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Frontend-developer's day is like:

*moving element by 0.0001px to right*:
- *10 new pages appeared*
- *text suddenly disappeared*
- *pictures pierced bottom of page*
- *window.alert("Kill me")*
- *it's night outside the window, but you totally sure a minute ago was a noon*

*moving element back*:
- *no pictures*
- *no text*
- *no moon*
- *10 blank pages*
- *only darkness left in this world...
...and this fcking element, yeah*

because 'bought' us just too mainstream.

I'm one of the first to use devrant. Shoutout to all batchmates out there

Hopefully it's written in Swift!

My Debug Ghost to go with my Debug Tribble at work. Best part is he is entirely 3D Printed!

Knowing the Linux command line saved my bacon!

I was on a plane, unable to connect to wifi, and needed to take a note... while not having any note taking applications or text editing applications on my phone. but what I DID have was a terminal application.

So, I made a file in my documents folder and echoed my notes into the file! A bit longer and more complicated than it needed to be, but it worked when I needed it to!

How can they think that anybody falls for those ads?

Honestly. = != ==
Also: German and English mixed? Choose one, best stick to English if you want to look serious about looking for developers.
What does Job == interested even mean? The job is interested in the candidate?

JavaScript is the ugly girl freshman year with glasses and acne. Typescript is the beautiful women she became senior year and won prom queen. Hate on JavaScript all you want because it was a language written in 2 weeks but the new releases with es6 and now typescript are a far cry from the js people were written back in the day. The times they are a changing -Bob Dylan.

Just saved a life. I was just walking with the dog (it's 3am here) and there was a bleeding drunk on the street - completely unconscious. Must have fallen on his head. Got the police. The paramedics told me a few minutes ago that the guy had a skull fracture. A few hours later it would probably have been too late for him.

So on today's recursion choice:
f(x) vs f(f(x))
PS: Don't kill me for the white theme

So on today's poorly implemented depth first pathing algorithm.

PS: Team White Theme

Friend just asked me to quickly type some stuff he quoted. Fair enough, I like helping out!

"you'll have to do it on windows though"

Ah that's alright haha.

*types in word for 15 minutes, one page done*

(note: genuine word and windows 10 without bloatware etc etc)

*presses ctrl+s*
*clicks save as*

*computer freezes*

😓😨

*waits anxiously*

*computer unfreezes*

*phew*

*presses save as again*

*BLUE SCREEN*

MOTHERFUCKING PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT. SOMEONE PLEASE DESTROY THIS FUCKING SNAKE LICKING, DOG EATING, COCK SUCKING OPERATING SYSTEM.

FUUUUUUUUUCK.

All this stupid people working. I got a 8 Million $ Check from a south african prince. All i need to do is pay 3000$ for the paperwork. Im out you idiots.

I just hate wordpress. Whenever I have to touch it, makes me nervous.

This time I just have to put some html/css. I was thinking it's piece of cake.
Couldn't be more wrong. This fucker is adding extra tags to my code fucking up what made...

"A different error message! Finally some progress!"

A young guy I work with burst into tears today, I had no idea what happened so I tried to comfort him and ask what was up.

It appears his main client had gone nuts with him because they wanted him to make an internet toolbar (think Ask.com) and he politely informed them toolbars doesn't really exist anymore and it wouldn't work on things like modern browsers or mobile devices.

Being given a polite but honest opinion was obviously something the client wasn't used to and knowing the guy was a young and fairly inexperienced, they started throwing very personal insults and asking him exactly what he knows about things (a lot more than them).

So being the big, bold, handsome senior developer I am, I immediately phoned the client back and told them to either come speak to me face-to-face and apologise to him in person or we'd terminate there contract with immediate effect. They're coming down tomorrow...

So part my rant, part a rant on behalf of a young developer who did nothing wrong and was treated like shit, I think we've all been there.

We'll see how this goes! Who the hell wants a toolbar anyway?!

The people who didn't and don't believe in me...

I had consultants who told me not to choose programming as a career path because I wouldn't have enough time for my therapies...

...and JavaScript debugging

Hallucinations of my father that keep taking control of my psyche and making me hack things I don't remember or shooting me in the head to break down my sanity.

Why do people talk so much in the real world. I'm okay with yes/no questions. Talking face to face is exhausting for me. Leave me alone. I'm okay with chat too.

Can't tell these to anybody for real tho.
Sighs.

I'm far from being a Linux fanboy, but Linus Torvalds is such a great guy to listen to while coding. I like how down to earth and straightforward he is. The tech world needs more people like him.

There´s only one bad thing about switching to Linux:
You should´ve been using it from the beginning

Good luck finding docs for eclipse for a while

"Just use jQuery"

In case you didn't know. There is a fish with a binomial name of Boops Boops

BoopsBoops boopsboops = new BoopsBoops();

I spent 10 years of my life to learn how to code when I could make big money without coding. I'm such an idiot

My interviews to hire a Junior Dev will begin this week. Here's how its gonna go down.

Me: Star Trek or Star Wars?

My Supervisor: WTF? How is that relevant?

Human Resources: Let's see what he says.

Applicant: Battlestar Galactica

Me: Nice. I can deal with that.

Me: Tabs or spaces when indenting your code?

Supervisor: ... ?

Human Resources : ...

Applicant: Spaces.

Me: GTFO you imbecile! Next!

Made me chuckle!

Boss says electron-app needs to run on win/mac/linux, but we cannot compile for mac, because we have none. And we cannot use TravisCI for reasons. Welp.

When you write your own unit tests, and feel like an actor doing their own stunts.

No? Anybody?