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Dear future self,
Next time you're working on the project's routes, be sure that people don't have to be logged in to login.
It will make your life easier.
Regards,
Your past self that is tired to be this retarded.7 -
Days and days, 5+ hours later I finally figured out the issue.
The client is just fucking retarded, that's all.
5+ hours of my life wasted, much awesome!9 -
Boss: make this thing
Me: yeah no worries. Where is the spec?
Boss: We don't have enough one but we outsourced the design so call him
Designer: haven't started yet
Me: excellent
Boss: I'm going on holiday. I'll leave this to you.
Me: erm ok. I'm having a few problems getting stuff out of the designer though.
*2 weeks later and still no designs*
Boss: I'm back. Where is the progress?!
Me: indeed.
*1 week later i get half designs that sort of make sense*
Boss: hurry up!
*1 week later*
Me: designer you're busting my balls here
Designer: yeah lol
Me to boss: still having problems. No idea what I'm doing.
Boss: deal with it
*2 days later*
PM: we are demoing it to clients tomorrow
Me: brilliant. I'll become a magician then.
* Meeting goes well and no one notices the thing is a bit buggy*
*2 days later*
Me to boss and pm: you already know whats going on but I'll keep trying.
Boss: ok it's just a proof of concept anyway.
Designer: yeah here's the rest of the designs lol
*1 week later, the designs made no sense, no idea what they wanted but hey it's a proof of concept so I'll just do my best...*
*suddenly again, hey you have 1 week before we sell it. Lol. smashes a product together as fast as humanly possible, due to half designs and no time to do it right even html classes and CSS aren't right - didn't know things would be repeated at the time. No time to fix entire thing. Luckily just a proof of concept*
New senior developer: hey boss just said this is being sold tomorrow.
Me: wtf..It's a proof of concept and i was given longer...
New senior developer: no
Me: :(
Senior developer and all colleagues: it's full of bugs and doesn't work
Me: yes that will happen without specs, random tight deadlines, no designs that made sense and a total of about a week and a half to make an entire system for multiple user types to make applications, send messages, post jobs, handle all paperwork and move paperwork among different user types as they go through applications. I told everyone what was going on but i get no support...
*Silence*
Boss: wtf i gave you so long! All i know is my entire staff is working on a product that should be done ages ago
Me: ok, however i have said almost every day i need-
Boss: I'm not interested
*I finish my placement year and never get any promised work or the job offer*
Seems legit?16 -
Non-dev coworker (ndc) sees me using google chrome: I don't understand why chrome is so popular. I hate it and don't know why anyone would use it.
Me: what browser do you use?
NDC: internet explorer.
Me: why do you like ie better than chrome?
NDC: it does everything chrome can do and it's free.
Me: ie can NOT do everything chrome can do and chrome is free. You just have to download it from google.
NDC: no I read that chrome is proprietary software and why would I pay to use it when ie is free.
Me: ie is also proprietary software. Proprietary doesn't necessarily mean it costs money it's just not open source. Plus ie is not free. You paid for it when you bought the windows license that came with your computer.
NDC: no ie was already on the computer when I bought it so I didn't have to pay for it.
Me: it was included in the price of the computer but you still paid for it.
NDC: whatever I'm going to keep using ie because it's free for me.
ARE YOU RETARDED???27 -
Today I got to my new office. After booting my PC I noticed, that my phone-client isn't working.
I wrote an Incident to our helpline, telling them my phone isn't working.
After one hour I got an mail:
"Dear XYZ, we couldn't reach you at your phone. Please call back so we can fix your issue"
FUCK YOU WTF! ARE YOU GUYS RETARDED? READ YOUR FUCKING INCIDENTS! MOTHERFUCKING CUNTS!
11 -
Was today national 'lets not use our brains and common sense' day or something?!?
People coming with the most fucking RETARDED questions.
'ive spend hours to try and figure out why my mail isnt sending,?!'
MAYBE TRY SPELLING YOUR FUCKING OWN EMAIL ADDRESS CORRECTLY?!?!?!
Tons more of the kind of shit that you can solve yourself within three FUCKING seconds.
I'm so fucking done with today.10 -
When we found out MySQL utf8 isn't actually utf8..... it's a proprietary subset of utf8 that only includes up to Unicode 255..... and there is a separate "utf8mtb4" that is actual utf8.8
-
*Me working on the security system of the notes app thingy*
"hmm, should check if a users' ip is valid, let's look for some online services..."
*can't find a good one without rate limits*
😞
*hold on, I wrote one myself 🤣*
I am so fucking retarded sometimes.7 -
!dev but fuck it.
I'd like to talk to the interior designers of the new dutch NS sprinter trains.
Who in the flying FUCK puts the SOS button right where you'd rest your shoulder at the STANDING SEATS?!?
SERIOUSLY HOW FUCKING RETARDED CAN YOU BE? YES I ACCIDENTALLY LEANED AGAINST ONE TODAY.
What the actual fuck.22 -
so,i made a website and uploaded it to my paid hosting...some pages were blank when accessed.did some testing and found out that was a php problem.contacted the support to enable error reporting for testing...he said that it can not be done...and that my code was the problem....spent 3h testing like a blind man...then my mother comes and sais this "maybe it's not compatible"she knows nothing about programming....then it struck me....fucking different php versions...i think i'm retarded sometimes...10
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You know what´s really retarded?
How HP decided to put the delete key next to the power button on their Elitebooks (and make the power button part of the top keyboard row)
23 -
We had a short power outage this morning. 30 min later I got an "urgent" call that someone's "computer" was not working in another branch of our company.
Not one person in that branch could figure this out so after them repeatedly messaging and calling me for around an hour I decided to come over.
I found out that the power wall plug to the monitor has a switch on it which this person accidentally kicked...
I fixed his problem in around 20 seconds. This same employee was one that somehow had his email account previously "hacked" and 8000 phishing emails were sent from his account in 1 hour.
I honestly think it is amazing people like this can even use a computer at all...5 -
Disabling pasting into a password field in 2020 with password managers, is retarded. That's it that's the rant. Doesn't matter if you think password managers are good or not. Its still retarded that there's a 40 something year old dumbfuck manager who told a web designer at EA to disable pasting into a fucking password field because he was dumb enough to think it stopped hackers or some shit like that.15
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Disclaimer: non dev related.
So I went to a festival today. What is the most stupid question you can ask at a festival?
And the winner is
And the winner is...
'why are you sweating?'
THE WHAT? ARE YOU FUCKING RETARDED?!?
DETAIL ONE: I'M AT A FUCKING FESTIVAL
DETAIL TWO: I'M DANCING MY ASS OFF
DETAIL TWO: EVERYONE IS MOTHERFUCKING FUCKING FUUUUUCK DANCING.
Mother of god, stupidity knows no fucking boundries 😲20 -
Completely losing my shit over a 'class Predis\Autoloader already defined' error.
Just noticed that I already created the object five lines up
How fucking retarded am I?! I mean, I've been debugging this for a WHOLE FUCKING HOUR.
Let's just blame it on the alcohol 😅7 -
When i said that i use Linux, 3/4 of the class stared at me like i have a mental problem.
Then i said that i use duckduckgo and they stared at me like i was really retarded.
The sad part is that i'm in computer science department and my colleagues have not any clue about anything else than microsoft/google.11 -
Friend: "I made my page responsive"
Maybe the layout is responsive, but your articles are not. Wanna know why?
BECAUSE YOU USE FUCKING IMAGES INSTEAD OF AN HTML STRUCTURE TO DISPLAY YOUR ARTICLES7 -
Hey man can you fix my tv, computer, toaster, phone, or hack this phone i found, can you hack me a wifi, can you make me a website/app i have a really good idea. (For free of course)
Hey man you only need a good idea for an app then become rich.
(Insert countless of other retarded requests here)
Someone kill me6 -
The last year my school installed MagicBoards (whiteboard with beamer that responses to touch) in every class room and called itself "ready for the future of media". What they also got is A FUCKING LOW SPEC SERVER RUNNING DEBIAN 6 W/O ANY UPDATES SINCE 2010 WHICH IS DYING CONSTANTLY.
As I'm a nice person I asked the 65 y/o technician (who is also my physics teacher) whether I could help updating this piece of shit.
Teacher: "Naahh, we don't have root access to the server and also we'll get a new company maintaining our servers in two years. And even if we would have the root access, we can't give that to a student."
My head: "Two. Years. TWO YEARS?! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME YOU RETARDED PIECE OF SHIT?! YOU'RE TELLING ME YOU DON'T HAVE TO INSTALL UPDATES EVEN THOUGH YOU CREATE AN SSH USER FOR EVERY FUCKING STUDENT SO THEY CAN LOGIN USING THEIR BIRTH DATE?! DID YOU EVER HEAR ABOUT SECURITY VULNERABILITIES IN YOUR LITTLE MISERABLE LIFE OR SOUNDS 'CVE-2016-5195' LIKE RANDOM LETTERS AND NUMBERS TO YOU?! BECAUSE - FUNFACT - THERE ARE TEN STUDENTS WHO ARE IN THE SUDO GROUP IF YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT IS!"
Me (because I want to keep my good grades): "Yes, that sounds alright."13 -
*on DevRant*
"I'm bored, let's do something else"
*closes DevRant*
*looks at screen*
*opens DevRant*
wtf am I retarded?14 -
Check this out.
Brazil is coming to a halt right now because of a distribution blockage by the truck drivers.
Gasoline tripled the litter price from yesterday.
Gas stations are going empty.
Air-fucking-ports are out of diesel/gas.
Public transportation might stop tomorrow.
And my boss "will consider" home office, wtf dude, are you retarded?14 -
Fucking son of a bitch force pushed to git effectively deleting 4 hours of my work and was keeping his mouth shut for two days while pushing ontop of that bullshit during these days and completely minifiying that file I was working on to make sure that he makes my life miserable.Fuck this fucking shitty ass retarded fucker for doing this SECOND time already!11
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The reason why I changed my username ( I'll just be honest here )
I was working on a website. I noticed that entries were submitting yesterday but today new entries were not showing up on database. It was like my database refused to insert new rows but there was no new error in log. I kept trying for almost half an hour, read all the answers on stackoverflow, read docs, tried different methods. Nothing worked. I was fucked up. Completely fucked up.
In frustration, I just stared my database for 10 mins without a single blink, and then I noticed this thing 'showing 25 out of 78 rows'
(-_-)
I clicked on 'show all'
AAAAAAND
I felt retarded.
Okay I can give an excuse that last time I saw a database was a year ago, but still.. how retarded you need to be to not see this FUCKIN 'SHOW ALL' when it is on the TOP of the FUCKIN TABLE!!6 -
Job listing: "We work with the VBA language which is an addition to the classic Visual Basic language..."
No. VBA is not an addition to VB. It's his retarded brother5 -
Just saw a blue screen of death In the top of a taxi cab. Had no idea these kind of signs were running Windows. Why are so many companies buying licenses for Windows when they could so easily use Linux ?21
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Saw a girl from my uni upload a photo of her graduation with the following text:
while(!(succeed = try()));
I'm staring at it for 5 mins and i can't figure out if i'm retarded and should drop out of uni or that statement doesn't make sense.73 -
my retarded landlord upon finding out that I have neither Viber nor Skype started doubting that I'm working in IT10
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I’ve been job hunting for a month with very few calls when I realised my resume didn’t have my phone number or my email.
I’ve been interviewing for half a decade.
Why yes, I am indeed retarded thanks for asking.7 -
I fucking hate people who tell me what i should do when they obviously dont know a fucking inch of anything related to the dev world fucking idiots ruining my day with fucking retarded orders.
I AM THE DEV UR THE FUCKING MANAGER STAY AT UR FUCKING PLACE3 -
Yesterday I stayed at home sick. Had a bad case of the EXPLOSIVE DIARRHEA FROM HELL. Was feeling ok but could not walk away from me throne.
Went in today cuz the lead was not gonna be there and shit always breaks on Freyja's day as we all know.
1 and a half hours before we clock out and go home someone calls saying that students are trying to drop from classes at the last minute and our app ain't doing it.
I "fixed" the app last week and ran a small login test. It work so I thought it was fine. Stupid me for making unprofessional and retarded assumptions.
Manager freaks out. The entire school freaks out. Coworker lols cuz he ain't got to work on it. I start mind debugging the entire bitcheridoo.
45 minutes later...and I was able to successfully go through almost 15k lines of code of php/html/js code and fucking FIXED it with tests and all for real.
Went at it hard. Babe ass manager was like 0.0 and then (͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Called head office and told them everything was undr control.
Dropped the phone like a mic. Mic drop.
Then I looked at manager and coworker and said "ya I fucked up, but I am still the king"
Both nodded in agreement.
Everyone got wet with my sheer awesome troubleshooting php master skills.
Got home thinking about how boss I am.
Fucking Texas af b. Can't touch this heat. The rangers still suck and so do the cowboys. The astros and the texans don't exist because there is only room for one. Go spurs.
Still have diarrhea.
Fuck yeah.8 -
Python be like
"Yeah this is the absolute best beginner language to learn programming concepts"
Python also be like
"Yeah well we couldnt implement 70% of programming concepts because the ast is retarded but heres a library for drawing 3d cats with a printer"30 -
5 nEw JavaAcriPt frAmeWorkS foR 2020
...
.....
...
this is why people keep thinking us in the JavaScript world are fucking retarded.11 -
You have to wonder why our retarded education system still forces students to learn Pascal(Delphi)... 2nd most hated language in the world... I am learning this stinky pile of shit right now because I have my school-leaving exams from it tomorrow but oh man the pain...
26 -
Did you know?
Ubuntu 16.04 can't build ROS.
Fsck!
I look retarded running a VM of Ubuntu 14 in Ubuntu 165 -
What's the most stupid/raging way you broke a device ?
Me? I fell asleep in my bed, while reading some rants.. on my fucking phone and broke it while sleeping on it18 -
I have a deadline in 3 hours and my iMac mouse battery is EMPTY AND BECAUSE OF APPLES FUCKING RETARDED DESIGN I HAVE TO FLIP IT BACKWARDS SO IT CAN RECHARGE AND I HAVE TO WAIT TILL THE BATTERY IS ALIVE WHAT THE FUCK WHO DOES THIS WHO THE FUCK BUILT SUCH A RETARDED DESIGN, WHY NOT HAVE THE USBC HOLE ON THE SIDES??????
30 -
"Hey, I've noticed that when I run this script, I get an error message. It says it has failed to do step x"
A: "Have you tried running it with sudo"
"Yeah, that works"
B: "NO WAY YOU SHOULD NEVER USE SUDO THAT'S A MAJOR SECURITY RISK, ARE YOU RETARDED RUNNING THINGS WITH SUDO IS EVIL"
"Do you have an alternative solution?"
*trjirp trjirp* 🦗🦗🦗6 -
Removes stubborn programs? Oh by 'stubborn' you mean the kind of programs where i click on the X on a window and the default button on the confirmation dialog isn't the one that closes the window but instead I have to click on 'cancel'? Yeah I fucking hate those programs too.
The fucking cunts who write the code for this should be making subway sandwiches for a living because they don't deserve programming as a job.
4 -
When you and your team just gave a thousand reasons why you should do it the right way and your PM just nodded and continue to argue for the retarded way to do it cause it's faster ..
2 -
Changing default branch name from "master" to "main" is just one more entry in the already very long list of "things sane people must do because some retarded american woke up one day and decided to be offended".
I am so fucking tired of the entire world having to accommodate to the first-world-problems of some spoiled brat just because they happen to be american.38 -
Everyone that says you can't get viruses in Linux because only .exe compiled programs can contain malicious code or some bullshit like this is a fucking retarded
Sorry I had to say it10 -
Well shit.
Language features-wise Rust has a great edge over its main competitor(which seems to be Golang even though they can't really be competitors)
Rust has a better package manager with Cargo.
It also has better documentation. It also has
Wait for it...
....
A better website and a non retarded looking mascot.
TEE HEEEE9 -
"I don't see women as objects, each woman is in a class of their own! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"
- People who have no fucking clue how OOP works
Objects are instantiations of classes, you poor, retarded bastards. You saw those two words while skimming your 1st year college textbook, made this joke, promptly changed to some useless English degree because you cried after your "hello world" program didn't run, and never looked back to see the damage you had done.
I know the joke is the word play but word play word play puns are retarded anyways. Everything about this pun is awful.8 -
Facebook was forcing me to use their messenger app to read my messages on my mobile. I used to get the desktop version and everything was annoying but worked.
Now they blocked this by redirecting when trying to do that.....
....
....
...
..
.
ARE YOU RETARDED, YOU SHITHEADED DICKS?17 -
Me: "ok for the following changes you must pay the following charge because it's not in the scope"
Customer: "bUt tHiS Is Not whAt I wanT, wOnT pAY thE ResT iF yoU arE nOt DoiN It blablabla"
Marketing: "please do it for him"
Fuck me.1 -
So, it has been 2 months and a half since I started working. So far I learned two important things.
1. Clients are fucking retards. Like really fucked up shit. I don't even understand how they got the job.
2. Working for a company is nothing like an internship. I now realize much they treated me like shit during my internship compared to my current job. I did my internship in a startup and I now work in a big multinational company, I feel way more welcome in this company than in the startup
So far I really enjoy my work and I've been learning more for the past 2 months than during my studies.6 -
The fucking government in my country has put 15℅ sales tax on all internet downloads and subscriptions.
As a consumer and seller, this is unacceptable.
WTF?!
Governments are retarded!13 -
Javascript being Javascript...
var date = new Date()
Mon Aug 13 2018 09:17:28 GMT+0200 (Mitteleuropäische Sommerzeit)
date.getDay()
1
date.getDate()
13
date.getFullYear()
2018
date.getYear()
1186 -
Writing a Firefox add-on which analyzes the current webpage's links and puts a warning if one of those links to one of the prism (surveillance network) integrated services/companies.
Nearly ready enough for testing (real working version) when I suddenly realize: web pages can request resources without links.
Gotta rewrite the fucker partly now.
How fucking stupid can I be. 😐11 -
I woke up early and thaught I could finish some database work today.
Beeing tipsy I deleted two production tables and shit my pants.
Luckily I do backups since the last retarded db-deletion.8 -
"Could you make me a nice logo really quick? I have no budget"
.. sure, just let me press the "make Logo"-Button in Illustrator -
If your JavaScript and css is not loading on your server, make sure your folder and files have the right permissions.
Two days of running around like a headless chicken because I'm retarded... 😫4 -
Sometimes I really fucking hate this company
The code is an absolute shitshow filled with static classes, untestable and duplicate code, on top of that my boss doesn’t like open source
Yeah so i’m not allowed to use a mapping library or something because “Uhhh like uhh we don’t have a contract with the company so who knows what’ll happen when the maintainers leave the project”
I understand his reasoning but it’s an absolutely retarded reasoning especially considering most of the .NET platform is open source nowadays
Writing a webapp from scratch now as well and I HAVE to use vanilla javascript and AngularJS 1.5 even though all the developers here told me they would like to upgrade to Typescript and Angular 2+ but it’s never gonna happen I suppose
Oh and he doesn’t like TDD and our only product is SAAS so imagine the amount of bugs being pushed simply because we don’t have time to write tests or even manually test, let alone refactor our horseshit codebase
AND i have to pay for gas myself which takes 200€ out of my bank account a month just for driving to work whilst I’m only getting a mediocre pay
Have a job interview tomorrow and another one on tuesday4 -
They sent me 4 challenges from hackerrank as part of the interview process, classified as easy. I'm stuck on the 3 one.
I guess I'm fucking retarded after all 😂14 -
*me calculating rsa*
"aight.. Public key is 9 and n"
*calculating private key*
*recalculating cause I fucked up*
*recalculating cause I'm retarded*
*3rd recalculation*
"ok, I figured out my private key is 9 (and n)"
.... Wait a second.1 -
Often I look at my seemingly perfect code 30cm away from screen, mumble "WTF", while asking me why it is not working.
My boss might think I'm retarded... -
Retarded senior web dev:
shouting 'STOP' to the ones who pointed out his design flaws
cannot accept a js file with more than 100 lines.
nitpicking others not limited to his owm group
eager to try bleeding edge alpha builds packages for large application
left the company before finishing the project he started2 -
Found a rather annoying Windows 11 bug
explorer.exe, if the window is unfocused, the window buttons are correctly sized. But if you focus the window, the "maximize" button goes all retarded.
11 -
Retarded person I met today : "JS is gay cos you require strict mode for blah blah blah"
Me (and my webdev friend): pfft...
[Shows our ESLint Styling rules]
him: "o-oh... How the f-"6 -
I don't think I'm smart, but why most of the people are so retarded??
They want to just make the code work and skip home!
Not caring about how their code effects the whole system!3 -
Retarded client sent us 25 minutes worth of videos of "bugs". Guess I am getting cancer after I watch them. The way he works on PC, the mouse movements, the speed, ...are just magnificient. My stomach is getting more and more sick each minute passes. Pray for my health.22
-
Is anyone else hard on themselves when making a console application since it’s not as fancy as a GUI application? Idk why but I am. But like I prefer the console applications for performance and simplicity but I’m still hard on myself idk
TLDR I’m retarded
Also thanks to one of my last posts comments for clarifying it should be at the bottom
TLDR2 I’m even more retarded5 -
My developer career has ended before I even start. After failing to get a job, I have started a business men services company. Maybe in the future, I will include software development to the business. So no more rants from my side at least for one year.
Fuck you all fucking retarded companies who wants junior developers with the same experience of senior developers.6 -
Trying to find Python documentation for Microsoft's fucking retarded CRM is about as fun as brushing my peehole with a toothbrush. Fuck.5
-
I hate it when people sort numbers in a drop down box like so:
[1, 10, 11, 12...19, 2, 20, 21...29, 3, 30, 31...]
This is just pure infuriating...5 -
WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ONLY KEEPING THE LAST 10 BUILD ARTIFACTS IN ARTIFACTORY?!
THAT IS LITERALLY THE OPPOSITE OF HOW YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO USE IT
NOW I CAN'T ROLL BACK PROD CHANGES TO A WORKING VERSION BECAUSE IT LITERALLY DOESN'T EXIST ANYMORE
FUCK YOU, IT'S YOUR FIRE NOW9 -
microsoft fucking teams.
why don't you just work like you should, huh??
every fucking day it seems to be the case, that you, you ugly little retarded fuckshit, are the fucking reason that my headset disconnects from its usb dongle and needs to be re-paired.
slack works like a charm, but you..?!
in-fucking-credible.9 -
FUCK YOU PHP, WHY THE FUCK DO YOU GIVE ME DECEMBER 1ST WHEN I DO
strtotime('-1 month', '12/31/2015)
USING DateTime PRODUCES THE SAME FUCKING RESULT. ARE YOU FUCKING RETARDED OR WHAT?
YEAH I KNOW NOVEMBER DOESN'T HAVE 31ST BUT YOU COULD AT LEAST RETURN 30TH OR EVEN RAISE A WARNING, YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT.10 -
Create this fucking account just to say: FUCK XAMARIN!
Mono is great on Linux, but Xamarin.Android is a GAY RETARD!
Fucking Xamarin.Android apps are retarded, wait for them 3 fucking seconds and a simple Hello World app doesn't start.
Retarded Xamarin.Forms make the whole pile of shit a lot worse using fucking abstractions and stuff. And the geniuses at Uno Platform does not make this shit any better.
Why don't those nerds at Xamarin make a way to compile all C# code to native JVM bytecode and provide all C# core libraries AS NATIVE JAVA LIBRARIES, RATHER THAN LOADING A NEW USELESS RETARDED VIRTUAL MACHINE ON THE JVM?
So that's it. Guess there's no way to write good Android apps using C#.10 -
Providing a web site to pay electricity and other services, but guess what? THE CONNECTION IS NOT SeCuRe !! (What can possibly can go wRoNg).
This retarded country have a lot of skilled people, but the dinosaurs who in charge are literally afraid of new technology.
Wake up bitches, it's almost 2020 -
Wasted a bloody hour today wondering why a route was giving weird errors...
Turns out I inadvertently wrote a for ... in ... loop instead of a for ... of ...
It's my bloody fault for being retarded, but I swear this unholy mix of JavaScript and python I'm dealing with is doing bad things to my brain. 😔5 -
That's it. I'm fucking retarded. I'm just so fucking retarded. I'm so fucking supid, it makes me wonder why do I even keep trying. I'm not sure I even have the energy in my fingers to keep typing this stupid rant.
I've been banging my head against this stupid fucking issue for A WEEK. Digging into the documentation, trying different library versions, trying to move stuff around even if it didn't make sense, trying to use different approaches because maybe I was missing something, or maybe I didn't understand some concept.
Surely spawning a child function from a parent can't be that hard, right?
Nothing.
Even tried it on a different OS - who knows, maybe it's Windows doing some if its magic fuckery?
Still nothing.
"Wait, why am I calling this function directly instead of calling its parent?"11 -
Why do so many beginners gave this retarded notion that freelancing is easy? Little shits really expect to read one HTML tutorial and start making money off the internet?8
-
The fact people are still tryna have Android phones vs iPhone debates is retarded. Just use the got damn phone and get over yourself thinking it fucking matters.15
-
*Client changes products config*
*Client raises issue about his own outcome*
I spent 2 fucking days on code while issue was configuration2 -
I've got three 2-hour exams tomorrow back-to-back. I've been studying my ass off all week.
How the fuck is the College administration allowed to put student like me into this retarded and needlessly challenging predicament?
Guess I'll be drinking plenty of red bull tomorrow... 😰8 -
I'm a web dev who decided to take a shot at mobile development (My first mobile app mind you). I'm writing a mobile app and one of it's features is communicating to my server via websockets.
So I write the code, click to send the data and my server doesn't receive it. Fuck. I check why. I log everything. Nothing.
I spend several of hours and I'm exhausted by this point so i call one of our mobile developers to help me. Turns out my emulator didn't have a WiFi module. FUCK.
Alright so I compile it to an apk and install it on my phone. I popped open a terminal and started my local node server.
I click on the mobile app...
NOTHING LOGS. FUUUUUUCK.
And this is the best part.
Apparently I deleted the console.dir call from my server that executed when it received some data from an emitter.
I only thought of this last night at 2am so I got up and checked. Yep. Kill me.1 -
Ubuntu: Lulz your trackpad drivers don't work and there's no solution other than compiling them yourself or something it might not even work because it's for a different model but just hope and pray ok? also your wifi obviously fucking won't work. What, are you retarded?
Manjaro: Ye I gotchu. Mouse works outta the box. WiFi too10 -
Not only did my boss insist on setting up roles and permissions for our app how he designed them, even after I spent 4 or 5 hours trying to convince him to let me do it differently, but he has now fucked our entire system.
Under this model of roles and permissions you cannot enforce them on the backend by any means, and now we have a service dealing with users including resetting passwords and changing details that does not use authentication. That's right, aurhe tocation and not even talking about authorization now. Good job.
I honestly wish companies like this would get hacked and fucked over as soon as they did it wrong because I can't believe how retarded some people are.3 -
i really wish Python would not have the presence it has on Machine Learning. I can think of a handful of languages that would be better suited for it and even though I don't hate Python it has a lot of things that just make me say uuuuuuugh when writing it. It al comes down from this: treating syntactic whitespace in a special way is fucking retarded.11
-
Is there a worst piece of junk than Sharepoint? 32gb ram on a dedicated server, clean install... Runs like a dead cat that was ran over by a train several times and full of retarded errors... Sigh...
I'll just go ram my head against the wall for a while2 -
I suck with the ladies :( I turned 25 last week and have only dated 1 girl because my retarded ass decided to ignore dating until I have time and my situation is stable and now that I'm old and don't know how to get into a relationship I'm starting to regret my past decisions...17
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I bring you all another gem from my computer science course, this time from my OOP class.
The first assignment we made for this class was a simple CLI shop, where you would have basically three main classes:
- A Product class that you extend to create different types of products.
- A Cart class that manages a list of products (basically an ArrayList<Product>) and has some useful methods
- A CLI class to display a simple interface to the user and call methods on a Cart.
Basic OOP stuff, so far so good.
Then for our second assignment the teacher asked us to make Cart a generic class, where you would say Cart<Bagel> and you would only be able to put bagels in it. This makes absolutely no fucking sense, this is not a good use case for generic types since
1) you would never limit your customer's cart to one type of product at compile time.
2) in Cart, you have to cast the generic type to Product to extract any information from the product, like when getting product prices to calculate the total price, so might as well use a fucking ArrayList<Product>
I'm just saying what he's asking us to do has (to our fictional shop's business logic) absolutely no advantage over subtyping.
Also, why the fuck teach generic constraints when you can just tell your students "just cast T to Product", right?
Like fucking hell, couldn't you spend like 10min to come up with a decent assignment that actually teaches generic types the right way? ffs
And just so no one can say "but wut simple assignment would you give to teach students generic types?", here's a simple and much, much better alternative: implementing your own ArrayList. Done. Can't get much better than that, it's a legit use case and teaches you the basics.
Sorry man, you're a great person, you really are, but you suck as a teacher.3 -
Ran Windows RAM diagnostic tools because I was too lazy to get my Linux USB-stick. Ran for 20 minutes, restarted - "There are hardware problems present."
NO SHIT. No info how many errors, no log file mentioned, no code or anything. Something happened. How retarded can a diagnostic tool be?
Guess laziness gets you punished immediately...1 -
In some unpredictable turn of events, ignoring my PR for 6 months will cause said code to not be aligned anymore with develop.
And it gets wilder: if you reject my PR for this retarded bullshit, I may not react in the civilest of ways.2 -
Fucking outlook, can't even render simple html.
Our company wanted a custom newsletter to send to our clients. Before vacation I dropped a few guidelines to our designer, how our newsletter should look. 640px width, common fonts for everyone to render properly, stuff like that. To my fucking surprise they managed to create the most designed newsletter I've seen. Custom font, custom letter sizings, negative row gaps, pixel to pixel image locations. After writing custom html for it and managing to get all perfectly in 3 hours, to my surprise I found out, that outlook is broken. FML
Now everything must be redesigned and simplified, just because I was naive enough to think, that all mail clients manage to render simple HTML...11 -
Apparently you can't call the imperial system retarded, as it hurts people.
I got flagged by a university admin for posting this picture to a science memes discord channel. How retarded is that?
God save us when this snowflake generation takes power and there is a war, famine, drought, flood, or God (or gods for that matter, or Flying Spaghetti Monster, don't get offended here!) forbid, aliens attack us.
I bet these people don't ever fly an Airbus because its FMC calls the pilot a retard.
https://youtu.be/vmbzKsqKQoI?t=35
22 -
Why I hate typescript. Bored during quarantine so thought I rant a little more about this.
1. Compilation time, typescript increases project compilation time from 1 second to 3-4 seconds, which is basically triple or quadruple the time if you don't know math.
2. You write a minimum of 30% more code.
3. Many libraries are not written in TS by default, which means you end up having to manually install a fuckton of @types/(pckg name) manually which is incredibly shit.
4. Typescript is an absolute pain in the ass when using dynamic libraries. Plus when it works, it usually ends up finding maybe 1-2 errors in your code MAX, completely not worth it.
5.JSDoc is 100 times better. (Still don't use it though).
6. I actually enjoy loosely typed languages, having your compiler being smart enough to tell what the type of your input is is much better than it assuming you're a fucking retard so it forces you to manually type everything.
P.S if you hate loosely typed languages, kindly resort to Angular, C#, Java or whatever and leave JS alone, cunt.41 -
If you think your app/code is too buggy and you feel ashamed, try Microsoft's lazy buggy retarded not user-friendly Skype for Business and you'll restore your confidence1
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If you think your legacy code is bad - this is what I came across in a system I'm refactoring this morning... and this isn't even the bug I was looking for.
1 -
People that upgrade to Windows 10 FREE by going to the... "special needs category"(people with special needs that could use the new things that Windows 10 has... like Cortana), but are perfectly normal... don't be ashamed of that... you were retarded enough to upgrade to Windows 10, so it's justified...
4 -
If you use ID selectors in a stylesheet for a component you reuse in the page multiple times you should be shot.4
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Hate when one of the devs get personally offended cause I log some bugs about his part of the app.. I know it is your child, nothing about you, it's a bit retarded, and doesn't do well with other kids.. :/
-
Why is it still painful, even with CSS5 and HTML5, to style a HTML checkbox???
I think it is retarded that you literally have to "hide" the checkbox and place your own box on it.8 -
https://youtu.be/4L4nQyGLjio
FUCK THIS GUY AND WHOEVER ELSE THINKS AI HAVING THE ABILITY TO PROGRAM IS A GOOD IDEA OR SUPPORTS IT OR TRIES TO DO IT. ITS NOT AND NEVER GOING TO BE A GOOD IDEA! AI ISNT DANGEROUS UNLESS YOU DO THIS KIND OF STUPID SHIT, DO YOU WANT US TO DIE? DO YOU WANT TO REPLACE YOUR OWN JOB WITH SOME AI? ARE YOU FUCKING RETARDED?43 -
Fuck I can't even. Remember all those rants (mine included) about how users are quite retarded and only report "omg smth wrong, help" without any explanaition or screen shot, or even worse WITH A WORTHLESS CROPPED OUT SCREENSHOT?!
USERS I GET, BUT FUCKING SENIOR DESKTOP SUPPORT GUY DOING SAME RETARDED IT DOES NOT WORK CAN U HELP THING IS MADDENNNNIINNGG
LEARN TO FUCKING READ THE FUCKING INSTRUCTIONS IN THE FUCKING ERROR DESCRIPTION, YES?
*Ahhh* 😄 -
> Opens heroku
> Opens application
> *this pipeline does not have an owner*
> *internal screaming*
> refresh
> "Ah okay, heroku is retarded"
> *sigh of relief*2 -
When you have a telephone interview for a Software Developer job and say something completely retarded within the first 20 seconds...
2 -
How Mark Zuckerberg tells Bill Gates that his company is retarded.
.
Whatsapp works with M$ Edge 13+
DOWNLOAD THE LATEST VERSION OF WINDOWS 10 or use Google Chrome, Firefox... 😂😂😂 -- No. you can't just download M$ Efge 13+ it won't work
7 -
Everyone wants faster programs, so doing more optimisations with GCC at -O3 instead of -O2 makes the program quite a bit larger, but... SLOWER. Makes sense, right? Why do you even have -O3 if it generates larger AND slower binaries than -O2?
Ah IC, it's because you use that level only on individual hot functions, not on the full program. How do I do that? Function attribute for optimisation. Cool. Uhm, what is the exact syntax? The fucking GCC documentation doesn't say that. When will devs finally learn to give bloody EXAMPLES?!
Googling around. Ah, with quotes, but without the leading hyphen it seems. Copy/paste. Compile again, tadaa: it's only a little bit but still FUCKING SLOWER than -O2!
GCC's -O3 is like that stupid kid at McD that ate like a damn horse, had to vomit afterwards and was even more hungry than before!13 -
I hate iOS. Everything works perfectly on windows / OS X on any browser, but then you have retarded iOS not understanding anything of the (simple) ES5 JavaScript I throw at it, and good luck debugging that when your Mac isn't with you.
Getting tired of Apple's shit3 -
I never understood how people have any problems with getting paid for freelancing work, when middleman/escrow platforms like upwork exist, just don't be retarded when applying for a job. I am so sick of those shit ass stories from people telling me "my client didnt pay meeee 😭😭😭" ITS YOUR FAULT. I never had any client not paying, if you don't have the option of escrow, then just fucking put remote execution via "update" system in for fucks sake or give remote control to the client while monitoring it, there is so much fucking ways to secure yourself, just don't be retarded and many clients instantly show their character when talking budget and turnaround time.15
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When you get this great idea at 2 am, code it out and the next day you wonder why you even bother to be a developer
-
CSS is utterly retarded but I can’t help but be impressed by how well the DOM still works in this day and age. The fundamental structure hasn’t changed since the 90s.15
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This Udacity course I'm taking for Android development thinks I'm too fucking retarded to use Variables. They also "taught" me that i++ exists. Java Knowledge is required for the course.
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Dear Facebook.
FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING CUNTS.
The next time you upgrade your piece of shit application on iOS and remove stuff from their place which makes me search all the way your crap battery vacuum application until i fuckin find it i will come to your office find that dumb zuckerberk and push the fuckin chair he sits at down to his throat.
Same goes for your retarded website.
Suckers.1 -
It seems like sensitive websites that need more priority to work fine are the ones that do not. I'm talking about government, school, bank, & service provider sites. Or it's just my retarded country.9
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Had a coding challenge for an interview. 2 questions and I passed all the tests on both questions. But I got an email from the recruiter saying that one of my questions didn’t have a working solution??? Wtf it passed all the tests, am I retarded?3
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You know those Jolly go lucky fucking always happy and usually slightly retarded ppl?
Yeah those, try having one of them thinking you're a free tech hotline..
My head hurts from all that brightness and stupidity that person emits -_- -
"let's put an advert right next to the login/registration area so everyone can see the ads"
Thanks for reminding why I love adblock, how retarded you are and why you should never be allowed to touch ux/ui.
f your theory about users != customers.
Hope better ads standards slaps in your face, HARD1 -
Am I the only one that can't stand non-maximized windows on Windows but hate maximized windows on Mac?
Could this be a psychological phenomenon in which the designs of these systems make you use them in a specific way? Or am I just retarded?
Anyone else does the same?9 -
I have a gitlab instance behind a reverse proxy at gitlab.mydoman.pizza (yeah my TLD is .pizza 😎🍕). I have a personal site hosted on GitHub pages. I have a CNAME record in GitHub repo pointing to mydomain.pizza. I have 4 A records on my domain registrar pointing to the GitHub pages server IP addresses. now both mydomain.pizza and myusername.github.io both go to my gitlab instance??¿¿ what the fuuuuuckkkkk?¿?¿1
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Was reading this blog. COBOL started as a low code application for managers to write code in a language close to English.
The more things change, the more they remain retarded.4 -
Updating angular and npm/node/whatever the fuck is the most difficult and convoluted thing ever
Web devs, you deserve better than this awful piece of shit cable mess of a fucking "framework" or whatever the fuck this retarded shit is meant to be2 -
Why do corporate douchebags keep hiring fucking cheap ass local hardware companies? What is this mysterious fucking attraction they have towards shitty IT?
My fucking phone literally has more RAM than my work laptop. I want to go home earlier just so I can get some actual work done on my non retarded personal laptop. -
Fucking product owners. Churning out retarded requirements every sprint and then complaining about how the requirements haven’t been met, just to add new retarded requirements the next sprint.
Hot tip, if your product owner is obsessed over apple events, tell the cunt to go buy a new Apple Watch and suck on apples trillion dollar market value. Fucking goofy cunts.2 -
I wouldn't have a problem with opinionated tools
Unfortunately, their opinions tend to be retarded1 -
I don't know if something changed on the go linters, the spec or whatever.
...... but I am so fucking glad that I don't get retarded "eXpoRteD FuNctioNs neeEd tO bE coMmenTed"
Fuck how I hate how these tools operate sometimes6 -
So just got news via comments about retarded devs leaving twilio creds. in their apps published to the app stores, attached below is an interesting snap of the document appthority has published, wonder who is getting beat up right now for leaking corporate meetings 😶
4 -
yes, you absolute fucking asshat, i would like to do more than JUST LOG FUCKING PALETTE TO THE FUCKING CONSOLE
ANY METHODS EXPOSED BY THIS? ANY OTHER OPTIONS? OR YOU JUST GONNA SHOW THAT YOU CAN LOG OUT THIS OBJECT
https://github.com/Vibrant-Colors/...
retarded documentation will be the end of us all i swear to fucking god (or at least me)
though reap what you sow, js devs just as retarded as the language i conceed
i've never seen such a large README and learned so little of what the fuck is going on or how to actually use any of the options1 -
Seriously, can we just all agree and fuck Epic Games? And also their shitty EAC. RIP Rocket League on Linux. What's next? Oh wait...there is almost nothing left...
The best thing how they act like their retarded Store is better than Steam. You can suck my dick idiots.8 -
Which fucking cunt keeps thinking putting redo on ctrl+shift+z or some other retarded shortcut is a good idea
Lost a whole paragraph of technical explanation because I didn't realize and then couldn't redo my panic undo 😠11 -
Yesterday had fogged mind all day long. I felt like the biggest r-word in the world. Couldn't even map some simple API arrays.
Tool Laterus just makes me woke AF.
Been coding hard today since I turned on the pc1 -
I didn't realise just how retarded people are when they call tech support.
Working combined line 1/2 tech support and people just describe shit in the most unhelpful way ever.2 -
When your legacy retarded old as fuck frameworks are slowly dying and instead of migrating to new backend framework, losing some money but improving quality of our products dipshits in charge hire vue.js developer to try to replace jquery with vue just to keep this 10 years old legacy zombie crap alive for 2 more years..
How can you be this fucking retarded greedy motherfucking morons... it shouldnt even be possible1 -
Did you ever had to integrate a fucking "API" that is done via mail bodies?
Fuck this shit! Who need responses about success or failure?! Guess this will take a long time to test this fucking piece of garbage... We don't get a test system, we need to test this with the production system of the other company. I hope their retarded application crashes when receiving malicious mails.
Not speaking about security, I bet everyone can send a mail to their stupid mail address and modify their data 🙈
And inside of this crap mail you also have to send the name, street and email of their company. Why do you fucking need this information?!1 -
Maybe you already know it and I’m just retarded.. but if not, try out kodi + Exodus add-on👌
Most comfortable streaming I’ve ever experienced.
(Here in my country streaming is completely legal so no hate please:))4 -
Biggest aha! moment was when i understood rust's borrowing and how much of a retarded piece of shit it was and then went back to scala yesterday7
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FUCK YOU MICROSOFT
GO FIX YOUR FUCKIN C# METHODS
Language felt good but jesus fuckin christ.
HOW YOUR File.Exists() can be so retarded jesus fuckin christ
I mean god, how retarded can it be when i obtain the current directory with your builtin method (System.Environment.CurrentDirectory) attach to it the directory name with the images i need and I ALWAYS GET FALSE ABOUT ITEMS THAT ARE FUCKIN THERE.
Fix your fuckin encodings too, suckers.6 -
This thesis work is legit putting me to the edge, I literally have been hating coding for the past 3 months and it used to be the #1 most beautiful thing I have ever learned to me.
Proof of how much some people can be fucking disgusting retarded assholes, existing just to steal oxygen. Fermenting my vomit is a better clean air investment than letting these monkeys live. -
Why the FUCK does this bloated Ubuntu rotten swamp corps of a former beautiful Debian always, really ALWAYS, FUCK UP distro upgrades!! Which retarded spoon shagger at Canonical came to the conclusion it were a good idea to release every 6 month, regardless of the inability to actually update this crap?!? My other systems run Arch since their first install back in 2009, still clean and up-to-date systems!!!!3
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Modern approach to displaying dates is shit
I want to see a face of a fucker who decided that "5 YEARS AGO" has more meaning than exact date "15 Sep 2019". All apps that use that fucking retarded date representation are useless shit, worst UX ever.3 -
I feel retarded. Just spent a good solid 15 minutes trying to figure out what was wrong:
<input id="#example" type="text">
let data = $('#example').val()
And I was sending data to the backend and wondering why it always came across as undefined...6 -
Starting college soon.. I'm really hoping I dont get one of those shit teachers that doesnt actually know what they're talking about..7
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to;dr: I think I'm retarded. I don't know how to networking.
got Proxmox set up on my server... sorta. I suck at networking. I bought a domain name, and I'm trying to have each container have a subdomain of the domain name I bought. each container has a unique internal IP address, but they all share the host's public IP address. so after a couple hours of googling, I THINK what I need to do is run a reverse proxy server on the public IP and route each subdomain manually to an internal IP address with something like nginx..... or am I retarded?3 -
The development life cycle when taking over a project is much like that of a slightly retarded wizards first steps into utilizing the powers of the dark forces.
CONFUSION => CLARITY => FAILURE => CONFUSION => CONFUSION => BROKEN KEYBOARD => CONFUSION => UNKNOWN MAGIC => SUCCESS => CONFUSION => BORED OF THIS IT FUCKING WORKS => PUSH => SHUTDOWN -
Partner wants to hire a freelance consultant for iOS development, (because I cant make anything out of their retarded ecosystem), on my advise.
After a year im still getting paid 0$/h, and we have to hire someone...
Is this the point where i wear a dunce hat?3 -
The entire react "return of a useEffect is its cleanup" is one of the most retarded design decisions ever. Hello, you can't have async functions. Do you want to return early and still have a cleanup? Good luck, hope you like debugging. Who the fuck came up with this idea and what was it inspired by.4
-
Really crossing my fingers at the idea of an Iphone SE2 :( i really want that to happen.
I don't really like retarded big phones and there aren't that many options in the Android area that I like.
And no, I ain't a fucking fan boy. It can be a windows phone and if i dig it i'll buy it.6 -
Numbers (from mac) sucks big fucking time!
Its like assuming your retarded, I cant save a file .whatever without it trying to insert the fucking numbers extension...
While buying excel what do you recommend?1 -
Man it is retarded how VS re-aligns your precompile statements to the BEGINNING OF THE FUCKING LINE EVERY TIME YOU ADD A NEW ONE.
Why does it do that in the first place, it looks ugly when it’s not in-line with the code, fucking stop it. -
Im bout to start my freshmen year of college and I need money right. Then it hits me. FUCK IM A PROGRAMMER I CAN JUST MAKE SOMETHING! im retarded and genius at the same time.9
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What do you mean you sent a fucking mail about it? Theres a reason we have case systems with case fucking numbers. Its so that we can keep track of different customers, which is crucial for day to day operations. You retarded fucking fuck.
-
!rant
Finally got the 1000++ still feels like I just joined last month. Thanks to you folks I don't feel like I'm alone anymore.
PS: Fuck jQuery, copypasta shit code and retarded company policies. 🕊1 -
Gonna be applying for college. Gonna major in programming.. I've always read the horror stories.. I hope my teachers arent retarded and dont make me use shit software..
Any advice?..3 -
ok
welcome to my review of windows 10 and the surface 3
windows 10 and surface tablets are utter S H I T
my mom has a surface 3 and it's the most frikin retarded piece of hardware I've ever used
the keyboard spontaneously stops working and the surface needs to be restarted to fix it
today it was spontaneously restarting for no reason
it is shit
and retarded win10 preinstalls shit like candy crush, seriously who tf wanted that
it opens frikin links in edge EVEN WHEN CHROME IS THE DEFAULT BROWSER SHIT
wtf5 -
Hey maybe a retarded question but if I buy a new motherboard, can I just plug my hard drive back in and have it run no problems?23
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When the fuck will some people here start using categories how they should be used? They post something in "rant" category, but it starts with "!rant". Seriously, what the fuck? How can people this retarded even be devs?10
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Fuck the ISP and the incompetent retarded developers in the government!
The retarded ISP is injecting malware ads on all web pages which means if you access a non HTTPS site, you're gonna get fucked.
And the retarded government site still do not have HTTPS version for the websites!
The biggest irony is that this particular government site is for developers to register for courses ( paid ) about latest technologies.1 -
I fucking hate Richard Hendricks. That long nose jack off is not qualified to lead a retarded child to the loo let alone heading a company!2
-
- Finish a few public projects.
- Finish creating my iOS development company.
- Master a few primary languages instead of having simple knowledge on a bunch.
- Resist the urge to tell my boss to fucking die. (He’s nice, but retarded.)
- Survive life
- Start selling my old projects and earning some money.
- Earn some money.
Just some of the goals I have. -
Trying to debug an app for twenty minutes, and wondering why it was crashing and not logging anything strange.
Realising only after some compulsive head scratching that logcat has been filtered the whole time -
Wpf Rant
Seems kinda retarded but it should be trivial to reference a ListBox in a SelectionChanged event doing something like SomeListBox.Items[someIndex] = new TextBox()
in order to replace a simple textblock element with a textbox element that accepts input (replace-in-place), but it's proven to be the most long, aggravating series of unnecessary convoluted bullshit I have encountered so far.
And when I do something like ((ListBox)e.Source).SelectedItem = new TextBox(), nothing break per se but I get no god damn error or feedback, as if it worked, but nothing fucking changed.
I can only assume I'm fucking retarded or like most of the shit coming out of microsoft, WPF is a broken pile of bullshit.
I'd ask on here but every time I ask technical questions I never get any fucking answers. Like a ghost town around here sometimes..11 -
Me: How to use those retarded promises in typescript
Every result on internet: 20 pages article. Let me introduce you to angular, first you install npm and node then you create a project, name it whatever you want, then we create a file.
Promises motherfucker, how those work? Can you simply write about that?1 -
most frustrating thing is team mate is a totally asshole could not get the job done, and behave like innocent little girl.
-
How hard can it fucking be to just bundle, minify and compress css and js in webpack.
FFS, am I retarded? -
yesterday wrote a huge part of logic. a colleague from other continent said there is a bug. sent me request data, server logs, but I couldn't find what's wrong yesterday.
today I arrived at work and checked it another time and it doesn't work.
"well, maybe he is not that retarded after all!"2 -
A certain person deserves nothing better than the signs of the tires of a full-speed heavy truck tatooed on her face (even though, I admit, it could be an improvement to the overall aesthetic). Especially when she wants to push the office (1 week before the vacations and with no real urgency, while there a tons of other jobs that are way more urgent) to modify one by one some field in the data of 5500 customers only because SHE (and only she) has a bonus, when everything could be solved with a fucking simple sql update and we only need a simple approval for that from the company of the project management software. All of this while she spends the time planning her own vacations in internet, or complaining about EVERYTHING, including the colour of the icons of her pdf reader (30 min complaints about a stupid icon). Responsible my ass.
-
added a sixth point to "core principles" of the os/language i'm designing:
6. hard crash on as many errors as possible because programmers are retarded pieces of shit and fuck them from both sides at once with three baseball bats in each hole at the same time. either fucking write your program right or go fucking fuck yourself you fucking lobotomized incompetent pieces of shit.
because fuck this fucking bullshit. your lobotomy will either make the whole system crash or you'll learn to not be lobotomized you fucking retarded pieces of shit.
oh, and the error message is gonna be "OH NO! THE CREATOR OF [program name] IS A RETARDED LOBOTOMIZED MORON WHO CAN'T WRITE CODE FOR SHIT, so now he fucked up your whole system by his utter incompetence... Restarting..."1 -
Styling Newsletters is like time travel..time travel in a retarded past that doesnt knew what beauty modern css is, also fuck your sincerly MS Outlook for being a propritary cunt.
display:block will not work for MS Outlook, cause, well reasons.3 -
What the fuck is the philosophy behind ionic and similar retarded frameworks?
To not to learn two or languages/ecosystems ?
You fucking deal with more in those "hybrid" shits: Ionic itself + Cordova + Angular + Android + iOS
I'd rather write the same code twice and just deal with Android + iOS
Are all other ""Hybrid"" and pseudo-native frameworks like this?22 -
Aw fuck, I'm more retarded when it comes to Linux than I anticipated.
(Arch) Linux is like a nice, big framework where everything you need for the basic setup is already there, but you end up overlooking it and implementing it yourself.
At least my hard drives are gonna be defraged -
"look! a string of words that a guy on twitter with a laser eyes profile picture posted! it must be the very factual and very true latest system prompt of GPT4!"
god, dumb fucks.
we don't even need a GPT5, AI has already won; humans are retarded4 -
5y+ exp in react.
First commit is about 5y ago.
It's for a big startup in Brazil.
Way to scare of actual decent developers.
3 -
Getting paid less than half this fucker I'm supposed to fix the code of.
Seriously, I don't know if he was (got fired) retarded or if it was the owner's fault.
Why would someone from a non tech background venture launching an app
Fuck this -
Imma kill the next person who asks if they can “help” me or if I’m alright or ok
Since they never ask it in a way which is genuine or not related to the retarded shit all around me13 -
All those stackoverflow mod cunts should be attached to a shocking device which electrocutes them each time they close or mark a question as a duplicate.
That would teach them to read and understand a question instead of skimming a couple of lines and making retarded assumptions. Fucktards.1 -
Firefox won't access iFrame's domain's Auth cookies when the iFrame is hosted on a 2nd domain, even when the cookies are Secore,SameSite=None, and sandbox is as lax as possible.
Works on chromium-based browsers.
Looked up SO and it's just "oh im facing the same" x10. FFS.
Why does Firefox behave so retarded. Not doing their shrinking userbase numbers any favour :v9 -
All of these dependency management tools supposed to make my life easier?!?! I have been looking for half an hour for how to simply downgrade a package to an older version I must be plain retarded1
-
Tryed to update bios within Windows. Let te application work for about 30 minutes. Want to cancell, click on the cancel button. Wait some minutes. Shut the PC down. Doesn't boot anymore. I'm retarded.6
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Im in the 7th episode of a tutorial on youtube about MonoGame. I still dont understand why hes doing as he is, or what its really doing.
Theres 2 possible reasons.
a. Its because i havent seen proper results and had my hands on it.
b. Im retarded1 -
Recruiter after not hearing from a company I applied two months ago: "Please accept my apology for a belated reply, I am struggling with Office 365."
Fucker - if complexity of Office caused a two month delay to answer a fucking email than you need to have your small spastic brain checked asap.
Should've just kept his mouth shut rather than to insult people by sending these kind of excuses.2 -
TELEKOM ARE YOU RETARDED? although paying for a business contract we were a whole day without internet - a technician was sent between 17:00 - 20:00 and never rang the doorbell. Also, I spent a sum of about 2 hours (!!!!!!!!) Just In the queue (¡!!¡!!!¡¡¡!!!) Of the hotline. It shouldn't be called TELEKOM - TELLEFUCKOFF would suit better! MAGENTA MY ASS SUCKERS!3
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Looks like google dumbed down the YouTube home page by making it look like some retarded mobile app. Fuck this shit I'm not using my fingers and my fingers arent so fat that I need 5 cm large thumbnail ffs.3
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FFS Kotlin, did you completely forget to mention how to create an object in js or did you seriously not think about the usage of the `new` operator when writing that compiler.
I just wanted to use that glorious when statement for my discord bot. Not to mention that retarded tutorial with incredible gaps and cyclic references and now this. -
Someone by mistake deactivated my company account. I don't have access to any company services including help desk. Probably it will take 2-3 days to activate it again due to some retarded policies only to deactivate it again next Friday, because this will be the last day in that shit hole.2
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1 of the many windows rants i will make since i have to use that on work's laptop.
Let's start.
20GB for an IDE? what a joke.
Seriously MS. Are you fucking retarded? You have a fuckin retarded windows store, and i need to open it 3 times for it to be functional? Fuck you.
I want to change the default browser. YES I FUCKIN WANT TO CHANGE IT, STOP FUCKIN ASKING ME 500 TIMES IF I'M SURE ABOUT IT AND DO THE THING I TOLD YOU TO DO. Fuck you.
2GB on startup? Thanks, appreciated. Miss my 250MB on my linux laptop. FUCK YOU.
Did i fuckin tell you i want to sync the onedrive? I clicked that shit to disable it and you decided to sync the fuck out of it? Fuck you.
Candy crash and other retarded games? LOL, can't say anything. The laptop is from the job, i won't bother uninstalling that shit. In any case MS would reinstall them again. Fuck you.
Fans at 100% for no reason and battery draining like it's a cold drink that drinks someone who is thirsty? Thanks MS, very helpful. Fuck you.
Powershell? Well i leave that. Whenever i remember how slow it is i want to throw the laptop of the window. Fuck you.
Notifications? Thanks, it's very good thing to spam them for no fucking reason. Fuck you.
Skype? Who the fuck told you to install it? Fuck you.
Well i won't say anything about their fuckin updates. Every one knows how retarded and piece of shit they are.3 -
wow Xfinity just wow.... how retarded can you be... I ordered the "self install kit" which the person on the phone said included a modem, a router, and the cables to hook everything up... the package came, and it's just the cables. no modem. no router. just wow.
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Had to add some affiliate JS with a fallback pixel. Put it between noscript tags since thats what the fallback is meant for.
Affiliate Guy: did you implement the fallback?
Me: Did you turn of javascript?
AG: I've just talked to our developers, they say we can't turn of javascript or something
Me: <headdesk>
Are these people retarded -
I created pull requests for some open source js projects to fix issues with monkey patching Object.Prototype, as I used it heavily in a current project. All of them were accepted and merged.
A couple of weeks later I realised how retarded that was and refactored all monkey patching to separate modules. -
apple you mongoloids, default background of images should be transparent not white
im too retarded to figure out how to be able to view these fuckign white images (svg file extensions to be specific) ive been given because the fucking default background is white and im too retarded to find a way around it quickly (still working)
fuck you
"IT juSt WerkZ!!!!1111" - steve jobs dying of an easily prevented early caught cancer or some shit because he doesn't want the minimally invasive surgery that would fix him, but would rather juice cleanse (idk if true, only vaguely remember memes)2 -
My life changed when I started typing parentheses and curly brackets using both hands.
Left hand for shift and right hand for the actual symbol.
No more wrist pain and it's 100 times faster.
It took me 25 years to make this amazing discovery, why the fuck am I so retarded3 -
Have you ever loved someone so badly that you cant forget about it even though she/he is retarded AF also no time to cringe anymore because you gotta complete this project at work before end of this weekend?2
-
The worst part is: this commit message would cost me my job, but whoever created this retarded mess of multiple responses is untouchable.
5 -
Sf bulk api:
CurrentPollingInterval = 1000;
While(jobRunning) {
...
CurrentPollingInterval = Math.Max(16000, CurrentPollingInterval *= 2);
}
Max/Min...
Why does this take so long..
I am fucking retarded...1 -
Sooo, I'm having a lecture now on JML (Java Markup Language), but it seems so retarded. Is this actually used anywhere? And if so, why?
-
i had to throw together a tool to periodically test a friend's network (plus on-demand if needed) as it keeps slowing to a crawl for no reason, i called it "netpoke" and it's retarded and i despise tkinter with all my heart but i needed non-blocking and timers and shit...
i'll prolly never release it as it's mostly heavily-modded copypaste SO garbage but y'know -
Android studio is BIG PILE OF GARBAGE.
I waste my second day to install a fuckin emulator because that retarded thing tries to unzip it in fuckin /tmp, which it cant because it gets filled and then it fails.
It doesnt even consider my overwrite options to use a different /tmp directory
AH
FUCK
YOU -
Some iOS APIs are just retarded.
Apple's retarded double negative:
myUIButton.isHidden = fasle
How about just:
myUIButton.isShown = true4 -
I hate that I'm having a SHITLOAD of work to do but apparently I need to work with data entry because the clients are too retarded to use a motherfucking CMS. JUST TYPE THOSE CHANGES INTO THE BOX YOURSELF, NO NEED TO INVOLVE 3 PEOPLE, YOU JUST NEED TO TYPE THAT BULLSHIT, THE BOX IS RIGHT THERE, NICE AND RECTANGLE, YOU'VE BEEN USING IT BEFORE HOLY FUCK2
-
What free web hosting to never use
000webhost (annoying watermark, main site takes 1 to 2 minutes to load)
InfinityFree (retarded staff, slow asf)
AwardSpace (only 1 gb of space)
What to use: ct8.pl (polish and 5000 user limit, supports .exe files)2 -
fuck this shit.
fuck the pile of arcane shit that is ARCore.
fuck the fucking pile of overcomplicated shit that is mapbox.
fuck the idiotic frankensteiny steaming pile of shit that is "arcore+mapbox lifesized maps unity project" or how is it called.
fuck this retarded scammy culture when a company is doing meetups with investors before even having a working prototype.
fuck this stupid fucking culture where there's no time for some actual, sensible, creative work, just grab these two repos from github and ducktape them together and we'll call that our demo which we will present to inverstors.
fuck every fucking molecule of this fucking world.
i just wanted to be creative. to CREATE stuff. CREATE, not pile up dumb half-baked nonprojects made by someone else on top of each other until the smell is too strong for anyone to see if it's actually reasonable or not.
i wanted to create stuff. make games. design and make them. actual interesting ones which have actual value (because fuck the retarded gaming industry who's imagination doesn't go beyond "u a dude who does pew pew to other dudes", but that's a different rant).
fuck this disgusting, retarded, idiotic, boring, lonely, cold, lobotomizedly stupid world where the only way to succeed is a shitty pile of shit scammy scum.
fuck me for not being able to learn how to be scammy scum, so I could be successful too. -
The fuck is this shit. Retarded play store can't even notice an active internet connection.
BTW that warning is thrown everytime I open it.
1 -
Anyone have the link to that rant where the individual is yelling about how maximum password lengths are retarded? I just really need to read that right now... the max password length on this site is 14 CAHRACTERS7
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Well fuck me, one week of sewrching for a bug, just to find oit that the search endpoint shits itself, when it sees an underscore in the query because fuck you. Local test system is not as retarded, so I never found out, until today
-
Explain to me like I'm retarded why underscores are not desirable in a java class names besides, it's not the common convention.
Context:
FooBarLongClassName_OtherClassNameVisitor for a visitor class. This is the name of a class11 -
If I was living in the States, I have feeling that I'd become good friends with the Indians there.
But their accent still staying despite their long stay in the US is kind of retarded.3 -
You know all those years ago
I saw some guys being handed COVID-19 masks in a lockdown facility
But no one outside was wearing them
I sometimes wonder
How stupid people must have felt when they realized it wasn't real
Footage from Chile in 2021 shows their military wearing those retarded masks4 -
Can traefik's documentation and configuration be any more confusing and retarded? I hate this thing. Any good alternatives?1
-
Massive problem of bizarre disconnected and self aggrandizing or perhaps diminishing bias interpretation wherein history is interpreted not based on history but a strange warped and often retarded manner to mean something completely different.
How do the Borg live and breathe at all without being magically cracktarded every moment of everyday and wandering around like the robot from the dark to tower or a rabid raccoon ?
-
tmw you reach page 20 on Google just to find out how to make a fucking tar without this stupid "./" appended to the front of every file (and without that retarded empty dir that's literally just called ".")
-
1. The fucking wifi is retarded at work, it works for 2 minutes then drops connection for 2...
2. The building is also a fucking bunker so 4g signal is pretty much nonexistent
3. Spotify won't let me view my "offline" saved albums unless I go totally "offline" within the app WTF
LET ME LISTEN TO MY FUCKING MUSIC FOR FUCK SAKE6 -
So.
They mill round
Zimmerman states something as an interpretation
This infuriates someone further
Are they totally fucking retarded or just that clueless?
I remember many times that they got their come uppance no pun intended at all. -
everything is shit and getting worse. everyone is retarded and getting worse. (including me of course)
no reason to be trying.
peace in my soul.
finally.3 -
*Ctrl + a*
*retarded auto-indent code shortcut key*
*Presses arrow key instinctively*
*moves cursor to end or start of code*
Am I the only one?
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