My cat put a "j" in my code and i spent 2 hours to find it

i, j and k declared as globals. You fucking moron.

While reading through the Elasticsearch (Java search engine) source code a while ago I found this gem:

return i == -1? -1: i;

I think someone should stop drinking while coding.

Some other nice lines:

int i = 0;
return j + 1000 * i;

Are these guys high?

Math: the imaginary unit is i.
Electrical engineering: no, it's j.
C hacker: hands off my loop variables!

#3 Worst thing I've seen a co-worker do?

A 20-something dev, 'A', back in the early days of twitter+facebook would post all his extracurricular activities (drinking, partying, normal young-buck stuff). The dev mgr, 'J', at the time took offense because he felt 'A' was making the company look bad, so 'A' had a target on his back. Nothing 'A' did was good enough and, for example, 'J' had the source control czars review 'A's code to 'review' (aka = find anything wrong). Not sorting the 'using' statements, and extra line after the closing }, petty things like that. For those curious, orders followed+carried out by+led by 'T' in my previous rant.

As time went on and 'T' finding more and more 'wrong' with A's code, 'J' put A on disciplinary probation. 'A' had 90 days to turn himself around, or else.

A bright spot was 'A' was working on a Delphi -> C# conversion, so a lot of the code would be green-field development and by simply following the "standards", 'A' would be fine...so he thought.

About 2 weeks into the probation, 'A' was called into the J's office and berated because the conversion project was behind schedule, and if he didn't get the project back on track, 'A' wouldn't make it 30 days. I sat behind 'A' and he unloaded on me.
<'A' slams his phone on his desk>
Me: "Whoa...whats up?"
A: "Dude, I fucking hate this place, did you hear what they did?"
<I said no, then I think we spent an hour talking about it>
Me: "That all sucks. Don't worry about the code. Nobody cares what T thinks. Its not even your fault the project is behind, the DBAs are tasked with upgrades and it's not like anyone is waiting on you. It'll get done when it's done. Sounds like a witch hunt, what did you do? Be honest."
A: "Well, um...I kinda called out J, T, and those other assholes on facebook. I was drunk, pissed, and ...well...here we are."
Me: "Geez, what a bunch of whiney snowflakes. Keep your head down and you'll get thru it, or don't. Its not like you couldn't find another job tomorrow."
A: "This is my first job out of college and I don't want to disappoint my dad by quitting. I don't even know what I'm supposed to be doing. All J told me was to get better. What the fuk does that even mean?"
Me: "He didn't give you any goals? Crap, for someone who is a stickler for the rules, that's low, even for J."

Fast forward 2 weeks, I was attending MS TechEd and I was with another dev mgr, R.

R: "Did you hear? We had to let 'A' go today."
Me: "What the hell? Why?"
R: "He couldn't cut it, so we had to let him go."
Me: "Cut what? What did he do, specifically?"
R: "I don't know, 'A' was on probation, I guess he didn't meet the goals."
Me: "You guess? We fire a developer working on a major upgrade and you guess? What were these so-called goals?"
R: "Whoa...you're getting a little fire up. I don't know, maybe not adhering to coding standards, not meeting deadlines?"
Me: "OMG...we fire people for not forming code? Are you serious!?"
R: "Oh...yea...that does sound odd when you put it that way. I wish I'd talk to you before we left on this trip"
Me: "What?! You knew they were firing him *before* we left? How long did you know this was happening?"
R: "Honestly, for a while. 'A' really wasn't a team player."
Me: "That's dirty, the whole thing is dirty. We've done some shitty things to people, but this is low, even for J. The probation process is meant to improve, not be used as a witch hunt. I don't like that you stood around and let it happen. You know better."
R: "Yea, you're right, but doesn't change anything. J wanted to do it while most of us were at the conference in case 'A' caused a scene."
Me: "THAT MAKES IT WORSE! 'A' was blindsided and you knew it. He had no one there that could defend him or anything."
R: "Crap, crap, crap...oh crap...jeez...J had this planned all along...crap....there is nothing I can do no...its too late."
Me: "Yes there is. If 'A' comes to you for a letter of recommendation, you write one. If someone calls for reference, you give him a good one."
R: "Yea..yea...crap...I feel like shit...I need to go back to the room and lie down."

As the sun sets, it rises again. Within a couple of weeks, 'A' had another job at a local university. Within a year, he was the department manager, and now he is a vice president (last time I checked) of a college in Kansas City, MO.

Just met my two friend dev and jay after a long time. After some initial random conversation.

Dev: What is your job profile?

Jay (excitedly): I design electronic circuits and write some low-level programs for them.

D: So you are a low-level programmer?

J: Yeah.

D: My cousin is also a programmer. But, I think he is smarter than you.

J (confused and thinking that he must be a good programmer): Oh great! It would be nice to meet him. But, why do you think he is smarter?

D: Although still in school, he is a high-level programmer.

J: -_-"

A is for Assembly, a wizard's spell

B is for Bootstrap, so bland and the same. And also for Brainf*ck, will blow you away

C is for COBOL, your grandad knows that

D is for daemon, your server knows what

E is for Express.js, you node what is coming

F is for FORTRAN, which is perferct for sciencing

G is for GNU which is GNU not UNIX

H is for Haskell using functional units

I is for Intance, An action of Object

J is for Java plays with them Always

K is for Kotlin, Android's new toy

L is for Lisp, scheming a ploy

M is for Matlab, who knows how it works

N is for Node a bloatware of code

O is for Objective Pascal, you did not expect that

P is for programming, we all love to do that

Q is for Queries, A database is made

R is for R, statistics are great

S is for Selenium, you have to test that

S is for Smalltalk, let's make it all brief

T is for Turing Test, how human is this?

U is for Unix, build with all talents

V is for Visual Studio, built with all laments

W is for Web, lets build something cool

X is for XHTML, remember all that?

Y is for Y2K, I'm tired as f*ck

Z is for Zip, let's zip is all now.

Get yourself coffee and back to the grind.

> in da zone, headphones beating, caffeine rushing through my veins, snack-stack at 75%, code and commands flowing like campaign promises, I'm one with the keyboard... I can feel it ~(◉_◉)~

roomie: Hey J! J!
me: ಠ_ಠ I'm kinda busy, what do you want?
roomie: Dude don't forget to pick up bla bla bla
me: Okay
> Headphones back on, feeling the h4ckx0r fire resurge through my gut like a majestic phoenix (not to be confused with taco tuesday gut fire)
roomie: J...J! dude also make sure bla bla bla
me: ಠ╭╮ಠ I know, you don't need to be so specific with me.
> Headphones on...about to hit play again...
roomie: Dude do you happen to know bla bla bla

(ಥ﹏ಥ)
(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻

FUCK! just tell me everything at once so I can go back to ignoring you and the irrelevant world around me!

I hate when people do this.

I hate it when clients force me to fix their fucking magentos with crappy javascript fuckarrounds because the shop is already a huge pile of fuck with window resize events fucking up all onservers. 4 jquery includes all messed up fucking each other in a cum gobbling bukkake because you never know which jQuery, $j, jsm or jFuckYou is bound to which library. I know i have to spill my own fuck all over that fuck. Frontpage slider is raping the search results for slides leaving dead meat in the results foreever. Fuck your fucking fuck you fucking fucker.

SO: How to ... in JavaScript?

Answer: use jQuery!

SO: How to ... in JavaScript without jQuery?

Answer: use jQuery!

Me: ffffffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu I hate j-f*cking-query, I don't want to learn it!!

Juniors nowadays are so lazy.

J: How to do X?
M: Did you try google this?
J: No I thought you will give me a solution

Thanks God there will be no competition for me in the future...

The shortcut for opening chrome history on mac is ⌘Y

Why the fuck would anyone do this? Because when I want to open history, the first letter that comes to my mind is Y obviously.

Also, why is downloads J? Who comes up with these shortcuts?

Try this line of javascript in a browser:

<pre id=p><script>n=setInterval("for(n+=7,i=k,P='p.\\n';i-=1/k;P+=P[i%2?(i%2*j-j+n/k^j)&1:2])j=k/i;p.innerHTML=P",k=64)</script>

"I need these permissions that J has"

J has those permissions because he worked on a different team that was granted those, you do not.

"I need it"

No

"I need it"

Its not within my power to allow you access, you have to talk with R and M.

"Okay well guess what I'm gonna escalate this up thr chain and its gonna come down on you"

*sigh* what do i do when i literally have no authority to give someone something and am clearly doing my jobb right, but someone thinks they can get me... idk... in trouble? Threaten me??? Logic, meet the window

Inappropriate experience at work? Here is another one:

After 10 years of service the company gives the employee an anniversary party, complete with cake, drinks, etc.

Preparing for a party, HR set the cake in the break-room and left to get the other supplies, in the mean time the IS department manager 'John' walks in, sees the cake and decides to take a slice.
Not a small corner piece you may not notice by smearing the frosting around, but a big piece from the * middle of the cake *.

'Mary' walks in and catches him.

M: "JOHN! The cake is for Eddie's party! Everyone will be here any minute!"
John: "Oh shit!..sorry, let me put it back..."
M: "NO!, you've already eaten some...the cake is ruined!"
<he had icing all over his hands, so he used the cake knife to cut, but used his hands to dig out the slice, so the cake looked pretty tore up>
J:"How was I supposed to know? All I saw was free cake!"
M: "You are on the invite list for Eddie's party! You have 'Happy Anniversary Eddie' on your plate!"
J: "Party isn't until 2:00...<looks at the breakroom clock> oh shit...it's 2"

About that time, several VPs walk in, notice Mary is upset and after finding out, our IS-VP said "John, I'm not happy about this. I want you in my office after the party. You can leave ...now!"

Our IS-VP is almost always emotionless (mostly just happy and in a good mood), it was the first time anyone had seen him this physically angry in years. We don't know how John kept his job.

Wear headphones at home office. Not because I can't play it out loud, but when you go around in Iron Maiden shirts the wife gives you a hard time about listening to J-pop.

Remember to use good coding practices

Everyone is posting jokes about GitLab recent incident and how the guys responsible for that must be feeling right now.
Shit happens, sometimes it's you accidentally deleting a branch on your repo and turning that into a major crisis, sometimes is a huge mistake that impacts not only the whole company business, but also it's clients work.

This situation reminds me of a famous quote from Thomas J. Watson (ex lBM CEO):

"Recently, I was asked if I was going to fire an employee who made a mistake that cost the company $600,000. No, I replied, I just spent $600,000 training him. Why would I want somebody to hire his experience"

Those guys at GitLab have probably learned one of the most expensive lessons in IT world and I really wish them to come up with a solution that not only fixes this case, but that helps them preventing future occurrences.

Job BS that made me consider quitting? If you find my previous rants, you find a lot of BS.

Here is one (attached is the actual email sent to me.)

TL;DR. The biggest BS part is the fact that I *got approval* from my boss to work on the migration and we already 'owned' specific project and no one else was working on it.

After I got the email (my boss sits right next to me)
Me: "Whoa..what's this!? Two weeks ago you gave me the green light to work on it."
C: "Oh yea...I forgot. Sorry."
<yes, the BS flags thrown all all over the place>
Me: "I'll schedule a meeting with everybody and straighten this out."
C: "That's a good idea, but I'll take care of it."
<10 min. later>
C: "Sorry, J said his word was final. You are not supposed to work on the project."
Me: "I never said I wanted to work on the project, it's already finished and with your approval. That's what I want straightened out."
C: "Yea..yea...I know, but J said to roll back your changes. I tried everything I could to change his mind."
Me: "I don't want his mind...never mind...I'll go talk to the boss if J won't listen"
C: "About that..um...the directive came directly from the boss. It's probably best you roll back the changes and forget this happened."

I knew then the well was already poisoned, so anything I said could be grounds for dismissal (the boss had an itchy 'firing' finger)

Time and karma took care of most of the rage. Not really a month later my boss was demoted back to developer and working on dead-end projects (porting data for reports).

That moment when you already used i, j and k for variable names in your loops.

Let's list some holy wars!

• OS
• Browser
• VIM vs EMACS
• Gif vs "J"if

What I'm I missing?

Most horrible part of my life:

Boss: Hey J make an android app where people can access my website.

J: Why not just use the browser on your phone?

Boss: Because I said so.

J: Ok, you want me to make an android app for your website whilst editing photos and videos for you? Can't you get someone else to do it?

Boss: Just get it done.

[Little perspective: For the last 7 months I'm working in a certain project.]
[The project is full of unimaginative, non-creative devs with 0 initiative and poor technical background.]
[And they're almost all from one country which you all can figure out.]
[But I'm not going to mention it here because I don't want to come up as a racist]
[So there's US (Europeans) and THEM. 3 of US and about 10 of THEM. And we're doing 90% of all the heavy lifting]
---
Yesterday
---
D (Dev from THEM): Hi S, I have a problem with my task
Me: (sighing) Ok let's have a call
* on the call with D we were checking some stuff loosely related to task *
* code wouldn't get invoked at all for some reason *
* suddenly I realize that even if the code would invoke, D's probably doing everything wrong in it anyway *
Me (thinking): I need to double check something.
Me: I can't help you now, I'll get back to you later.
* call ended *
---
Me: Hey J, I need your help, I need to clarify the work package in my mind, because I am no longer sure.
J (my European TL): Ok, fire away.
* call started *
Me: Is it true that [blahblahblah] and so D's task depends on me completing first my task, or am I losing my mind?
J: That is correct.
Me: Well she's trying to do this in [that] way, which is completely wrong.
J: You see, that's how it is in this project, you do refinements with them, split these work packages to tasks, mention specifically what depends on what and what order should things be taken in, and in some cases all tasks from given user stories should be done by one person entirely... But they do it their way anyway, assign different people to different interdependent tasks, and these people don't even understand the big picture and they try to do the things the way they think they understand them.
Me: It's a fire in a brothel.
J: Yup.
Me: I fucking love this project.
J: (smiling silently)
* call ended *
---
Me: Ok D, you can't do your task because it's dependant on my task.
D: Oh... so what do I do?
Me: I don't know, do something else until I do my task.
---
A (THEIR TL) (Oh, did I forget to mention that there are 2 TLs in this project? THEY have their own. And there are 2 PMs as well.)
A: Hey S, I need to talk
Me: (sighing, getting distracted from work again) Ok let's have a call
* call started *
A: S, we need this entire work package done by Friday EOD.
Me: I can't promise, especially since there are several people working on its several tasks.
A: D's working on hers for 3 days already, and she's stuck. We want you to take over.
Me: (sighing, thinking "great"): Ok.
* call ended *
---
Me: Hey D, A instructed me to take over your task. This is actually going to be easier since you'd have to wait for mine after all.
D: Oh, ok.
---
* I switched the Assigned Person on D's task to myself on Azure *
---
This morning, email from D.
"Hey, I completed my task and it's on [this] branch, what do I do now?"

........................................
Me, hesitating between 2 ways to reply:
(and take note there are people in CC: A, J, P - the last one is THEIR PM)
1) "Hi, Unfortunately you'd still have to wait for my changes because your task is dependent on my task - the column to be changed is in the table that I am introducing and it's not merged to develop branch yet. By the way I already did your task locally, as I was instructed to do it, I'm wrapping things up now."
(y'know: the response which is kind, professional, understanding; without a slight bit of impatience)
2) WHAT FUCKING PART OF "DON'T DO THIS I WILL FUCKING DO IT MYSELF GO HOME JUST GO HOME" YOU DON'T FUCKING UNDERSTAND

This F***ing government college faculty crossed my complete answer of a F***ing bubble sort in 3rd year of Mathematics & Computing by saying and I quote, " Why is this i loop inside of j loop?" and after getting again on my feet after listening and understanding this absurd statement, I tried to explain to which he asked ne to show any book where it is written like this.

To i loop and j loop he meant the variable name in for loops, 🤬🤬🤬🤬
these f***ing reserved government professors in elite institutions like IITs

My Professor today, explaining data distribution in distributed systems:

"Imagine distributing Username data in subsets, such as A-C, D-F, G-I, J-L etc... And we have a lot of users with A .... *long pause* A bunch of assholes basically .."

Was in a middle of competitive coding trying to do some operation on a nxn matrix. Wrote this code.

for(i = 0; i < n; i++){
for(j = 0; j < n; i++){
.......
.......
}
}

Was waiting for the output, only to wait long enough for the coding platform to throw a timeout at my face and make me doubt my skills.

The GashlyCode Tinies

A is for Amy whose malloc was one byte short
B is for Basil who used a quadratic sort
C is for Chuck who checked floats for equality
D is for Desmond who double-freed memory
E is for Ed whose exceptions weren’t handled
F is for Franny whose stack pointers dangled
G is for Glenda whose reads and writes raced
H is for Hans who forgot the base case
I is for Ivan who did not initialize
J is for Jenny who did not know Least Surprise
K is for Kate whose inheritance depth might shock
L is for Larry who never released a lock
M is for Meg who used negatives as unsigned
N is for Ned with behavior left undefined
O is for Olive whose index was off by one
P is for Pat who ignored buffer overrun
Q is for Quentin whose numbers had overflows
R is for Rhoda whose code made the rep exposed
S is for Sam who skipped retesting after wait()
T is for Tom who lacked TCP_NODELAY
U is for Una whose functions were most verbose
V is for Vic who subtracted when floats were close
W is for Winnie who aliased arguments
X is for Xerxes who thought type casts made good sense
Y is for Yorick whose interface was too wide
Z is for Zack in whose code nulls were often spied

- Andrew Myers

Just asked a girl if she knows java cz I was gonna try a programming pickup line on her. She said yes she knows languages like java, blue j, netbeans.
Guess *that* IDE isn't gonna autocomplete me.
Badum tss

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why you need properly tested backups!

TL;DR: user blocked on old gitlab instance cascade deleted all projects the user was set as owner.

So, at my customer, collegue "j" reviews gitlab users and groups, notices an user who left the organisation
"j" : ill block this user
> "j" blocks user
> minutes pass away, working, minding our own business
> a wild team devops leader "k" appears
k: where are all the git projects?
> waitwut?.jpg
> k: yeah all git projects where user was owner of, are deleted
> j.feeling.despair() ; me.feeling.despair();
> checks logs on server, notices it cascade deletes all projects to that user
> lmgt log line
> is a bugreport reported 3(!) years ago
> gitlab hasnt been updated since 3 years
> gitlab system owner is not present, backup contact doesnt know shit about it
> i investigate further, no daily backup cron tasks, no backup has been made whatsoever.
> only 'backups' are on file system level, trying to restore those
> gitlab requires restore of postgres db
> backup does not contain postgres since the backup product does not support that (wtf???)
> fubar.scene
> filesystem restore finished...
> backup product did not back up all files from git tree, like none of refs were stored since the product cannot handle such filenames .. Git repo's completely broken

Fuck my life

Worst exp. on a collab/group project?

Had a few, here is one.

Worked with a dev team (of two devs) in Norway to begin collaboration on providing a portal into our system (placing orders, retrieving customer info, inventory control, etc)

They spoke very good English, but motivation was the problem. Start the day around 10:00AM...take a two hour lunch...ended the day at, if I was lucky, 4:00PM (relative to Norway time). Response time to questions took days, sometimes weeks. We used Skype, which helped, but everything was "Yea...I'll do that tomorrow...waiting on X....I have a wedding to go to, so I'll finish my part next week."

I didn't care so much, I had other projects to do, but the stakeholders pounded me almost everyday demanding a progress report (why aren't you done yet...etc..etc.)
The badgering got so bad I told the project owner (a VP) if he wanted this project done by the end of the year, the company would have to fly me to Norway so I personally push things along.
When real money was on the line, he decided patience was warranted.

A 3 month project turned into 9, and during a phone meeting with the CEO in December
O: "Thanks guys, this project is going great. We'll talk again in February. Bye."
PM: "Whoa...what! February!"
<sounding puzzled>
O: "Um..yes? It's Christmas time. Don't you Americans take off for Christmas?"
PM: "Yes, but not until Christmas. Its only December 12th. Your taking the whole month of December and January for Christmas?"
O:"Yes, of course. You Americans work too hard. You should come over here and see how we celebrate. Takes about a month so we can ease back into the flow of things."
<Jack is the VP>
PM: "Jack wanted this project completed by the end of the year, that is what everyone agreed to."
O:"Yes, I suppose, but my plane is waiting on me. Not to worry, everything will be fine."
<ceo hangs up>
PM: "Oh shit..oh shit..oh shit. What are you going to do!?"
Me: "Me!?..not a darn thing. Better go talk with Jeff."
<Jeff is the VP>
J: "This is unacceptable. You promised this project would only take a few months. I told you there would be consequences for not meeting the deadline."
PM:"But..but...its not our fault."
J: "I don't care about fault. I care about responsibility. I've never had to fire anyone for not meeting a deadline, but .."
Me: "Jeff, they are in Norway and no one is working this project for the next two months. You've known for months about them dragging their asses on this project. We're ready to go. Services have been tested and deployed. Accounting has all the payment routing ready. Only piece missing is theirs."
J: "Oh. OK. Great job guys. I guess we'll delay this project until February."
<leave the office>
PM: "Holy shit I'm glad you were there. I thought I was fired."
Me: "Yea, and that prick would have done it not giving a crap that it's Christmas."
<fast forward to Feb>
O: "Our service provider fell through, so I'm hosting with another company. You guys know PHP? Perl? I don't know what they called it, but it sounded so cool I bought the company."
PM: "You bought what? Are we still working with Z and B?"
O:"Yea, sort of. How's your German? New guy only speaks German."
PM: "Um, uh... no one here speaks German"
O:"Not to worry, I speak German, French, and Italian. I'll be your translator."
PM: "What? French and Italian?"
O: "On my trip to France I connected with a importer who then got me in touch with international shipper in Italy. I flew over there and met a couple really smart guys than can help us out. My new guy only speaks German, J only speaks French, and R speaks Italian, Russian, and a little English. Not to worry, I'm full time on this project. You have my full attention."

We believe the CEO has/had some serious mental issues, including some ADD. He bailed within the first month (took another vacation to Sweden to do some fishing) and left me using Google Translate to coordinate the project. Luckily, by the end, the Norwegian company hired a contractor from England who spoke German and hobbled together the final integration.

Just watching NCIS.
Abby: I just checked the j and the f key for fingerprints, because you lay your fingers there, when you think about what to do.
Me: Bitch, I'm a gamer, I lay my fingers on LShift,A,W,D,Space.

ŁEŊ@#fmęgwjnfčuÆ®ŊÆŁEŊ3ŋ4ħ€3łæŋ€4æł4ħæ4€ħ9æŋ98ł3ħŋ98↓łħ€9“→↓ŋħł93ŋ@38ŁŊ89ÆŁ4ĦŊ08ÆŁĦ093Đ3@09ŋæłęb„guwahęgawęgÆŁ$ĦÆEı$Ŋ(ÆŁ#Ŋ↑(łæ49↓ŋw

AAAAAAAAAAARRGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm gonna break this laptop in half if I will not get a break from Windows!

I'm running it in a VM and STILL this fucker gets on my nerves SO FUCKING HARD!!!

1. CPU% 100%. Laptop fans are spinning so hard it's ready to take off
2. My hands are on the laptop. THey are HOT from the heat from inside. Hell that's uncomfortable!
3. ctrl+shift+esc to see why is cpu% 100%. It's something called WMI Host something. Kill that mthrfckr!
4. Process respawns immediately and goes up to 100% again. I have already increased handles limitation for that service a few weeks ago. Like 20x more than it was before!
5. website in IE
6. does not seem to be responding
7. hit f5. Nothing happens
8. Hit refrech buttong on the toolbar. Nothing happens
9. Place cursor at the address bar and hit ENTER. Nothing happens.

Meanwhile my hands are burning.
WHAT THE FUCK!!!

What kind of idiotic system is that!! My asshole is a better OS than this piece of SHIT!

AAAARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#@ŦŊæ¶đ@#ĸogęq j

I'm super pissed. Better keep a 30-40 meters distance from me so the things I throw at you would not hit your ballz!

Now that I come to think of it, the only times I am THAT pissed is the times I am using windows. Srsly.

Remember the post about bruce's constant?(4.5099806905005)

Well apparently theres a convergent series for it found all the way back in 2015.

Apparently its an actual thing. Which connects e to the square root of this series.

And it converges on (bruce-1)**0.5.
I confirmed it myself.

The two people who found the series that converges are N. J. A. Sloane and Hiroaki Yamanouchi

Thank you Sloane and Hiroaki!

The actual formula is a series of embedded square roots with the repeating numbers 1,4,2,8,5,7
like so...
sqrt(1+sqrt(4+sqrt(2+sqrt(8+sqrt...

What this means is you can find e using this series.

All you do is run the series, raise by a power of 2, add 1, calculate J and K like so

J = log(2, 1.333333333333333) / log(2, 2)
K = log(2, 1.333333333333333) / log(2, 3)

then calculate (J+K)-(bruce-1)
and out pops our buddy e:
2.7182818284591317

I guess I bullshitted myself for so long, that I didn't believe people like scor when they said they legit witnessed by math skills grow.

Or maybe a blind squirrel occasionally DOES find a nut.

Pretty cool find either way.

some people are just worst than the devil.

int main()
{for (int i=0;i<5;i++)
{for(int j=i;j<5;j--)
{printf("*");
}printf("\n");
}
}

(some dude from class wrote that)

Waiting for an email from a job j applied for as a SQL manager, they have no IT and they want me to rework their data model for the year. Did I mention I'm incredibly underqualifyed.

Two C strings walk into a bar.
The bartender asks "What can I get ya?"
The first string says "I'll have a gin and tonic."
The second string thinks for a minute, then says "I'll take a tequila sunriseJF()#$JF(#)$(@J#()$@#())!*FNIN!OBN134ufh1ui34hf9813f8h8384h981h3984h5F!##@"
The first string apologizes, "You'll have to excuse my friend, he's not null-terminated."

A new mathematical constant was discovered recently: Bruce's constant

I took some code from the paper and adapted it in python.

def bruce(n):
J = log(n, 1.333333333333333) / log(n, 2)
K = log(n, 1.333333333333333) / log(n, 3)
return ((J+K)-e)+1

gives e everytime for ((J+K)-bruce)+1, regardless of the value of n.

bruce can always be aproximated with the decimal 4.5, telling you how close n can be used to aproximate e (usually to two digits).

Bruce's constant is equal to 4.5099806905005

It is named after that famous mathematician, bruce lee.

You'll start with four limbs and end up with two in a wheelchair!

Not as much of a rant as a share of my exasperation you might breathe a bit more heavily out your nose at.

My work has dealt out new laptops to devs. Such shiny, very wow. They're also famously easy to use.
.
.
.
My arse.
.
.
.
I got the laptop, transferred the necessary files and settings over, then got to work. Delivered ticket i, delivered ticket j, delivered the tests (tests first *cough*) then delivered Mr Bullet to Mr Foot.

Day 4 of using the temporary passwords support gave me I thought it was time to get with department policy and change my myriad passwords to a single one. Maybe it's not as secure but oh hell, would having a single sign-on have saved me from this.

I went for my new machine's password first because why not? It's the one I'll use the most, and I definitely won't forget it. I didn't. (I didn't.) I plopped in my memorable password, including special characters, caps, and numbers, again (carefully typed) in the second password field, then nearly confirmed. Curiosity, you bastard.

There's a key icon by the password field and I still had milk teeth left to chew any and all new features with.
Naturally I click on it. I'm greeted by a window showing me a password generating tool. So many features, options for choosing length, character types, and tons of others but thinking back on it, I only remember those two. I had a cheeky peek at the different passwords generated by it, including playing with the length slider. My curiosity sated, I closed that window and confirmed that my password was in.

You probably know where this is going. I say probably to give room for those of you like me who certifiably. did. not.

Time to test my new password.
*Smacks the power button to log off*
Time to put it in (ooer)
*Smacks in the password*
I N C O R R E C T L O G I N D E T A I L S.

Whoops, typo probably.
Do it again.
I N C O R R E C T L O G I N D E T A I L S.

No u.
Try again.
I N C O R R E C T L O G I N D E T A I L S.

Try my previous password.
Well, SUCCESS... but actually, no.

Tried the previous previous password.
T O O M A N Y A T T E M P T S

Ahh fuck, I can't believe I've done this, but going to support is for pussies. I'll put this by the rest of the fire, I can work on my old laptop.

Day starts getting late, gotta go swimming soonish. Should probably solve the problem. Cue a whole 40 minutes trying my 15 or so different passwords and their permutations because oh heck I hope it's one of them.
I talk to a colleague because by now the "days since last incident" counter has been reset.

"Hello there Ryan, would you kindly go on a voyage with me that I may retrace my steps and perhaps discover the source of this mystery?"

"A man chooses, a slave obeys. I choose... lmao ye sure m8, but I'm driving"

We went straight for the password generator, then the length slider, because who doesn't love sliding a slidey boi. Soon as we moved it my upside down frown turned back around. Down in the 'new password' and the 'confirm new password' IT WAS FUCKING AUTOCOMPLETING. The slidey boi was changing the number of asterisks in both bars as we moved it. Mystery solved, password generator arrested, shit's still fucked.

Bite the bullet, call support.
"Hi, I need my password resetting. I dun goofed"
*details tech support needs*
*It can be sorted but the tech is ages away*
Gotta be punctual for swimming, got two whole lengths to do and a sauna to sit in.
"I'm off soon, can it happen tomorrow?"
"Yeah no problem someone will be down in the morning."

Next day. Friday. 3 hours later, still no contact. Go to support room myself.
The guy really tries, goes through everything he can, gets informed that he needs a code from Derek. Where's Derek? Ah shet. He's on holiday.

There goes my weekend (looong weekend, bank holiday plus day flexi-time) where I could have shown off to my girlfriend the quality at which this laptop can play all our favourite animé, and probably get remind by her that my personal laptop has an i2350u with integrated graphics.

TODAY. (Part is unrelated, but still, ugh.)
Go to work. Ten minutes away realise I forgot my door pass.
Bollocks.
Go get a temporary pass (of shame).
Go to clock in. My fob was with my REAL pass.
What the wank.
Get to my desk, nobody notices my shame. I'm thirsty. I'll have the bottle from my drawer. But wait, what's this? No key that usually lives with my pass? Can't even unlock it?
No thanks.

Support might be able to cheer me up. Support is now for manly men too.
*Knock knock*
"Me again"
"Yeah give it here, I've got the code"
He fixes it, I reset my pass, sensibly change my other passwords.
Or I would, if the internet would work.

It connects, but no traffic? Ryan from earlier helps, we solve it after a while.

My passwords are now sorted, machine is okay, crisis resolved.

*THE END*

If you skipped the whole thing and were expecting a tl;dr, you just lost the game.

Otherwise, I absolve you of having lost the game.

Exactly at the char limit

In a programming exam, we had to write a program in 60 minutes, part of which was sorting some strings by length (strings the same length had to be in the same line)... I had like 3 minutes left, so i wrote this beauty:

boolean b = false;
for(int i = 0; i <= 999999; i++){
for(int j = 0; j <= strings.length; j++){
if(i == strings[j].length()){
System.out.print(s + " ");
b = true;
}
}
if(b){
System.out.println();
b = false;
}
}

I have a guy sitting next to me in class. We were working on the same project. It's about rewriting a functioning mergesort algorithm in C and doing a presentation about that topic.

Now... the thing is that I was ill on that specific day when we got that project assigned. And he didn't tell me it either. I asked the whole class.
They just said that there was nothing special about that day. These fuckers.

Anyway...
Thé following week we had the same lesson again. Actually there were more than both of us. We were a group of 5 dudes.
3 of them barely have anything to do with programming at all. They just learn for the exams and have bad grades in programming.

Luckily, they already wrote the functioning sorting algorithm.
Since that is the case, I chose to review it to get deeper into that topic.

There were comments in English (we live in Germany) and these comments were written in a different style. My classmates would never comment in such a way.
It was a modified version copied from the internet. The whole source code.
The variables had names like j,k,b,u and so on. It was perfectly obfuscated.

Yesterday, I wasn't at college either.
I had to show up to a given time at a government bureau. They have been working on that project that day. So, I decided to ask them via a messenger, if they can give me the newest presentation files after 1 pm.

They said that they barely have anything to present. They would like to improvise they said.

"Fuck you all" I thought.
I'm done with these fucking illiterate humans.
I hope they all die in hell with satan having a ride on them. Stabbing them from behind right into their assholes and eating their ball sacks (if they have any).

Today is the presentation.
That's when I decided not to drive there during these specific lessons.

So I just recently found out there's a local idol group named MNL48 in here.

Basically bringing the seiyuu/J-Pop culture in the Philippines.

...

Maybe I should've became an idol instead of a senior high school programmer :/

Opened an old document using Office, tried hours to move around the document but couldn't.
Then realised, I was pressing 'h', 'j', 'k' and 'l'.
😒😒

Synonyms of counter:
i
j
k
x
#loop

GOD DAMN THE STUPID IPTABLES, aaaaah!

Today I learned that
iptables -I INPUT -i !lo -j DROP
and
iptables -I INPUT ! -i lo -j DROP

are two completely different rules, the first of which doesn't work (in ~99.9% of cases)

yet both pass and get added to the firewall. And both rules show exactly the same in the state listing (iptables -L -n -v).

And I was wondering why the hell the firewall wasn't working...

4 months into the journey at an ambitious streaming startup we, a team of 10 engineers (primarily full stack), sets up a tiny and performant express.js api setup.
We document plans for improving the maintainability, including outlining specific practices (not very different from general node best practices) that need to be followed for all new development.

Enter a new engineering manager (dedicated backend manager), henceforth referred to as S, with a rat face and brain that belongs in a rat hole.

Week 1:
S: let's push this new feature out asap
Dev: it'll need a couple of weeks to get done right
S: let's push out a functional version tomorrow, and revamp in the next iteration
Dev: ... (long pause) there's documented practices specifically directing against this
S: can you not do it by tomorrow
Dev: not if it needs to be done right
S: all you need to do is.. (simplifies changes spanning 5 modules into a 3 line summary)
Dev: yes, (outlines how each changes chains into the others, and how to keep the development maintainable for atleast a few months)
S: (interrupts every sentence saying "yes dev, I understand, yes yes")
Dev: could you please tell me how you expect me to connect (outlines two modules that would fail unless developed as standalone services)
S: Yes dev, I understand, yes yes. I don't have much experience with Node.js, so I can't tell you that.

Dev:
<_<
>_>
O_<

Our.. entire.. backend.. stack.. is.. Node. (Months of motivation, cultivated through hard work over late nights, dies inside)

I need a J and some sleep.

I was pressing 'j' in vim and it was typing 'j' onto the screen and i was like what the fuck, why is typing j inserting a j into my file. Realised i was accidentally in insert mode.

# Just vim things.

I must be a madman.

Trying to log in to appDynamics. enter account name, hit ENTER -- <...>/appdynamics.com/controller/undefined, 404: Page not found.

Go back, do that again -- same result

Go back, ctrl+F5, try again -- same result.

So in the end I did 17 or 19 back-retry attempts in a row and the last one DID log me in.

Peachy.

<F><U><C><K.<J><S>

Found a clever little algorithm for computing the product of all primes between n-m without recomputing them.

We'll start with the product of all primes up to some n.

so [2, 2*3, 2*3*5, 2*3*5*,7..] etc

prods = []
i = 0
total = 1
while i < 100:
....total = total*primes[i]
....prods.append(total)
....i = i + 1

Terrible variable names, can't be arsed at the moment.
The result is a list with the values

2, 6, 30, 210, 2310, 30030, etc.

Now assume you have two factors,with indexes i, and j, where j>i

You can calculate the gap between the two corresponding primes easily.
A gap is defined at the product of all primes that fall between the prime indexes i and j.

To calculate the gap between any two primes, merely look up their index, and then do..
prods[j-1]/prods[i]

That is the product of all primes between the J'th prime and the I'th prime

To get the product of all primes *under* i, you can simply look it up like so:

prods[i-1]

Incidentally, finding a number n that is equivalent to (prods[j+i]/prods[j-i]) for any *possible* value of j and i (regardless of whether you precomputed n from the list generator for prods, or simply iterated n=n+1 fashion), is equivalent to finding an algorithm for generating all prime numbers under n.

Hypothetically you could pick a number N out of a hat, thats a thousand digits long, and it happens to be the product of all primes underneath it.

You could then start generating primes by doing
i = 3
while i < N:
....if (N/k)%1 == 0:
........factors.append(N/k)
....i=i+1

The only caveat is that there should be more false solutions as real ones. In otherwords theres no telling if you found a solution N corresponding to some value of (prods[j+i]/prods[j-i]) without testing the primality of *all* values of k under N.

Working with surds recently, and found some cool new identities that I don't think were known before now.

if n = x*y, and z = n.sqrt(), assuming n is known but x and y are not..

q = (surd(n, (1/(1/((n+z)-1))))*(n**2))
r = (surd(n, (surd(n, x)-surd(n, y)))*surd(n, n))

s = abs(surd(abs((surd(n, q)-q)), n)/(surd(n, q)-q))
t = (abs(surd(abs((surd(n, q)-q)), n)/(surd(n, q)-q)) - abs(surd(n, abs(surd(n, q)+r)))+1)

(surd(n, (1/(1/((n+z)-1))))*(n**2)) ~=
(surd(n, (surd(n, x)-surd(n, y)))*surd(n, n))

for every n I checked.

likewise.

s/t == r.sqrt() / q.sqrt()

and

(surd(n, q) - surd(s, q)) ==
(surd(n, t) - surd(s, t))

Even without knowing x, y, r, or t.

Not sure if its useful, but its cool.

surd() is just..

surd(j, k ) = return (j+k.sqrt())*(j-k.sqrt())

and d() is just the python decimal module for ease of use.

I have this friend of mine, he was a former course mate and we can call him J.
J called a week ago saying he wanted to come stay with me for a few days and I said no problem buddy come home I'm always around.

When he came around he sounded quite different than the J I used to know. The first thing he said when I opened the door for him was "Do you know God?" and I was like "Hunh... Is that the latest javascript framework?". With my reply I was expecting laughter as a response but seems like buddy is serious.

J: Are you ashamed of him?
Me: What's up man? Jesus ain't coming anytime soon *still joking*.
J: Yes, he is. And we...
Me: Okay. Cut the crap man.

That night was quite long as we argued religious stuff front, back and center. I asked him why he became so religious but his response wasn't really clear. What I could sense from the discussion was "he's in it for the money" because while we were arguing he mentioned that God spoke to him that he would own a Mercedes Benz this year, so for that he created a WhatsApp group luring people to join to receive gospel messages and in turn ask them to sow seeds and make offerings all in the name of God. I was both pissed and perplexed by such an act of selfishness. Why don't you just get a real job, I asked J, and he said the jobs he could find doesn't match his taste :/

The religious argument continued to day 3 and I wasn't feeling it because it has affected my work as I couldn't even concentrate on most task that was supposed to be completed that week. I called him the next day and told him he shouldn't come to my place if he won't boycott the religious arguments we normally have at night because those are my working hours and the arguments wasn't helping matters. I ended the call when I got no response.

Throughout the rest of that day I felt guilt for what I had said to him, maybe there would have been a better way of putting out my reasons to him or atleast allow him arrive home before telling him what I just told him. I felt really bad that night, so the next day I tried to reach so he could come around when he's available but his line wasn't going through.

Few hours later I got a call from another friend we can call E.
--- E: Hey, have you seen J lately.
Me: Yes, he has been with me for few days now.
--- E: Is he there now.
-- Me: No he's not.
--- E: I need to let you know what's up. J isn't feeling okay. He has been with me for quite a while but recently this year he started acting strange. I think he has some mental issues.
-- Me: Mental what?
--- E: Yes. One time he pulled of his shirt running towards the street. I asked him where he was going and he said "they're calling me... they're calling me".
-- Me: That must be serious, I never paid attention I just noticed he was acting too religious.
--- E: Yes man. It took some time before I myself realised what was going on.
--- Me: So what do we do?
--- E: I've spoken to his brother and we also informed the police he was missing, I never knew he was with you.
--- Me: I'll try reaching out if I find him I'll get in touch.
--- E: Okay.

Hanging up the phone, I have never felt so broken in my entire life. All through those time I was arguing with someone in need of help.
How could I not have known. I'm stupid... I'm stupid... I'm stupid! I kept stumping my palm on my head. Shame unto me.
There were moments in our arguments with signs of clear red flags, some things he said wasn't just right but I ignored just to win the arguments. At one point he claimed he was God, at another point he said he doesn't need to work to become rich that money will visit him, he said some really bizarre things if I was observant enough I would have noticed but fuck me I didn't.

Next day, I got a call that he has been found and has been taken to a psychiatric hospital. He was suffering from bipolar disorder. When I got there, he no longer recognises me. This was the same person we both argued few nights ago.
This short experience was devastating for me. I cried like a baby right there in room filled with his family and some other friends.

No one knew why I was crying, it was just me and my guilty conscience. This would have been prevented atleast a little if I had acted differently. I can't hug him now... It's of no use. I can't tell him how great a friend he is and and how much he deserves the world now because it would be useless.

I pray day and night that he gets well soon and I could tell him how sorry I am for not realising he had a condition unknown to me.
I get to visit him twice a week and hope he gets back to the J I've always known, my buddy for life 💑

For anyone reading this:
Sometimes the people around you might look okay from the outside but I promise you there is a lot going in on the inside. Show love to whoever call you their friend and also don't take arguments personally (I failed this test), some people uses arguments to validate theirselves and some might not be as sane as you think.
#ListenMoreSayLess

I accidentally deleted a folder containing contracts and files worth millions.

There's no backup. 😭😭😭. EaseUS didn't help with the entire recovery.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

J K. I put a recurring backup every week 😌. Hadn't made any changes in the past week. 😂.

People are bitchin' about pics upload not working..and no more meme spam.. Here I am, trying to spam with ascii art.. 🤣🤣🤣🤣😇
P.S.In case you're wondering..it should've been Eevee.. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
P.P.S. it looks even worse on web!!
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So while exploring some new ideas, I decided to figure out if I could use variables in the known set to determine the bounds of variables in the unknown set.

The variables in question are algebraic identities derived from the semiprimes, so you already know where this is going.

The existing known set is 1194 identities.
And there are, if I recall, roughly two dozen unknowns.

Many knowns have the unknowns as their factors. The d4 product set for example is composed of variables d4a, d4u, d4z, d4z9, d4z4, d4alpha, d4theta, d4omega, etc.
The component variables themselves are unknown, just their products are known. Anyway.

What I've found interesting is if you know the minimum of some of these subsets, for example d4z is smallest out of the d4's for some semiprimes, then you know the upperbound of both the component variables d4 and z.

Unless of course either of them is < 1.

So the order of these variables, based on value, changes depending on the properties of the semiprime, which I won't get into. Most of the time the order change is minor, but for some variables they can vary a lot between semiprimes, rapidly shifting their rank in the known set. This makes it hard to do anything with them.

And what I found myself asking, over and over again, was if there was a way to lock them down? Think of it like a giant switch board, where flipping one switch lights up N number of others, apparently at random. But flipping some other switch completely alters how that first switch works and what lights it seemingly interacts with. And you have a board of them thats 1194^2 in total. So what do you do?

I'd had a similar notion a while back, where I would measure relative value in the known set, among a bunch of variables, assign a letter if the conditions were present, and generate a string, called a "haplotype."
It was hap hazard and I wrote a lot of code to do filtering, sorting, and set manipulation to find sets of elements in common, unique elements, etc. But the 'type' strings, a jumble of random letters, were only useful say, forty percent of the time. For example if a semiprime had a particular type starting with a certain series of letters, 40% of the time a certain known variable was guaranteed to be above a certain variable from the unknown set...40%~ of the time.
It was a lost cause it seemed.

But I returned to the idea recently and revamped the entire notion.

Instead what I would approach it from a more complete angle.
I'd take two known variables J and K, one would be called the indicator, and the other would be the 'target'.
Two other variables would be the 'component' variables (an element taken from the unknown set), and the constraint variable (could be from either the known or unknown set).

The idea was that relationships between the KNOWN variables (an indicator and a target variable) could be used to indicate the rank relationship between the unknown component variable and the constraint variable.

You'd think this wouldn't work either, but my intuition was there were so many seemingly 'random' rank changes of variables in the known set for any two semiprimes, that 1. no two semiprimes ever shared the same order for every variable, and 2. the order of the known variables had to be leaking information about the relationships of the unknown variables.

It turns out my intuition was correct.

Imagine you are picking a lock, and by knowing the order and position of the first two pins, you are able to deduce the relative position of two pins further back that you can't reach because of the locks security features. It doesn't let you unlock the lock directly, but by knowing this, if you can get past the lock's security features, you have a chance of using information about the third pin to get a better, if incomplete, understanding about the boundary position of the last pin.

I would initiate a big scoring list, one for each known element or identity. And then I would check it in tandem like so:

if component > constraint and indicator > target:
indicator[j]+= 1

This is a simplication, but the idea was to score ALL such combination of relationship, whether the indicator was greater than the target at the same time a component was greater than a constraint, or the opposite.
This worked out to four if checks and four separate score lists.

And by subtracting one scorelist from another, I could check for variables that were a bad fit: they'd have equal probability of scoring for example, where they were greater than the target one time, and then lesser than it for another semiprime.

So for any given relationship, greater or lesser between any unknown variable and constraint variable, I could find any indicator variable and target variable whose relationship strongly correlated to the unknown's.

Me: what iPad Generation do you have?

Client: 2nd Generation

Me: Thought you had the new one?

Client: Yer I do.

Me: so how is it the 2nd Generation?!

Client: well it's the second one j have brought.

Me: 😫🔫

When you're doing bounds checking on an array and type "i" instead of "j", so it refers to completely the wrong index >>>>>

I turned down another women who was absolutely, 100% flirting with me, because, from what I can gather, she was trying to get out of a relationship with her current boyfriend, a military veteran.

I outright ignored her and then when that failed, I made our work relationship 100% about that, work.
Even though I'm friendly with everyone else.

I'm an absolute shit, aren't I? I feel genuinely bad.
I'm not sure if I did it out of a misplaced sense of honor for a dude who obviously has some ptsd, or because I don't feel like I'm able to connect with anyone anymore.

I feel like I'm alone in this world. Not, like, sexually or anything, but more like I don't want to burden anyone with the shit I'm going through. Like a man on a mission on a sinking ship, and it would be wrong to let anyone else on board.
Like a one-man shit-show, all singing, all dancing, driven to one end, with one purpose. And it'd be wrong to let anyone get attached, or invite anyone else in.

Fuck I got so many irons in the fire. I have an ARG in the works, a full game, a social platform that the code and marketing plan is laid out and I'm saving money for, two more games already planned, plus spending an in-ordinate amount of time with my father and sister and mother as they deal with the loss of my sister, plus volunteering to help the homeless, plus working, plus studying.

I barely sleep.

It's just me. I'm like a cruise missile heading to one destination, to some final destination, I just don't know what. And I don't let anyone in, because then they might see how fucking crazy I am, and how crazy my life is, and how crazy my goals are. Thats not a humblebrag. Thats more of a "wholly shit, I'm so in over my head, I'm fucking drowning" type thing. But I'm not giving up, I'm just going deeper.

And it feels like drowning but somehow I'm okay with it. Like I've passed the crux of loneliness, and settled for going for it all, alone, shooting out of orbit, and saying "fuck it all' to everything and everyone. They say "if you got everything you wanted, everything you wished for, you'd wish you hadn't, which is why god isn't a genie". And lately I've been thinking god doesn't exist, or doesn't care, because he's left it all up to me, and I've fucked it up good and proper, and am on my way to either nothing, or everything I've ever wanted.

Is this what happiness feels like? Or suicide?

I don't know. I mean I really don't. I don't want to die. I think I could stop existing and be okay with it. Having achieved at least a modicum of understanding the universe, at least accomplished something small but meaningful.
Or maybe I'm delusional, driven mad with the full comprehension of human floundering against a meandering existence.

I don't fucking know.

I feel like I'm spinning my wheels, so much, that even two weeks feels like a fucking eternity. I don't sleep anymore. When I do, I escape into my dreams, where I can fly, or float, and the people in my dreams tell me I'm living in the matrix and I believe them..in my dreams. Feel it even.

And when I wake up, the feeling persists. Leaves me in wonderland, for hours after waking.

And I have visions, of going homeless, like some buddha, all the time, and then I say "wake up J, you're fucking crazy! You want to go be some couch surfing homeless bum living off other's good graces? get the fuck outa here! While others suffer, schlep it at whatever job they work, day in day out, toil. In this economy? In this inflation? What a dishonest way of thinking. What a dishonest way of dreaming."

And yet I daydream. Because its the only escape there is from all the world has become.

And I bring joy to others, earnestly, vicariously, because its the closest joy I can feel, when I've become numb.

It is this quasi-permanent sense of alienation that permeates my whole world, a sort of invisible force field that separates me from others, even as I reach out to understand them, to comfort them, to smooth the corners off their world, so that they don't become like I have, something not entirely human, but...other.

Often when we meditate, long and hard enough,
at the center that emerges, at the center of ourselves, we find an abyss, a whole universe, devoid of anything, a perfect silence, mirroring back the cosmos, and other people. Observing, silent, irreducible, implacable.

Sometimes I feel like I don't exist. Sometimes I think others don't exist.

Very often I feel like nothing is real. And that I am playing some sort of game. Not like a video game per se, but that there is a bigger pattern, a hidden pattern to it all, just out of reach, and I'm reaching for it but understanding eludes me.

Not that the universe has made me for some special purpose, but merely that the universe observes me specifically, for no special purpose, other than that it can, whatever trivialities may impede or push forward my life.

As if the universe were bored.

Please, stop using `i`, `j` and `k` in loops... specially if they are nested, help the fellow programmer after you

While I'm doing my hacker rank problem I have seen new word instead of using letter like I,j,k .but it is weired .Can I just know what is t_itr is that has any operation? In for loop "for "t_itr" in range t"

When your favorite DJ comes to town but you cannot enjoy him playing live just because you don't have a girl to go with it.

I am done for 2016 already. This is so depressing. Guy J in town.

I got so used to vim like bindings on spacemacs, i3wm, firefox(with vimium) in such a way that I was pressing j and k on Microsoft Word like a moron and wondering why that shit isn't scrolling up or down.

My biggest influence on coding style is working with other people's code. I know the temptation to write "clever" code and I've been (and probably still occasionally am) guilty of it myself, but it's not until you have to debug someones oneliner iterator which has !(i-j) as the stop condition that you start to appreciate dumb, boring, obvious code.

If having a series of if checks in a long list makes it readable, keep it that way. If it makes it more readable to rewrite it into a nested switchcase with a couple of ternary bits, go ahead. Just don't spend half a day wrapping it up into two layers of abstraction that will require an onboarding process for the rest of the team.

Should I be ashamed?
I hardly ever use "i" as a counter in for loops
I most likely use "k" and "j"; "i" stands for "index"

Decided to fresh install ubuntu due to unexpected freezes, now I am stalling the Budgie flavor because J reaally wanted Solus.. but they still lack support for a lot of packages.

Well, now I have to set it up and its 12 am.. good for me.

If I have four unknown variables, x, y, j, and k, but know the values of x*j, y/k, and k/j, and x*j == y/k

How do I go about getting the values of the individual unknown variables?

Me:put proper variable names so that i can remember later what this loop does
After writing some good names
Me: i will remember it i am just gonna put initials
After a week or two.....

Me:wtf these a,b,c,d,i,j,k,l variables do

There's always been the debate about omitting braces for single line if's and loops, but today I learned the C compiler actually allows you to do this:

for (i = 0; i < x; i++)
for (j = 0; j < y; j++) {
do_something(i, j);
something_else();
}

So I'm learning Vim at the moment... and one thing that bugs me is that the navigation arrows are h,j,k,l.
On the german keyboard layout, when I use the 10-finger-system, my right hand is in this constellation: forefinger on j, middle finger on k, ring finger on l, and little finger on ö.
So wouldn't it be better if the navigation would be j,k,l,ö instead of h,j,k,l?
Or is this different in english keyboard layout?
I'm confused 🤔

So I spent all day today trying to debug a C++ Program and after hours of digging into the code , I realized i had copy-pasted a for loop and had forgotten to change the loop variable from i to j. 😑

why is it so hard to get a job, why do they make it hard to literally get a job so you can feed into their system and make profit for them anyway. false sense of scarcity makes me so angry and interviews or applications always ask questions completely irrelevant and even after you get a college degree that just makes you have the ability to even apply to half the places. i get that you want the best person, because if you have to pay them a wage at all then they better work for it (get 4 part time jobs and live paycheck to paycheck), but seriously??
humans need to work, it is as natural as eating or sleeping, its such fucking bullshit that the bourgeoisie made working unbearable enough that the few people the government deems unfit to work obviously wouldn't, because working sucks, but then they are seen as lazy. sometimes i just want to go out and do some cyber-terrorism yk ? /j

The CS instructor who was (maybe an adjunct?) who no matter what homework we turned in gave us randomly different grades. We actually all handed in the same hw one time to see what would happen (only changing variable names and such), and confirmed it. Also, he used to call me J-Lo when I'd raise my hand to answer questions. (I was fit and am Latina) The second time he did it, I sternly corrected him in front of the whole class. He stopped after that. And yes he was gone from the school soon after!

Finally back at the HQ and away from Offsite Hell after 18 months!!!!!!!!!!!! Real internet! Coffee on tap! Community of practice meetings! COOODDDEEEE!!!! Also back to devrant. Goodbye Indian devs from hell, j/k they still suck life out of my day with their deprecated ways.

Side note:
Switched to Unreal Engine from Unity recently and my god it is amazing! I definitely prefer being able to use C# with unity vs c++ with unreal but the blueprint system is a great visual programming system.

Unit testing is my new side chick. She wants me to leave my wife; I'm considering it.

Unrelated: Read Dead Redemption 2 is amazing.

Taking an online test to practise programming. They give me code that takes two 3x3 matrices as inputs and outputs a third. I have to multiply them together and ouput results.

Within minutes I've worked my head around it, got four lines of code to do it all. Output fails.

Twenty minutes later, nearly failing the time limit I find out that they couldn't output the array proplerly in C++

Are3[I, j];

;( What a hair puller.

Music, but if it has words they need to be foreign. J-rock, deadmau5, gogo penguin, carrion... All are good.
Dark themes everywhere unless it's java, because it helps me compartmentalise my languages.
Second screen hooked up with the stuff I want to be viewable all the time, as it doesn't change when I switch workspaces. (bug or a feauture?)
Door shut to muffle sounds from the rest of the house, window slightly open so I don't suffocate.
Pomodoro timer on, but put phone into silent mode so no notifications disrupt my focus.
Drinks and bathroom breaks happen in the 5 minutes between pomodoro sprints. Food happens in the 15 minute breaks.
Extra RAM stick is in the mail so I lose less time waiting for android studio to exhale or whatever it's doing as it holds up the whole computer.
I might just do the java parts of my project in bluej if this ram stick doesn't alleviate my problems. I could go outside and drink mud through a metre long straw with a filter on the end sooner than android studio gets unstuck.
If anyone can add more sensible ideas I'd be happy :)

Why do programmers always start with variable I,j,k for loops and not a,b, c ...?

Challenge: rank the following in your favourite order:

A: Stargate shows
B: Battlestar Galactica (and Caprica)
C: StarTrek
D: Westworld
E: Star wars
F: Doctor Who
G: Black mirror
H: X files
I: Matrix films
J: Babylon 5
K: Altered Carbon
L: The Arrival

And any other sci-fi shows/films I've missed

Have some downtime today, so since I lucked out and found some old backups (from before I used Git) of a project I was planning on revisiting, I decided to fire it up and see what I can do to get that going again.

And discovering just how much my coding style has changed since then...

[Code is in PHP, for reference]

* Virtually no documentation (whereas my current style is near-obsessive with PHPdoc blocks)
* Where comments exist, they only use // and are a full tab after the end of the line
* All assignment operators are dutifully aligned on tabs
* Have to update the entire codebase because it relies on deprecated `mysql_*` calls
* Have to flip all of the quotes throughout the codebase because I used double-quotes as my primary at the time instead of single quotes.
* Also relied on magic quotes for injecting variable content into strings
* Associative array practices varied; sometimes the names are encased in double quotes, but I just hit a block where it's all leaving it to the compiler to interpret unquoted string literals

And perhaps the most egregious so far...

* Any time we get database results back the process for cycling through them is to do `$count = mysql_num_rows($result);` (or $count2, etc.), then do a `for ($i = 0; $i < $count; $i++)` (again, or $j, $k, etc.), instead of just a simple `while ($data = $result->fetch_assoc())`

Why some single letter variable names looks ugly to me, for example: c, i and j (and even k) are the most used (mostly in for loops) but does not look ugly.. why?

Ugly
for (int a = 0; a < 10; ++a)

Not ugly
for (int i = 0; i < 10; ++i)

heres something interesting:
The golden ratio is 1.618...

If you're not familiar with it, doing 1/goldenratio
the result is 0.618...
It gives you back the float component exactly.

Discovered that it is actually part of a series.

First of all:
2-(((5-sqrt(5))/2)-1) =
1.618033988749895 -> thats our golden ratio

In other words:
(2%gold) =
0.381966011250106

While:
((5-sqrt(5))/2) =
1.381966011250105

Ok, now we're getting somewhere. We can turn these into variables

First of all, lets see if we can get the golden ratio back out:
2-(((5-sqrt(5))/2)-1) = 1.618033988749895

Okay good.

The formula looks something like
j-(((i-sqrt(i))/2)-1)

Where j = (i*2)+1
That means we can easily figure out what j we need from our i value. (i-1)/2 = j

We run it back far enough we get
1-(((3-sqrt(3))/2)-1) =
1.3660254037844386

Thats the golden ratios little brother. Doesn't look anything like it, but it is part of the series.
And I found a boat load of research documents scattered *all* over the net, where this number and others in the series inexplicably crop up in power series, in chemistry, and elsewhere. Just looks like random floats if you don't know better.

We can actually go lower in the series:
0.5-(((2-sqrt(2))/2)-1)
1.2071067811865475

At the lowest positive value for j, we get
0-(((1-sqrt(1))/2)-1) = 1

It's kinda elegant.

I even wrote a little script to do the conversions:
def gr(k):
....i = k
....j = (i-1)/2
....return j-(((i-sqrt(abs(i)))/2)-1)

The dots are so devrant doesn't break pythons formatting.

Is it sad that I look forward to the weekend so that I can actually write some code rather than:

- Helping clients that can’t / won’t read docs
- Explaining to test colleagues that we need repro steps and can’t fix a bug based on “I was doing something and it crashed”
- Writing any regular expressions for another dev where it’s more complicated than ^[A-Z0-9]*$
- Wading through legacy VBA that’s littered with GoTo, global variables (even i, j and k for loops are fucking global!) and all the other fucking lazy shortcuts that save you 10 seconds at dev time and cost you (which ends up meaning me) hours in subsequent debugging.

I love writing code, and I think I’m pretty good at it, so can I please just get on with it?

Fellow ranters, please tell me I’m not alone in this.

Whenever I take a break from my editor, I end up pressing j and k to scroll up and down in be browser, only to be disappointed. Looks like someone at FB was having the same problem and added it to their newsfeed. Thanks bud!

My first memories of the very first computer i got?

Not sure exactly when that was but all the first memories are of me playing games:

Some paper plane game on the really old macs (giant screens i think it was highlighter orange)

My auntie also had a computer when i was little i'd visit her for the holidays and j played some kid game about dogs.

When we got our first computer i remember some 2d metroid like game but it was where you play as some lady with a whip.

Also duke nukem 1, one of the games me and my dad played together.

Then later on we got a win98 computer i played age of empires and solitaire!

(i used to ride around on my bike with a sword pretending i was a cataphract LOL, i was never very good at RTS games when i was little so i'd build things and not have room for units to move, i kept building houses thinking you need a lot lol, me and the AI were at a stalemate, most because the buildings were in the way)

I remember my teacher giving me tips about age of empires when i was in primary, one of my favourite teachers too.

Good times

Someone should make an app which takes a screenshot of your laptop screen and sends it to your phone when you take a picture of your screen using the app. And immediately goes into crop mode. Not sure how to do it exactly.. It can rely on local wifi to send data with minimal lag, maybe have a QR code icon locked to the launcher, always visible on screen to detect it's your screen.

Please oh please someone make this! I don't know the j of java.

I think I accidentally found @Linuxxx and his name :/ (J....?)

So in Ruby, everything is passed to functions by value. However, when you manipulate objects, you're actually manipulating references. A simple example:

```
a = [3]
b = a
c = a
b.push(2)
print a
print b
print c

# => [3, 2][3, 2][3, 2]
```

Here's a more complicated example from the problem I was solving:

```
table = Array.new(5) { Array.new() }
1.upto(5 - 1) do |i|
1.upto(5 - 1) do |j|
table[i] = table[j]
end

table[i] << rand(1..6)
end
```

I have been running around in circles this morning because I forgot that. This makes C++ for example, more clear than Ruby since C++ explicitly shows the intent to the programmer.

To the people that mistake i and j in nested loops: Have you considered giving these different names?

Pretty tired, plus working on something that at some point needs 4 or 5 for loops inside each other

End result: for (i=0; k<=Nspecies; ++j)

Mhkay time for coffe

I've been looking for the source of the bug for 4 hours at least.
Tipical, it was an i I wrote for a j.
I wrote yesterday.
I'm angry, but very happy because it was the only thing left. ☺️

The sacred mystery of web application development is in front of me: php is a script or programming language.
With php 7 option opcache.file_cache i can see the php bytecode.
It is like admiring the holy spirit.
Sometimes I have the feeling of programming J (ava) HP.

qt compilation 2: electric boogaloo.

$ ./configure [dozens of options]
< building qmake, blah blah, success blah blah, run make && make install, blah blah >
$ make -j 8
< works for 5 minutes, then hits an error without telling me what the error is >
$ make -j 8
< works for 5 minutes until the same error. this time i notice it rm's a directory right before using it >
$ make # multithreaded fuckery, perhaps?
< fails after 5 seconds with different error >
$ make -j 2
< same >
$ make clean # fuck it, clean up and try again
< fails after 2 minutes of cleaning >

The C/C++ infrastructure. just everything about it. and i'm not even using dependencies here.

Found that in a code I have to maintain

<div class="j-page j-A4 j-portrait">

WHYYYY ??

!basicNonHarmfulExploitTest

A

B

C

D

E

F

G

H

I

J

K

L

M

N

O

P

Q

R

S

Lets see If I can mess up the character cutoff limit 😜

I have an interest in methods to make myself smarter. At times some ideas seem to be just out of my reach. I don't always know the reason why. Eventually with persistence I am able to figure things out. However, I always wonder if there are techniques to learn things faster, better, more completely, with less struggle, etc. Would being smarter help with this. I wondered, "Can I create a program/method to increase IQ through training?"

So I found an interesting book called "The Neuroscience of Intelligence" by Richard J. Haier.
Very quickly I was engrossed in this book. It is written in a very accessible way and slowly trickles in the jargon. The book is basically the culmination of 40 years of studying the subject. The main point of the book is: you cannot increase your IQ through techniques and tricks. The only realistic avenue for increasing IQ is through genetics. Your IQ is based upon nature, not nurture. This is a result of the data, not opinion. The writer of this book follows what the science is telling him. This was not what I wanted to hear. He also went on to explain that the statement "You can be whatever you want to be if you work hard enough." He said this is false. Some people, no matter how hard they try, will not be able to get past certain limitations in aptitude. This statement will probably make a lot of people mad, but the data led this researcher to this conclusion. Though I sense he found this disheartening (my opinion). I know I did.

So after reading this book over the weekend I am a bit perturbed that there are not recognizable techniques to increase IQ through mental exercises. Websites all over will say otherwise, but it isn't a thing.

What to do? I decided I am going to find ways to maximize my potential. I will create a set of mental exercises that help me use what I got to the full potential. I know when I see different ways to think about things I get a bit better at solving problems. So learning and experience is still a way to improve your intellect, if not IQ. If I feel like I have made progress in this endeavor I will definitely share.

If you have any interest in neuroscience then I recommend the book I read this weekend. It is very accessible for the reader not versed in the subject. I knew virtually nothing about the topic and now I feel I have a good grounding in the state of the art. It has some neat info on some potentially better approaches to AI as well.

Thank you Matlab, for my daily dose of frustration.

Thank you Matlab, for deciding to surface-plot a 2D variable with the x axis = columns and y axis = rows, because of course that's the most intuitive way to go about it.

Because of course that's consistent with the standard way to refer to a variable's elements.

After all, everybody knows that Z(i, j) refers to the i-th column and j-th row of a matrix, right?

Thank you, Matlab, for depriving me of the little fuck I gave about getting something done today.

Now go die in a fire.

I'm curious about what you guys think of giving percentage updates. Like we have an x project, there are i, j, k things to do and you're asked to give percentage completed on the sub tasks. I feel like we're generally bad at estimating, now you have to consider the weight of each sub-sub tasks and I feel like when you give a percentage update, project managers and clients will eventually ask you "why is the 20% of work not done yet". I feel like it makes the work look a lot easier than it is.

I have trust issues because of my J-Music orientation. Why, you ask? Simple. I cannot trust the vocal.

For example... Reol, while sounding like a Vocaloid and is what I'd been seeing her as for quite a long while (1 year) because of her inhumanly-high-pitch sections turns out to be human. Welp. And almost at the same time I discovered that Yokomin, while have a human female vocal turns out to be a guy and a Vocaloid. And 5 days ago I found out Mafumafu is a guy, human, despite his high female vocal.

What. What the fuck? Do check them out though, their music is good (ie. not corporate pop)

iptables -I INPUT -p tcp --dport 22 ! -s 192.168.1.0/24 -j RUSSIAN_WARSHIP_GO_F_URSELF

I have just learnt that you can label for statements and break them in an inside loop

Wakanda crazy crap is this?

fyi here is an example:```js
outerLoop:for(let i = 0; i<5; i++){
for(let j=0; j<5; j++){
console.log(i*j);
if(i*j === 8) { break outerLoop;}
}
}
```
Why do we even set a label with a colon, why?

I learnt how to code, first, on code.org. Then on codecademy. There I learnt the basics of HTML5/CSS3, Javascript, Ruby and Ruby on Rails. I also began buying booking on J Query.

Only Legends can understand

Beginners................

for(int i=0; i<=5;i++)
{
for(int j=0; j<=i; j++)
{
printf("*");
}
printf("\n");
}

Legends.....................

printf("*");
printf("**");
printf("***");
printf("****");
printf("*****");

So I have to endure Java Programming lab once a week.
The computers in the lab have Windows XP.
You're not allowed to install additional software.
There's eclipse installed.
But no. You cannot use eclipse. You are FORCED to use J FUCKING GRASP.

WHAT SORT OF DERANGED TEACHER WOULD USE SUCH A DISGRACE OF AN IDE?????

Discord is where degenerates go to fill the wall with c*mshots and horrible filth.

I was scrolling on a Shopify devs server and saw a masked black man with his d*ck out j*zz*ng on the camera.

I swear my mind is fucked right now. Excuse me while I go to my bathroom and 🤮🤮🤮🤮

Junior: "I've deleted the unnecessary migration files after a rollback, just like you recommended me, but the DB-table that tracks which migrations where run still shows them after running migrations"
Me: "That shouldn't happen 🤔 How did you delete them?"
J: "I deleted the code in the Up and down scripts"....

Is it so hard to understand that a migration will "run" even if it doesn't do anything?

It's always a matter of much is there to do and in what language...
There is the IDE-Zone, which is dominated by IntelliJ (CLion be praised when you do Rust or C++) for large stuff and heavy refactorings.

Always disputted by VS Code with synced settings. It's nice and comfy and has every imaginable language supported good enough, especially when its smaller change in native code or web/scripting stuff.

Then there is the "small changes" space, where Vim and VS Code struggle whos faster or which way sticks better in my brain...

might be you SCP stuff down from a box and edit it to re-upload, or you use the ever-present vi (no "m" unfortunately)

sometimes things are more easy for multi-caret editing (Ctrl-D or Alt-J), and sometimes you just want to ":%s/foo/bar/g" in vim.
I am sure that each of these things are perfectly possible in each of the editors, but there is just reflexes in my editor choices.

I try to stay flexible and discover strenghts of each one of my weapon of choice and did change the favorites. (Atom, Brackets, Eclipse, Netbeans, ...)

However there are some things I tried often and they are simply not working for me...

might for you. I don't care. and I'll just use some space to piss people off, because this is supposed to be a rant:

nano just feels wrong, emacs is pestilence from satan that was meant for tentacles instead of fingers, sublime does cost money but should not, gives me a constant guilty feeling (and I don't like that) that, and all the editors from various desktop environments are wasted developer ressources.

MySejahtera is not a good appliaction at all! They just use Sqlite or Shared Preferences in the app for keeping the data local. (Just local?) As soon as you clear cache or data, The user no longer exist! Like wtf ?

So I decompile the app and review the source code, the code is not even properly obfuscated(That's why I can read it). There's a part of the code on a for loop went

```
for (int i = 3; i < array.length(); i++)
{
for (int j = 2; i > array.length() *2; j ++ )
{
onScan();
}
}
```

Which is unacceptable!

First , why nested for loops?

Second, instead of declare 'array.length()' multiple times why not declared it global for once?

No wonder the initial state of the app is buggy as hell.

Today was all about dynamic memory allocation. I spent my whole day researching and learning this topic. I had watched couple of videos before I got to bed. Just a while ago I had a dream where Bucky Roberts from thenewboston and David J Malan were instructing me. Wow, such a nice dream.

Let's say I take a matrix of high entropy random numbers (call it matrix J), and encode a problem into those numbers (represented as some integers which in turn represent some operations and data).

And then I generate *another* high entropy random number matrix (call it matrix K). As I do this I measure the Pearson's correlation coefficient between J (before encoding the problem into it, call Jb), and K, and the correlation between J (after encoding, let's call it Ja) and K.

I stop at some predetermined satisfactory correlation level, let's say > 0.5 or < -0.5

I do this till Ja is highly correlated with some sample of K, and Jb's correlation with K is close to 0.

Would the random numbers in K then represent, in some way, the data/problem encoded in Ja? Or is it merely a correlation?

Keep in mind K has no direct connection to J, Ja, or Jb, we're only looking for a matrix of high entropy random numbers that indicated a correlation to J and its data.

I say "high entropy", it would be trivial to generate random numbers with a PRNG that are highly correlated simply by virtue of the algorithm that generated them.

Question about linux iptables. I am currently blocking all access and whitelisting only when my users launch my software. When software is launched a socket client is also launched, it connects to socket server, identifies itself with a password and disconnects. If given password by socket client is correct, then socket server whitelists the users IP by executing the following command: " iptables -I INPUT -s userIP -j ACCEPT".

My problem is that now I have lots of duplicates of IP's whitelisted and as far as I've heard I should not go over 25k iptable rules.

So my question is how to check if ip is already whitelisted, in order to avoid duplicate iptable rules for for same IP?

Obvious solution would be to store whitelist somewhere (mysql/txt) and double check before whitelisting ip, but maybe there is an easier way to do this?

n=input( )
k=list(n)
for j in range(len(k)):
if k[j]=="a":

k.pop(j)
print(k)
''' i want to print the list by removing a letter "a" but it is showing index error why ? help me out'''

Hi everyone, I have such a task: “Given an integer square matrix. Determine the minimum among the sums of diagonal elements parallel to the main diagonal of the matrix.” I have a code but I have problems compiling a flowchart for it, can you help me with compiling a flowchart or give tips? thanks in advance!
Thats my code:

#include <stdio.h>
#include <stdlib.h>
#include <time.h>
#define N_MIN -3
#define N_MAX 5
int main(int argc, char *argv[]){
int s,i,j,k,l,s1,t2,t1;
int a[5][5];
srand(time(NULL));
for(i=0;i<5;i++){
for(j=0;j<5;j++){
a[i][j]=rand()%(N_MAX-N_MIN+1)+N_MIN;
}
}
for(i=0;i<5;i++){
for(j=0;j<5;j++){
printf("%3d ",a[i][j]);
}
printf("\n");
}
k=0;
s=0;
l=0;
for (i=0; i<5; i++){
for (j=0; j<5; j++){
if (a[i][j]>=0){
if(a[i][j]%2==0)
l+=a[i][j];
k++;
}
}
if (k==5){
l=l;
}
else {
l=0;
}
s=s+l;
k=0;
}
s1=a[0][5-1];
for(i=1; i<5; i++){
t1=t2=0;
for(j=0; j<5-i; j++){
t1+=a[i+j][j];
t2+=a[j][i+j];
}
if(t1<s1) s1=t1;
if(t2<s1) s1=t2;
}
printf("vivod %d %d\n", s,s1);
return 0;
}

i am so fucking conflicted right now. seeing my fiture getting ruined in front of my present eyes. Life always gives me a chance to jump out of a ship that's about to fucking blow , i took it the first time, but this time i missed it for bravery ( and stupidity), and now am sinking alongside this fucking ship

my first job was amazing. decent work, sometimes a lot and sometimes too less. i would learn new things ,interact with people, handle a lot of fuckups . at one point i felt like looking for another opportunity , got one giving 50% hike , so i jumped the ship and sent a resignation letter. the noitice peripd was less, so i enjoyed my days applying to other ships. got even a better offer with 100% hike, so from one boat to another to now a literal cruise.

later i got to know that my original company got bankrupt and fired 85% staff. the next month the company that gave me the first offer layed off 30% staff.

now the waters are tough and my cruise is also getting impacted. but instead of firing, they are asking us to come to the office permanently. their office is in a fucked up place: you need 8$ just to breath the fucking air there. its the city of blood and money. and you will be giving away both things there.

my brain got split into 2 parts after this announcement: my stupid self was still considering this while my sensible self started applying for jobs. my stupid self was thinking that this is a great opportunity to leave my fucking nest of a home , where i am liv8ng woth my parents for last 25 years, and learn to live alone. clean utensils, cook food , wash clothes... i wanted to live the life the harsh way.

but life still took a pity on the fool that j am and gave me an opportunity. an opportunity to work with a big brand who hasn't done any layoffs in their 40+ yrs of existence (but also known for giving shit increments)
the offer was just a 40% hike but it was near my home. i could be in office in 1 hr in less than a dollar a day and still earn more than what am earning now.

plus my notice period is now 60 days , so who knows what other offer i could have got in those 60 days ( when i would keep my profile with a big green "immediately available to hire" circle on me.

however this time i didn't jump the boat. i asked them for a bigger raisez they declined and my stupid self was more than happy.
now the company has started to send mails regarding relocation and yepp the cruise is sinking , atleast for me. if i was savingsx in this company, my savings would become x/8 if i go to that city. in the new offer it would have at worst remained x.

and that's not even half of what's bothering me. i had accepted the money loss in exchange of what that city and my company had to offer : a chance to experience WFO, a chance to live life like a mature man and not a kid in his mom's house ,and a life full of hurdles and strangers.

however i always like to keep an emergency fallback mechanism on me , for if things don't work out. I don't wanna go depressed and cut my wrists there, I don't want people to hurt me so much that I can't recover. i want to run away from that wreched city the moment i start to loose the battles there and the city starts taking over me.

but what the holy fuck? my company's notice period is 60 days, and my rented room's security deposit is 6 fucking months? i will be giving 6 months of deposit + 1 month of brokerage + 1month of rent on the first day i put my steps on that wretched land after travelling in a 100 dollar flight! where am i supposed to get this much money?!
and okay, somehow i manage this. say i did an 11 months agreement, paid the fucking 8 months of rent at one go and simply started living a shitty life there. in month 2 i break down and wanted to implement my escape mechanism. it would go like this : i will suck up and try to live for rent free for next 6 months. but wait, THAT'S NOT FUCKING ALLOWED!! iam supposed to get my security AFTER 11+1 MONTHS!! why not freaking adjust it in my rent?

I can't think straight . 6 months of security deposit has blown my brain. i am regretting anything and everything. I can't think of my roommates situation, home safety, room location, whatever the fucks we think while looking for a room . all i can think is ...WHY SO MUCH MONEY NEEDS TO GO AT ONCE!?

FUCK

What's the correct way to do an iterator in a for loop?
Some teachers tells me that every iterator be named like line and row and other says i and j are the convention and you should name your iterator like that.