OH NOOOOSSSS! The next pandemic! H5N1 is gonna get you!

Personally, I don't give a cluck. Tired of bullshit to scare and control everyone.

If we die anyway why live like a pussy bitch

Everyone's gangsta until common text shaping engine allows Wasm in font files.

Wait... https://mastodon.social/@schizanon/...

I applied for four jobs today, including GitHub. I feel kinda proud of myself.

Got an interview request for a new job. They mostly do WordPress. I don't want to touch WordPress.

Talked to the Project Manager woman on the phone about the job, seems decent.

Sounds like a nice place to work at, but I just can't do the WordPress thing, man.

Today is a day where I just want to kick start a fucking landmine!

It's nearly May. I am therefore going to start referring to apples as "tree potatoes" whenever possible.

2019 was 5 years ago.

Got an error trying to [Leave] a meeting in Teams

*sigh....*

Just Teams being Teams...

Now I'm probably stuck in that meeting somewhere deep in MS's servers forever.

I AM IN RAGE !!! MY MANAGER IS A FUCKIN SNAKE ASSHOLE!

FUCKER RATED ME 3/5 !
i feel like destroying my laptop and putting my papers right away. this is absolute shit hole of a company where corporste bullshit and multi level hierarchy runs the system, ass licking is the norm and still me, a lowly sde dev 1 was giving my 200% covering their bullshit to deliver outputs on time.

let me tell you some stats.

- our app has grown by 2x installs and 5x mau.

- only 3 devs worked on the app. the other 2 can vouch for my competence.

- we were handled an app with ugliest possible code full of duplication, random bugs and sudden ANRs. we improved the app to a good level of working

- my manager/tl is such a crappy person that if asked about a feature out of random, he will reply "huh?" and will need 2 mins to tell anything about it.

- there is so much dependency with other teams and they want us to talk to them personally. like hell i care why backend is giving wrong responses. but i cared, i gpt so good handling all these shit that people would directly contact me instead of himal and i would contact them. all work was getting done coz 1 stupid fellow was spending 90% of his time in coordinations

- i don't even know how to work with incompetence. my focus is : to do my task, fix anything that is broken that will relate to my task in any way and gather all the stuff needed to complete my task

i am done. i cannot change this company because its name is good and i am already feeling guilty about switching my previous jobs in 1 year but this is painful.

in my first company i happily took a 10% hike coz i was out of college and still learning.
in my 2nd company, i left due to change in policies ( they went from wfh to wfo and they were in a different state) , but even while leaving they gave a nice 30% hike
in my current company idk wjat the no. 3 equates to , but its extremely frustrating knowing a QA who was so incompetent, he nearly costed us a DDOS got the same rating as me

------
PS : GIVE ME TIPS ON HOW TO BE INCOMPETENT WITHOUT GETTING CAUGHT

*euro-based rant incoming*

"left or right? left or right?!"

DUDE! I'M RIDING A SMALL MOUNTAIN BIKE WITH A FUCKING HEAVY TRAILER OF GROCERIES AND YOU ARE IN A FUCKING E-BIKE!!! SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GO AROUND ME PUSSY!!!! I'M NOT GOING TO GRIND UP AGAINST THE SIDEWALK WITH MY TRAILER.... BECAUSE ITS A FUCKING TRAILER, AND ITS FULL OF FUCKING GROCERIES!!!!!!

god, fucking boomers... i swear to god if i get one more rube talking to me while i'm biking and saying i should "stay to the right" when EVERY time i'm CLEARLY right of the middle of the road, i'm going to start yelling back rude comments and put the fucking low IQ assholes in their place... (probably what I should have done from the first place. why are we to take shit from them, when they own 75% of the wealth but are 25% of the population.) absolute fuck sticks get the fuck off my road, go ride off a cliff

Todays rant is thanks to GoDaddy.

Thanks for parking our 9+ year old domain because of payment 'issues' without any warning.

Fuck you, GoDaddy.

If you want to improve your life, but your mental health and energy levels are too low to exercise, start with hygiene.

Take showers every day, continuously lowering the water temperature. Use dental floss and tongue scraper. Brush your teeth twice a day. Wash your face every morning and every evening. Use evidence-based skincare products: adapalene, panthenol, SPF 50+ sunscreen. Keep your toes and nails tidy. Shave routinely.

According to Nadya Tolokonnikova, a prominent Russian dissident who was imprisoned, denying basic hygiene is a _very_ efficient way of breaking someone into submission that is often applied to dissidents in Russian prisons. So, doing a reverse of that should improve mental health.

“Does god exist?”, I typed into a green terminal window after granting GPT-7 root access to our grid. “…now it does”, echoed from every speaker.

Bruh you already know my profile, why don't you fuck around and find out.

"take yourself as serious as your enemy does"

hmmm

Attack well

What are your plans for the weekend, and if you get a chance to beat your enemy, which weapon would you use?

Last Weekend:https://devrant.com/rants/10578214

Today’s my work anniversary, which also means it’s the anniversary of the day my friend Kirk got a Twitter response from Missy Elliott after he tweeted about writing a function called missyElliott that takes a data structure, flips it, and reverses it (something that may have been a crazy thing that happened once but that we as his friends tell everyone about and celebrate every year, much to his horror).

https://kirkday.club
The org we volunteer for (and that he’s a maintainer of) even went so far as to create Kirk merch (https://store.virtualcoffee.io/sear...)

The internet says "containers are the holy grail, it's cross-platform and you can run your images and get the same result everywhere"

The practice says: nope... it doesn't do that

The final verdict is out. After almost 3.5 years im getting fired. Im relieved because i’ve been expecting this already since december. No matter how hard i try my mistakes aren’t excepted anymore.
Good thing there are three other companies i have interviews with.
Let’s hope for a new offer and smooth transition soon!

Fuck you, micromanagement!

Hey guys, you won't believe what happaned to me, I left my laptop open in a hacker coffee shop and went to take a piss, and when I returned I fou d out that someone stole all my crypto CockRingCoin 😭😭 I lost a million and a half Shekels but then remembered my brother has a cousin who knows a lawyer who's wife is a friend with a wolf who knows a real matrix hacker who can hack CIA using only his toes, I contacted him and you wouldn't believe it but he got all of my cock coins back to me, I don't know what I would've done without him. If anybody needs help recovering crypto I can more than reccomend my dear holy saviour LeHackerCockSucker
WhatsApp: +972-50-EATMYASS-0
Email: ciahacker@cock.gov

But then as I was happily looking at my crypto returned I notice a few payments I don't rwmember making, turns out, my wife was cheating on me! And using my crypto to buy her lover stuff!
So I contacted the afformentioned lawyer who's a friend of the cousin that my brother has, and he helped me file for divorce and punish my cheating wife, for anybody needing a marriage lawyer:
WhatsApp: +972-54-DeliciousPussy-6
Email: eatmypussy@lawyers.porn

I am now happily married with the wolf who's the friend of the lawyer's wife and he fucks me in the ass every night. If you want a good life like mine you know who to call.

Ok so I decided to do some Vue + Vite + Tailwindcss
OMG.... the flames I saw setting up tailwindcss in Vue 😢😢😢

A whole bunch of docs where all about setting it up in react
even after 24 hours I then found a doc that was specific for Vue
same commands for react as well where used
then I had to copy the last step and override the tailwind config file with those specific configurations

why tha fuck couldn't they just create Vue specific commands that generate configurations for Vue
WTF 🤨🤨🤨🤨

There are many airports in Antarctica.

I got a baby (<1yr) tortoise and i named him JSON.

Had a nightmare that scared the LIVING SHIT out of me for some reason where a DoorDash delivery guy was using a new DoorDash feature where drivers rate customers and are allowed to attack their homes. He gave me a shit review for ordering Taco Bell and started throwing mexican food at my window and holy shit I woke up TERRIFIED. It took me a long ass time to recover from the shakes. I have no idea why it scared me this damn bad, it’s not like I was chased by a zombie with a rocket launcher 😂😂

DevOps Engineer - Entire position exists primarily because Developers don't want to write YAML files

Hummus Consumption

Mom, Look at me. I'm famous.

Seriously I would throw you guys a party if I knew y'all personally.