4
Nmeri17
1y

Tried to work in a corporate setting. Failed. After so many fights, product manager was constantly rejecting my work until I had no choice but to throw in the towel. Spent the next few years slaving away as an open source dev. Not begging for donations. Just decorum when I eventually launch. Instead, I get repudiated by the community, get my account banned at the location where I could have accessed the largest pool of relevant audience. No influencer or dev rel/advocate will respond to my supplication or say beyond a compliment

Barely pick up the pieces, to reimmerse into employed labour. Dozens of applications sent out. My inbox is silent as a graveyard. I start putting more effort into tailored cover letters for each opening, across multiple job boards. One finally rejects me

Even tried changing stack by applying for internship roles in nodejs. A dead end

So, I can't read cuz I was researching for my magnum opus. Now it has gone belly up, that's no more worth it. I also cannot work because my work is complete. It's just sitting on github like a mummy. No interactions, no stars or issues.

Posted on show HN. Not even a single upvote. The funny part is that even when I tried to lament my woes on devrant, their site has been down for hours

To think I was among those who trolled ronaldo with the "rejectnaldo" gimmick. Karma has turned around to bite me in the ass. Rejectnmeri

What to do with this enormous amount of empty time? I neither go out nor watch movies

Even though I'm not terminally ill or gnashing my teeth in physical agony, This is a rare moment when I wish not to have been born. There is no joy in life that makes unpalatable suffering worth it. Why does everything I do have to be contingent on the whims and choices of others? And I have to keep living like that, otherwise I'll return to my village to become a subsistent farmer, cultivating produce to eke out a living. Or seek unskilled labour, earning peanuts for waiting tables. It's a pathetic state of affairs.

All of this sucks tbvh

Comments
  • 0
    There is no such thing as empty time. Just do something you like doing - which actually could even be "nothing" as meditation is a legit activity too (i prefer gaming though).
  • 0
    @Oktokolo you can do that at your disposal. Not when your rent is almost due. What usually occupied my time was studying but what's the point now? That, and hardwork led me nowhere. I can't even sleep at night any more. No peace of mind. Just drowning in a crumbling world
  • 0
    Had the entire plantation razed down when I should have began to reap the fruits of my meritorious labour
  • 2
    @Nmeri17 If you actually have empty time (time you don't know how to fill) - that is the very definition of "at your disposal". If you had actionable things to do, it wouldn't be empty time - you would know how to use it and you would use it.

    That said, you really sound, like you actually don't have enormous amounts of empty time - but are in need of a source of income. Depending on the state of the country that need might be more or less dire and you may or may not need to find a more or less boring and/or taxing job...

    But there really is no point in being in a state of constant dread and/or despair if you can't actually act on the emotion. You should distract yourself from this seemingly unsolvable problem and then sleep. Then spend a day with whatever is fun for you. And the day after you might try to find a solution (probably some temporary job, maybe family or friends) again.
  • 0
    Unfortunately, there is no directory listing such jobs. I imagine those who get it Either do so by referral or by being opportuned to see the signage recruiting applicants

    Do you happen to know someone who is currently hiring for a remote php position or an intern in another stack I can quickly pick up?
  • 0
    @Nmeri17 Nope - and knowing someone is indeed the preferred way to get a job.

    But i started working in IT by working for one of that employment agencies that don't have projects themselves but sell their employee's time to other companies (it is basically like being a day laborer but a bit safer because you still get paid when there isn't any work that day). Back then (a few decades ago) it paid well and wasn't boring. But it was mostly assembling/installing/updating/fixing PCs and servers - as there wasn't much demand for coders back then.

    Today i would expect that companies to have matured into full slaver mentality. So you probably wouldn't get the relatively nice experience i got. But it might still be an option to consider. Also seriously consider actually becoming a farmer if that opportunity exists. Someone has to grow all the food that the people in the cities eat - and you will be way better off in case of a zombiecalypse if you have a farm.
  • 0
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