Hahaha 😀

Acknowledge my code 😂

So I was hired about 4 months or so in this companty, we will name it 'Derp & Co.'

The first task they want me to do was to 'clean' an android app that, for what they told me:

- Previous dev fired. said that tasks have been done but totally a lie.
- Took a fully week of 2 fellows coworkers to 'undo' the mess.
- And for the last but not least, zero documentation, like ZERO.

So, I clone the repo, install android studio, blah blah blah, get hands to the pile of code and jesus...

- The whole app was working with a gargantuan json, there was no use of POJOs at all. Objects are for normies.
- A masive copy/paste code, like 'I will need this here, crtl-c... ctrl-v, DONE!'
- Threads are free, isn't it? let's just put a thread whenever I desire to make an HTTP request and not reuse code at all.

So... with this on mind, my first task is to make proper objects:
- Coworker: 'Sorry dev, we don't have documentation for this, you must debug the code to se what the server will send to you'.
- Me: 'Real?'

Shit... ok. So I first try to figure out how the hell is made my gargantuan json. A month was entirely lost to unravel this data and implement Objects, improve their code, reuse code, etc. but at the very end:

- coworker: 'Good job dev, when the POJOs are done, we can focus on the next task, whe have to define a new DATA MODEL because the one we are using now is not good at all'.

*note: the app is on production and working with all the previous 'features' and today it still on use on some enviroments.

- Me: 'Wait... this is a joke, now you want to define new data models? This should have been done in first place!' <WTF face>
- Coworker: 'I don't think so dev, Mr. boss have this list with things to improve on the app an this is the order of do the tasks'.

Mr. boss is on vacations, two days after he came back:

- Mr boss: 'Coworker said that you have been working with POJOs, is that right?'
- Me: 'Yes'
- Mr boss: 'Why? Did not see the need of a new data model?'
- Me: 'I told that to him, but he insist on "the order" of the list.
- Mr. boss <facepalm>

This is one of the few tales i have from 'Derp & Co.'

PS: Sorry if i made a mistake on writing, english is not my first language and maybe I have done some mistakes.

// Return result
return result;

I found this in one of my older projects. And I felt it.

Tester: I'm going to start testing your Android code. How do I set up it?

Me: just bring me an Android test device and I'll show you

Tester: *comes back holding a big golden phone*

Me: *huh? Haven't seen that Android device before... I wonder which manufacturer made it*

Tester: *puts down golden phone on my desk* here you go!

Me: 😱😱😱😱
...
HUH? This is an iPhone!!!!
😩😱😧😖😰😫😵😱😱

Ummmmm, Visual Studio Updater, you feeling ok Hon?

"Microsoft should not need to buy github, the platform itself should be ran by a non profit org like wikipedia or linux."

Add a herp a derp at the end. It will probably make it sound less stupid or hypocritical.

Seriously though, how many of you mecos actually pay for shit? Eh? How many of you donate to your fav Linux distros or web platforms?

Lets say that the entire devrant base did :) pretty sweet eh? There are still 28 million developers on fucking github.....now how many of those contribute to help account for server costs etc? How many actually use private paid repos etc?

And without adds and shit? This ain't Facebook!!

It makes sense. I am glad they did... and fuck you I would too.

I will see what happens before I put on my (disgusting) Richard Stallman Hat.

So, the job I refer to as Hell finally deleted my work email account yesterday.

I've been getting (and ignoring) emails on that account for years now. Probably still have production access and push rights, too. 🙄

😜 arrays

I do programming with htpl

Not me, but a colleague questioned himself for a while over this one. He simply forgot a semicolon when doing some server maintenance:

sudo yum remove application1 sudo yum remove application2

This didn't just remove application1 and 2, it removed sudo and yum too. One slightly embarrassing call to the ops team later, we had to replace the box.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is why you should automate your server maintenance!

not the worst by itself, except I keep finding them everywhere

if(thingThatIsTrue == true) {
// omfg
}

or it's inbred cousin

if(!thingThatIsTrue == false) {
//herpa derp
}

Received a urgent email from a business client saying that the application we support is completely broken. Their staff said they used the app to send several submissions that day but they did not come through. This is a major issue as these submissions need to occur daily.

I understand that this is a priority so I immediately check everything. I test the app, the server, check the database. Everything seems fine, but there's no record of these submissions. Maybe it's the specific device that was used. I reply saying that everything seems to be in order. Can I please be provided with more information about what occurred? What time were the submissions sent?

Client replies saying that the submissions were definitely sent and that the staff swear by it.

I now know something is up, so I remote into the the devices in question and check the logs. The app was not even used that day! I've got them! Those liars!

I am now quite pissed off, but remain professional and reply saying that we log all app events and that the logs show that the app had not been used at all that day. Now they have to own up to their lie. Right?

Wrong. Client replies with: The issue has been fixed. Thanks.

Can you believe the bloody nerve? The client doesn't even have the decency to apologise but rather insinuates that it was all our fault.

Well I'm not having that. I reply: It is great that the app is functioning correctly. However, I believe it is important to understand the cause of the issue as to prevent it from occuring again.

Client: No reply.

Well, if you want to waste other people's time, here's the fat bill.

Moral of the story. Don't trust anything that the client says and for any issue, debug the user before doing anything else.

Was scrolling some old photos and fell on that gift my bf gave me at Christmas 2016. The cover was so perfectly done, I thought for a few seconds it was a real special edition made by Nintendo just for the lolz...
Dat Moon Moon

Is it just me or does it look like I accidentally spelled “derp” in git contributions?

Wanted to live outside the US. Was dating a Korean girl who moved back to Korea and was like why the hell not, let's go.

Worked at an American company that had a Korean office, so i thought it'd be easy mode. Took a working vacation to that office and interviewed. Brain froze on basic algorithms stuff - binary search. Failed to understand a logic question. But oddly enough, did well communicating with Korean developers with limited English knowledge.
Director talks to me at the end of the day, tells me they're looking for someone more senior. I bombed it, not mad.

...

Then he tells me he has a friend at one of the largest companies in Korea and that he'll be there to talk to me in two hours.
Dafuq

Chat with the dude. Supposedly, the larger company culture blows, but he has a little haven of badass developers and is known throughout the company for being an effective team builder. We talk for 90 minutes, and he days he'll hire me. Take a short online test to make sure I'm not a derp. Four months later, living in Korea and working, alas, sans girlfriend.

Been a year now. Ends up the company culture eventually crushed my boss. He was moved off the project, and then the project was scrapped. Yet they're starting a new project with the same group plus more because logic.

Today accepted an offer at a smaller company for a salary equal to my current salary plus bonus. Also, vidya gaems yayy.

I have got to have the silliest luck

Meeting of two lovers...

!dev

So, the house next door to me is being renovated into half a dozen apartments. This process has been ongoing for like 4 years of here-and-there houseflipper failboating, and if I had to guess, 3 owners worth of this fuckery.

The latest shitheel trying to polish this turd into something saleable has had it sit partially covered with plastic for months, mostly getting rained on. One crew came by last week and put half the thermal shielding up before something happened and they left. Then half of it fell off the house, into my yard. Nice person that I am I gathered it all up and left it in the various excavated pools of water on their property in which I can only imagine they are busily raising farm to table mosquitoes for the local market.

FF to today and I see a crew pull up to the house and start nailing plywood to the side of the house with no thermal pad underneath it. Which is a legit code violation and a mold hazard, but yolo amirite? I chat up some of the guys and find out that they were scheduled to install the plywood today (apparently he'd run out of money for the nice modular siding they used on the back half) and the owner didn't give a shit if the rest of the work was done. Meanwhile shit is still falling off the house onto my house, but also wgaf. 🚬

Tl;Dr the people trying to flip the house next to mine were obviously IT managers in a previous life.

Summary of my life.

I have installed Ubuntu 18.04 app on my machine - Windows 10. And it is fucking awesome. 😄

tl;dr:
The Debian 10 live disc and installer say: Heavens me, just look at the time! I’m late for my <segmentation fault

—————

tl:
The Debian 10 live cd and its new “calamares” installer are both complete crap. I’ve never had any issues with installing Debian prior to this, save with getting WiFi to work (as expected). But this version? Ugh. Here are the things I’ve run into:

Unknown root password; easy enough to get around as there is no user password; still annoying after the 10th time.

Also, the login screen doesn’t work off-disc because it won’t accept a blank password, so don’t idle or you’ll get locked out.

The lock screen is overzealous and hard-locks the computer after awhile; not even the magic kernel keys work!

The live disc doesn’t have many standard utilities, or a graphical partition editor. Thankfully I’m comfortable with fdisk.

The graphical installer (calamares) randomly segfaults, even from innocuous things like clicking [change partition] when you don’t have a partition selected. Derp.

It also randomly segfaults while writing partitions to disk — usually on the second partition.

It strangely seems less likely to segfault if the partitions are already there, even if it needs to “reformat” (recreate) them.

It also defaults to using MBR instead of GPT for the partition table, despite the tooltip telling you that MBR is deprecated and limited, and that GPT is recommended for new systems. You cannot change this without doing the partitions manually.

If you do the partitions manually and it can’t figure out where to install things, it just crashes. This is great because you can’t tell it where to install things, and specifying mount points like /boot, /, and /home don’t seem to be enough.

It also tries installing 32bit grub instead of 64bit, causing the grub installer to fail.

If you tell it to install grub on /boot, it complains when that partition isn’t encrypted — fair — but if you tell it to encrypt /boot like it wants you to, it then tries installing grub on the encrypted partition it just created, apparently without decrypting it, so that obviously fails — specific error: cannot read file system.

On the rare chance that everything else goes correctly, the install process can still segfault.

The log does include entries for errors, but doesn’t include an error message. Literally: “ERROR: Installation failed:” and the log ends. Helpful!

If the installer doesn’t segfault and the install process manages to complete, the resulting install might not even boot, even when installed without any drive encryption. Why? My guess is it never bothered to install Grub, or put it in the wrong place, or didn’t mark it as bootable, or who knows what.

Even when using the live disc that includes non-free firmware (including Ath9k) it still cannot detect my wlan card (that uses Ath9k).

I’ve attempted to install thirty plus times now, and only managed to get a working install once — where I neglected to include the Ath9k firmware.

I’m now trying the cli-only installer option instead of the live session; it seems to behave at least. I’m just terrified that the resulting install will be just as unstable as the live session.

All of this to copy the contents of my encrypted disks over so I can use them on a different system. =/

I haven’t decided which I’m going with next, but likely Arch, Void, or Gentoo. I’d go with Qubes if I had more time to experiment.

But in all seriousness, the Debian devs need some serious help. I would be embarrassed if I released this quality of hot garbage.

(This same system ran both Debian 8 and 9 flawlessly for years)

age += 1
print("Spent 8400 days on Earth ☺")
print("!em ot yadhtriB yppaH"[::-1])

For the first time I tried to use WordPress. I spent almost 30mins. Now I decided I should not use that again in my life. Fuck WordPress.

While I code...

Aged but still works...

When I was in school, I had a period called "computers" every week. We were told by our computer teacher to remove our shoes outside the computer lab to prevent viruses from entering the computers.

Sorry, long since my last post...

I have quit my job recently at DERP & CO.. The level of anxiety was already somewhat of medical severity.

For months I had been in a project that not only did not progress, but that it was getting worst day by day.

A bit of Context

November: "Dev, junior anon needs you to help him on the SHIT project because they are running out of time, it is mainly doing unit tests."
Well, the code was a mess, there was a LOT of copy paste and it was all bad quality (we talk about methods with complexities between 80 and 120 according to SONAR QUBE).
Dev: "Anon, you know this is wrong, right?"
Anon: "Why? it works"
Dev: after long explanation.
Anon: "Oh well, yes, from now on I will take it into account." And he did it / try his best.

Dev does the unit tests and do extra work outside of the reach of the sprint (y than i mean work after hours, classic) and alerts the boss of the mess.

December: After a project of approximately 6 or 8 months of development, the boss discovers that the junior anon have been doing everything wrong and/or with poor quality (indicating that throughout the whole development the quality of the code was NEVER checked nor the functionality).

Boss: "This is a shit. Dev, you have to correct all the errors and warnings marked on sonar", which are around 1200 between smelling code, high risk errors, etc.

Dev fixes something like 900 bugs... lots of hours...
Boss: "This still is all wrong, we have to redo it. We will correct the errors leaving something stable and we will make a new repository with everything programmed as it should be, with quality and all"
- 900 corrections later, now are irrelevant -
Boss: "Dev, you will start to redo it, anon is out on other project. First you must leave the existing one working properly"
Dev: "ok ..."

January: How can I correct the mess if the client asks for more things. I am just fixing the mess, doing new functionalities, and when I have free time (outside the work) I try to advance the new repository, poorly I must say because burntout.

Boss: "Everything should be arranged at the end of January, so that you can redo everything well in February."
I can't handle everything, it starts to fall further behind. Junior Anon quits the job.

February: Big Bad Bugs in the code appear and practically monopolize the month (the code is very coupled with itself and touching in one place sometimes meant breaking other stuff).

Boss: "It can't be, you've been with this since January and you haven't even started correcting this mess in the new repo"

Dev: "It is that between the new things that are requested and the bugs I cannot put myself with that"
Boss: "Do not worry, you will be helped by random dev if you needed. SPOILER ALERT: random dev is allways bussy. Not made up bussy, He had a lot of work by itself, but it can't help me the way I need it.

High anxiety levels, using free time to try to reduce the work left and gradually losing the taste for develop.

March: So far, not only do they add new things day and day, but now they want to modify things that were already "ok", add new ones and refactor everything in a new repo. I just did not see an end of this nonsense.
Dev breaks, the doctor says it's anxiety, so I just know what I have to do.
Dev: "I quit my job"
Cool Manager: "Damn, why?"
Explain everithig
Cool Manager: "Do you want to try if I can change you to other project or anotjer scope on the same project?"
Dev: "Thanks, but no Thanks. I need to stop for a while".

End. sry for long sad post and maybe poor use of English (?) Not my native language.

Today at 'Derp & Co' a fellow co-worker decided that had duplicated data on Relational DB is good!

- Dev: 'but what if we have 2 companies in diferents groups?''

- co-worker: 'Just call it company A and Company B'

- Dev: 'but... this is not what...'

- co-worker: 'Trust me Dev, is the easy way'

I want the professional way, not the easy (and damn wrong) way :(, I can't improve myself like this.

Also, dead line is here too... TT^TT
Last sprint and still with doubts about the DB structure.

Fuck me sideways. I work for a small business doing most of their IT work, a lot of which is in-house software development. Today I was working on a feature of our employee schedule system that I wrote and for the last couple of hours, my laptop (which is my dev machine) kept freezing up on me every ten minutes or so... 😬

Well, I finally found the cause, but only after running apt-get update/upgrade to see if updating fixed the issue. I haven't updated in a LONG time... Productivity is not on the agenda for today I suppose.

just hate it when exams approach and the whole month I neither code nor study , well derp

Rant time of 'Derp & Co.'

Today I decided that I am going to find another job, I just can't keep with this shit.

They said that use Agile: FALSE.
• Daily (best scenario) take like 1 hour and a half.
• New task enter the sprint and "Fuck you, more task in the same time". This is something regular done.

• "Oh, dev, we need you to check this other project" I am in the middle of my sprint on this project. "But you have to fix this bug here". (3 fucking days the bloody bug) "You are late again with tasks".

• Meeting for fresh sprint: 6 BLOODY hours... nonstop

The workflow is garbage:
• SOMEONE should did all the devops shit on the first sprint, guess what? They did nothing!, guess now who is being blamed for it (not only me, but a few coworkers).

• Nothing is well designed/defined:
~ task are explained like shit
~ times measured wrongly
~ We are in the last fucking SPRINT and still doing de ER of the DataBase cause Oh, apparently no one has work before with SQL (damn you MongoDB! (Not really)) so I am doing my best, but "jezz dev, this is so hard... maybe we can do it WRONG and easy".
~ No one is capable of take responsability of their mess, they just try to push down the problems. (Remember the devops situatuion? Why is.my fault? I came at the 3 or 4 sprint and I am doing backend tasks, I know nothing about devops).

But the big prize, the last one:
• Apparently you can't send whatever you want to the boss, it has to pass a filter previously of coordinators and managers, hell yeah!

And I am an idiot too!
because I see that we can't reach our schedule and do hours on my spare time!
This is because there are a few good coworkers who probably ended with my unfinished tasks... and they are equaly fucked as me...

This is just the tip of the iceberg. I am not a pro, I am not a full stack developer and still need to learn a lot, but this is just not normal, eight months like this...

A few days back I talked to a person who is far away from me with an air distance of 7937km and electronic signals moving at almost speed of light crossing countries. That was good decent conversation.

On our Android tablet app, we had to have the hamburger menu on the bottom right corner (normal top left). It sorta became the floating action button...

Fuck-a-doodle-do Fuck Fuck Fuck what a fucking dipshit. Scared the god damn shit out of me.

So I am deep in code, listening to my music pounding out some code and Drupal configurations and I feel a shadowy draft over my right side like someone is watching me.

I work with a guy that will not for the fucking life of me use Slack to send me a message when I have my headphones on or at all for that matter.

He gets up and walks to my cubicle and just stares with a goofy fucking grin on his face. You know the one. LIke a retarded fucking dog eating shit out of a wire brush. Yeah that's the grin. Silently derping with his fucking derp ass Derp McDerpington face waiting on you to turn around an notice him there instead of knocking on the cubicle wall or waving to get your attention.

The FUCK dude? CreepyPasta

!rant

I aliased the go package manager dep to derp

I do this because I consider myself a grade A derper.

I derp hard when I write in go, not because of not getting the language,on the contrary....I feel quite profficient in it which gives me the ability to derp whilst cosing.

Go is amazing. Such a boring language in the best way possible in terms of syntax but so fun in productivity.

Microservices galore l.

I love it when asshats, that wear testicles for sunglasses, like to ask me a question about my past experience with a given technology. Let's call it "X". After I've said my piece about the desired effect "X" was supposed to achieve, and describe the environment/scope where "X" was used, and describe the pain points I've encountered with it or the headaches "X" has caused in those environments, these camel spunk garglers then try to immediately rebut me by saying that every one of the times they've set "X" technology up it's worked just fine.

So, I kindly remind them that my past experience was in large enterprises where "X" technology just doesn't scale well so I've seen some issues with it.

Spunk Gargler: "Hmmm, must've just not been setup correctly."

I lose my shit (internally of course because I can't afford to be without a job right now.) and say, "I'm not so sure that it wasn't setup correctly, I just don't think that 'X' works properly at the scale of 500+ employee environments well. You've only ever set it up in small offices of like - what, 20 users?"

Shitlord McHerp-a-Derp who's Drunk on Spunk: "Maybe, but it just sounds like a bad configuration was causing those issues to me."

He shuffled back into his office shortly after I basically told him he's a fucking chump playing small team tactics and I've seen shit at scale so I've seen first hand what does and does not work well.

I'm writing this because this is the same fucking imbecile that has only ever encountered a /23 network once before from a client they inherited from a previous MSP team and they didn't know how to "safely change it" to a /24 so they just left it in place.

(BTW, just for the non-networking guys/gals out there, I'm sure you've already guessed it, but a /23 network is NOT a fucking problem!)

These puffy cancerous taint boils that call themselves IT engineers are the fucking problem!

I'm not a dev by trade or training, but trying to learn DevOps, and I can totally see why Dev teams can/sometimes get pissed with infrastructure teams... infrastructure/helpdesk side of IT is full of these fucking meat heads.

Today at 'Derp & Co' is the end of the last sprint, no one have close all the task asigned. Myself included.

- that sucks...

Because there are task from previos sprints still in TODO that block other tasks.

- oof

But there is more... Yesterday was the deadline of the project. From today and onwards the client get discount.

- oof (but fair to the client)

Management have in mind AT LEAST 4 more weeks of development.

- But... how... wtf?

In 2 weeks part of the hardware we need for the project will return to the client.

- <smash the door and leave>

Management still is asking if we can do it on time...

- yeah... just call the Doctor, we need a TARDIS ASAP

GIT COMMMIT LOG VERSION 011
-------------------------
4cc7d0d Derp, asset redirection in dev mode
6b6e213 Lock S-foils in attack position
1e44549 I am even stupider than I thought
2f6bec9 You should have trusted me.
891851a To those I leave behind, good luck!
3367d77 Update .gitignore
46d6b0f Merging the merge
b12f6fe First Blood
0598e4f 8==========D
9151ff4 Finished fondling.
3a0ec1e ...
8358c20 c&p fail
bc1e834 magic, have no clue but it works
31bb17a I don't get paid enough for this shit.
21edb91 :(:(
7a71610 Stephen rebase plx?
2060661 Copy-paste to fix previous copy-paste
21ac5d2 Handled a particular error.
2dedd90 pam anderson is going to love me.
c3d4c83 omg what have I done?
d38bafd Herping the derp derp (silly scoping error)
e461773 Merge pull request #67 from Lazersmoke/fix-andys-shit Fix andys shit
1faf82b Is there an award for this?
1f6e3f3 Feed. You. Stuff. No time.
6f0097d I'm too old for this shit!
133179e I'm just a grunt. Don't blame me for this awful PoS.
d3e5202 harharhar
57d9a7c THE MEM TEST FUNCTION YOU ARE LOOKING FOR, IS HERE. SAY THANKS FOR THIS COMMIT MESSAGE

Meeting at 'Derp & Co', the topic was what data model should send the back-end to frontend & app via API calls:

- Coworker: 'we should send the data structured like this for reasons'.
- Me: 'Yeah, this nested object.object.object should do the trick for the front end, but this will be a pain in the ass to convert to POJOs. Why not use something like idk better structure?'

<Mad/intrigued faces>

- CoworkerS: 'Why you need to use POJOs?'
- Me: <More Mad> 'cause I work with java in android... and we have/need/like objects?

<Captain Obvious left the room>

- CoworkerS: 'Oh yeah, well... we can do it the way you say'.

Why you need Objects... what is the next?
- Git? For what? Did not have the usb key from day one?

I can code in so many languages or understood many more, but I cant spell for shit and this times table sheet is my enemy lol and it's only a 7+ book lol

Microsoft.Graph has filtering capabilities for dates, which is great.

Format is: "2018-04-12T12:00:00Z"

Doesn't natively support string conversion of a DateTime to match the pattern... Nor does Graph accept any date formats such as the "s" parameter for sortable dates, which goes into milliseconds, etc.

DateTime.ToString("derp");

Sometimes I wish I was a Java Dev.

This is so nice..💙😄

<Heading> 
Synopsis of Gita (religious book of Hindus)

<Stanza 1> 
Code is an illusion
Today you are coding
Tomorrow someone else would do it
Thereafter someone else

<Stanza 2>
What did you learn
That is helping you in this Project
What are you learning
That will help you in your next Project

<Stanza 3>
Bug is the truth of life
It is today, and will remain forever
You think you have debugged the Bug
You are wrong

<Stanza 4>
It is continuous
In various new forms
It pops up
Recognise it Parth (Son of Hindu God)

<Stanza 5>
That's why go on making Codes
Don't think about the Bug
They will come to you
On their own

Universe has been working in my favour lately 😜

i have been browsing trough my gists and this is what I have found.

HAI
HOW DUZ I PRINTSMILE
VISIBLE "SMILEZ!"!
IF U SAY SO

HOW DUZ I PRINTSMILEZ NUMBERZ
I HAS A SMILEZLINE ITZ ""
IM IN YR LOOP NERFIN YR NUMBERZ WHILE NUMBERZ BIGGR THAN 0
SMILEZLINE R SMOOSH SMILEZLINE AN "SMILEZ!" MKAY
IM OUTTA YR LOOP
VISIBLE SMILEZLINE
IF U SAY SO

VISIBLE "O HAI! NOT MY WERK! LOL!:):)DIS WAY CUZ I LIEK SMOOSH:)"

I HAS A COUNTER ITZ 3
IM IN YR LOOP NERFIN YR COUNTER WHILE COUNTER BIGGR THAN 0
PRINTSMILEZ COUNTER
IM OUTTA YR LOOP
VISIBLE ":)N DIS WAY CUZ QUESTION. LOL!:)"
COUNTER R 3
IM IN YR LOOP NERFIN YR COUNTER WHILE COUNTER BIGGR THAN 0
I HAS A UDDERCOUNTER ITZ COUNTER
IM IN YR INNERLOOP NERFIN YR UDDERCOUNTER WHILE UDDERCOUNTER BIGGR THAN 0
PRINTSMILE
IM OUTTA YR INNERLOOP
VISIBLE ":)"!
IM OUTTA YR LOOP
VISIBLE ":)LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!:):)KTHXBYE"
KTHXBYE

I label all packages I know are coming as being for a company: Derp Industries. This is from an old in-joke between my friends and I. This tells me whether a package was something I ordered or not from the label (as I often forget I have a package coming.) However, I just got a call from a DHL driver asking me how long we'll be open. I, uh... I told him we close at 8. He said that's perfect, as he has to pick up from the local holding station at 5 and i'm his first stop.

I'm tempted to call back and tell him I'm just a dude living in a trailer...

201, an intro programming course using Python2. Prof was funny. She was a Redditor and slipped the casual troll face or derp face or other rage comic character in her lecture slides.

print("Python is fucking awesome!!")

I've just spent the last hour or so banging my head against a brick wall trying to figure out why I'm unable to retrieve some data via AJAX even though I know data is being returned as I can see it in my error log.

Turns out the permission system I wrote a few days ago actually works and because I didn't specify a permission it automatically denied my user from retrieving the data. One thing I forgot to add was an error message to tell me when I don't have sufficient permission to do something. Adding a message could have just saved me a lot of time :/

With the recommendation of some from here I went ahead and set up the Material Theme on my IntelliJ and I have to say, looks pretty sweet!

Life(naive_person) {
While(lesson not learnt) {
Change characters;
Repeat story;
}
Return dead_person;
}

Build pipelines are awesome. What's not awesome is forgetting the 'pipeline' bit.

Sure, let's have each TeamCity job in the 'pipeline' build the deployable from different places! You must manually merge your code from dev to test to release.

What's that? The functionality working in dev isn't there in production? I wonder how that happened.

If not understanding code, read the documentation or debug the code. When trying to modify...
1. Follow proper indentation.
2. Don't make spelling mistakes and follow naming convention.
3. Don't try to write all the code in one line (based on line length set)
4. Simplify if else statements if possible.
5. If value of method call need to be used once, don't store it in a variable. Directly use where ever it is needed.
6. If there is duplicated code, put it in separate method and re-use it if possible.

I procrastinate. Which creates more bad dev days. Rinse, repeat. #Derp

Don't know about others.. but my clients' enthusiasm is exactly the same.

On a contrast.. what I mostly end up showing them is a blank screen with "Hello World"..

And a derp face :P

Dart = Java + JavaScript

When you are learning to use network services by building a twitter app, and can't get it to work for 4 hours straight because you spelled Authorize wrong...

Universal rule of opening tickets

Me: *opens ticket on basically ANY ticketing system EVER* (could be internal, from the customer, some random bug online, anything...).

Me: writes detailed explanation of issue, because I know working on tickets is hard. Of course I include that I tried steps A, B, C, and that I haven't been able to do D because of reasons.

Ticket derp: Comments...
"Hey, have you already tried A, B, C? Also you should totally do D first."

WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? I TAKE TIME OUT OF MY FUCKING DAY TO WRITE THIS SHIT DOWN AND EVEN FORMAT IT NICELY, JUST TO MAKE YOUR MISERABLE LIFE EASIER, AND YOU DON'T EVEN READ IT YOU WORTHLESS LITTLE BALLSACK!? FUCK OFF!

I giggle a little bit every time I see a Microsoft Employee on Social Media because it's always "Derp McDerpington [MSFT]" and I ALWAYS read the "MSFT" as "Misfit"

Literally vs figuratively... That hilarious anecdote where something went derp did not cause you to literally die. You fuckwit.

<Get back to code! />

DEBUG=False

A new JavaScript framework/library released...

JS Devs: 🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️....🏃‍♂️ (towards)

Dear me, It's spelled feTCH. It's caused you like an hour between today and yesterday mispelling FETCH as feCth. Why use it at all? I mean it's there now but next time, why not use GET or REQUEST or anything that you will spell correctly 100% of the time and prevent confusion when autocomplete gets it "wrong" because "derp, fetchFoobar is defined, derp dee derp what did I do"?

It's been a long week when the target of the rant is my own dumb habits.

I did get a new keyboard but only a ding dong blames his tools. Something like that

It all starts with a variable and ends with a return value! #life

I've been developping some software so an entire debian OS gets bootstrapped and installed with all the desired software with the help of puppetlabs software...i need to prepare a server that can handle virtualization and be fast at it. So all the goodies a decent server needs, the apt, caching, networking, firewall, everything checks out... I want to test kvm virtualization... Doesn't work. Wtf? Spend a decent amount of time figuring out what the hell is wrong... I finally dzcide to think 'what if my buddy accidentally gave me a bad mobo'...

$ grep -e (vmx|ssm) /proc/cpuinfo

Nothing...

I feel so stupid to not check the mobo virtualization capabilities.

Any Telugu people here?

At work in the room full of developers coding, someone...
- "Talk to each other, why are you so quiet?"
- *No longer code, start derp-ing*

IDE: JetBrains IDEs with Material theme (Dracula)
Editor: VS Code

They are fast, amazing and beautiful while I write code.

npm install -g life

No fuck Friday

The blue screen of death

The only reason I don't like PHP is because of its $ sign.

...Shift key + dollar sign needed

I enjoy Daniel Shiffman's teaching (videos). He makes programming interesting.

Le débouchage est un procédé utilisé pour Debouchage Charleroi les drains et les canalisations. Ce processus est généralement effectué par un professionnel qui dispose des outils et de l'équipement appropriés pour effectuer le travail. Il existe de nombreux types de services de débouchage disponibles, mais ils ne sont pas tous créés égaux. Certaines entreprises peuvent offrir un prix moins cher, mais elles peuvent ne pas avoir l'expérience ou l'équipement approprié pour faire le travail correctement. Efficient Debouchage Charleroi Services est une entreprise qui propose une grande variété de services de débouchage. Ils sont en affaires depuis plus de 20 ans et ont l'expérience et l'équipement nécessaires pour bien faire le travail. Ils offrent une variété de services, y compris le nettoyage des canalisations, le nettoyage des canalisations et le nettoyage des fosses septiques. Ils offrent également une garantie de satisfaction satisfait ou remboursé afin que vous puissiez être sûr que vous serez satisfait des résultats.

my-dep.be/debouchage-charleroi/