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Product Owner: "Our definition of done is putting it on production. So you are only done if it's on production. Otherwise our sprint goal is failed."
So we put it on production.
After deploy, some content manager appears: "Why is the system doing things? I was told this should not happen today."
"Erm, we have put the feature on production as we are only done if it's on production."
"Well, yes. But it should not be live yet!"
Oh well. Communication, or the lack thereof, does never fail to amaze me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯5 -
Dead 💀 developer.
My first interview,
Back then was technical graduated local CompSchool. Call for a job newspaper, by phone ☎️ the Supervisor assign a date for interview.
In the office the developer guy was amaze because he will hire any from CompSchool he also was student and all stuff made was on the premised of he learned and worked on the company.
About half and hour talks, he write my name on a post-it and put on HR desk.
“Come back tomorrow morning .. tell me you got the job !”
Do so, entering the office next day, was a sad people talking.. the Developer is 💀 dead (drugged on a party).
So this guy “my name in the post-it” is our salvation for all the database, passwords, accounting, etc. and spell my name.
What tha... got the job, the money 💴, was 18 years old, with excessive income (dead guy salarie).
Worked 3 1/2 years for the company.
Thank you 💀 for the opportunity.9 -
That moment that you start typing on your new ergonomic keyboard and suddenly notice that your muscle memory has nearly entirely adjusted to this new keyboard without you even noticing it because you're suddenly typing at full speed while you hardly could type any sentence an hour ago without looking at your keyboard.
This kinda stuff never ceases to amaze me!9 -
So, after weeks of reading spicy rants from all of you, I finally decided to join your community ; even if I'm only a student, I've encountered some solid crap in my internships.
Let's go back in time bois. Two years ago, I started my first intership at a Fortune 500 company (this doesn't exists in France, but whatever, this is nearly the same category). I was supposed to build some file sharing system for the office. Before getting into it, I briefly thought aboyt what technos I could use to build it and make a sweet interface for my co-workers, in 10 weeks, and not a single another day.
Expectations
> Nice team with devs that I could ask things about and learn solid tricks that would even amaze David Copperfield
> Having a nice dev environment
Reality
> Alone on this project
> No fucking dev environment, I had to build everything on Notepad
> No CI
> No SCM
> And, the worst, Ladies and Gentlemans,
I FUCKING HAD TO WORK IN A SINGLE FILE IN A CLOSED ENVIRONMENT.
NO WEBSERVER, NO DEDICATED SPACE.
I HAD TO REQUEST A SPECIFIC ENVIRONMENT IN A CLOSED CUSTOM CMS THAT WAS SERVING FILES, SO THIS FORMAT COULD BE READ ON FOLDER OPENING IN IE9 (FIREFOX FORBIDDEN).
YOU HAD TO MIX HTML, CSS AND JS IN A SINGLE FILE. NO SERVER-SIDE LANGUAGES, ONLY STATIC LINKS, NO FRAMEWORKS (if we can call jQuery, Bootstrap, Semantic UI and all these thinks "Frameworks").
> mfw at the end of the intership
13 -
Technology never stops to amaze me.
I bought hdmi stick with nes emulator, connected it to power using usb on my tv directly no power adapter needed - only cable, it has 2 remote pads powered by batteries, all fits into my pocket and it has removable sdcard that I can connect to my computer and upload games.
I can go to someone’s house, bring up this little fella and we can play games together. It only took 40 years to do it.
Damn I remember playing, mario, contra or micro machines as a kid.
Spent 8+ hours playing great old games already lol.
I just need portable 60 inch tv screen or projection screen and battery that would power it for at least 8 hours and fit to my pocket and my life is complete.
Imagine you go to the bar, sit, grab a beer and play mario with random people all night.6 -
i hate my life sometimes.
as much as i can write frontend all day long and in my sleep, it never seems to amaze me how quick you can get into a deep nesting of elements in HTML.
14 -
A couple of weeks ago, I got to the second stage of a recruitment process with a relatively big fintech in the crypto space (I know) - all went well and although I did not think much of it at first, with all the information I had gathered I came to realize this might as well be the best opportunity I've had in my pursuit of finding a new job (i.e looking for high technical challenges, unsure of where I see myself in 5 years, wanting to give full-remote work a try, etc.).
Cue to the end of the interview;
"That's great! I really enjoyed speaking with you, your technical background seems excellent so we would like to move to the next stage which is a take-home test to do in your free time.", said the interviewer.
"Wow! Much amaze, well of course! What's it gonna be?", said the naive interviewee.
"I'm sending you the details via email, please send it back in 48 hours, buhbye now", she hangs up.
...
"48 hours?? Right, this should be easy then, probably some online leetcoding platform, as usual.", thought the naive interviewee, who evidently went through this sh*t numerous times already.
A day later I receive the email: this was the whole deal. The take-home test supreme with bacon and cheese. A full-blown project, with tests, a project structure, a docker image, testing and bullet points for bonus points! The assessment was poorly written with lots of typos and overall ambiguity, a few datasets were also provided but bloated with inconsistent comments and trailing whitespace.
What the actual fck??? Am I supposed to sleep deprive myself to death while also working my day job? What are you trying to assess? How much of my life I'm willing to sacrifice for your stupid useless coding challenge? You are not all Google, have some respect, jeez.
I did not get the job.2 -
Have you ever thought that even today, if you had a very large "file", say 10 petabytes, that it would take 74 hours on a 300 Mb/s connection to transfer it anywhere in the world , therefore it would still be much faster to fly it physically anywhere, even with the ~5 hour time to transfer it to some sort of drive(s) at 5 gigabits a second.9
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Sometimes the pebkac is so strong it continues to amaze me.
Step 1: customer updates pos software
Step 2: customer is presented a perfectly reasonable UAC screen with yes/no choice
Step 3: customer panics and takes no further action
Step 4: a few hours later the first customer enters the store and more panic ensues as the update is still waiting on the uac
Step 5: the customer calls us in panic and acuses us of writing shut incomprehensible software
Wish this was an once in a year exception, untill we wrote a bypass for the whole uac crap this was a daily occurance.4 -
Oh, my boss never fails to amaze me...
Every fucking time he talks about changes to someone outside the team he says something like:
"we always gotta be prepared for breaks because it is always like that, you change something here and when you see you broke something there"
All in a manner that *tries* to bring tensions down.
And every time I explain to him why the fuck automated tests are important and wtf they do he always manage to understand it as a waste of time...
I'm never gonna give up, motherfucker.2 -
Lets create a library.
Lets use that library in a project.
Lets wrap the library call in a wrapper functione to remove duplicate code.
Lets add an overloaded wrapper call that wraps the wrapper call that calls the library to partially undo the duplicate code removal.
Lets add another overloaded wrapper call that wraps the wrapper call that wraps the wrapper call that calls the library to partially undo the duplicate code removal.
How I love it. Not.
Sometimes redundancy makes sense, especially when it are two lines which make it obvious whats going on vs a single line that leads to a fuckton of overloaded wrapper functions.
Sheeesh.
Today in "code monkeys deserve divine punishment".
Another funny thing is creating a Helper class for Junit 5 tests, making it instantiable and adding to it all kinds of shit like testcontainer creation, applications instantiation, mocks, ....
... Then " crying " why the tests are so slow.
Yeah. Logic. Isolation of concerns, each test should be a stand alone complex.
But that would lead to redundancy... Oh no.
Better to create a global state god object.
Some devs... Really amaze me, especially when they argument in ways that makes one really wonder whether they are serious or just brain dead.4 -
It continually never ceases to amaze me how many people ask me a question without doing the proper research beforehand. For instance, "How far is the Earth from Jupiter?" How am I supposed to know that? The only thing I'm going to do is Google it and then tell you anyway. Stop asking me stupid questions that you can easily search yourself!9
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it always amaze me when client thinks that new layout for his site will solve all performance problems3
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I work in a consulting firm.
I started right after graduation. I entered with candy glasses. Thinking is all well and ready to climb the ladder.
I entered as a junior developer.
On my first project, i am constantly belittled by my team lead. To the extent i suffer from ptsd.
On my second project, i am the only dev. I am amaze i manage to handle all the development job by myself for a year. Still i get nasty comments from my boss. Despite i am able to deliver on time.
On my third project. i left due to office politics.
Currently i am in my fourth project. The code is complete mess. The development environment is crappy. It doesn't reflect change right away.
My passion has dried up.
I'm seriously giving thoughts, should i switch career path.12 -
Developing a web portal to handle college placements.
During the showcasing of the project ,this senior lecturer comes up to us and just when we started the explanation,he stops in mid sentence and asks "where is the artificial intelligence". When the entire portal was built to automate the process,he wanted some AI.
We were dumbstruck. The stupid expectations of senior faculty never cease to amaze me.
3 -
It never ceases to amaze me just how big 64 bit memory space is. It's so unrealistically big that on contemporary processors you can't address the middle and the size of that dead spot (the number of high bits that must be the same in a valid address) is barely worth mentioning.1
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It never ceases to amaze me how the business end can get in the way of sensible, efficient development. I get why, to an extent, but it's really mind-blowing at times.
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VS never ceases to amaze me.
What's the point of a FUCKING IDE that
suggests compilation errors with its autocomplete?
What's the fucking point!?
CommandTimeout is an int, not a TimeSpan.
I want autocomplete to HELP ME, not to waste my time with irrelevant noise based on on some AI bullshit.
I want to know who are the motherfuckers who thought this was a good idea. I fucking hate them.
Does someone know how to disable this shit? I disabled everything in Options->Intellicode, but that shit keeps popping up.
Visual Studio 2022, btw
6 -
looking back its going to amaze future generations how stupid we were to waste so many energy related resources on creating a fake currency just so people could pay for hookers.8
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hmm.... whats those this say to you? I'm sort amaze they even would consider selling these books as bundles...
https://humblebundle.com/books/...
4 -
https://micronaut-projects.github.io/...
Micronaut never ceases to amaze me.
Compared to commons cli, the annotation based approach makes it simple.
Fat jar, easily distributable.
Modularity of micronaut, easy to pick only what you need.
I am.... Happy?
Ugh. That was a disturbing word.3 -
The adventurous world of javascript and typescript never ceases to amaze me.
I'm investigating some paths to take for migrating this legacy project which has incurred some technical debt. Because of... reasons... even the frontend Vue project needs to be built on a Windows system. No, you can take your hands down, even wsl or docker aren't alternatives here. It's a long story and ties in with said debt.
I'm keen on rebooting the entire frontend using a newer Vue cli and scaffold up all the essentials like eslint and typescript which is currently not used. This is gonna be sweet.
Except, typescript (BY Microsoft) doesn't play well on a Windows (BY Microsoft) filesystem because of a recent change to support - get this - wsl. I can't decide if it's hilariously ironic or genius.
This response about sums up my current mood. https://github.com/Microsoft/...
Of course, further digging in other repos like node only turns up issues closed due to it being on Windows' end.
So now my readme has a troubleshooting section describing how to make changes to your filesystem if you run into issues in Windows and I want to go home.6 -
http://bloomberg.com/graphics/...
Re-reading this article today and still amaze me how someone can resume such a vast world of concepts. A must read -
Linux, you never fail to amaze me!
Started using Arch based Manjaro with xfce de couple of months ago. Everything was mostly fine even though I've never used anything that was based on Arch but it had a learning curve.
Couple of weeks ago I couldn't update my packages, I thought it would fix it by itself but I was wrong as you already probably know.
So yesterday I tried to manually fix it. Famous last words. After a lot of googling, trying some terminal commands - and failing, I see a warning labek on some text on the arch wiki - sudo pacman -Syi --force. I said fuck it and did it. Let's see if it works, I try to install a package, I mistype the name, press backspace - it puts a space instead of deleting?!?!?
I tried restarting, googling - nothing...
Guess I'll switch back to Debian based OSes.5 -
Javascript is my main tool at work right now, Typescript to be precise. It never ceases to amaze me, I guess as most of you.
What I've encountered recently still doesn't make sense to me but it seemingly works:
function a(){
someString && someFunction()
// other stuff ...
}
someString can be a string or undefined, someFunction can be a function or undefined.
How is that valid Javascript, without an assignment? Haven't found any explanation yet.22
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