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the advantage of dating a non-dev: she thinks I'm incredibly smart when I describe what I'm working on, when in reality I have no clue what I'm doing 🙃12
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Client: why hasnt anything been done for the new site?
Me: because you never paid for the last one thats been put into production
Client: yeah but that was a smaller simple site. I need this one up and done already
Me: it'll be worked on when I get paid for my previously worked time for you.
Client: but that was a month ago. I don't understand why you are asking for payment now
Me: because you never paid me for last months work!!
Client: but its may now
Me: holy shit, -clients name-, I know very well what month it is and dont need a lesson. I also know better than to work for free. I have bills to pay just like you and everyone else so until you have paid the last invoice, I'm not lifting a finger for you. That includes answering your calls
Client: oh well why didnt you just say that to begin with
Motherfucking fuck people are horrid and dumb and make me violent6 -
For the Germans among us. Found it at the Dortmund train station today. At least the syntax is right.
17 -
At least, it was honest comment by developer........
Have you ever encountered such funny statement/code ?
3 -
What the fuck, it says on both my LinkedIn profile and on my CV that I'm a student but I can take on part time projects, and I also told a recruiter the same thing over phone (after he found me on LinkedIn).
Today I had lunch with said recruiter. Guess who had no clue I was a student?
10 -
A common scenario strikes again today:
- Blocked on a problem at the end of the day
- Tell my wife I'm headed home
- Inspiration strikes
- time flies by coding in the zone
- realize I'm super late
- run out the door like a crazy person1 -
Never name variables with single letters. Make them at least two characters, so they're searchable5
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The goal of 2018 is to contribute to at least 100 open source repositories at GitHub and maintain the track record.10
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You know it's the holidays when you go to your parents house for dinner and fix the router, your mom's phone, your dad's iPhone, the smart tv, your brothers email account reset, your grandmas prehistoric phone and then you go to your wife's family for dinner and you find yourself fixing her mom's iPhone, her dad's laptop her uncle's tablet, her cousin's ps4 and every freaking thing that connects to the Wi-Fi. Well, it's the holidays, at least there was food and drinks all around...Happy New Year everyone 🍷2
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Me: I want to learn Clojure
Me: But I need real tasks to learn
Me: OK, reconnecting device with wireless adb
Inner me: Are you kidding? 5 lines with bash
Me: In clojure it will be more elegant and faster to write similar tasks in future
*2 hours later*
Me: IT WORKS
Internal me: Really? This is ugly as fuck. And the only clojure feature it uses - sh and re-find
Me: But... It... Works... *cries* -
hm..... so there may be another side to rubber duck debugging.... at least according to Scott Adams...
1 -
My friends trynna bullshit how windows is much better than Linux. They sayin shit like "at least our csgo don crash when we alt tab" then I say "at least I don't have to reboot when something go wrong" and they be like "yea but windows better" 😡16
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Stack Overflow is the largest, most trusted online community for developers to learn, share their programming knowledge, and build their careers.
But don't worry, no one will ever answer you lol.2 -
So lotta shit happened lately, life-wise and i don't know why but i have to share it:
There is a point after depression and being stressed out - it's this "well shit will work out someway.."-state of mind, where you have like an inner peace and everything is fine.
It's nice here.😪4 -
/*************
* adds 1 to i
***************/
i = i + 1
Everyone has seen at least one comment like this.6 -
Windows Subsystem for Linux should at least support mounting Linux filesystems inside those subsystems.6
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That moment when it takes 4 hours to automate a task which would otherwise take 15min all 2 months to do manually.2
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After at least half a year of using a computer that froze or crashed at least every 10 minutes I finally replaced the faulty stick of ram.
Now it works beautifully and I'm dissapointed in myself for not doing it earlier.1 -
>Free Cloud Services
> You need to pay at least 1$ for internet
Yeah, if you have a fuckton of donation money, at least give us the fucking internet connection for free you yellowcircle twats2 -
Nearly 30 days into my new job. Haven't done any coding.
Just a lot of paper pushing and meeting scheduling.
What do?9 -
Aim for this year:
Become at least semi-competent with Rust and build at least a crappy little game with it.5 -
MetaRant - The avatar items cost too many points!
At least at this level of activity within the community.
I'll never get that eye-patch.....10 -
When you put your hands together and start chanting almighty compiler gods to have mercy on your soul.
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FUCK YOU SYNOLOGY
Fuck you for breaking all my custom shit.
Fuck you for wiping almost everything (but leaving random stuff) every major update.
Fuck you for switching from upstart to systemd 219 (RELEASED MARCH 2015!).
Fuck you for using an outdated kernel.
Fuck you for having the weirdest shittiest preconfigured settings.
Fuck you for using your own custom package format.
Fuck you for being so utterly broken.
Fuck you for making me work 10 hours just to get everything back up and running the way it was.
Fuck you from the bottom of my heart
3 -
Today, Google says it will now require new Android developers with personal accounts to test their app with a minimum of 20 people for at least 2 weeks prior to publication. I have my mum, my dad and my two brothers but Google wants at least 20 testers. Yo!
11 -
I drank so much whisky tonight I can't see straight
no proud of it, but at least i don't lie like all the social media fucks
at least i have that14 -
"You need five years of Java experience, with at least two years being Java 10, but if not at least seven years of C++17"1
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Update on the kid with computer parts in his hand (ref: https://devrant.com/rants/1098717)
The old man came in and bought a refurbished computer. He didn't fart, thankfully.2 -
"Holy shit, my computer is laggy, what's taking this much ressources?"
> top
"Holy shit why the fuck is Java even running? Let's kill this son of a bitch"
> kill -9 <process>
> Rubymine closes
I'm a fucking idiot. -
Yesterday I was doing amazing coding, making big things happen, today I'm explaining how the internet works so a customer who doesn't care this job is so bipolar.1
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Sales: Hey @chenb0x, we told the Client that you were a phone phreak and could make any communication device work.
Me: Well, I don't think that's such a good idea becau-
Sales: Oh, you can do it! Here's the equivalent of a black box and a pocket knife. Have fun!
Me: But, Sales I reall-
*click*
Well then..... t( '-' t)1 -
When you type
"SFTP://SteffTek.de" in your browser window just for fun and devRant is missing you ❤️
1 -
Having to work for clients sucks. They are so rude. "We sent an issue over yesterday and it's still not fixed". You think you're our only customer? You think this shit is automated and takes no time to fix? You think you have resources working on you stuff 24/7. You don't man. Get in the queue and be grateful a load of time and effort goes in to your website. Sit down and stfu. Ahhh... that's better.1
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Always check if you are on the test or the prod system at least 1000 times before cleaning up the customers database.
This happend twice to my team.... At least our customers admins were pretty chill and said they learned something from this. -
I spent 2 weeks at work building a dashbord (not a feature but...) wich provided an overview of projects and tasks managed in redmine (Kanban tool) by using its API. After i finished it we started using it till my boss found out that it was completly "useless" for him - it had all the features he asked for! -.- ...
three days later the redmine server crashed and we changed the provider, nobody missed my dashboard and so it got abandoned :( sometimes i miss it, it looked fancy af and stuff!!
But at least i learned a lot of js and API stuff. I was verry new to js back then :)
Boss asked -> I deliver -> and *pooff* down the river it goes. seems like my tasks have not changed much since then. -
I'm self-employed and devRant has at least cubed the difficulty to get motivated!! #justafewmoreminutes 😂
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So v4 came out just before I started prepping for v3 through my college and I was a little pissed at first but then I thought to myself, well shit, at least I passed 😂 NEXT 🦆
4 -
More AI/ML at undergraduate level. Drop all those physics and electronics shit or at least make them optional.2
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I accidentally deployed a patch to the development server instead of the production server (which is what I wanted) and somehow it was also deployed to production. I have no idea how, but everything's working so idgaf. If it works it's all good.7
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Someone broke our Microsoft deployment toolkit at work and won't own up to it. The whole thing needs nuked and rebuilt. So, I'm stuck with 7 laptops at home to manually build over the weekend.
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Today's task: create a wireframe for the website.
Teamlead doesn't give a fucc about me, k I'm chilling then. I looked at their work and I saw a picture where a stickman types the domain in the browser and then the site appears (as a printscreen of the existing site I've done so far) -
Yesterday I wasted 2 hours because a bug in EF Core (https://devrant.com/rants/2323794/...)
Today I wasted another 2 hours because of a bug in Android Studio 3.5.2, which had a report only available in AS 3.6-alpha channel.
Dev life is wonderful huh?
https://issuetracker.google.com/iss... -
Please just be a dick. ()=> At least we will know what's happening - especially since it's anonymous.2
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When logging in, why is there no reminder like 'your password was at least 8 characters long with at least one digit'.8
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So the project I'm working on atm and ranted about a couple of days ago... There is absolutely no documentation and the code is at least ten years old.
At least I can contact the old dev, but he's slower at replying, than reading the code through and figuring it out 😐1 -
I just got a necromancer badge for an answer to my own question on SO.
Still trying to figure out how I should take this. -
Goals for 2019:
Finally get my CS degree.
Find a job.
Complete at least one of my side projects.
Travel with my gf at least once.
Start a master degree in CS if job allows me.
Get a little closer with my family and friends. -
So today was my first time combining mocking, depenancy injection and promises. I thought I had a relatively good understanding of everything until I started writing tests - now my head is spinning.
The actual coding has gone really well - implimented the strategy pattern so I can reuse my code whenever I want to make an API call - and everything is nicely decoupled so it should be easy to test. In theory.
If anyone here happens to write tests for a living, I have a new found respect for you today...
Time for a beer 😅3 -
Sometimes I deploy to production without actually testing the changes. At least I have my unit tests!
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Article about creating gradients programmatically.
FullHD png with gradient at the top...
Use fucking svg or at least webp! It's 2k17 already. -
How many of you at larger companies (at LEAST a 3 stage build pipeline) are using Docker? Are you finding its solutions worth it?1
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Job Interview for a vba/c# job. I'm a Web Frontend Dev normally so kinda strange when they found out I had nearly no experience (job hunter didn't tell them....)
Well he told me that he considers hiring me as a junior junior.
Should I say yes if I get the job?4 -
Honestly bad at this front-end thing. CSS you fix one thing and it affects something else, at least that's what I've been experiencing.4
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People who delete their entire password from the inputfield when they make a typo suck.
People who mumble their password while typing it, like someone who came to the helpdesk today, are braindead and should not ever use a computer.8 -
Dev goals: building and deploying four apps (kotlin, flutter, unity) ; getting better at tdd; deeper understanding of core compsci principals ; mentorship; teaching; reading through at least one software practices book a month ; attending at least one local tech event monthly ;and prepping for finally getting out and speaking at conferences in 2021.
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Before each release of Exoplayer, the developers sit at a round table and randomly pick at least 50 APIs to deprecate.
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