*code doesn't work*

-Run three times, just to be sure
-Its NOT the code, must be the project. Full rebuild.
-Run a few more times after rebuild didn't fix it.
-Google the issue.
-Stackoverflow must be wrong. The code is JUST like their solution.
-Run a few more times, but with your lucky underpants
-Reboot. Must be an operating system thing.
-Tea break. Give the issue time and it will fix itself.
-Run a few more times. Still unfixed
-Contact customer support.
-Walmart said they can't help.
-Consider writing your own language without this OBVIOUS flaw
-Kickstarter for c++++
-Raise $50,000
-Start a family
-Contact customer support again
-Run a few more times
-Now banned from Walmart
-Oh shit, missing a semicolon

Sometimes you run your code,
it doesn't work, so you run it again,
it works

Sometimes you open your fridge,
no food inside, so you close and open it again,
still no food inside

What the fuck student. Why in fuck would you submit a python assignment in word. So that all the formatting you know the stuff that tells python how to run the code all fucks up. How the fuck can I mark this.

Schrödinger's code:

Its both working and crashing until you run it.

PHP 🐘 is so damn easy to learn, run straighforward in all OSs, that anyone can start coding in no time. Therefore, the amount of crap code around, made by unskilled devs, is just *unbelievable*. 💩

When you run but the code doesn’t

Me to IT team: I need a more powerful machine to run my optimization code on.

IT: Okay take this - 64 gigs + i7HQ

Me after an hour:

Just reduced 900 lines of horrible code into 106 lines of less horrible code..

QA: do those 106loc really do what the 900loc did ?
Me: yes
QA: really?
Me: yes
QA: are you sure?
Me: NO. I was lying. Maybe it does. Maybe it doesn't. Maybe you should run it and find out.
QA: *immediately releases for prod*

Debuging 101

1 You open the project.
2 Run the app and replicate the bug.
3 Stop the app.
4 Stare at your code for like 15 mins and change nothing.

5 you re-run the app and hopes that it would fix on its own even if you didnt do anything.

When your code doesn't compile in one go but compiles on second run 😂😂😂😂😂

When you are debugging code at work and run into things like this...

>me on stackoverflow
>a nice question
>i provide a 3 line code with explanation
>comment: 'doesnt work, throws exception'
>i run the code and provide a screenshot that it works
>'doesnt work for me'
>19 line code gets accepted

10/10, would answer again

Fuckin hell!!

Code works everywhere except at one client. Ok, I check logs & see something missing.. I go check the code that handles excel files.. try catch and do nothing.. great.. :/ ok let's log this shit to see what is not ok...
Insert logs, build, update, run.. now it freakin works o.O

"Just about every aspect of your every day life is run by or depends on millions of lines of code.. have you hugged a programmer today?"

Finally finished my AMD Watercooled build 🤤
Now my code can run cooler 😂

CPU - Ryzen 3900X - stock

RAM - Corsair Vengeance 32 GB 3600 Mhz

Mobo - Asus ROG Crosshair Formula VIII

GPU - MSI GTX 1080ti 11GB GDDR5

!rant

My girlfriend sat on my lap the other day when I was helping a friend of mine with some assembly code. She look at the code an said

What are you doing?

I explained the code and said that is the lowest you can get before machine code. She didn't run away in fear....

This is a great sign...

My code works in first run , but why ? -_-

I wanted to rant about some code that should run smoothly but somehow doesn't run at all, then I realised I don't know enough English swear words to express my anger and frustration.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

if code==bugs:
run(spotify)

A rooted Galaxy S1 with Android 6, if my code runs on it then it will run on anything.

I’m happiest about code I deleted.

Deleted code is easy to maintain, easy to read and it makes applications run faster.
Moreover applications take less disk space and are faster to download.

The more happy than about deleted code I’m about deleted software or destroyed computers.

Remember guys, when naming your firstborn child you can cause a stack overflow in the system’s memory by naming it %5E2019F% allowing you to sideload unsigned external code and run DOOM

When a programming teacher gets you to write out code by hand and then says "pretend to run it"

I code, drink, and from Java (yes it's an actual place). Except my life doesn't run on JVM. Or does it?

0. Problem
1. Thinking of an algo
2. Writing a code
3. Compile
4. Compile Error
5. Fixing bugs
...
6. Finally compiled!!
7. Running a test
8. Run time error
9. Fixing bugs
...
10. Finally I can see the result !!!!
11. Shit!

12. LOGICAL ERROR :/

166 lines of if else hell just to decide between prod and sandbox.

Run the same query multiple times to get the same data.

And that's all written by our code review team lead.

What a mess.

In web technologies lab.

Friend copied some php code from some website and saved it.
Tries to run it and it just prints whatever he wrote.
After thinking for like half an hour he calls me.

Friend: hey u know php right? Why my code is not running?

I check the code in the editor and everything looks fine except he saved his php code with an extension .txt 😑 😑

It does run...

Developing a Haskell project, indenting everything with 3 spaces. Develop to over a million lines of code. Use Darcs as a repository. Run the code on AIX powerpc architecture. Suffering from special snowflake syndrome.

Boss:"Build templates that convert our 1000+ pages built for desktop, into responsive ones that work on large screen and phones. "

Finished...Run the company's code scanner and it reports violations of development rules (which was expected)

I go to request exemptions....

"Oh, no you can't use JavaScript or CSS that uses position."

April fools day prank idea:

1. Replace all semicolons with Greek question marks
2. Add a Gradle task that automatically fixes the semicolons, but only when run on the build servers
3. Watch as people get confused because the code builds in the server but not locally

!rant
tfw you run a linter on your code and it finds zero issues

You know that feeling, when you code, compile, run. It just works ?

That’s the moment I get insecure

// I wanna know the number of Active Devrant users out of curiosity, please run the code below.

if ( you are dfox || trogus ){

comment( no_of_Active_Users );

} else {

upvote++;

}

tfw you compile another time cause even though the code doesn't run, you're sure you made no mistakes

that moment when u run the code and it works, and then u run the very same code again and it fails.

Hmm our bundle js is already 1.35Mb maybe I should do something with that.

... Insert 2 hours of frantic webpack magic + babel-preset tweeking, tree-shake code optimization ...

- npm run build
- bundle.js => 1.37Mb

Great Success! I'm going to take a lunch...

What if, the whole world was programmed an run out of code?🌍🌎🌏
~ My brain in the morning

Anyone else find the eat sleep code hacker / soylent chugging caffeine energized all nighter coder beast idea immature? I run into people who think that those ideals are what makes a good engineer and it irks me. Maybe I'm just too judging.

Python Dev Learning C#: I'll just wait until I run the program to see what type the function returns.
Me: Static typing means you know that before the code even compiles!
Python Dev: Sometimes I forget that all functions explicitly say what they can return.

Visual studio 2017 with Xamarin:

* writing some sweet code, life is good.. build and run.
*change int age to 2, build, build failed, no single message why.
*clean, clean failed, no single message why.
* build rebuild clean all or by project, nothing works, no single message why.
*change nothing, restart VS, build success !
* writing some code, same problem
*restart VS, "this project is not compatible with Visual Studio"

Good bye guys, I'm gonna kill myself

Let me paint you a picture.

It's the day after code freeze. Code has been branched. It's time once again to verify tickets and run smoke check so we can begin our 3 days of blitz testing before we deploy.

As a team we all have roles to play in this process. Yet, every stinking release it is like pulling teeth to get everyone to take the initiative and verify tickets and run smoke check. Our principled engineer even reached his limit this morning and blew up on everyone.

When you are being paid good money to do a job, you need be an adult, be responsible, step up and do your job!

Pings google, no losses in 1 hour!
And just as I run that JavaScript code on Node.js, the internet stops! Every fricking time!
-_-'
>_<

If ever your code breaks, just utter these words and it will magically fix itself:

"Wtf. Hey [coworker name], Can you sanity check this code? I don't know why this segfaults! It looks fine but you just run it and it bre- oh wait... I swear it didn't work a minute ago."

*me teaching someone to code*

Me: So what do you think will happen when we run this?
Student: ummm... I don...🤔
Random: I KNOW! It does xyz 😄
Student: agh yea, it does xyz 😅
Me: (ffs) 😐

Nothing gets learned in the end 😮

When your code doesn't run even after working for hours.

As an Indian girl, there are more chances of my family finding me a suitable groom than my code having its first run error free.
FML.

Oh look MS-DOS on GitHub?!

Time to run through more code I don't understand and see what I can learn and potentially port :-D

I am extremely particular about writing good READMEs in my repositories. I make sure that it has everything from prerequisites to run the code and tests on a new machine to how to actually run it (and the tests) and everything in between.

Despite all that I was asked questions that should have been avoided if you had seen the README.

One of these times was by a junior DevOps asking me about an error which was clearly due to him running the code without a virtual environment. Pings me with the entire stacktrace, I go to his desk and tell him to install the environment, which he does. 3 minutes later, another error message.

He was running the wrong script. I go to his desk again. Open the repository. Show him the README. Show him the section titled "To run the pipeline"!

There's a reason they're called README. You're supposed to READ them! 😑

When I run the code for the first time without bugs

Rant::aboutMyself(my_code){
Wrote 500+ lines of code without proper documentation. Got 200 little bugs. Got frustrated. Gave up on code. Started documenting it. Step by step. Resolved many silly mistake while documenting the code. Completed documentation. Run the program . Bugs reduced to 10. I'm sooo happy. I LOVE DOCUMENTATION 😍
}

When your sysadmins can't script a file compare and so you do the code for them.
"Sorry but we can't run unknown code on the server"
Read the code then you vile troglodytes!

Anyone hear about the emergency patch that Microsoft just released? Its a RCE vulnerability CVE-2017-11937 which ironically targets all of Microsoft's security products.

Basically when Windows defender scans a specially crafted file the attacker can run code as the LocalSystem. Nice one Microsoft!

In order for the program to run smoothly, it is often necessary to add some comments to the code comments...

/***
* ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░▄░░
* ░░░░░░░░░▐█░░░░░░░░░▄▀▒▌░
* ░░░░░░░░▐▀▒█░░░░░░▄▀▒▒▒▐
* ░░░░░░░▐▄▀▒▒▀▀▀▄▄▀▒▒▒▒▒▐
* ░░░░░▄▄▀▒░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒█▒▒▄█▒▐
* ░░░▄▀▒▒▒░░░▒▒▒░░▒▒▀██▀▒▌
* ░░▐▒▒▒▄▄▒▒▒▒░░░▒▒▒▒▒▀▄▒▒
* ░░▌░░▌█▀▒▒▒▒▒▄▀█▄▒▒▒▒█▒▐
* ░▐░░░▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▌██▀▒▒░▒▒▀▄
* ░▌░▒▄██▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░░░▒▒▒▒
* ▀▒▀▐▄█▄█▌▄░▀▒▒░░░░░░▒▒▒
*/

When you run into a supposedly deterministic piece of code that behaves differently each time you run it for God knows what reason

When you code berserk style for an hour, and the first test run just works perfectly!

I hate it when people start giving me condolences when my code doesn't run. What are you? A console?

Me: 'alriiight let's run this code here'

Logs: 'lol the function you did is deprecated. how about you don't do that, and do the right thing instead'

What was the right thing?
I don't know. It's not on their documentation in their site.

Thanks, js devs :) you guys are the absolute best

I just fixed my first code issue in my first IT job ever! Holy fucking shit I'm almost senior software engineer by now!

That magic joy of knowing that my instructions will run on someone else's computer is just mind-blowing.

Using an array of function pointers to replace large switch statements... holy shit.. I feel like Thanos getting the time stone.
Just when you think you can’t get your code to run any faster, nor did I think I could get the code any smaller... BOOM.. C never ceases to impress.

Next I’ll be turning this into “object” oriented ... but since it’s C ... it will just be Struct oriented .. SOP ..

#inlcude<header>

^this typo is the reason why i broke a keyboard, almost smashed the school lab monitor and embarrassed the teacher who also wasn't able to run the code either.

Pushed code remotely and told a teammate to run it on the target hardware. He then told me he might of blown up $6000 worth of equipment. Then he says "Never mind everything works."

World record for biggest heart attack?

"Don't call it Application, call it Website. If you Code produces an executable that the user can run then call it Application". Fcking WEBDESIGNERS

The RGB makes the code run faster

Just rememberes a collegue i had for a short period, i was remote and he was on location randomly added, I was told he was a php developer.
What he did was delete ALL the whitespace in the php code and called it optimising, he told the director it’ll make the code run faster. You can imagine how fun that was...

I have been telling my dietitian's advice to my code.
Run daily.
None of us really care to listen though. 😄

Sometimes I wish I could run code outside computers/servers/microchips. Then I could build another world.

Not ONLY does the new code a coworker wrote straight up not work (and they somehow managed to merge it to master) but it also broke an entirely unrelated endpoint due to an abstraction they tried to make. Very clear they didn't even run their code at all.

So i helped my friend write a program and i sent it to him. The next day he told me that the code dosent run, so i asked him to show me the errors and apparently he thought C and C++ is the same thing and was trying to run my C code as C++ code...

Anyone ever run across some code that was so succinct and elegant, that you couldn't imagine ever doing something like that and start to feel bad?

<Look up who committed it>

Oh, well, damn... I used to be so good at this coding thing.

While building a Java net sniffer app, I finally write the code to run a Linux binary in a separate process after three days. It works perfectly!

Then I export my app to a runnable jar file.

About nine exceptions are thrown, including a security exception. So much for being done. 😐

#FuckPHPInTheAss

>Start working on PHP after ages.
>Found that mail() is deprecated through server support
>they suggest to use PEAR Mail
>Suggest to use deprecated PEAR code
>Fix deprecated code and magically runs on localhost
>ohmygodyess.php
>try to run on server
>fuckMyLife.exe
>Try using PHPMailer
>WTF is this How the fuck this works?
>Spends hours to understand with example code
>WorksFinOnLocal.exe
>NopeIWon'tRunOnServe.lulz
>about to use YiiMailer.

#Sleepless

When your code works from the first time

the first code on every samsung app
if(enoughSpace())
run()
else
annoyUserWith(new Popup())
closeApp()

Junior dev: Can I run lint on your codebase
Senior dev: hmmm
Jdev: Its a very nice code inspection tool
Sdev: Go ahead
Jdev: wow 50 errors
Sdev:

I wish the Congress would run all legislation by a team of programmers. Regardless of political leanings one thing is indisputable: We are very keen when it comes to finding bugs in a piece of code -- especially if we didn't write said code!
After all: What is the law if not code for people instead of processors?

I’m slowly starting to run most of my daily operations & programming in Visual Studio Code.

Here’s an example of me working in markdown files for one of my GitHub projects...directly in VS Code with live preview 👏.

What a difference three lines of code can make. That's the typical case of "that seemed to be a good idea". I don't know how did I think it would work out on the long run. Next step will be reduceing the enourmous CPU usage as well.

During a code review I was told that
if(x and y){
if(z){}
}

Will be slower to run than
if(x and y and z){}

I mean if you want to talk about programming practices and uniform code yes absolutely but any compiler will treat these identically, not to mention the assembly being identical. She was a superior though so I just went along with it.

So I finally get code in Xcode able to compile and run after crashing in main()... due to obscure settings in it's build it does not like. Took hours of hunting around, googling, and used up all my craps table luck for the month.

Now, out of the blue, after a good 30 test run, edit, compile, run cycles... BOOM, the god damn thing starts crashing at before main() again. No friggin idea why.

Xcode says SIGABRT to me... yea well I got something for you Apple Xcode... 🖕🏼

So a friend of mine is starting to learn PHP and HTML and he tells me:
"I wrote some code in HTML but I can't run it through the browser"

I'm not brave enough to tell him you can't "run" HTML

But later, he told me "so now i'm writing PHP just to understand how it works, but don't want to install the program to run PHP"

How the fuck you gonna learn?

I already know I'm gonna have to build what he wants to do :/ at least a couple thousand euros incoming :D

One of my colleges complained that the remote vm he uses to test his Java-Code is so slow that he thinks it's actually just a potatoe.
I said to him... Well you know... 3 Billion Devices run Java.

Have anyone felt this before?

You Google loads of different tutorial on something, find one most recent tutorial... Do it and when compile, a lot of error pops out. Go to the github code page and realise the author did not include the line that was required to run smoothly in the tutorial page/video?

The feel you get when u r listening to Interstellar docking scene soundtrack while writing a code and it compiles and run with no errors exactly the moment docking happens ! #goosebumps

i like to write schrödinger's code.

as in, if i write code and never run it, it is both functional and nonfunctional.

No wonder my Python code was broken. I called the super function of the wrong ancestor 🙄 Lesson learned: run the tests after every functional change, no matter how trivial it might seem.

Boss: Where should i put this piece of code so the android app will work correctly?
Me: Maybe here and we run some tests.
Boss: What? You built the app so you have to know where I should write the code for the endpoint and your app will work. No time for tests. And no update.

Fuck you boss.

Why would I use vim if my computer is powerful enough to run Visual Studio Code?

Don't run code you found on a shady forum on production.

Hours lost.

Visual Studio test adapter was failing out during the discover phase of the tests with a stack overflow exception, but that's all the information it gave me. The tests simply would not run.

Hunting through the code line by line, I eventually find this.

WHY IS THIS ALLOWED TO COMPILE

There is this general idea that people have that when programmers are able to run their code in their first attempt, without any error, they think of ourselves as geniuses. But i think that is the case only when you are starting to code. If a programmer with enough experience runs his/her code in their first attempt without any issues, he/she just says their thanks and moves on, because they know that the code can sense cockiness and if they get too carried away now they'll have to pay the price in future.

When a front end dev asks why this if statement always runs:

if (somevar != 'string1' OR somevar != 'string2') {
// code always being run
}

Java teacher writes code on blackboard in comp lab

He tells us to try it out at our workstations.

We do. The code does work. We tell him.

He says: "There is something wrong with your compiler..."

Question is...we were around 30 students. Can all our compilers not work if we had used the lab before and the code we run worked clean??!?!?!?

We were flabbergasted

My code works at first run.
This can't be right.
Something must have gone terribly wrong.
I don't trust you computer!

When your code doesn't run so you run it again hoping it magically fixed itself.

!Rant

I have not slept in 28 hours.

I discovered Quantum computing, pubo and simulators.

I FEEL it can solve my business problem, but it is fucking time consuming to write this code. (In a good way).

I do not need sleep at this point, I need answers!

Anyone with good links to either pubo examples or a useful quantum algorithm, I’ll take it ! (not the random number… I have already run that on a real QPU 9Still no idea how much that run cost in $)!)

The moment when you edit your code and run it but nothing changes and you try looking for the mistake in yor code but the only mistake is that you forgot to compile it first...

They say: Luck is when you have somebody you love next to you.

I say: Luck is when I run code and no errors pop up...

When you want to run your cpp code for your customer

PM asked me to make the code deeper, here's the new load script:

//Someone is born (init script and load deps, also run it)
$life = new begin_life();
//magic happens (generate random token)
$life->Living = openssl_random_pseudo_bytes(rand(), TRUE);
//We end it all
$life->die();

make code change

stop server

try to re run server

dependency problems

java, tomcat, gradle , eclipse, just kill me, dont torture me like this

I want to lose some weight and tone some dormant muscles. So I decided that I'll do some pushups and crunches every time I run into a bug with which I'm struggling. Seeing as I write more bugs than stable code, I should be ripped in no time.

EsLint => 3n errors in you code.
Program failed to run

Removed ESLint

And application ran forever

EsLint is like that mother that warns her daughter time to time. Dont sit like this. Dont play with your hair. Dont whistle

Trying to get an app written on my home pc running on a different one... Without the source code...

Fixed a config issue but then run into a hard coded path I forgot to put into the configs...

Stereotypical Indonesian CS Lecturers :

"This is the code *showing slides containing a Java code*, write it on your IDE and run it"

*waiting for explanation*
"Good, blablabla *doesn't explain a single line of code, and keep reading the slides* understand?"

Fucking cunt! I fuckinf mad because not everybody as lucky as me being a self-thought dev, or atleast you can't expect everybody as smart as you!

Writing x86 assembly code in VS Code feels so weird. I mean, I'm using something that's built using crazily high level languages (JS, HTML, CSS), on top of a mammoth runtime environment (Node, V8), which is itself sitting on a modern and sophisticated operating system (Antergos), and I'm writing code that shifts bits and bytes around in memory in order to get one part of my C program to run just a little faster. Wow.

Scenario A:
Your code is working. You run again, now it's not working.

Scenario B:
Works on production. Next day it doesn't.

It is nothing you just experienced alternate universe. You probably with your manager temporarily jumped into another timeline where your code is not working.

Next time it happens tell your manager it's not your fault.

Eureka!

I had a long dream about code .. I woke up serval times and still continued the same dream and continued coding didn’t and I didn’t finish it when I finally woke up.

I don’t know what the code does, and I never run it in the dream!!

Happy Monday I guess

when you're sure something you've just changed should have fixed the issue, you run the code and the issue is still there, after half an hour debugging you realize you didn't "save" the file

Finally a weekly rant where I can learn something!! 🙌

Mine:
-put linux on machine
-buy a gallon of coke
-run the ide
-start skype
-skype with my bud and code

And the thing that makes me The most productive: deadlines

code not working?
comment code and try to run
uncomment piece by piece
code back to original
running...

apparently, the code didn't know it was right

One of my favourites :-)

C code.
C code run.
Run, code, run.

I was telling someone who never indents any of his code to indent it properly.. He was like "Why should I do that? Will it make my code run faster?"

// This part of the code should never run

Came across that lovely comment when fixing a reported bug. Guess where the bug was? You guessed it XD

When you decide it's not worth of your time to go through lengthy code documentation and just run that stackoverflow snippet straight on production.. 🤠

Started a new Factorio run.

Started implementing logic gates in it.

Started to think if I was half as OCD and productive in my code, I'd be an awesome developer.

Started to cry.

(for those of you who never heard of it, Factorio is the best building sim game ever)

tbh my high school curriculum revolves around the fact that my compsci class is run by code.org
i fucking hate those videos and drag and drop blocks to learn how to code
in 10years when im (hoping to be ) a software engineer, will the company have drag and drop? no. they will have keyboards and a screen. teach me how to fucking type code and not blocks please...
code.org has tainted this world just like how puberty tainted my dick recently...
teach me how to code, dont teach me how to drag and drop..

The reason why I like to code alone in the dark is so that people cannot see my dumb mistakes such as 'forgetting to hit run after compile and wasting 10 min wondering why my code didn't show on the console'.

: /

To peoples asking on StackOverflow or making an issue on Github:

Please, include enough code to reproduce your issue.
But don't put your entire project either

It should be as easy as possible to run and read your code.
Otherwise, peoples trying to help will get lost and give up

Writing my code, go to run it and boom its not working. I pull up stack over flow to get some insight. At this point i was working on my code for countless hours and became a bit annoyed so i decided to copy what someone wrote on stack over flow delete my code where i thought it was flawed. I run it and Blam bugged the hell outa my code. So i undo go back to my original. Turn to a friend and ask what do you thinks going wrong. He resets my browser and there it goes it works. I just kind of gave him a blank stare and thought to myself Im a dumbass!

I hate my current work with this piece of bad written legacy $hit. As 2 year old 'junior' without any code review and mentor I feel depressed. I should improve my skills at home and run away from it.

F#$ck you, corpo.

Codecrastination - when the code doesn’t want to run.

Everytime I run my code and it works. It's the little things in life lol

i transferred shitload of code from one class to another, stackoverflowed something and copy pasted it because i have never seen that this needs to be written like that, hit run compile, open up my logs expecting a mass crash and possibly explosion. it worked on the first try

Not writing tests for your code is like leaving it unguided in the hands of future Devs who gonna just change something and break the core logic and there won't be any regression test to run and check the integrity.

1. Registering in Stack Overflow
2. Registering in DevRant
3. Thinking my code will run without problem

Code doesn't work?
Better change nothing and run it again.

Nothing but love for my coworker;
but my coworker (who's a fellow programmer for at least 3 years) thought the `continue` statement in a `foreach` literally meant to keep going with the code.

He was confused his code after the continue didn't run. xD

Typescript: All of your javascript code is valid typescript
Installs Typescript
runs typescript
Typescript: line x in function y has an error
Checking the function for error and the code is fine
After wasting an hour comment out all the linez in function y
Run typescript
Typescript: you have an error on line x which is commented in function y

ERROR IN A COMMENTED LINE :(

TFW you add a substantial portion of code, without testing every little step, then you run it and everything works.

Wish I could experience it one day.

Textbook definition of insanity is debugging in Spyder

While True:
Do:
#Comment out code
Run
If not BUG:
Comment back in
Else:
Print('Congratulations. You found it. Just kidding. It's not THIS line. It's just the combination of lines')

Does anyone have a suggestion for a good python debugger that allows jumping to statements, etc.?

Given how precise developers have to be with their code to get it to run, you'd think they'd be better spellers when they write blog posts. 🤔

Let me share a million dollar worth of advice with y'all

RGB makes your code run faster and gets rid of errors. If it doesn't work, you're not using enough RGB.

ColdFusion and all ColdFusion devs should be executed. Its a god-awful software from the 90's and if you still use it you're either braindead or ignorant.

Shut up about legacy CF code too! No one cares whether or not your embeddable calendar would be hard to make in JS; fucking figure it out.

I realise that CF may make things easier in the short run, but in the long run you'll have introduced so much technical debt that you'll run crying back to JS anyways; CF is so hard to refactor and even to make flexible that you would spend less total time over an application lifecycle learning JS.

I wish there was some kind of code you could run in your brain and make the flu go away 😫 cannot remember the last time I was so unproductive for TWO WEEKS

Spend nearly a full eight-hour day working on a piece of code that, while not at all trivial, would have taken probably two hours start to finish if not for the constant stream of interruptions bombarding me...

...but then, 10 minutes before quitting time, build and run it for the first time...

...AND IT FREAKING WORKS!

I'm never more scared than when ~1000 lines of code works the very first time it's run. Makes me want to check if I've signed any documents presented as a "deal" by a guy with a fiddle in a southern state :)

quotes of best times

"You would never have a bug if you don't write a code"

"Your code could never crash if you don't run it"

"Your program can never fail if you don't test it"

"Your startup could never be unsuccessful if you don't deploy"

...when you are scared to run the code!

The code will not:
* bad-mouth
* lie
* let down
* abuse
* cheat
* bully
* kill
* run away

The code brings people together no matter if someone has the brain power of protozoa or is the next Euclid. The code is pure with a passive buff to become as perfect as possible. It's the new math for the future world. The code is love, the code is life.

That's why I love (to) code. And you?

Einstein: Insanity is doing the same thing again and again and expecting different results.

Me [After my code fails to compile]: Let me change nothing and run it again.

Just make a program that spits out random strings, run it as code and see if it compiles. If not, repeat. That way, just like the apes typewriter thing, you find the most amazing code that is so complicated, nobody would have thought of, but it solves all of humanities problems, especially the power problem you created by running this code 1000000000000000000000 times parallel.

Windows Update error code 0x800f0922 indicates that it's run out of space on the System Reserved partition.

Partition is safely expandable if the start sector stays the same on MBR drives or at any position on EFI/GPT setups.

that was fun to figure out, only took like 3 hours to do

How long do you think code reviews should be? Ours can run from anywhere between 10 minutes to 4 hours

I fucking hate webpack and frontend development so fucking much, why do I have to see my site not loading the bundled JS code on production but being absolutely fine in dev? is like watching my mom being run by a car over and over and over while I try to remember how it all was before she gets run over, FUCKING STOP WEBPACK, I havent sleep but just 4 hours since yesterday, I NEED YOU TO WORK JUST AS YOU DID IN DEV WITHOUT THE PERKS OF HMR FFS, JUST FUCKING DO IT

Every Node.js dev today - Deno is awesome! Much better than Node. Let's use Deno.

Still every Node.js dev - Why can't Deno run my simple code? Why can't they make Deno work exactly like Node?

How greedy can you get?

> boss takes half assed gdpr project : branch xyz
> branch xyz requires deprecated version of npm/node
> I re-install node this time with deprecated version
> Wow this node is configured with ant build
> ECMA 5, config but code is shit as fuck
> still I get the job done , cannot test it because code is shit as fuck and I will never any thing to fix that un healthy code
> code doesn't run on client side,
> no shit Sherlock
> get a call from boss, it urget look in it and fix it

Fuck off OneDriveSetup.exe, nobody asked you to install anything. This "i7" is only dual-core, and I need both of them to run my code, kthx.

Write code. Write tests. Everything passes and you go home happy. Come to work next morning, run tests again just to be sure. Everything fails.

I just realized something. So my company's whole release process and code management now run on mainstream tech products: Atlassian, Jetbrains, IBM and not in house/vendor crap

This is really annoying. My single manual test takes 10 minutes to run. Can't blame the task because its big, can't blame me, code optimization is not necessary and won't speed anything up. So here writing a rant waiting for it to finish

The problem: callback hell. Code would be indented by three hundred fucking spaces just to do some async work. Your code would end with thirty lines of closing curly brackets

Solution: async and await.

The problem, reborn: NoSQL. Code is indented by three hundred fucking spaces just to run a query. Your query ends with thirty lines of closing curly brackets.

What was your best moment in your life as a Programmer?
Mine, besides a small amount of good projects for my course, was telling by the phone to a project partner the code, line by line, that would solve a bug in the code and when be put it and run the project it worked. Still need something to top that one XD

MFW we learn the SolarWinds hack would allow remote code to be run at the Department of Energy.

Pretty sure that the code doesn't work on the first run, so I thought why not debug it now? but then when am I actually gonna run it...

Stupid stupid university custom exam IDE... first thing select a few lines hit tab oops replaces code with tab character... compile is alt+C and run is alt+R (never seen that before) and you have to go save -> compile -> run.. instead of just hitting run and last but not least it syncs your code with the server so every save file takes 3-5s at which time the editor freezes

ALSO NO DEBUGGER OR JAVA CONSOLE...

Maybe im wrong but still, damn policies, at my job i need a code review and a commit review before committing code and Im ok with that but hell, I was required to run the api tests when I only modified 2 front end file, i mean seriously i need to run c# tests after modifying angular components. It just seems silly and foolish and a complete waste of time to run the tests for all the projects when i didnt even modified one.

If you work with me and know who I am then stho and accept it. :p

If you're reviewing someone's code, do you run/test the code before reviewing the logic? Or do you review logic before running the code?

Do love it when your code works and the system to implement it works.
But when you run it, it doesn't work.
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻

You join a new team. You find that the code is horrendous. Do you

A. Run away while in probation?
B. Start complaining about it and have the others hate you?
C. Cry silently and hope things will get better?

Anyone know any text editors on mobile and how to run the code?

Halp plz 😵

Sometimes, I run tests just because I want a break from writing code. In good cases it's so that I take a moment to think about what I'm going to do next. In most cases however, I'm struggling for motivation

Some people be like:

MAN: Are you at office?
SE: No, I'm on a airplane at 35000 feet;
MAN: While you are up there, you should write more code. After all you know that bugs won't survive at 35000 feet.
SE:(sighs and facepalms) hmm that a very good point....
MAN: plus you are closer to the cloud, so server code should run faster or with lower latency at least.
SE: (jumps off the plane)

I can remember a day which I really close to crying why my code doesn't work! Then I remember that fucking line of code should be run async! :/

*Write code → run it → works.
*dont even touch that→ run it after few days → doesnt work..WHY?!?!?

"Here customer, have the username, password, and URL of our developer's CI environment! You can test all of your features there. "

" Devs: Please don't make any changes to dev code that would cause the CI system to run."

That's not how this works. That's not how any of this works.

What is easy to code at the moment isnt necessarily the best code in the long run.

- From the dev currently maintaining spaghetties of spaghetti code

Going for a run but still thinking about how I can refactor the code I just wrote. Can't stop thinking about it. Is it just me?

We have all run the same code although it didn't work the first time. And it never worked the second.😂😂

Run program

Doesn't work

Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Open code to look at it again

Dont touch anytghing

0 (zero) modifications

Run again

It works

Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

i adore compiler based programmers. yesterday i changed a bit of python code without being able to run it only to find out later i wasn't even able to spell True and False correctly.

Me to co-worker: The tests are failing because you didn't format your code before submitting your PR

-Co-worker changes the test command to run the format command just before running the tests-

Co-worker: The tests are passing now!

-facepalm-

The worst kind of legacy code is the one in which a function body run miles climbing if-else ladders until nobody knows where the sky hits the floor, and returns when nobody is looking.
The best kind of legacy code is the one which is fully commented out!

I’m thinking of replacing my dev duck with baby yoda.
Btw he’s 50 years old, and I bet his psychic abilities could help me run my code better.

Does anyone have problems with Android instant run?

Fucking hell, I spent one hour yesterday debugging an error, until I noticed that the code in the APK wasn't updated, because it was sending an error of a non-existent line.

Sometimes it works okay, but damn...

Why is the C++ build and package management system so complicated? I feel like whenever I work on a C++ project, I spend more than half my time just figuring out how to set up the environment, build the binaries, run the tests, when I’d rather and should be writing code.

Sigh, I have this terrible habit where I make and run my code in the same command. I'll spend an hour wondering why my bug fix didn't work and it's because the make never succeeded, but the code runs anyways. 😒😒😒

When the QA guy (outsourced to India) asks you what version of Firefox it is that teamcity is using to run the code *double faceplate*

Be me first time using python forced into it.
Get frustrated with all the syntax errors you make and Python's cancerous horseshit syntax.
Chase a weird desync problem between C code client and Python raspberry pi controller.
Make 7000 changes to the code and run out of ideas because nothing makes sense anymore.
Decide to go ahead and write C code.
Find out you've been writing code to a different file and running an older version of the code.
I'm a retatd FML don't be like me.

When I am stuck on a problem, I try to get outside and do something physical. Go for a run, jump on the bike. Find it clears my head and helps me to see the code more clearly.

<Question>
I'm curious: For those of you who have tests running in CI pipelines at work:
How long does it take to run the tests, in relation to the system's size?

At my company, it's ~ 30 mins, testing 1M lines of code (750k SLOC) written in Java (85%) and JS (15%).

Nobody can stop me from deploying an incompletely tested PHP website. If something doesn't work, blame PHP because this abomination shouldn't allow to run shitty code anyway.

This is a group sin.

We'd get the code checked and then run it straight to live. No test environments no real back up in place or process for releasing.

Just run code in if it broke run fix 1 through 3 until you got it right. That was two years ago.

I started a new job, got through on-boarding and took my first ticket. Made my modification to the code base and the tests fail .. each time I run them .. on different tests .. randomly.

What the hell have I gotten myself into?

When you know your code works but when you tell it to run when the app starts and it doesn't work.

Does anyone else use code:block to run C++ code ?

=Your Human Body!!= what do u think you run on in real life??
What do you think you run on??
Brain: C++
Skin and bones: HTML + CSS
Data: Typescript or Javascript Or Node.js
Walking and breathing: Python
Defense: Java cause every white blood cell is a new class
sleeping is basically C++ packing in all the files unless someone gets drunk they cant pack correctly thats why their brain is probably messed up >=) i would say the beer is corrupted code folders

Proud to say 19 hours straight.

My uni has a infamous course work assignment which took about 27 hours to train on the lab PCs.

The issue was we only had a week to do it. So you had to code it, then run it and make it run first time to have a good time.

As we all know, that’s not realistic and I remember staying up the entire time to make sure I had sufficient time to train it. Was a nightmare but got a good grade.

Google codelab's logic :
"uncomment the code from a xyz function
run the test
test fails
uncomment the code from abc function
run the test again
test pass
Congratulations you learned test."
Well apparently this is not how world works Google 😥😌😴

So my day's going pretty well, successfully managed to create a pull request for broken code that breaks more code and run into errors trying to fix it, then spill tea all over my desk/self spazzing trying to fix one child problem like 3 levels deep

Pretty sure I'm the office dunce at this point

Oh god..
Starts using Laravel Framework
Code some lines
Everything works fine now
*Let see what happens if I delete this*
Error
Naturally
*Redo delete*
Run *OK, now it should work like before*
Error
Why??