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Well here's how I see things going:
Intel and AMD ditch their assembly architectures for Scratch, because drag and drop is very popular lately.
The Boolean is renamed to the biggot by SJW leaders for only supporting binary views.
You must first ask consent to add an item to a linked list, because forcing two items together promotes rape culture.
Apple removes the "h" and "7" keys on all laptop models and gives no reason for their actions.
Linus Torvalds grows an extra middle finger, and it still isn't enough.
Nintendo makes Mario gay and Luigi black to be more inclusive.
LG makes a curved monitor that curves away from you rather than towards you. People buy it in confusion.
Everyone makes the same ad revenue on YouTube, and it is rebranded to OurTube. Luckily, they were able to keep the color scheme.
People finally realize that machine learning is just math, and stop using it everywhere. (Just kidding lol)
AMD and Gucci merge. Nobody understands why.22 -
Dude: Come on man, Google and/or Facebook are not actively listening to us, I mean, we're not terrorists.
Me: Ok, Google
Google Asistant: How can I help you?
Dude: ._.5 -
Classes are classist.
Objects are objectifying.
Race conditions are racist.
Foreign keys are xenophobic.
Functions are ableist.
Thin clients are weightist.
Bitmasks perpetuate heteronormativity.
Code beautifiers promote unrealistic beauty expectations.
Test-driven development is victim blaming.
Forced commit pushes are rape.
Motherboards perpetuate gender roles.
And don't get me started on white space.9 -
WHY THE FUCK DOES MACOS NOT HAVE A FUCKING AUDIOMIXER TO CHANGE THE VOLUME OF DIFFERENT FUCKING APPLICATIONS.
WHY DO OPEN SOURCE ALTERNATIVES NOT WORK AND WHY THE FUCKING FUCK WOULD I PAY 10 FUCKING DOLLARS FOR AN AUDIO MIXER.
THANKS FOR THE FUCKING EAR RAPE APPLE.14 -
Less recruiter and more recruiting company.
Specifially: Robert Half.
t;ldr version:
Robert Half is scammy as hell, and they 'fired' me for quitting when my girlfriend got raped. Really.
------
Robert Half took half of my paychecks for the entire duration of my contracts with them. I didn't know right away because, as a policy, they hide how much the hiring company is paying for you, and they also forbid the company from telling you. (The company pays RHI, RHI pays you). Makes sense why they hide it because it certainly pissed me off.
Long story short, I worked for a php dev shop through them (after telling them to lower their fees or i'd walk), worked there for awhile (while remote moonlighting because why not!), and quit. I quit because my girlfriend at the time had just gotten raped, and with the emotionall fallout from that, there was no way I could focus on two jobs and be there for her. My boss understood and let me leave, though it put him in a bind.
The next day, I got a call from the regional manager of Robert Half. He was a total tool. He demanded to know if I quit, didn't care why I quit, proceeded to "educate" me in the finer points of why that was unprofessional and why i'm unemployable, accused me of lying about idr what, and finally switched into legalese to say "I regret to inform you that you can no longer consider Robert Half as a means of employment." (or something along those lines) and hung up on me. Asshole. I hope various large someones rape him so he has an inkling what it's like to be objectified and thrown away like trash.
Guy was an asshole; probably still is.
RHI was awful and scammy; probably still is, too.
Wasn't really a fan of the job either.
So at the end of it, I wasn't out anything but some patience and serenity (a lot of serenity). I kept the first (remote) job, was there for my girlfriend, and helped her through everything.
But yeah, Robert Half?
They can fucking go to hell.18 -
IBM
I have replied to them with scripts, curl commands, and Swagger docs (PROVIDED TO SUPPORT THEIR API), everything that could possibly indicate there's a bug. Regardless, they refuse to escalate me to level 1 support because "We cant reproduce the issue in a dev environment"
Well of course you can't reproduce it in a dev environment otherwise you'd have caught this in your unit tests. We have a genuine issue on our hands and you couldnt give less of a shit about it, or even understand less than half of it. I literally gave them a script to use and they replied back with this:
"I cannot replicate the error, but for a resource ID that doesnt exist it throws an HTTP 500 error"
YOUR APP... throws a 500... for a resource NOT FOUND?????????!!!!!!!!!! That is the exact OPPOSITE of spec, in fact some might call it a MISUSE OF RESTFUL APIs... maybe even HTTP PROTOCOL ITSELF.
I'm done with IBM, I'm done with their support, I'm done with their product, and I'm DONE playing TELEPHONE with FIRST TIER SUPPORT while we pay $250,000/year for SHITTY, UNRELENTING RAPE OF MY INTELLECT.11 -
Linux is sooo offensive. I think we should replace the 'sudo' command with pretty_please or something like that. What if the PC doesn't feel like executing the command? At this point, sudo-ing can be considered rape.10
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As I was walking to the store, I found yet another piece of evidence of nature rape (aka fucking nature by littering of harmful substances). Just like last time I brought it home for proper disposal.
But if I ever find the motherfucker who did this, I have a nice punishment for you. I'll knock you unconscious, drag you home, take your phone and desolder its battery. Then I'll strap a plastic bag around your stupid face, and put the battery in there while it's being shorted. Quickly it'll heat up and you'll start to turn blue with that little bag being your only oxygen source. And when that battery puffs, boy are you going to fucking gasp it all in. Hopefully that'll be poisonous enough to kill you on the spot. If not, I'll have some fun watching you die from oxygen deprivation. Or I'll jam that very same AA battery that you dropped down your throat - you choose.
Call me a psycho all you want, but what does that make you, whoever attempted to further fuck nature by uncaringly dropping a battery on the sidewalk? Oh and let's not mention the results of it - a heatwave that's been going on for over a month now. Thank you so much for bringing the place that you deserve to be in - hell!
13 -
A CMS raping WordPress so hard up the ass till there is no tomorrow. I hate that bastardized piece of fuck. “Hey I want you to fix my page and its wordpress. I pay 20 bucks.“ Well fuck you too sir. Wordpress is no cms you wanna be coders. Get back to your fucking photoshop and design something original! Every fucking wp page looks the same. Every “nice feature“ is some kind of monkeypatched workarround. No problem i set preview pictures for every post just to enable some weird slider to function.
I also love those buttfucked files with just a “require foo“ which also just requires “bar“. Drop that fuck. Implement autoloading. Nobody uses php4 anymore step into the future. “easy to learn“ fuck me and fuck you untill you vomit jizz! Clusterfucked spaghetticode thats easy, easy to put another rotten load of clusterfuck on top. Also those security features. I put an empty index.php to prevent directory traversal. N I C E! Stop using wordpress as CMS, its a blog engine. Nothing great has every been written on top of wordpress and never will. I dare you to deny everything related to it and if you are one of those designer guyd, you can gargle my jizz you fucknut!
Starting 2017 i will start a counter and rape every 10th Wordpress which gets abused as cms i encounter into oblivion on their 0,99$ webhosting shit.
Fuck this I'm so mad about that crap17 -
What kind of cum gargling gerbil shelfer stores and transmits user passwords in plain text, as well as displays them in the clear, Everywhere!
This, alongside other numerous punishable by death, basic data and user handling flaws clearly indicate this fucking simpleton who is "more certified than you" clearly doesn't give a flying fuck about any kind of best practice that if the extra time was taken to implement, might not totally annihilate the company in lawsuits when several big companies gang up to shower rape us with lawsuits over data breaches.
Even better than that is the login fields don't even differentiate between uppercase or lowercase, I mean WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK DO YOU SELF RIGHTEOUS IGNORANT CUNTS THINK IS GOING TO HAPPEN IN THIS SCENARIO?13 -
Just a friendly reminder that when you hear one or more of the following:
- underrepresented
- identity politics
- *phobia
- toxic *ity
- cis* (though "cisco" is fine)
- diversity
- culture appropriation
- passive-aggressive
- patriarchy
...and other bullshit, feel free to not talk to that person ever again. You'll miss nothing. Always remember that their goal is not equality but power to oppress whoever have a different worldview.
If you fear twitter backlash, fear not. Political shit comes and goes, but the inherent value of what you do is here to stay and means something at all times.
To anyone who wants to judge me because of this — remember, what you have read above comes from a bipolar transgender bisexual rape victim.
38 -
Let's portray Stallman as a malevolent criminal, dying on the creepiest hill, shall we? Apparently there's even people that make statements such as "if you defend RMS, you're just as terrible as he is".
Do you have any idea what you're talking about? Do you have any idea what the case even is?
Richard Stallman has a controversial opinion about a rape case committed by someone else. Gee, what a shocker, people have opinions. Does that make Stallman a criminal himself?
Oh but he's representing open source software. That's why he can't be there.
Oh yeah. Shunning him (and erroneously so) as another Reiser is gonna make open source look so good, isn't it.
"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it."
- Evelyn Beatrice Hall, writer of Voltaire
People are entitled to any opinion they may have. Just because you disagree with it (and in this case I do too!) does not mean that it can be used to criminalize someone and to ruin their career. That is just wrong.24 -
When I started university, I was getting out of some really awful situations-- emotionally abusive parents, a boyfriend who was blackmailing me, a truly bizarre rape, etc. My life had been a little rough, and I was dealing with some PTSD.
My first computer science course was great. The professor was clear, patient, everything a sensitive student needed. I was able to concentrate on the curriculum without any problems.
The second 'intermediate' course, though? Not so much. The professor shouted his lectures during the entire class period in a relatively small classroom. Occasionally, he would clasp his hands and move around pretty unpredictably (like jumping out at the class), which spooked me a few times. He also always seemed like he was just hovering on the edge of madness, like he was just barely keeping it together, but he never broke.
I sat in the front row and was absolutely terrified during his lectures because it seemed like he was mad at me. I was half expecting him to start attacking me at any moment. Because, you know, PTSD.
I was also only getting a comp sci minor, so the other students looked at me like I wasn't supposed to be there, which also made me feel pretty uncomfortable, but such is life.
After most classes with him, I would need to take about an hour or two afterwards to calm down, stop shaking, and recompose myself. I looked forward to test days because he wouldn't yell. It was rough.
Later on, I learned that he used to be a gym teacher, which explains the jumping and yelling. Also, his wife, daughter, and dog all died within six months of each other the year prior, which might explain why he always seemed so on edge.3 -
FUCK LINUX
now that I have your attention, and you’re probably angry, too, please, even if you don’t read this rant, never use code.org again. now, onto the rant…
god dammit, code.org sucks. I mean, anyone who created it or associates with it should, well, be considered a terrorist. they’re bombing students futures in computer science with false, useless, bullshit information. not to mention, their sponsors like bill gates, mark zuckerburg, and other rich asses, talk in a video about some boring ass shit that is hard to understand for anyone who doesn’t program, and not to mention, they use a fucking five dollar microphone. ear rape. even if you look at a textual version of it, then read the information on it, it’s practically useless because it's so terribly explained, and also useless. ironically enough, they focus on their animations more than their actual explinations, or their students for that matter. the fact that we had to encode a picture in binary, made me about 50% dumber, give or take a 0 or 1. then, we had to do it in hex, which wasn’t really much better, although more realistic I supposed. what's really the most depressing thing about this class is its application in the real world. I've learnt nothing whatsoever that will help me in the real world, or in computer science. I suppose there's two things that may be useful (that I already knew): hex, and that TCP doesn't lose packets. that's it. those two things. five seconds worth of knowledge from the first quarter of the year. the ideas just make me want to throw up. teaching the main ideas of computer science without actually teaching it? one of the teachers (probably a good one) enrolled her students in an online programming course just so they could understand, because the explanations are just so terrible. this is the only [high school] computer science course offered by code.org, and I signed up because it's an AP computer science class (tried to get into AP Java, the day I was supposed to take the test to get into an upper level class, I was told it didn't count as a tech credit). seriously, fuck code.org. it makes you dumber. their 'app lab' environment is pointless, just like everything else. the app lab is basically where you have a set of commands and have to make a dog bark() or a storm trooper miss() [and that's hell when they haven't introduced while loops yet]. the app lab is literally code.org going out of their way to make everything that their students are learning pointless in the real world. seriously, why can't we just use a <canvas> like an ACTUAL PROGRAMMER would do if they were to make a browser game, not use an app engine so slow it would be faster to update windows and android studio each time I run an 'app' in their 'environment'. their excuse is that the skills "transfer over" to the real world. BITCH! IF I DIDN'T KNOW JAVA, AND I WANTED TO MAKE A GAME IN JAVA, I'M NOT GOING TO LEARN PYTHON, THEN "TRANSFER" THE SKILLS I LEARNT, I'M GOING TO LEARN FUCKING JAVA. AND THAT GOES FOR EVER OTHER LANGUAGE, PROJECT, ETC.
I'm begging you code.org, stop, get help.9 -
There's this guy who randomly make sexual remarks. Not the usual guy's talk kind sexual remarks, but more of "I am going to rape this girl infront of her boyfriend and her father " kind of remark. Also he sexual harassed women coworker like take video of them in the toilet.
What we did was gathering every rape case possible (which is not related to him, but somehow the victims don't know who the rapists were) , all the evidence of him taking nude video of girls and report to police . We launch the statement that "maybe" the rapist was this phallus.
And the authorities got his arse and tracked. Well he asked for it.
Always remember "with great power of boasting bullshit, comes with a fat shit of consequences". The difference between the actual Spiderman and this phallus is that Spiderman think with his senses and shoot webbings from his wrist, but this phallus don't have any actual thought involve and shoot webbings from his micropenis.
I resigned after that.15 -
FUCKING GODDAMN TIZONIA RANDOMLY RESETTING MY FUCKING VOLUME TO MAX ADSFJAIETWANKNGBAIWOUFJHSLDÅKG3
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Life is hard.
You are born. DNA gets determined. You go through infancy.
Puberty comes and DNA is like
"uh from now you'll pretty much have strong sexual urges, a huge desire to be sexually prolific, nothing weird like being pedo or into rape though".
me: Uh ok.
dna: oh, also, you're gonna be one of those late bloomers, you know, you talk like shit, you dress like shit, you smell like shit.
life: that's true and also you don't have anyone in your life to teach you about that shit, so forget about kissing, having sex, let alone being in a relationship for a long time.
*a lot of years go by with a lot of missed opportunities, mistakes and regrets*
life: ok, you seem to have become a decent sex partner out of a lot of scarring experiences, but there's one problem: you've fallen in love with somebody.
and you're married
and you have kids
me: well, does that mean I can't fuck other people?
life: yeah, no. I'm surprised I even have to explain that, it's called cheating. It will pretty much ruin your marriage, and fuck up your kids.
me: ok, I guess no then. I'm still fortunate enough to have sex with my wife right?
life: yeah... but you still want to fuck other people
me: what???
life: yeah, did you think that falling in love would make you not want to fuck other people? fuck no
me: ok, well I'm very grateful that I get to experience sex at all.
life: yes... there's a thing though, your partner has a much much lower libido than you.
me: ok, well maybe if I exercise and dress better that might change
life: that will definitely help, you'll feel more confident and have more stamina, but every time you retry exercising, you remember how much you hate it and how little stamina you have.
oh, I'm sorry, I forgot you had kids and work, yeah no time or energy for that.
me: ok, then should I just embrace a more liberal lifestyle, like becoming a swinger?
life: ha, fat chance, it's a very taboo thing and you're not that liberal, neither is she.
me: uhhh, i guess i can sometimes watch porn then...
life: watching porn regularly will make the only sex that you have worse, according to statistics.
me: ok, I guess I should get ripped18 -
I’m about to quit this job, this customer don’t care about the people, they just want quick results and people available 24/7, this is taking my mental health, I think I’ll become a farmer instead.3
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What the fuck??!?!?
I wanna say :-
Fuck!!! What the fuck a sex robot is?!?? Fuck???
Lets leave this planet here humans are thinking to make a sex robot(fuck! ) who can say no fuck?!?!?! Later they will file rape case for humans who tried to force their robot. FUCKING FUCK BRAINS?!?!?
Full answer: -
A lot of ethicists and psychologists think that yes, they should learn to say no. Here is an interesting article about it:
Should We Program Sex Robots to Give Consent?
I agree with Kate Darling, Ph.D., a research specialist and robot-human interaction expert at MIT Media Lab, told Inverse in a discussion about Westworld, when she says she isn’t concerned about the robots, but with human behavior.
However, when I’ve expressed these feelings on Quora, about this controversy I was downvoted and my answer collapsed because people got offended that I made the claim that an object (the robot) could be ‘raped,’ even after I clarified exactly what I meant by that- that no you cannot rape an object, but just as an object cannot consent, you may be enacting ‘rape’ or torture fantasies, etc., on the robot. I think I was downvoted because my point of view wasn’t exactly what they wanted to hear, was too blunt, and the people who downvote opinions that may look more negatively at the sex robot industry typically aren’t feminists in the slight.
It seems a lot of people want the right to use sex robots and also that a lot of people haven’t really thought about it too deeply. Some people say that the robots will relieve women from sex work or protect people from sexual assault, I think these are very bold claims. Some people compare the sex robots to vibrators or other masturbation tools, but this is simply not accurate because sex robots are designed to be much more. They are marketed as companions that do not cry, nag, etc. People that own them often may dress them, tie them up, have marriage ceremonies, etc., a lot more activities than they would if it was a simple masturbation tool.
5 -
Wtf is all this talk of AI regulation all of the sudden? We have barely achieved anything on AI and they already wanna put chaines on it?
Just because people are pussies who are afraid that skynet will develop rape-robots who go around giving std's to everybody they see doenst mean there should be regulations on something thats still in diapers.
ESPECIALLY WHEN ITS PROBABLY GOING TO BE DONE BY FUCKING POLITICIONS WHO PROBABLY THINK AI ONLY MEANS KILLER ROBOTS.5 -
WARNING: There is a dangerous malware out in the wild, and chances are, you have it installed on your computer.
It's called Windows Update, and it is marketed as a software that "delivers security patches to your PC". Wrong. What it actually does is hard-reboot your computer at randomly picked time intervals without asking for your consent, or even showing any type of warning, basically deleting all unsaved progress that you've made in your programs or games. It also deletes/undoes all registry tweaks that you might have made (e.g. to the context menu), it deletes your nvidia display configurations, uninstalls any custom themes that you might have installed, possibly even downloads another malware disguised as "Microsoft Edge" and shoves it in your face on next boot without giving a possibility to close it. Oh and it might also make your computer unbootable so you have to go to the advanced recovery settings to fix it manually.
Yes, everything I just mentioned above happened to me about an hour ago. This LITERALLY classifies the software as a malware (Google: "software that is specifically designed to disrupt, damage, or gain unauthorized access to a computer system"). If we throw in all the data collection that happens without your consent, Microsoft actually manages to check not only one, but all three boxes in the "malware" definition.
Pleas, stop using microshit, and switch to linux as soon as possible if you can.24 -
So there's a new team member in the project (me & him), he's assigned to make the frontend, which is great since I'm so proficient doing back. But he starts by doing backend tasks and the fucking frontend which is the most delayed part of the project is still untouched.2
-
Class DonaldTrump extends Shit implements Asshole {
public final boolean PRESIDENT = false;
public final String THINKING = "bullshit";
public void talk () {
System.out.println(THINKING);
}
}1 -
Didn't use windows for over a decade but my refurbished x270 came with it and damn.. They f-ing raped the f outta it. Every action has a kinda lag, nothing is instant. I saw that on my dad's laptop too and thought it was the HD. And why the f can't I smash ctrl+alt+del at boot anymore? It just f-ing ignores. Took a lot of attempts before i found out how to boot from usb. I would not for any $$$ work on windows anymore. Thank God .Net core exists for linux and works great9
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No one will understand me but you Devs.
I am a self taught developer who works in a digital marketing agency, when I was learning to code I wanted that the code I will produce will help people and make me happy, the only job i got is in digital marketing agency, because no one in my country will recrute a self taught bald ugly mid thirty fucker, then want them young and fresh, anyway, I proved that I can handle the job, so that I became the only dev in the agency.
the problem is that I reached a that checkpoint where I have to choose a path:
- I learned Node and React but I can't use them in my agency
- I work with wordpress and prestashop but I don't code, I use fucking theme forest templates
the only way to work with MERN is through remote, but I am not a senior yet, I only have to keep learning PHP but I can't advance in my current job since the projects don't require coding, and I feel that my agency will close the dev department because they put me in the designers office.
I don't want to reach 40 with nothing in my portfolio but shitty theme forest template rape, the stress from my current situation is killing me, I can't even start working on my portfolio website and blog because I can't think straight, my mind jump from "today I will build an api" to "no I need to build a custom wordpress theme" each 3 minutes, I don't sleep, the futur is dark, I am afraid that if I focus on wordpress and shit I will miss working in interesting projects, and if I focus on MERN I will never gain experience localy to become a full remote later.
many will agree with me that PHP is shitty but gets the work done, and I hate PHP because of prestashop, and we only live once, the only other job I found require wordpress and fucking prestashop, imagine living a live doing something you don't like, then die regretting every decision you make.
I might sound crazy for you, but I don't have many friends and I am an introvert working with designers and community managers ... so this is the only place I can write what I want.
if you reached here, I thank you for your time4 -
Code FUCKING Rape!!! that kids is when companies throw lots of creative and talented programmers / coders / developers at a system and say FIX IT!
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"Architect"(A) - Hey, StrucN, we have a bit of a problem on the module you are working on (which the previous "developers" seem to have given it roofies)
Me: Okay, what seems to be the problem?
A: There is a need to add some functionality to it, we need you to ...
Me: I see, well it can be done but it wouldn't be so simple - the module is a mess and the change would need to be well tested
A: I fear the clients deadline is for tomorrow
Me: Well he'll have to wait, rushing it is the worst possible option
A: I'll talk to him about it, thanks
After around half an hour A rushes back
A: Hey I passed a ticket to you about the additions we spoke about, it should be ready for tomorrow
Me: It won't be ready, it's too complex to complete is in such a shirt notice (considering it's already the end of the day and all the changes need to be pushed tommorow to prod)
A: I know *programmer from useless team B* did something similar so as it is close to what we need you should copy it.
My inner voice: FUCK YOU YOU USELESS FUCKING CUNT! THERE SHOULDN'T BE ANY COPY PASTE SHIT FROM SOME UNRELATED MODULE! YOU SHIT STAINED MEAT BAG ALREADY DID SUCH A SIN IN THE PAST AND I HAD TO FIX ALL OF IT. THE MODULE SHOULDN'T SUFFER ANY MORE AS IT IS ALREADY A GODDAMN RAPE VICTIM!
WHERE DID PROPER PROFESSIONALISM WENT? WHY IS IT THE INDUSTRY FILLED WITH STUPID WANNA BE "ARCHITECTS" WHILE OTHER MORE COMPETENT FOLK SHOULD ALWAYS BE IGNORED BECAUSE IT'S ALWAYS SHOULD BE READY FOR TOMMOROW?!
For fucks sake I miss my old Architect, he could really understand the essence of program development3 -
So the next O’rly book I can imagine for this project is:
How did I ended in this microservices nightmare?2 -
I think my favorite MacBook Pro™ with touch bar feature is when I'm changing the volume while listening to music, and the bar bugs ou- ahem, decides that I actually want to listen at max volume, and proceeds to rape my ears.
If only Tim Cook were here, and would grace my humble existence by allowing me to pleasure him with my mouth. It is moments like these that make me feel truly blessed to be an Apple chosen one.2 -
Medium before:
How to perfectly manage a reactive server with 4 frameworks blindfolded
Medium now:
THAT'S WHY YOU SHOULD BE SCARED OF AI
AI WILL KILL US AND RAPE OUR WIVES
YOU ARE USING CHATGPT WRONG!!
DON'T WAIT AI TO STEAL YOUR JOB, KILL YOURSELF NOW5 -
MOCHA YOU FUCKING BITCH, THERE IS A DONE() CALLBACK BEING CALLED IN THIS TEST, WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM??? I WILL RAPE YOUR FUCKING SOURCE CODE. But really mocha test, why u no work so we can both move on with our lives 😣😦😞7
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The videoconference started and I had no shirt on, fortunately there was only one guy and he laughed but understood haha15
-
Which fucking idiot thought it was a good idea to give adds the right to go and bust your fucking eardrums out of the blue. Like, I'll be sitting here playing a mobile game with my earphones in that has like little to no sound and out of nowhere some fucking add just goes BANG BANG BANG BANG as if my phone's volume is on max volume and put through an amplifier just to fucking rape my ears.
I GOT NEWS TO EVERY ONE THAT THIBKS THIS IS A GOOD IDEA:
NOBODY FUCKING LIKES YOU AND I HOPE YOU BURN IN A FIRE THAT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SOUND IN A PADDED ROOM WHERE SOUND IS NOT A THING -
Fucking telecom and their shady ways of providing "service". Don't even need to consider paying for porn sites when my isp comes along with its own, overpriced service to fuck a customer in every way possible.
Probably other providers as well, but for now I'm fucking pissed at them because they already scammed my grandmother twice, when it comes to internet speed, probably because they thought she wouldn't notice either way.
My grandmother's residence can receive up too 200mbps, so she got a plan according to that. Installation of the router was included as a one time fee.
This is where they first scammed her, imo. They installed a router, that can route 100mbps at max. At first I though she got a plan for that speed.
An elder telecom technician, who was investing a completely irrelevant issue, switched it out for one than can handle uo to 1tbps. He had no obligation to do so and he didn't charge anything.
Seriously, probs to that one guy. He openly stated that telecoms pulls off this scam and switched it for free, since they have many of routers lying around anyways (I wonder why 🤔🤔🤔)
Anyways, guy switched out the router and BAMM! from ~80mbps to ~170, iirc.
Fast forward a couple of months I notice internet speed is capped out at 76mpbs. Capped out way to perfectly, to just blame the cable. But obviously the guys over at customer support do exactly that.
Calls telecom: "yeah, your contact only goes up to 100, 76 because of the cable. You need to pay extra to get up to 176".
Excuse me, what the fuck did you just say, shit nugget? We should pay extra for something you contest from us?
Yo, Mister ChromosomOverflow, don't think that relaying the responsibility to another number to call will put you out of the fucking shit you tried to pull off.
Edit: The contract states up to 1000, 200 or 100mpbs download depending on what the cables allow and in case of 200 there's 100mbps upload, but we also get capped out there at 20. I wish these fucker one gang rape per non-received mpbs2 -
I’ve gave my two week notice a week ago, and my boss it’s just avoiding to announce it to the team, people in other areas, and of course to the teammates that will take my responsibilities. What’s wrong with him? He asked me not to tell people so they can “elaborate a plan to make my exit softer for the team” and that’s great but dude, I have one week left and people is still asking me for things that I’ll not handle in a week, I feel sad about the guy that will take that shot.4
-
Javascript days are counted... I've been away from the dev world for a little bit and instead of writing bugs I've been invested in reading news portals and checking on fucking frameworks...
Web Assembly its gaining traction and projects like Blazor are already showing its potential... I cant wait for things be v1, in any case... fucking Javascript its soon to be "that fucking shit we use to use".
No one truly likes javascript, and if you do like it you are probably the kind of person who like to rape babies anyway.8 -
I really need to vent this out. I don't know if the person I chatted last night is in some danger or not.
I recently got to know her and I had plans to collaborate on some projects with her.
She messaged me asking for a solution to a bug she faced and I was trying help her figure it out.
As I suggested a solution for her to try, she decided it was time for her to take her little dog to walk and told me she will check it right and let me know right after coming from walk.
It was already late in the night and I mentioned it to her. She responded like it was usual thing for her to go for dog walk at night but I'm kind of worried now since the city she lives in is infamously known as the rape capital.
She hasn't seen the last message I sent and there is no reason for her to keep me in the dark.
I had a hard time not being able to sleep because of my mind thinking of the worst case scenarios.
I don't know I'm just being too paranoid or if I should get someone to check on her.
I really hope she is back home and simply forgot to message me or something.13 -
I just love working with this other company!
Their projects are fucking complicated, but still doable, they entertain me
But most of all, the examples they make are just awesome!
Like now I'm developing a CRM for a small clinic and there was an issue like "what are notes for?"
Reply:
"The patient is showily homosexual, remember to ask for his HIV exams after his next visit"
Other examples:
Q: "what happens during the visit?"
A: "the patients comes in, the receptionist will hand over a tablet with some questions like how deep his asshole is, then proceeds to to doctor office and there he will be raped for 30m, during the rape the doctor will take note of how destroyed his anus is, and will proceed to prepare a therapy"
Q: "I see there's the requirement for attachments"
A: "yeah once they get into the doctor room, they will be asked stuff like feet pictures to let the doctors jerk off later at night, but also PDFs about exams or some kind of stuff like that"
Q: "Will the staff be able to notify one another about random shit?"
A: "They're 3 people in like 40 square meters, so they might as well just shout 'hey, I shit myself bc there's no more toilet paper', they're close enough to hear one another"
---
I'm sorry in advance if you feel offended by any part of this4 -
"New facebook dating service! It's absolutely free! Just sign this user agreement and durable power of attorney. We promise we won't rape you with it later. "
It's a joke now, but probably not for much longer. -
Remember how I made script to change brightness with keyboard shortcuts? https://devrant.com/rants/1845183/...
Well, after 2 days of complaining why the fuck this shit does not work anymore, I figured out I deleted it...also from trash.... OH, FUCK!!!3 -
MG...
Found out that I had apple music for free for months.
Now I only have until the end of the year to get alllll the CDs I ever wanted legally.
Already spend 5gb in two days... Let's see if it's really unlimited...
After the end of the year, unsubscrive. Worst experience after installing the app, Apple wants to know everything about me, shares my Playlist without asking... (just 10 minutes arround definitions, still abusive for a premium service).
Fuck Apple abusive policies, thank you for the opportunity to rape Apple without pay.
Space oddity by David Bowie, finding so many songs I forgot I love...2 -
Windows users be like "Oh, it's fine. Our tent comfortably fits all my family and it's cold there for only half a year, but not too cold, just wear a coat while you're inside and you'll be fine. Clean water is only two miles away, walking is healthy after all. Yes, agents come every week and rape my wife but it only happens to newbs and honestly I respect that ritual, this is how life works. You only have to send three papers to them to ask them please not to rape us this week and they don't come for a whole week! I ain't stupid, I always carry my gun with me to shoot thugs"
Living with MacOS is just living. You pay the fee and they let you in.
Living with Linux can be just living too, but it can be much more, your skill and willingness to learn are always rewarded. I've been there, I used Arch.
But living with windows is always survival.18 -
I’d like to have a DevRant dataset so I can make some great visualizations, text analysis, etc. of the things we hate the most. This is top priority, thanks in advance.5
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Thank to ddcutil, now I don't have to rape my monitors buttons every time I need to change brightness. Nice!5
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Email: "Thanks for applying to this position, after you complete this technical test, please let us know via email."
Me: Dude! I didn't even apply for that position, stop spamming 😒3 -
Customer: The quality of the software you’re delivering is going down
Me: That’s because we’re developers, support, and spend all day on meetings without mentioning that deadlines are defined by you, not the technical team
Project Manager: I have added more members to the team so you can deliver faster
Me: That’s just slowing us down because this inherited code is shit, there’s no documentation and we’re always in a rush, without time for a proper ramp up
Customer: *throws money to our faces* I’ll remove two weeks to this delivery so we can test it better
Me: …2 -
At this point I fucking hate my project. After 3 months I literally can not concentrate, I am just staring on a screen, smashing my hands on the keyboard and praying that it will fucking work without bugs. At this point it still works pretty well. I am so sorry for everyone that will have to work on this after I leave. According to the project leader it should not take more than 20 more hours. Hes a really cool guy, but if he's going to talk optimistically about this fucking project once more I am gonna rape his wife and his dog. Last fucking time he said that its just 2 already implemented features that just need to get connected together, I spent 30 hours rewriting half of the codebase because how inconsistent and shitty the code was. I am not fuckin suprised that we are going to rewrite whole shit from a scratch, because the code is already unmaintainable. Wish me luck, because I really need it to survive another week working on this trash.1
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What the fuck is this trend of pricing cloud services by the minute? I mean It's fucking great and all that I buy 2 minutes with a sql db but who the fuck actually does that?
After another night working on a server I (strongly) suggest we move our shit to a cloud service. It's cool providing I promise the costs don't rape us blind folded. Seems easy enough, right? Nope it's not.
6 hours later, halfway to becoming a fucking network engineer and I'm more lost than ever.
Seriously can't the fuck AWS and google cloud show a monthly price - even an estimate for generic shit like $x for the average crappy wp blog!
If anyone has some helpful info / experience on the true cost of hosting generic web apps - the retardedly simple app I'm trying to price is:
1 php web application with 150 domains, 3gb mysql db and 30gb ssd.
I gets has 45000 sessions with 250000 page views.
Your help would be greatly appreciated. Currently I'm leaning towards deploying a clone sending 250 000 random requests and praying my $300 cloud platform credit will cover the bill.4 -
I worked 2012-2016 for a big telco company in my country and there was this HTTPS webpage with an iframe rendering any url you passed over the ?url query param plus a header with the company's logo.
I was on a meeting with some friends in charge of social media and they found it for a user report.
Unbelievable 🤷🏻♂️ I remember I tried the page's url itself and it rendered a loop of the header with the company's logo 😂 -
That meeting where everybody apoints the mistakes of the organization and how nobody was going to do a shit about it.
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I MISS TIGERDIRECT! a haiku&rant
Tiger, so direct
Hardware haven, my tech friend
Killed, by poor Insight
I thought I had found ways to cope with it all... became a cert'd refurbisher at enough lesser operations to rebuild some semblance of my hardware connects. I even resorted to newegg to fill small voids... why is it so hard to find a quickly shipping, scriptable, 2 WAN in 6+ channels out, non WiFi noob crap, router... or even an L3 managed switch for <250$ not tied to some bullshit excuse for network management like a "cloud management platform" with some rando 'security' bloat?!?! Not even trying to force the PoE functionality (realistically i know I'll just wire that up myself after procrastinating too long)... i even tried newegg and damn amazon, neither seem to realise that real routers and switches arent interchangeable terms.
I even tried tolerating supporting the murderous, treasonous, obfuscating high prices and insisting you register as your business and let them trap you in the equivalent of a 'free' ski trip, with "short" timeshare presentation.
All bullshit and overpriced af trying to force some bloat down your throat so you "feel" like you're properly managing a network.
Anyone have an ace up their sleeve? For quick delivery (USA) minus bloat, pandering and ass-to-mouth rape???
I even tried stooping to a current Cisco OEM!
I mean, if it was *only* a bit of ass rape, I'm fine with that... but the bloat, pandering and shit-stained lollipop...
I'd rather just disappear from valid business obligations, get somewhat intoxicated, and hyperfocus tear apart my tech graveyards, go ghetto apocalyptic tech macgyver on that shit and emerge days later low on solder, in dire need of a flintstones size whetstone, more arduinos, a tetanus shot and a shower.1 -
I was discussing something about git today with a colleague and then it hit me. Git push --force is like rape. You don't want to push? I'll force you to😂
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Hey guys. I am in a situation where I need to decide wether to take on a new project or not. And if not, how to turn down that client so that I would not burn any bridges. So I need your opinions on this matter in order to make the final decision.
To make things clear heres some background info. 10 months ago I quitted my fulltime position in another EU country and went back to my own home country. 10 months forward till today and I have my own ltd company which currently has 5 projects. Its doing pretty well money wise. All projects combined, I already earn more then I ever did and I need to work max 10 hours a week since all projects are remote projects so I dont waste time on useless meetings and etc. However I dont feel fulfilled or challenged anymore because surprise surprise doing well paid projects doesnt guarante your sense of fulfillment.
So I noticed that I have lots of spare time which I spend diving into rabbitholes with hobby projects. I decided that its time to scale my company and take on more projects and maybe even hire more people.
So I started searching for other projects I could work on (prefferibly remote projects or flexible ones where I could come in 2-3 days a week in office and work remotely rest of the week). Reason being that I am already out of sync with fulltime position lifestyle and I am totally result oriented, not punch in my hours and go home oriented.
For exampleIf i get my weekly tasks I prefer to do them in 1-2 days (even if it requires doing double shifts which rarely but happens) but then I want to have rest of the week off. Thats how my brain works and thats how Im wired. I cant stand fulltime positions especially in enterprise bigger companies where I come in and do maybe 2 hours of actual work everyday because of all useless meetings and blockers from backend/etc. Its soul crushing to me.
So I posted linkedin ads and started searching for new clients/projects. One month ago I went to an interview for an android project in a startup.
The project looked interesting enough. Main task was to rewrite their android app from java to kotlin. Apparently their current current app was built by a backend developer who wants to focus solely on backend.
So during the interview they showed me their app which was quite simple frontend wise but not so simple backend wise from what I was able to figure out.
Their project lead (also a backed guy) asked me my estimation of price and completion of task. I told them maybe 2-3 months to do everything properly.
Project lead was basically shocked because all other candidates told him they can rewrite the app from java to kotlin in 2-3 weeks. I told him that everything is possible but his app quality will suffer and for a better estimation he would we would need to sign an NDA so I could evaluate the costs. So we ended the interview.
After that we kept in touch for one month (it took them one month to google a generic NDA and sign it digitally with me).
So heres the redflags I noticed:
1. They dont respect my time. Wasted 1 month of my time and after signing NDA gave me 2days to estimate their project and go to a meeting and give them detailed info about what I can offer. I thats not a brain rape then I dont know what it is
2. They are changing initial conditions we talked about. We agreed on rewriting the codebase and be done with it. Now they prefer a fulltime worker who would be responsible for android app as his own product. So basically project lead was not able to find a fulltime dev so now hes trying to convert me (a company owner) to his fulltime worker.
3. Lack of respect. During the interview he started speaking in his own native language to me with some expression (he seemed pissed off at that moment when he switched languages).
4. Bad culture fit. As I said Im used to relaxed clients and projects where I dont need to be chained to a desk a monitored and be micromanaged. I mean lets sign a contract give me access to your codebase and tell me what to do, I will produce results and lets be done with it.
5. Project lead is a backend guy who doesnt understand how complicated android apps can be. No architecture and no unit tests are in his frontend app. He doesnt care about writing proper app since he ships it in his own device so he doesnt need to worry about supporting custom devices or different api levels of android and etc. But not having any architecture? Cmon.
So basically I am confused. Project lead needs a fulltime dev but hes in contact with me in hopes that I would sign a fulltime contract. But how I can work fulltime if all what I can see are redflags?
Basicaly I thinkthis was a misundersanding. Im searching for fulltime remote projects and hes offering fulltime inhouse projects. Project lead never outsourced so hes confused as well.
As you can see decision is already basically made to turn him down, I just need to know how to tell him to fck off in the most polite manner and thats it.6 -
When you have to follow bad practices and practically fuck yourself because of short deathlines that your boss decided without you.
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Now I have to make updates in three different tools about the projects I’m working on, this is stupid since we work for a tech company and we shouldn’t be using fucking Power Point to update statuses on projects. Management should be making other’s life easier not harder. 🥸1
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I'm so excited about containerization and also ML. I think those are my biggest nerdgasm stories at the time. So please share some useful resource to learn, I will do it as well :)2
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Every fucking time I execute a program I’m popped up with yet another motherfucking update available, then after I wait for the fucking download to finish and the install to proceed I have to ‘voluntarily’ restart the system… and guess what? Windows needs to update now!!! AH! Fucking cocksuckers… If that can compare to harassment was Firefox does its plain old gang bang rape as it now forces the fucking updates.
I remember a time not long ago (I’m not that old motherfuckers) when the only update was a fucking major update namely one that allow software to either run on a new OS or work at all. Not a goddamned typo fix on the about page… FUCK OFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!2 -
Dude, this two guys working on my team are really jerks. They don’t want to “waste time” helping the junior devs understanding the stuff that we sell. Sadly they’re the only people on the team that didn’t come from the outside.2
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Is there actually any frontend framework or boilerplate to just code and avoid messing around with old libraries, missing dependencies, no documentation? I'm seriously moving to plain ES6, it feels more flexible :/1
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80% of the costs for this POC comes from NAT gateways, so keep your VPCs internet access free until you really need it 😅2
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Got this build project of a big customer for the company I work for. Zero documentation and the guy manages this is on vacation and this customer is pushing and I'm on leave too until Monday, so everything is fine on x-mas eve 🎄
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so i'm sitting here staring inwardly at the learning rate optimizer...
i think it works
but i find myself wanting to scream at the nuances of the method being hidden from me
I know its probably fairly simple.
i want to write my own.
i want to plot neat graphs that give me metrics at the learning results for each epoch showing how much closer the values are getting to the training data some neat spiral of values and lines and flashy too.
but i feel.
...welll
strangely lackluster and a tad paralyzed for some reason. partly because it feels like i've done this all before... sigh.
on the topic of things I already did.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...
can you believe they made this bullshit into A TV SHOW ? IN THIS WEIRD ASS HYPERSENSITIVE ENVIRONMENT ? THIS RAPE WEIRDOS WET DREAM ? 5 SEASONS AT LEAST.
GOD WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY ? ITS EITHER ADULT MEN WATCHING RUGRATS OR THIS SHIT !2 -
Hello my dear friend. I hate you. You are asking me why? You know exactly why.
I'm fucking tired with dealing with your fucking projects. Yeah, your unresponsive websites projects. You shove me a website, with crapton of images, JavaScript fireworks and you even dare to ask why website is lagging on mobile?
Also I hate you for ugly, custom fonts without Polish letters and you fucking are mad at me why some letters look different?
Last thing. If you ever again ask me why a website (look again at projects you are giving to me) is looking different on mobile, then I swear I will fucking rape you. (but maybe I will maybe kill you instead) -
I really love this boilerplate for starting an Angular, gulp, browserify web app. https://github.com/jakemmarsh/...
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Stuck between should I finish this repetitive code now or should I spend time to make it more DRY. Either way, it consumes time.1
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Set — half-flooded city. Despite streets being three feet underwater, and, of course, filled with jellyfish, the city doesn’t seem to care. People go to work as usual. The protagonist is a special agent. His target is to find “the drain” and flush the water from the city. His enemies want to flood the city even more and are hiding “the drain”. Characters are almost silent. For the entire movie, only two lines are heard: “Where is the drain?” and “Jellyfish are everywhere, not just in the sea”. The soundtrack is an endless loop of “As he lost his mind,”, a line from Black Sabbath’s “Iron Man”. 30% of screen time is gruesome killings, torture and rape. 20% of the remaining time are long jellyfish sceneries. At some point, the protagonist notices the camera and kills the director. After that,2
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We are in a course for the scrum certifiaction. Most of my partners are more concerned about they can't take the decission about using scrum or not. Is so sad because os a really small organization.
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You know what I hate ? All this creepy shit they altered everything into once the thick glass wearing ugly freaks started showing up. All the unpleasantness and unhappiness and creepy things only someone who was stopping a few minutes to murder or rape someone or get fucked by a dog would like. Feel free to take them this content don't want to be around it and I'm sick of it2
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For fucks sake, why can't Microsoft switch to Lua or JS as an embedded language instead of VBA.
It bad enough working with their office-jank but having program in this butt-rape of a language takes the cake.8 -
Dear Thieves.
So I was looking at some guy who's job I designed today.
He was sitting there with the new laptop I bought during one visit here.
It was an hp with a silver keyboard and handrest because supposedly normal people stopped owning laptops when you all decided to embrace schizophrenia and create inane rather stupid meanings that are associated with literally everything but sense or sophistication.
comparing oneself to an animal for example doesn't focus on positive or spiritual values, its something perverse.
ordering food is not about enjoying new things or savoring flavors, its about something perverse.
going to school is not to learn things, its to crash and burn later because the powers that be refuse to update the system from the 1970s.
living, is not living at all, but working to pay bills and get old bitter and fat.
well.
shit.
retards.
anyway. doesn't explain people like myself who made things when we could and were enthusiastic about our jobs at points.
oh. and supposedly the guy who stole the job was 'I".... and it was a job that would become 'outmoded'......
i believe that was the word often used. let;s check. yup, close enough.
then all these people talking about 'new' jobs because noone could trust the group of monsters they made with too much spare time. since you know. they thought it was funny to steal human beings lives since they were not human. subhuman.
anyway.
where suddenly everything meant something else and a whole new world of retarded people emerged from the shadows because the trash children of a former generation got sick of being lectured about morality when they were in fact just bad people who should have been shot.
i don't care how else the whiney bastards explain themselves. i really don't.
you can say that in desperate fucked situations involving psychological torture, rape, etc that a decent person *raises their hand* might do TERRIBLE things to their captors in order to escape, but THEY caused that while whining that someone from the 1940s or earlier made them evil and they had no choice but to steal jobs, money, retirement funds, public institutions, the morals of a generation, i'll bite: toddlers, spread their legs like psycho whores to get pregnant, so steal people's unborn children, turn every fund available that could have gone towards people that needed things to money laundering and in general gleefully fucked our whole country up with the lack of foresight that psychopaths commonly display.
great job.
was it worth dying ?
how about going crazy and letting another group of evil people make an excuse to drive everyone into an endless idiotic loop ?
but hey no, keep lying. works so well.
well at least fedora 37 is released again.
give the stolen photos back.
just want to know what i looked like, and don't want to talk like a retard to get people who understand english to pretend they finally comprehend.
fucking bastards.5 -
So I thought I'd ask this in a different space. What do I have to do to ? Suck someones dick or something to get away from the chomos and their twisted whorelings ? Being around this is worse than being aware of how fucked up people can be.
Do I have to murder people ? I mean explain what I have to do to get away from you bastards.
Because I look shortly ahead and see theft of property once more and I'm trying to move on not see time end around a bunch of animatronic dummies who's unnatural appearance makes me act like a dummy and btw if your idea of 'good' is 'yeah turn a blind eye to us being robots and let us rape our kids in peace' fuck you people.2 -
How do I do it I wonder ? Get stuck with the same retards playing the same strange shady personality types I have to dodge ? Seriously wtf
Betcha if I stuffed a tube steak in them both they'd be more warmed up heh
It's like why do I have to constantly deal with some twitchy copy of some person I previously knew who is doing his impression poorly of some weird introverted jackass with a funny hairstyle from 2001 ?
And what fuckinh sense did that ever make ? Doing something to stand out if you prefer lack.of interaction and attention ?
Only crazy bitches who thought everyone was out to rape them until you found a way to flip their slut switch acted like that in my age group !
Of course I yet know how they actually are God need to find another job3
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