Found this cool development "workout" app for your ranting pleasure!
check out <Enki/>

<rant>
if (ads_down) {
var FU = [ I program and do digital marketing for my company and tried to make a Twitter campaign but the one I want has been down despite many attempts.
Then I hear they they are shuttering their buy button
I think to my self "thank God!"
Maybe they will fix their ad creator?!

still down....]

return FU
}
</rant>