Hmm internet connection is down. Check isp status page...no issues. Wait 50mins on phone to get to support, where they tell me there is a known issue, reported 4 hours ago. After call check isp status page...no issues
Is AWS selling status pages as a service now?5 -
Every project ever :
Initial plan :
||===================|| 100 %
Actual submission
||==|| 13%
- Not enough money!
- Not enough people!
- Not enough time!
- Not enough resources!
- Hardware not supported
- Software not supported
- My team are useless
- God didn't like it. :/1 -
A classmate's earphones once stopped working, I went to go look at it. After a bit of tinkering, I said, "The speakers on these are toast, you'll need a new pair." Then, some random kid grabbed the tablet mind you, and not the earphones, played in the settings, and said "Fixed." I then told them, "This is a hardware issue, not a software issue." What's worse? Some people said "So, software and hardware are the same thing."
Mississippi is just full of computer Illiterates.19 -
I HATE IT WHEN I HAVE TO BE NICE TO THESE KINDA FCKED UP IGNORANT PEOPLE
[11:10, 16/04/2020] +263 73 ...: Hi I want to develop an app do you live in glen view
[11:12, 16/04/2020] Softaz: Um in budiriro
[11:12, 16/04/2020] Softaz: What do yu have in mind
[11:15, 16/04/2020] +263 73 ....: There's an idea I've been testing and its about creating an app thats track patients with the covid virus the people they have infected even before the infected ones test positive
[11:16, 16/04/2020] +263 73 4....: What do you think about this coz this is not a money generating project but we will do it for humanity
[11:17, 16/04/2020] +263 73 4...: We will finish the project in less than 3 days coz I've got the research covered and how the app will operate I jus need someone who can punch the code
[11:22, 16/04/2020] Softaz: Its a good idea
Though your time frame is too tight
What platform will this app run on?
[11:26, 16/04/2020] +263 73 47...: About the time frame its becoz its a very simple mechanism4 -
Dear arbitrary online video tutorial. It is pronounced "et-cetera" and not "ek-cetera"... While we're at it, it's not pronounced "dekstop" either. 😒1
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Learn enough docker to convince my coworker that it is not the solution to EVERY problem, especially not to our problem8
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Part of me loves devRant for it's diverse community of awesome people doing varied and interesting projects. And their ability to support and learn from each other, or at least agree to disagree.
Another part of me wants to host an API with an isTwat call that allows you to find out if someone's a twat or not, with links to their offending comments and rants. Along with a website for easy Twact™ checking.3 -
My Team Lead: Hey do you know goofy?
Me: What is it?
TL: It's a new programming language
Me: *being suspicious* show me what are you dealing with
TL: *Shows me a Groovy code snippet*
Me: Yeah!! Your goofy is pretty good!! Enjoy! 😡1 -
Been developing a Java app for 3 months, including basically everything from aop to rest services.
Meeting with po:
Me: So, guess how many loc I wrote.
Po: 400?
Me: *laughs* I'll get to 10.000 this week.
MAN COMES IN WITH CHANGING REQUIREMENTS ON AN HOURLY BASIS YET STILL DOESNT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH WORK ALL THIS SHIT IS!!1 -
Not exactly new, but just so it does not get forgotten:
FUCK ECLIPSE.
Fuck that stupid piece of shit IDE and everything related to it.8 -
-Writes a function that I'm going to schedule for django.
-works in development.
-adds it to production cron using django-crontab
-not working.
-spends 3 hours editing code, searching for similar problems and reading documentations but find nothing wrong and it's still not working.
-maybe it's django-crontab so I decide to just write a custom management command and call it through cron.
-still not working.
-calls function using what I'm telling cron to do.
-everything works.
-?????????
-adds logs to cron command (sorry for not making it earlier)
-mfw the code is not working because I imported 'patterns' in urls.py which has been deprecated since django 1.8
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Why do some developers write the official documentation with low interpretability and a high number of technical terms? It does not look cool if it does not serve the purpose it was made for - Helping us understand your software!!!
-
2017 has ended and I want to throw this fucking rock of anger with it out of the Window.
I will tell you how my last 3 to 4 years as private IT Guy (IT Dumpster) for everything was.
My Gaming Community:
It was so fucking retarded that I would like to punch everyone there in the face over a thousand times.
Seriously there are over 60 People in that Community and they take every shit for granted and only cry about everything.
I'm Paying since 4 Years over 60 € for our Server every month. Some people donated some small bucks over the time and in the end it was around 150 € Donations over 4 years.
Im thankful for the Donations, but these people really think that they can demand for this Donations private Gameservers for over years for free or think that they now own the Servers. WTF?? FUCK YOU!!
Im managing 2 Linux Server with Web, MySQL, Voice and Gameserver. What did 1 guy donate? 10 € for 4 years, thats around 15% for just a month. You would get our Teamspeak for 7 Days for that price idiots!!
I did all the damn Webdev and am now writing a App in Kotlin for Android man!!
Since last everybody in the Community gets on my nerves, because they are so ignorant and dont appreciate the work of others 😡.
My Association where I support the hole IT with a friend:
We decided in the commitee that we would take on major changes in our infrastructure.
We need to finish the barebone concept in the end of January 18.
Early December 17 I wrote my friend, that we need to have a meeting and plan everything.
Well, now I mostly designed the roadmap by myself and didnt receive any reply from my friend 💀.
I really dont understand why the shit always sticks at me and I need to finish it.
I really love to code something, install or repair PC's with joy or manage Server but the people around me are in my free time like poison and they take out my fun for it.
The only fun and enjoyable IT Part for me is at my fulltime job. Thats the only good place left for me as Safe Heaven and the people there really appreciate my knowledge and work I do.7 -
I did not use my Windows 10 since weeks. Now I wanted to play some games and I got a bluescreen. It reboots several times. I did not miss it.8
-
I'm pretty sure people here might have noticed this by now, but why is it that the button is '++' but the notifications say '+1'? Shouldn't it go "<someperson> has ++'d your rant/comment"?
6 -
-click-
MySQL: 'the table does not exist'
I just fucking made the temp table dude, that's what you literally do in step 1 .... how could it not....
-click-
MySQL 'Records: 1 Duplicates: 0 Warnings: 0'
Me: "Oh there we g---"
-click-
MySQL: 'the table does not exist'
Me: "Hey you just worked!"
-click-
MySQL: 'the table does not exist'
GOD DAMN IT
-click-
-click-
-click-
-click-
-click-
-click-
MySQL 'Records: 1 Duplicates: 0 Warnings: 0'
Me: Uh you're working now?
-click-
MySQL 'Records: 1 Duplicates: 0 Warnings: 0'
-click-
MySQL 'Records: 1 Duplicates: 0 Warnings: 0'
-click-
MySQL 'Records: 1 Duplicates: 0 Warnings: 0'
Guess that API just needed breaking in....3 -
Changing the native browser scrollbar should warrant the death penalty.
Do not make it narrower. Do not make the colors blend with the background. Do not hijack it its functionality. Do not minimize it until I hover.
I am so fucking tired of websites that think they are in charge of my browsing "experience" and hide or otherwise marginalize the single most useful part of the page's UI.4 -
punk: the world is not fair, and I hate it
post-punk: the world is not fair, and I love it
ska: the world is not fair, and I have a trumpet2 -
So it's.... Not a switch.
Poor marketing. Just don't call it a switch and it's not a bad handheld!
7 -
!rant
Coworker: I've been working on this computer for an entire day now and it's still having issues
Boss: Well, we can give the client an option to get another SSD and clone to it before reinstalling the OS.
Coworker: But he doens't have an SSD...
Boss: Yes he does
Coworker: *opens computer* let's see, two 1TB hard drives... but no SSD... Oh, there it is. It's hidden. But it's booting too slow to be....
*epiphany*
Coworker: Oh my god. I've been telling the computer to boot to the wrong hard drive. That explains everything!1 -
Whispers in the dark haunt me:
You are not here to innovate
You are known as a mad scientist and your help will be detrimental to progress
Your wish of change goes against our legacy
You can not do it
It can't be done
You will be blocked
You don't have the experience to accomplish this
It is not easy as it seems
You won't understand
There are political reasons to not to improve
No5 -
Yo i know this shit is discussed way too often, but it kills me from the inside:
In that one coding class we get some source files where only the function bodies are missing (i know, sounds childish).. but it uses this style
function()
{
...
}
I fuCKING HATE THIS GODDAMN RETURN THERE WHAT THE HELL WHO FINDS THIS BULLSHIT AESTHETIC ALL SPACEY SO YOU SCROLL YOUR ASS OFF WHEN FILES GET LONGER THAN 2 FUNCTIONS?😔7 -
How my day went.
Project Manager: We need deliverable X.
Me: That's not listed.
PM: But we need it. Other PM says what you provided isn't enough.
Me: Too bad. I was not told to deliver it.
PM2: We need deliverable X.
Me: Look at the requirements. It is not there. I'm not providing it.
PM2: We need it. Let me ask PM3.
PM3: We need deliverable X.
Me: No. It's not listed. And here's why it's not even applicable.
PM3: Oh....ok5 -
!rant
Just discovered bulma.io! I've got to say I am completely in love with it! It's sooooo much faster than bootstrap and it's completely JavaScript free, you have full control over what parts of bulma you import and use, making it even faster.
I haven't had this much fun re-doing a front-end in years!
So what's your opinion on bulma.io (and/vs bootstrap) ? :)4 -
I just wasted 2 hours together with a colleague to trace a bug, through several modules, functions, data, etc to find out it was usage of the wrong information in the wrong place. The data used was never intended to be used this way.
I HATE SUCH SOFTWARE ARCHAELOGY.
Carefully uncovering layer over layer, getting one detail after another, from which you don't know if it's really necessary to trace the bug, until you lose the sight of the whole picture. Then when you're confused to the maximum, try to figure out what's important and what not and reassemble the puzzle until you can see where the road is heading.
At least we found the cause of the bug, so it wasn't useless. Now we have to waste more time to develop a solution (...preparing for next rant 🙇)3 -
Scenario A:
Your code is working. You run again, now it's not working.
Scenario B:
Works on production. Next day it doesn't.
It is nothing you just experienced alternate universe. You probably with your manager temporarily jumped into another timeline where your code is not working.
Next time it happens tell your manager it's not your fault.
Eureka!6 -
How to NOT handle dates!
Do not put the date to "mdy" format, today would be 050217.
Working on an intranet for some multi-billion corporation, and was wondering why events from last year were showing.
Last year's events were 28th of October, 2016, and was showing as upcoming events :)
Checked the code, and saw this. Quick fix, turned dates to UNIX timestamp, and it worked.
2 -
IT description of remote access tool on IT wiki page:
"Support for latest Mac and Windows release"
Also same page:
"macOS Mojave is not yet supported (...) Please do not upgraded until instructed"
No comments... -
It's like nails on a chalkboard:
Meeting #3 about "Thing doesn't update."
Where nobody has shown it not to update yet.
(⓪益⓪) -
We are so fucked up at our company:
While the support for our client hardware is running out, our operation departement has just found out that Windows 7 is no longer supported on new HW. Well, that for itself is not bad, but we have a really old tool for reporting our daily work. And because that mo*fu*ing piece of customized software still runs in 16bit mode, it will not run on Win 10 anymore.
Alternative solutions are too expensive, so I see that we will have to port that crap somehow from 1997 to 2017 ourself 😲 Replacing is not an option because there are a ton of Excel sheets connected to the database, even the company balance is made with that data (and also in Excel). At least it is our CEO which has built that crap. So he has to pay for his twenty year old sins!4 -
I am officially no longer writing one line of HTML.
Or any line that has to do with anything fucking front-end.9 -
A lot of coke! I meant Coca Cola, not not cocaine. But sometimes I got feeling, it will help more.8
-
If it hasn't a README, its not opensource! Just because you put it on Github doesn't mean people can use it...5
-
It took me putting on my glasses to make sure these pixels were real and not just blind ass not seeing shit.
-
I work as pharmacist, but code as hobby and recently change job. Have far more options to improve work enviroment, but IT guy sucks balls so much.
Better no password, because you have to remember them.
Some users don't have privilages to do some things, but everyone knows boss password with all privilages.
It guys connects via teamviewet whn I check prescriptions with quite vulnerable data and after my step in he responds that he creates this Pharmacy store and has deal with boss to access database and others.
Due lack of controls there is working against law all the time
Small city so everyone knows everyone and you have to be ultra polite to doctors and after my little unpleasent situation doctor starts to be mad at all employers.
It guy was asked to change disc space on OS drive, but he replies that it will takie at least 2 hours and he doesn't have time, but it takes me 15min top and he was mad at me.
Ffffff.... -
How is it security, a function of IT, does not understand developers? I mean, they work in IT, should not at least pick-up on the culture?3
-
No, that Nigerian prince is not real and it is a scam, and no, I am not jealous and I don't envy you, you know what, it is totally legit ... I was lying ...
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Not working, not looking at the phone, not listening to music, just sitting there and doing nothing until you get bored enough to get back to it.
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I need some advice, because I'm feeling like I'm getting ripped off by my company.
I'm a junior developer and this is the first company I've every worked at. I've been here for 1 1/2 year. I said in the first interview that I am proficient with a fullstack framework, for a rather niche programming language, but I don't want to do front end, because I'm not good at it and I generally don't like it.
I'm the sole coder working on a project that costs the client 100EUR/h. There are others, but they just organize the tasks I have to do. This project requires me to work a full stack of retardation server, that's a pain in the ass, not really compatible with this project and required hack after hack to be fixed. Finding bugs in this pile of shit often takes days of emailing around and asking for logs in hope something might pop up. I've had to scavage through threads saying the still bleed form the anus or have PTSD, beccause of this retarded stack. As you can imagine, I'm also responsible for all of the QA and obviously get shit for bugs. I'm supposed to remember every little detail I've done in this project at the end of the sprint, while also working on 2-3 other projects simutaniously.
I've developed some small servers with dashboard and api for apps on my own. I'm supposed to also do all of the QA so that my boss doesn't see any errors, because otherwise our clients have to be QA.
I have written a complicated chat system that is distributed across nodes. We've nearly missed a deadline of 6 days for this shit, because I've been put under preasure, because I estimated such a "large" amount of time for this.
Other things I've done include:
* Login/Registration on many projects
* Possibility to add accounts for subordinated, with a full permission system for every resource
* Live product configuration with server validation and realtime price updates
* Wallet & transaction system, dealing with purchases of said product and various other services offered on this platform
* Literally replaced the old, abandoned database framework from a project with a modern one.
I've made some mistakes during the WFH corona times, but this that doesn't mean you can put more preasure on me and pull stuff like this: https://devrant.com/rants/2498161 https://devrant.com/rants/2479761
Is all of what I'm doing and have to deal with worth the 9EUR/h salary?10 -
Apparently they knew how to program in bible (partial translation of a traditional passover song below):
If He had brought us out from Egypt,
and had not carried out judgments against them
— Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had carried out judgments against them,
and not against their idols
— Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had destroyed their idols,
and had not smitten their first-born
— Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had smitten their first-born,
and had not given us their wealth
— Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had given us their wealth,
and had not split the sea for us
— Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
If He had split the sea for us,
and had not taken us through it on dry land
— Dayenu, it would have sufficed!
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That time when the IT guy for your client company email you asking if we need to change code of their web based system cause they got new printer.
He forwarded the question from users like he didn't know the users needed to select a new printer or change their default printer.
God knows what he's doing there!!3 -
Anyone find sequence diagrams useful? I’m working with a BA who loves creating these things—he has a tool he knows and clearly wants to get his money’s worth.
Just seems like busy work to me. Takes more time to understand them than if he just explained the concept in text.8 -
These 🤡clowns🤡 are so dependent on me and I'm just sick of it, not to mention I simply don't have the time.1
-
can we just get rid of floating points? or at least make it quite clear that they are almost certainly not to be used.
yes, they have some interesting properties that make them good for special tasks like raytracing and very special forms of math. but for most stuff, storing as much smaller increments and dividing at the end (ie. don't store money as 23.45. store as 2,345. the math is the same. implement display logic when showing it.) works for almost all tasks.
floating point math is broken! and most people who really, truely actually need it can explain why, which bits do what, and how to avoid rounding errors or why they are not significant to their task.
or better yet can we design a standard complex number system to handle repeating divisions and then it won't be an issue?
footnote: (I may not be perfectly accurate here. please correct if you know more)
much like 1/3 (0.3333333...) in base 10 repeats forever, that happens with 0.1 in base 2 because of how floats store things.
this, among other reasons, is why 0.1+0.2 returns 0.300000046 -
Got the iphone mini cuz I was ecstatic to have a small phone that I could use on one hand on the IOS ecosystem.
Found out that apple might discontinue the line for the next iteration due to "poor sales".
It really doesn't matter to me what operating system I am using for the phone, I wanted to give the IOS ecosystem a go with the release of this model. But man it kinda hurts that everyone is hell beant on large screens. Even the standard pixel phone feels too big. I do not want a "tiny" phone, even if one of my favorite Android devices was my Sony Ericsson XPERIA. To me the size of the iphone 5s was perfect. I just want companies to go to that again man. And I do know that there are models for Android that are capable of reaching similar sizes, its just that finding a premium level experience on a phone that size from the Android size gets hard to adjust to carriers etc.
I am liking this little fucker though, very speedy, nifty, decent battery time, camera etc.18 -
Funny how fucken emojis, which came into applications (web or even native) by completely overusing them on mobile, don't really work on mobile.1
-
Product Owner.
Not Product Liaison.
Not Product Buddy.
Not Product Suggester.
Own it. Bend it to your will. Make it better or sunset it and build it again. But don’t be a wet noodle and say “I’m just following orders”. You give the orders, you own it.3 -
NOT AGAIN ...
NOT AGAIN ...
NOT FUCKING AGAIN ...
I AM NOT THE FUCKING DJ ...
THATS IT IM MAKING TSHIRTS
_______ _______
/ v \
/ / | | \ \
| ME |
| NO |
| DJ |
|____________|2 -
Repeat after me:
process.env is not standardized. Keep it out of the browser.
process.env is not standardized. Keep it out of the browser.
process.env is not standardized. Keep it out of the browser.
process.env is not standardized. Keep it out of the browser.
Fucking hate the web community. It's just a large trash barge at this point.19 -
Need to attend devops webinar
Webinar link requires flash...
I guess I'll find something else to do then2 -
Why does it feel like nobody uses D?
I love it. It combines the best bits of C++, Java, Ruby and even some Python. It still is C ABI and C++ ABI (ish) compatible. It can do everything you need it to. It's not limited like Java. It feels cleaner than C. I LOVE IT. But I don't understand why there's not much going on about it. Is it because it's not 100% stable yet? I don't know. AAAARGH7 -
Kinda amazing that dyn does not have DDoS protection...
It is NOT hard to get and for a quite big Company like dyn - it is cheap also3 -
God fucking dammit.
I spend the entire day trying to get [this piece of shit] (https://github.com/php-ds/extension) to work and at the end of the day its tests pass, but when I try to instantiate a set, I still get bloody errors.
I mean, am I not punished enough for having no guidance in learning PHP and knowingly having to create an absolute monstrosity just because I don't know how to do it better.
Fuck it, I'm just gonna go cry myself to sleep now and only will start feeling like a failureagain, when I wake up.
sorry for bothering you with my problems.6 -
The one thing more annoying than when something is not working when it should - when something is working when it should not.
-
Python be like:
TypeError: 'callable_iterator' object is not callable
and also:
TypeError 'callable_iterator' object is not subscriptable
Why the fuck did you name it "callable iterator" if you can't call it, or iterate it.4 -
//not an actual rant
Just curious how many non software students/employers/people code while it is not their main profession
5 -
Yay Google + leaked info!!
New old news again :P
Come on people if you want something to be safe you DO NOT I repeat DO NOT send it to someone else's computer. That's it. Fuck firewalls fuck av fuck it all.1 -
My boss from a job I recently quit, there was a slight problem and I wasn't sure how to approach it as I didn't want to bother the customers and she just went out there like "I want to bother them 😈"
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How do you feel about ieee and other paid research websites?
Every time i search something complex, an ieee research paper would pop up and i couldn't read it, coz i don't have the membership. Even if i did, i had to pay Rs. 1000 (~=$12) . For every paper i want to see
I am not saying its bad to demand a price for your work. But i wish ieee was more like github or medium, where people could also optionally publish their content for free viewing. The cost is making a lot of students miss deep knowledge of research papers.
The main thing that currently frustrates me as a student is the fact that University subject syllabus are made by sulky old phd teachers who have been long term members of ieee and other paid research orgs, and thus have designed the syllabus with topics which are covered nowhere but in research papers.
I also know that some of you sre thinking "dude , just google search anything and you will find tons of videos and content on anything", but from what i have observed, free internet takes time to grow for a perticular topic . If i search a relatively complex topic i may find some surface info and basic videos, but to go deep, i have to rely on paid/pirated books and papers.
These organisation has gathered a lot of content and renowned people. Maybe they can give away a few knowledge to the open source.7 -
To be successful. It is not IQ, not social intelligence. It is grit. Interesting. https://youtu.be/H14bBuluwB82
-
That feeling when the Jenkins build fails and fixing it is both out of your scope and permission.
Dear devops, you should know when a certificate expires that we use to authenticate with external web services. -
They say that runing the same command over and over again is a sign of insanity.
LIKE HELL IT IS!!!
I've been running `terraform apply` for the last hour (trying to dump an EKS token in plain-text, because my k8s-related providers failed to auth to the cluster), and miraculously the problem went away. Now the error is no more.
Insanity?
I beg to differ!
Narf!
3 -
I'm looking into GraphQL and so far so good, but I am finding it hard to implement business rules, for example:
1. Receive request with auth token
2. Know who the user is by extractin userId from token
3. fetch data related to that user only.
I was only able to make it allow or deny if there is a token or not lol5 -
Why fucking windows explorer's search is fucking case-sensitive? I could not find any fucking option for it.
Edit : actually it's not but sometimes it couldnot find files2 -
There is a period in developer's life when writing comments in your code is a good idea. Then, after some time, when you write comments, it means your code is not that descriptive, is not so good that you consider writing comments.2
-
I try not to think about the future.
But can not not do it.
Every thing will come together.
Or apart.
Disorder will increase.
Or everything is a lie. -
Do NOT try to re-implement input type="number" but with nicer formatting. Do not even think about it. DO FUCKING NOT. It's a trap.9
-
Procrastination is not a bad thing as opposed to how society describes it. It's where ideas and new strategies are invented. Of course if you procrastinate all day then it may be an issue of not getting things done, but fighting it all the time does not help.
The mind is trying to tell you something, let it flow.6 -
For me is the same Friday than Monday. I do not know if it is good or bad. Maybe it is good because I do not hate my job or bad because I do not make so much fun on weekends. 😗😗
-
!rant
We got a new Macbook pro, 2017 model, i was all excited for it, my 2 coworkers and the manager not so much. But being that I am the only one that knows how to use it and will be working on new web related tech as well as advising our contractors and helping them with the ios and android part it was decided that I shall use this baby. So fucking excited. I get to use this baby at work as well as the overpowered work station that they already gave me :] dis gon b good mane1 -
Whenever you change your Instagram username it becomes unavailable completely even tho it's not taken. Not possible to get it back after changing.
Not sure if this a bug or a feature that they intended to have in their app...8 -
Delphi.
Why do I dislike it? Because it was fucking terrible (not sure about now, haven't touched it in years).6 -
Can you come up with something to spend money on that is even more useless and worthless than NFT?
I honestly tried. I thought of the most dumb crap but it had still some potential collection value or at the very least entertainment value.
NFTs don’t give you anything in return. It’s not a license, it’s not a currency, it isn’t shares, it isn’t art, not entertainment, not physical, not limited to some domain so not suitable to be collected by collectors.
You can’t even brag about owning it because you are owning just a kind of reference to it and not the actual thing. It is not like an ownership certificate because the seller of the NFT doesn’t even have the rights to sell the ownage for it, or the thing is not ownable. And if it was ownable, an NFT wouldn’t make you the official owner of it, because NFTs are not official.
I started to think about it because I can’t believe how many people spend so much money on literally nothing.
So, seriously let me know if you can up with something that beats NFTs in that regard.10 -
A new way appeared in my life.
Everything related to cars, metal and motor engines.
I may or may not have to dissapoint some people with it, but I am not going to be a dev I guess.
It was all fun and chill. Do not worry. I am not going to leave this awesome place haha, just felt like mentioning it. :)8 -
When you go from compiling/testing code on every line change to not checking for hours and it just works when you run it.
😎
Not always, but sometimes. -
Screen real estate is the first thing your device will run out of as it ages. Not the battery and not RAM.
-
So what if my screen is dirty? I'm not asking you a question, not to look at it, mind your own business!
-
I love keybase! Great application but not many of my friends and coworkers use it so have not that much usecase for it.😥
-
Trying to write some JavaScript (still learning it)
Why does the fucking
(function() {
})();
not work for starting a function below it?
Or above... I tried to fiddle with it too much, I'm just gonna leave it for now19 -
I just wasted a few hours by not realizing that array.prototype.concat does not act upon the array calling it but rather that it returns a new concatenated one :/
-
"Ok. I need to gather a bit more information to pinpoint the cause. When you say it is not working, how precisely is it not working? Does the program not open at all? If it does open, is there a specific action that you can do to reliably cause it to fail? Is it not working on only one computer, or is it failing on all computers?"
"When you click the icon it say to call support"
1 -
I cannot resister for Deloitte website because it required a strong password as the following:
•It must contain between 6 and 32 characters. Use only characters from the following set: ! # $ % & ( ) * + , - . / 0123456789 : ; < = > ? @ ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ [ \ ] _ ` abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz { | } ~
•It must not contain more than 2 identical consecutive characters (AAA, iiii, $$$$$ ...).
• It must not contain your user name.
• It must not contain your email address.
I tried several times but I cannot do it.
Please help
3 -
Learning to use logging in Python for an existing application.
🙇Feeling enlightened looking at the first log file output.3 -
Just turned on a client's computer and am shocked that they keep their logins straight. Basically there are two logins, but one says "$USER1's Girl" and the other says "$USER2's Man."
If I were them, I would be clicking on the one with my name, not looking for my SO's name...3 -
Anyone from Service Based IT Companies.? How much it really sucks to convince everyone around you about the idea you want to implement, but it cannot because the client is not happy and if he is not happy the management is also not happy. Its like we are chained to the chairs and systems, not letting us look at the outside world, where elegant solutions exists for smiple problems.
-
I have published my app, it is stable and functional. Design is simple but not ugly. I do not have much downloads. What can I do to make users to try it?4
-
So...about companies having way to big expectations on their job ads descriptions: Me being the new guy in all of this, of course I'm looking for more informations on the field everywhere. One day I came across a video on youtube posted by Eli the Computer Guy, and he was describing (caricaturing) this exact problem. You should look it up.
I'm not sure if he himself is a valuable source/resource of knowledge, but it did help me to understand this problem to some extent.
Hope it helps you too.6 -
I heard I should not allow users to inject arbitrary text into my webpage without sanitizing it. Is it a clean solution to just eval it on the (node) server, and if it runs not post it because it's obviously JS and not just text?
Any opinions on that?11 -
Not entirely sure why I'm not excited about blockchain.
And yet, I see job postings related to it everywhere.
What's so special about it?4 -
Warning - Not IT related.
Long ago, I had a chemist professor who told us a story. She worked in a laboratory where they have studied cristal formations, so basically made a liquid highly capable to form cristals, and they watched them forming, doing tests and so on. In the meantime new building of the campus opened and they had to move the lab to the new location, which was a fourth floor of newly made building. Few of them started to work there even before they moved the old materials and equipment and they started few cristalisation studies, the interesting part is that the cristals didn't formed. She said that at the end they had many cups with prepared liquid and apsolutely no cristals for weeks, but one day the lead researcher arrived with the old, already formed cristals, from the old lab, and toon those inside of the room with prepared cups all the cristals started to form at the same time. After telling us a story she asked us not to tell this to anyone because the science currently doesn't accept this phenomenon and we will be demonised and looked fools it the scientific community.
This story made a hole in my brain...
It was like 10 years ago, and as a problem solver I still have sometimes some weird ideas about it, and strange explanations comming from nothing, and without any deep understanding of quantum physics or even cristalisation. :D1 -
PHP guys: Magento is so rampant nowadays. Are you currently using or studying it? If not, do you plan on studying / using it even if it is not a job requirement? 🤔9
-
Guys, please don't scream at me :D
i need a tool to be installed on ubuntu that check if a specific process is running or not, if not then it starts it automatically22 -
Management fired the catfish hire!
The person who showed up was not the person on the phone. It took three months for the team to convince them it was not the same person.5 -
Not being sure about if the way I did or implemented a feature/functionality was the best practice and if not, is it worth it to try to come with a better way of doing it? I get paranoid about having problems showing up now because I did something not thinking ahead in the past1
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I don't even know that i should say it was a good problem or a bad one, i was programming a magnetometer sensor in both spi and i2c. I was tired of not working
I touched the sensor it dropped off!!! It was not soldered well!!!! At the problem was not from the code1 -
Ive got a nes that does not work it appers that it is not dettecting the cart. Ive tryed blowing out the port with a compressor but that did not work. Any other sugestions?3
-
I know it !
But when it finally works (reSharper) it's really not 'that' bad.
But my poor AMD Ryzen 9 3900X is not good enough I think lol.
About 30 seconds init time.
2 -
Weeeee for machines with superficial attributes making them look like people !
KAGOME KAGOME
https://youtube.com/watch/...
theres some of that uniqueness as it applies to logic.
logic dictates a system only works if the people who are part of it want it to work as it should, not to their own agendas which make it not work just have the superficial appearance of working which makes it not the intended system.
but still a system of some sort.1 -
I tried to make a post with a picture, but it did not work. I even scaled it down to 25kb and decreased resolution heavily. Tried png and jpg. The hell is it not working from desktop and from a phone?2
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How do you check if your input string does not have numbers it? If not then say enter a number? JavaScript please22
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Nothing is as fucked up as it seems, you have this, you'll figure it out, if you can't fix it, scrap it, don't stress yourself out, it's not worth it etc.
Current boss is the best.. Helped me a bunch, not only with how to tackle coding but life in general. -
I haven't seen this posted on here but it gave me a good laugh and some cheer when stressed with work so here's some joy for you ranters.
http://ibiblio.org/harris/... -
Fuck you creator of that video: https://youtube.com/watch/...
this shit does not work.
At line:
const app = createApp(App);
"Uncaught TypeError: Object(...) is not a function"
wtf. Or fuck vue? maybe in another place I did something wrong but I cannot see? And error is written by idiot. What object? createApp object? Then why it is not a fuction? I have imported it as was in the fucking video
import {createApp} from 'vue'
so how the fuck it can be not a function?
DId
console.log(createApp)
and it shows it is fucking undefined. So yea, it is not a fuction.2
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