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AboutDevops Engineer
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SkillsGolang, Python, Dockers, K8s
Joined devRant on 2/20/2018
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Story from my friend who I drank a beer with yesterday:
His manager has balls bigger than elefants.. Hiring a group of anarcho kinda pentest / hacker fucks from a freelance portal from Serbia... Who found quite some shit in their internal systems.
You should think twice about paying them late and especially paying them only half the amount. Even though "they wouldn't sue them anyway".
Sure, they won't.
But take a smart guess what they did.
Fuckin idiot manager.6 -
Guys seriously why would you buy a macbook if apple will support it for like 7 years then you won't be able to upgrade to newer OSX versions? whereas a good laptop machine could run Linux for a lifetime, you could even change distros if you got bored.
Let me dive into it, If I buy a brand new macbook and use it rarely, its condition will barely change however one day I will get the message you need a greater version to install X app, seriously apple?
Real life scenario: I have an ipod touch 5 i rarely use it, one day i decided to install an application and boom no you can't buddy you need to upgrade the iOS however the currently version of iOS is the latest version i could get for that ipod touch model, so the thing is, I have a perfect condition product that is unusable unless for some music playing and what i already installed as apps, does it look fair to you? I have the same issue with an ipad mini, its condition is perfect, battery life is decent, I can't receive anymore updates, the youtube app stopped working, im stuck again with a product that i can use only to read some ebooks or use youtube through the browser, apple wants me to buy a new ipad which is absurd.
I will never buy an apple product again
Fuck you Apple65 -
Dear company, stop installing shit on my work laptop! I guess you love these antivirus and tracking software but I can't do my job with so much slowness.7
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Most of things I'm about to say are experienced by almost 99% of developers in Africa including my country so I'm going to make it a more general rant.
As an African developer, life is both exciting and frustrating at the same time. Some of the challenges that make life difficult for developers in Africa include:
1). Slow Internet Speed: The internet in Africa can be extremely slow and unreliable, making it frustrating to work on projects that require large file downloads. This is a serious challenge for freelance developers who work from home.
2). Unstable Electricity: Frequent power outages due to inadequate infrastructure, insufficient investment in energy production and distribution, and political instability makes it difficult for developers in Africa to work consistently. Most times I get frustrated because you can experience black out at anytime of the day which could last for hours to days automatically rendering you useless if you have no power backup generator at home.
3). Low Pay: While the opportunities for software developers in Africa are quite high, the salary is often disappointing. Many talented programmers end up seeking better opportunities overseas. In fact I quit my full-time job because of this reason.
4). Lack of Support for Tech Start-ups: There are few venture capital firms in Africa willing to invest in new ideas, which makes it difficult for tech start-ups to get off the ground. It's just sad, you can have an idea and just die with it.
So in summary, it's not a walk in the park to be a developer in Africa, but despite all of that I am glad to be a part of the African journey, having the opportunity to had work at a tech agency firm on various projects ranging from healthcare to finance, I find it rewarding to know that my work has contributed to a better future for my continent. 🤞6 -
I'm really excited to meet our intern, she's coming next week 😊😊
I feel like I'm getting a little sister24 -
In an effort to deal with the number of “top priority” tickets, management has come up with a new priority level, “urgent”, to help differentiate between tickets that are “top priority” and tickets that are actually “top priority”.
So as you can guess all tickets are now codified as “urgent”.
I’ve suggested management downgrade some tickets back to merely “top priority” as we’re clearly right back where we started with it being difficult to determine which order to do tickets in.
They’ve ignored my request as the bletherings of a clearly unenlightened peon, and have instead came up with a new priority, “mission critical” which will be reserved for the most hallowed of emerg— oh no wait everything is now “mission critical” who would have guessed?
So “Top priority” is the now lowest priority a ticket can have…Naturally.16 -
Manager: Why did you clear the data from the database? The client is now specifically requesting it and we don’t have it anymore!
Dev: You told me to.
Manager: Well why did you listen? It’s obvious now that that data was very important and should have been kept!
Dev: Last time you told me to do something that wasn’t a good idea I tried to explain why and told me not to question you ever again and that doing so was “disrespectful” and then threatened to have me fired. So now I just go along with what you say and let you suffer the consequences of not listening.
Manager: Well don’t do that then! It’s obviously not working very well! It’s ok to disagree with me you just have to make sure that what you think is something I agree with!
Dev: …11 -
Over the course of a few months, I began to suspect my manager disliked me on a personal level. I decided to be proactive and invited him to a meeting on "Improving our working relationship" - he showed up 5 minutes late and fired me.11
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Messaging me at 4:30pm on a Friday about a high priority issue currently in production.
My reply: a link to the code review from 2 months ago that literally explained the problem and what to do to fix it. That got implemented. Then removed. For some reason...
Feels good.2 -
!!rant
!!ANGER
Micromanager: "Hey, Root!
Since you're back, and still not feeling well, we have an easy ticket for you: Rewrite the slack integration gem! Oh, you don't have to re-implement all of it, just make sure it all works the same way it does now. That bitch you worked with once over a year ago who kept throwing you under the bus to management and stealing credit for your work? Yeah, she wrote the original code like four years ago. It's perfect, so don't touch it. but she can fill you in on all the details you need and get you up to speed on how to test it.
But yep! It should be simple. and I just knew you would love this ticket, so I saved it just for you. Nice and quick, too, to get you an easy win.
You know, since you have to repair your reputation with product. and management. and the execs. and the rest of the team. and me. Yeah, product doesn't trust you so they don't want to give you any tickets. They just can't trust you to get them out and have them work. So you have a lot of hard work to do."
Spoiler: The bus-thrower wasn't much help. (Surprise.)
Spoiler: The ticket was already in my backlog -- one of a grand total of two tickets.
Spoiler: I don't find the ticket fun. Maybe if I was to write the entire implementation with a nice DSL? but no, "don't touch the perfect code." Fuck you.
Spoiler: It isn't going to be nice or quick. But, she (micromanager) is looking to lose me, so that really is an easy win. for her.
And. just. argh. fuck you. i've been exhausted and dying for well over a year, but you've kept ignoring that (and still are, despite me providing goddamn legal forms from fucking doctors stating it in plain fucking english, which you also fucking ignore), and you just keep piling on the work and demanding the ridiculous of me despite it. Yeah I can pull it off sometimes. No, I really shouldn't, and I'm surprised I can. (also, "Time off? What, and lower your productivity even more? ____ doesn't even take vacations. And how are you doing on that ticket?") And no, none of my tickets have ever had any fucking problems. Not even when there are upstream service outages. Not. a. single. fucking. one. Ever. And the only things I've ever missed were things that bloody product never put in the fucking ticket, so fuck you with your "repair your reputation" bullshit.
god, i fuckiNG HATE THESESTUPOID ANWETLJAF SAJEWTKW BITCHFACEDUCKFUCKERS
Why the FUCK am I still fucking working here?
Right, because I've been burned out and dying so much I can't pass a fucking interview so I can fucking leave.
jasdkl;fk
ugh. Anyway. If you ever find yourself starting work at a Cali fintech company whose internal mascot is a very fine duck? Just run. I absolutely guarantee you will be miserable.rant root swears oh my micromanager duckfuckers "trivial" ticket root is fucking fed up root swears a lot holy shit rewrite an entire library in 2-3 days14 -
Companies who geo block their sites for no fucking reason can go fuck themselves.
So a bunch of retarded pharmacies in India, geo block hits from anywhere outside of India.
A thousands of Indians are living abroad with their parents and family living in India.
Imagine, I have to order medicines for my parents since they are not very tech savvy and I cannot do that because some rotten brained guava thought that it's a good idea to geo block access.
What is the fucking point in doing so? There are many such companies, especially Indian who do so. I have keep toggling my VPN because of this.28 -
Prioritize work/life balance
These companies don’t give a F about you
If you die slaving for them, they’ll move on like you never existed to begin with.8 -
Recruiter: Your skills are amazing! There's hight demand! massive shortage! the market is hot!
Me: great
Recruiter: But your rate is too high.
Me: ....7 -
I created an app that plays background sounds to help people focus/study/relax. It’s free and open source. Feel free to try it.
Download from here: https://apps.microsoft.com/store/....
Source code here: https://github.com/jenius-apps/....6 -
I quit and my last day is next week.
Apparently management has decided that I should spend my last day implementing a new feature for a customer where I have been the only developer, and release it to production (without first implementing it in test) the same day. A feature that potentially could cripple a whole workflow if done wrong.
Of course I advised not to release untested code to production on a friday, just before the only person that knows how it works leaves the company. But no, “the customer reaaaaaally wants it before summer, so just be careful not to write any bugs”.
I’m not saying that I’m intentionally gonna write bad code - but if I do, I’m not gonna pick up the phone when it calls.17 -
Just very diplomatically told the VP of Engineering to kick rocks (fuck off) for calling me at nearly 9pm to talk about project planning for a thing that isn’t even in active development.
Asked point blank if we were dealing with a life or death thing. He said no. I replied “then we can talk about this tomorrow”.
He balks and tries to tell me how important it is.
I cut him off “I wasn’t asking you, I am telling you it’s a quarter to 9 and I’m at a bar. This call is over. We’ll talk tomorrow. Good NIGHT”. With as much aggression and pissed off emphasis as I could muster on the ending.
Stay tuned to find out if I still have a job after this.12 -
A client called me today saying their custom website I built for them is down. It just shows a 403 error now. They said they just wanted to update the prices. I asked what changes they made before it crashed. She said, "I couldn't figure out how to change the prices, so I just installed Wordpress, and now it doesn't work!" They completely deleted the entire website using cPanel and replaced it with a partially installed Wordpress.🤦19
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Finally got round to signing up to a VPN for my devices and my sons. After a lot of research decided on surfshark, signed up for 3 years with great discounts. BUT, it doesn’t work on iPhone ( tried everything in the help) still bollox. Cancelled it and went for my second choice which was Nord. The software is great. Worked without issue, same on m1 mac. Thousands of servers worldwide. For me this is great and fast. So if you are looking for a fast reliable VPN Nord is the one. PS not affiliated or work for Nord, just an opinion and hopefully save someone else some grief.12
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Apple paid bounty hunter 18k instead of 250k by silently tweaking their help page, so it seems like the bug is less severe.
Dear apple, I defended you from baseless and opinionated attacks just like I defend every company that is bashed for no reason, but this is some straight up bouba shit. I will still be fair when it comes to your products, still never silencing bugs and downsides and praising what deserves to be praised, but I will always mention this incident when someone asks me about _working_ at apple. That kind of ethics bs can't be silenced just because I enjoy your new arm chip.
https://thezerohack.com/apple-vulne...13 -
So HR invited us to a mandatory hour long talk on why rest and relaxation is important for work efficiency.
On a Saturday.
You can’t make this shit up.15 -
The recruiter in call today is a spoilt brat .
I answer him wether am I know PHP. So I show him my code in PHP (oop) I show should him how I build a restful API and connect to MySql etc.
He told me that's not PHP , PHP don't use define and class , and that's not how you connect to MySql (I'm using PDO) he confused that pdo is something from Java. He told my code is not working because it is java syntax (actually not even closed)
Then I asked him then show me the proper way , he showed me his code in PHP which is started by <PHP instead of <?php (this is fucked up)
And I told him that (after looking at his code), he yelled at me that "there's no mistake, do you really understand PHP? " And he ended the meeting
All this happen in a zoom meeting.22 -
I once worked until 8am to get a demo ready for a client of the client. I knew the client was a bit thick, so I made some comprehensive video demos and sent them over to him, to save him trying to demo it himself. I wake up at 11am with him screaming down the phone at me:
“It doesn’t work, none of it works!”
“What do you mean?”
“I go to login and I can’t enter anything.”
“I haven’t sent you anything to log into...wait, are you trying to log into a video? Tell me you’re not trying to log into a video of a login page.”
“Uh...oh hang on, it just worked. Ok no pr-“
“No wait, what do you mean it worked?”
“I logged in fine.”
“It’s a video. You can’t log into a video.”
“Uh...alright, bye mate, thanks!”
The moral of the story is: never assume any level of intelligence on the part of a client, even if they exhibit signs of it at first. If they are paying you they will forget how to tie their own shoelaces.10