When you write BS logic, but the code works anyways...

"Hey can you make these changes?"

*does absolutely nothing*

"That's way better!"

Mhmm sure. Totally changed stuff. Yup.

One of these is full of shit.

Worst 'advice' from a college recruiter:

"O you want to major in computer science? Well our school is fantastic for women in comp sci because WHEN they find it too difficult they can easily transition to graphic design. How do you feel about graphic design?"

I decided that school was a bad choice.

Graduating this year with my BS in Comp Sci and going for my Masters in Robotics. Screw that guy.

Once a friend asked me to teach programming to him so I started with basics and hello world. Run the code and printed "hello world" on command line. Then my friend opened a new command prompt typed hello world and told me he can write that without all of the bs and that was the end.

The university system is fucked.

I've been working in this industry for a few years now, but have been self taught for much longer. I'm only just starting college and I'm already angry.

What does a college degree really mean anymore? From some of the posts I've seen on devRant, it certainly doesn't ensure professional conduct, work ethic, or quality (shout out to the brave souls who deal with the lack of these daily). Companies should hire based on talent, not on a degree. Universities should focus more on real world applications or at least offer such programs for students interested in entering the workforce rather than research positions. A sizable chunk of universities' income (in the U.S. at least) comes from research and corporate sponsorships, and educating students is secondary to that. Nowadays education is treated as a business instead of a tool to create value in the world. That's what I signed up for, anyway - gaining the knowledge to create value in the world. And yet I along with many others feel so restricted, so bogged down with requirements, fees, shitty professors, and shitty university resources. There is so much knowledge out there that can be put to instant practical use - I am constantly shocked at the things left out of my college curriculum (lack of automated tests, version control, inadequate or inaccurate coverage of design patterns and philosophies) - things that are ABSOLUTELY essential to be successful in this career path.

It's wonderful that we eventually find the resources we need, or the motivation to develop essential skills, but it's sad that so many students in university lack proper direction through no fault of their own.

Fuck you, universities, for being so inflexible and consistently failing to serve your basic purpose - one of if not the most important purpose on this earth.

Fuck you, corporations, for hiring and paying based on degree. Fuck you, management, for being so ignorant about the industry you work in.

Fuck you, clients, who treat intelligent people like dirt, make unreasonable demands, pull some really shady shit, and perpetuate a damaging stereotype.

And fuck you to the developer who wrote my company's antipattern-filled, stringy-as-all hell codebase without comments. Just. Fuck you.

The collegue who I hang out with has resigned.. we together were known as the only Innovators of the project... Now suddenly My manager's behaviour towards has changed... He has started to treat me with real care as if Inam his son... 😂😂😂 The bastard is thinking I might resign as well 😏😏😏😏

2486 tables! F**king "entrprise" BS

Don't BS your managers or peers about your understanding of a topic.

It is okay to not know something. It is not okay to pretend that you do.

programming class sucks today so I drew something while actually maintaining stuff as my teacher spews BS

Samsung.

They basically have Chinese crapware on many phones, disguised as "Smart Manager" or some bs. It's "powered by Clean Master". Clean Master is crapware developed by Cheetah Mobile.

Just deleted Facebook. Finally done with that bs.

Well what the fuck. Life just won't stop with the dick punches this year.

To recap: My wife had me arrested on bs charges. While i was in jail, she packed her shit and left. She filed a restraining order, which i fought in court amd won. I have visitation with my daughter every other saturday and every Monday. I lost my apartment because she left, so I'm homeless. Living in my car.

Today, I was fired from my job of 6 years. Fuck me.

There should be a name for rants about fake stories. Like the ones you read and can smell some bs going on. I suggest frants.

If it sounds like BS it's probably BS

My first dev job. Me and another guy get hired at the same time. He will be the lead dev, and I’ll be the junior dev on a long term project. Project gets delayed (and eventually canceled, but that’s a different story), so the lead dev decides to give me programming challenges to test my skill level. I successfully complete the challenges, but they aren’t up to his standards. Belittles me in front of our manager. Afterwards I ask him to show me how he would have done it. The dude can barely type let alone show me the way it should be done. I say nothing to the manager.

A few weeks pass, it’s clear the project we were hired for is canceled, so we are given other work. They task the lead dev with porting the company website to Wordpress so non-devs can alter content. They chose Wordpress mainly because the lead dev said he is familiar with it. Two weeks later, no progress has been made. They ask me if I can do it, and I do it in 2 days including additional functionality that was requested. Manager asks me why I thought lead dev couldn’t do what I did. I said, “I don’t think lead dev knows what the fuck he is doing. I don’t think he knows how to program.” Manager says, “Huh.”

Several months later lead dev is still there, but has yet to work on any projects with any success. They finally let him go.

Glad to finally get that off my chest.

Hi ceo_candidate:

Welcome to CEO 101:

Q: How do you impress shareholders?
A: Without understading any processes, I cut down half of the IT team, saving a few 100k a year. Adding stress to the remaining team that now has to maintain lots of extra stuff. But, who cares? I still will expect my deliverables on time.

That is correct!

Achievement unlocked: Advanced CEO Practices

Me becoming PM from Dev

My colleague who left the company: “You either die a hero or live long to see yourself become the villain 😂”

I was about to ask my manager to roll me out off the project in my company.. it has been 4 years .... Yesterday he came and told me he is going to give me an big fat Raise !

I switched to Comic Sans for any internal communication.
Those in delivery/support/sales/HR/emotional crap/professional buzzworders/etc no longer take me seriously and therefore I no longer waste my time with their BS.

If not an improvement in the more materialistic side of the career itself, certainly an improvement in the quality of life.

I wish people would just stop trying to start memes on here.. Fuck your semicolon bs

Job BS that made me consider quitting? If you find my previous rants, you find a lot of BS.

Here is one (attached is the actual email sent to me.)

TL;DR. The biggest BS part is the fact that I *got approval* from my boss to work on the migration and we already 'owned' specific project and no one else was working on it.

After I got the email (my boss sits right next to me)
Me: "Whoa..what's this!? Two weeks ago you gave me the green light to work on it."
C: "Oh yea...I forgot. Sorry."
<yes, the BS flags thrown all all over the place>
Me: "I'll schedule a meeting with everybody and straighten this out."
C: "That's a good idea, but I'll take care of it."
<10 min. later>
C: "Sorry, J said his word was final. You are not supposed to work on the project."
Me: "I never said I wanted to work on the project, it's already finished and with your approval. That's what I want straightened out."
C: "Yea..yea...I know, but J said to roll back your changes. I tried everything I could to change his mind."
Me: "I don't want his mind...never mind...I'll go talk to the boss if J won't listen"
C: "About that..um...the directive came directly from the boss. It's probably best you roll back the changes and forget this happened."

I knew then the well was already poisoned, so anything I said could be grounds for dismissal (the boss had an itchy 'firing' finger)

Time and karma took care of most of the rage. Not really a month later my boss was demoted back to developer and working on dead-end projects (porting data for reports).

“In order to release on production you merge on production”

Makes sense.

“In order to release on staging you merge on release”

Wait, what?

“The CI for the staging release is called release to production”

What? No, stop!

“You also need to create a tag called pre-production-deployment, so that staging can work”

STOP FFS

“It’s very easy, you just need to read the documentation!”

How do people do not realise they are spitting out bs?

Dear Developers at Microsoft,
Why the FUCK does windows try to update EVERY TIME I boot my VM even though it fails EVERY FUCKING TIME? Can't it fucking learn that it's fucking broken and doesn't work? No? OK...

I hate bullshit metrics, they are everywhere.

- 90% unlimited downloads (not unlimited then is it, dickface)
- you are 53% more likely to be noticed with a pro account (yeah, because you fucked with the algorithms)

Just updated to the latest insider build for Windows 10.. left PC unattended and came back later and it was ready... no BSODs, no random crashes, no issues, nothing... it just works as expected...

I can hear Linux fanatics screaming after reading this 😂

FUCK all this Windows stereotypes BS going on here

Product team having a proof of concept demo with client:

Sales to client: "Just for the record, we are not selling this to a rival company. Because we really want this technology exclusive to you"

Me (thinking to myself): "Oh really? We just had a demo with them last 2 weeks"

One of the core values of our company is Integrity, and I am not just seeing it.

This is probably my last post for a while! I’m leaving for my honeymoon and we are going on a cruise and I ain’t gettin the WiFi! Hell naw!! Not taking any laptop, not answering phone!! Feels sooooo gooooood!! Especially after this shit week. I’ll be away from it all for 9 days!!!!!!!

We are going a day early so I might lurk a bit here and there but not much. 86 everything and everyone’s bs! Just me and my beautiful wife!

What the PMs always say: Always be thinking of ways to improve our system.

Me: Hey this is really poorly built. We should rebuild it before moving forward.

PMs: No just use the same code we used before. It was working so we don't need to rebuild it.

Got this email from my manager today... a bit of a downer to my three day weekend!

I actually don't talk about work (in an indentifiable way), and I think most of the other points in their guide are utter BS (and unenforceable).

I am pretty open (about myself) on social media though, so feel sorry for HR if they've been combing through it! 🤣

Woke up this morning with a fuck this shit mood. I need to write test specs for a system I don't know shit about, and it seems no one who work with this system wants to talk to me, so I gave up and started devranting and reading a game dev book. Fuck this shitty job.

LinkedIn feels like:
- be bombarded with recruiters messaging you
- people you don't know bragging about joining a company
- more people you don't know sharing useless advice for tons of corporate crap

Is just me or anyone feels the same?

I wish I could type into my brain:"dd if=/dev/zero of=/dev/sda bs=512 count=1337"

To delete everything of my ex gf memories...

She just wrote a message, again...

A while back our whole team was really frustrated with the marketing department.

In retaliation we made a new branch for our project called marketing-bs, which was used for all of marketing feature requests.

It's the little wins that keep us going.

“Management wants to know your performance”. And what is managements performance?

Remember to regularly defragment your drives on linux. use this handy command.

dd if=/dev/zero of=/dev/sdX bs=1M

Terminology:
dd: Disk defragment
if: input file (the pattern to search for, and should always be /dev/zero)
of: output file (your disk, /dev/sda for instance)
bs: blocsize 1M is fine here

Coworker: hey can you do this?

Me: sure *couple hours later* it's done.

Coworker several hours later: that thing you did completely changed. Can you update it?

*checks the platform we use so non devs can create web pages* All of my code was erased and I have to restart and add even more functionality. Why the actual fuck would you hire web developers if you're just going to have other employees use a poorly built tool to build pages. Every fucking time something breaks in the shitty fucking app, I have to fix it. Or if it doesn't do some crazy functionality, I have to hack code in there to do it in the ugliest way. Fuck tools like this. Fuck companies who make money off of these tools/use these tools. And fuck the developers who make these shitty tools that give real web developers so much frustration.

When SoloLearn provides a better education than your university...

this week started like shit, but today it seems like everything fell into place. the interns are working, the bs code i had to change works, i did more than i expected, plus i just cut my hair and it is cute as heck

Bootstrap 3's source code.
and shit.

!rant
I can never get over this 😥

We were taught 5-6 subjects of electrical or mechanical engineering in out freshman year 😃 and our course is called "computer science and engineering".
We had ONE subject in the whole fucking year that was related to the course,called "introduction to computer"!!!!
The second semester of the freshman year had no subject remotely close to computers, but yeah we learnt about thermodynamics and beams and Trusses and motors and welding 😒.
They should have also told us what we are supposed to do with that knowledge 😒.

What's the point!!!!
Will is make us a mechanical engineer 😒?
Also have you forgotten we are here to learn about computers and not about the tension in the rope of the pulley 😒?
Also we have no subjects,in the 4 year course about actual development 😃 not even old school web development.
Fucking hate this shit

My rants have been too long lately. Have some distilled ire instead.

Fuck computer gremlins.
Fuck non-deterministic BS.
Fuck shit working the third fucking time I try it with no changes in between.
Fuck MojoJojoing
Fuck ExecJS laoding only half the time
Fuck RubyMine for fucking up seven times a fucking day.
And fuck this dev environment!
I just want to fucking work!

adfjlkasdly

Just arrived at the vacation home, turns out the "free" wifi is dead as hell, because quote; "a tree fell on a wire"

Which first of all that is fucking bs because they have internet at the reception still so that shouldn't work either right? But okay we now live without internet for the coming 3 days we are relying on our data plan....

Recruiting front end right now… I’m tiered of this BS.
95% of applicants: “hey I don’t understand what you want, but look at my cool, ToDo app in <INSERT ANY framework>”
“Ok, now add a quick search in your todo project”
“Oh wow, it’s like 5 days work lol and should be managed at back end. I Shouldn’t care”.
How HOW these idiots even have a job ?
I’m out of words. I want to scream, pull my own hair and (Weirdly enough) watch a DareDevil movie

Seeing this in my outlook fills me with dread - little can be worse than "corporate enforced fun sessions" 😩😭

Not an enemy yet, but I’ve just debated with a senior dev that said stored procedure is faster, safer, and works better than entity framework

I agree with faster (only a bit) but the rest is just bs

So my wife got laid off from her job aaaaaaand that puts me back again in the hunt for freelance bs to cover up her income until she finds something decent........dis is gon suck bad man.....

Just joined a new team at the organisation as senior dev.

Team lead keeps singing about how we need unit testing and good standards.

I implement domain pattern on the backend supported by unit tests.

It passes QA and then get an earful about the code not being 'restful'. What does that even mean?

Well, it matters not since team lead changes the whole feature in the release branch and all unit tests obviously fails. Builds start to fail.

The solution? Comment out all unit tests. In the sprint retro, we hear the same old adage 'we need 80% code coverage'

Do as i say, not as I do. FML.

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Coded all night long
Please date me

Went to a Hackathon, the platform looked like bs and the documentation was mehhh. So spent the time sleeping, waking only to eat Pizza :3.

(Know it was bs when no one cared >.>)

If only i could do this in a real interview... and not get kicked out...

Quit my first full time job today after 2.5 years.

"I'm done with all this BS. Visual appearance doesn't matter, will uninstall all themes first thing in the morning"

* stays up until 4 AM googling "geometric theme for zsh"*

Was venting to my sister about the BS I'm dealing with one of my projects at work. Specifically the convoluted way we're building a prototype and the way all the revision requests are just going in circles.

Sister: Your job sounds annoying.

Me: Only when other people get involved.

Truer words have never been spoken.

if you don't have 100 tabs open at the same time then I call BS on your developer job title

I fucking hate meetings! I just spent 3 hours in a meeting arguing on how to do pull requests to master.
I am now nursing a severe headache of bullshit ideas and loud voices!!!!!!

I only went and left my god damn bag on the train with my work laptop in it (2016 Macbook Pro, started this job 2months ago...). Now I have to get up at 5 fucking 30 am to make a 5 hour round trip to collect it while making up a BS excuse to WFH, or more accurately - work from some cafe in a random city 200 miles away. FML

a JUINOR dev role job posting requires 7+ years of experience including 3 years of SENIOR experience, I feel like im in a movie...

Me: *finds exploit in site at work*
Developer of site: "You talk bs"
Me: "lemme show ya"

While I was trying to demo it, the guy quickly patched it xD (making it look as if it didn't work in the first place)

BS like this can flipping fry an egg. Drops hot!

I can't even stand the one trying to calm the tide on Linkedin. Y'all fucking insane!

Does anyone here think LinkedIn would have been better without anyone able to post at all?

$ dd if=/dev/sda of=/dev/sdb bs=4096
^C ^C ^C ^C ^C ^C ^C ^C ^C ^C ^C ^C ^C ^C ^C ^C ^C ^C

Happens

After being overloaded with BS facts people read on socials and then tell you all day.

For everyone wishing us happy new year bs here: go fuck yourself, I hope your year will turn worse than the previous

Work out the major requirements,

Identify platform(s) and environment best suited to project,

Design and develop around core features,

Allow 6-12 weeks for scope creep and the additional BS features,

Build, test and deploy in a week or two to meet unattainable deadlines.

Spend new couple of months refactoring and fixing everything.

What's worse than a meeting jam-packed with corporate bullshit? An entire day of the same stuff, rebranded as a conference.

Overheard a dev bragging about how our site is fully PCI compliant. So much so even the invoice data is secure. My BS meter went off, so I decided to look at what 'secure' code looked like.

One of my parents likely has cancer (waiting for results to confirm), my work is currently cutting benefits, I am reaching a new level of burnout where my voice just cracks during meetings and I have terrible sore throat afterwards and the only project I was looking forward to, is deprioritized due to company doing bs (so much bs that there’s a team that expects progress even though it has been officially deprioritized). And don’t ask me about the junior, I don’t even have energy anymore to rant.

People ask me how am I, and I’m wondering how much more shit needs to happen before it’s acceptable to reply “I’m regretfully sober”

Well SO blocked me from asking any more questions. Which is BS because I went back and edited my questions as I was told to.

Ohh well, I figured I would just make a new account. So I logged out. Put in a new email. Filled out all the forms confirmed my email and then I see "You cannot ask questions" WTH? Appentally it cached my browser, so when I signed back up it linked my two accounts together..

Well, looks like I'm making a new email..

Sat through 4 hours of meetings today. Got a lot of good doodling done. Yay offices!

I’m tryna be like this but the most I can do is turn off my phone at 8pm

Senior management just had a covid opening up party, streamed it on YouTube in the middle of the office with not a single person wearing a mask or social distancing. Encouraging employees to come back to working in the offices.

I AM FUCKING DONE. IM DONE.

It hasn't been a week since one of our employees died and these were the same people who emailed the team asking to donate towards the bereaved family.

This isn't even a rant. It baffles me that narcissistic bullshit like this is legal. How can anyone be that fucking stupid? Just how. Explain this shit to me. Because these aren't total assholes. They're generally nice people outside of work. Why is it that anything touched by corporate greed gets corrupted to the point of inhumanity.

Nope.

I was given a take-home assignment during the interview process of a startup.
They gave me a vague 24 hours to complete it and submit it the day after.
The instructions read like - most candidates don't complete the assignment, so if you finish 70%-80%, that's good enough.
I read the instructions; I was supposed to follow the "mock design" they sent me. It looked a tad bit ridiculous. But still, I thought I'd be able to finish most of it.

I worked on it for around 10-12hrs total (including procrastination because it was such a slog). I finished most of the "features" they mentioned, so about 70%-80% done.
I submitted it the next day. They got back to me saying they're not moving forward because they expected more features considering 24 hours.
🤨
They didn't expect me to spend 24hrs on it, did they?
I learned a few things, so I guess it wasn't a complete waste of time.

"I made a PWA, I'm a mobile app developer"
Me: No fuck off, you're a lazy cunt that doesn't want to learn native development.

"curl : The response content cannot be parsed because the Internet Explorer engine is not available, or Internet Explorer's first-launch configuration is not complete. Specify the UseBasicParsing parameter and try again."

Why the flying fuck do i have to configure some BS in internet explorer to use curl in Powershell? I thought IE was finaly dying, but nope!

So, I've been having to deal with server issues and other BS. All of these issues have caused all of my websites to be down. For the longest time, I couldn't get Nginx to find my websites' directories except for the default Nginx website, so I changed the default Nginx website to what you see in the image.

I tried to be funny, did I succeed? Even a little bit?

So, I am currently seeking opportunities at other companies. I randomly got a call on Thursday around 12pm from an unknown number and I was not able to take that call as I was in a meeting. Later on, after looking up that number on Truecaller, I found out that it’s a recruiter from a US-based firm that I had applied to earlier. I immediately tried to call that person again but she was not able to talk as she was in another meeting. I tried texting the recruiter asking for her availability but she didn’t respond. I called again and this time she got annoyed at me, saying that she will call me back if needed. Now, on the weekend I again tried to message her, asking when she is free for a conversation, she is acting high and mighty, saying that she will call me when we (the company) have interviews again (hinting that I have missed the opportunity and it’s my fault). Her passive-aggressive attitude seems to be coming because I didn’t take her earlier call— I did not deliberately avoid her call, I was in another meeting. I was not given any intimation that she is going to call me— let alone on a weekday at 12pm. My current company expects a high-level of professionalism and I intend to show the same level of professionalism in any future companies that I work with. This kind of dehumanization (mainly due to a power imbalance in top-down heirarchical structure) is why big companies have hard time retaining workers these days. And this company was not Google/Apple or anything remotely in the same league. So I seemed to have dodged a bullet there.

*Dont you want to become a professional python dev?“ Take this course on udemy.

DONT YOU WANT TO SHUT UP AND SHOW ME AT LEAST ADS THAT ARENT PISSING ME OFF THAT MUCH? I learn where else because these tutorials are the biggest bs on the planet.

When the project you've been working on gets canned at 85% completion since your project stakeholder decides to go back to the contractor he was initially trying to replace...

How's your morning, fellow devs?

How am I supposed to deal with unwanted swag? I attended a VR dev meetup (turned out to be pure corporate advertising) and someone placed unsolicited swag at my desk. After the corporate spiel I privately asked one of the coordinators where to return this because I don't want to put it to waste. He called me rude and walked away.

I'll just start off with how I really feel. Fuck big corporations with their career robots and retarded practices!
Now for a story. So I work remotely for most of the time nowadays, since my company has as clients big corporations. Used to be embedded with said clients, but it became kind of painful to work with them all so I asked to be reassigned to a remote position.
Now for the retarded part: The fucking Klingons I'm working with have two tiers to their VPN, but won't let me have the full version because it would be too fucking expensive. I checked and it's fucking 50 bucks per year difference.
So for that the Klingons are making me code through a remote connection that has a "best effort" priority.
Fuck.
Anyway after 3 weeks of writing code at a 400-600ms latency I finally snap.
I try to use a proxy and it. I write one myself, gets balcklisted in 2 days.
After about another week of writing code through a fuck straw I start working on node socket with 2 clients and a server that encrypts the send data, and syncs 2 folders between my workstation and the remote one.
It's been a month now and it is still working. It's not perfect, but I can at least write code without lag.

Question for you peeps: What shenanigans have you pulled to bypass shit like this?

Had some interviews with some companies around. At this point, even though I’ve been a Machine Learning Engineer for 7+ years now. I’m convinced that 90% of companies that claim to be “AI-Powered” just means that they use python for their backend.

I've lost all my fucks, I gave them all away!

I'm so over everything today! I have an interview on Monday and I'm always super anxious not matter what it is. I hate caring so much about crap nobody gives any actual fucks about!
I'm tired of caring about crap, being a single parent looking for a job for so long now and dealing with all my responsibilities is BS

I'm sick and tired of everything today!!!!!!!!!!!!

Currently literally sitting in a meeting about meetings. Like for real, the topic the last 15 minutes has been what the difference between 3 of the daily team meetings is.

Then the dumbass who booked this for two hours says about one of the others "an hour is long"

The company I work for just screwed me out of a bonus while negotiating my salary after I handed in my notice. I really don't understand the logic of large companies that make these decisions that save them a few hundred bucks only to tarnish their reputation and assure that people like me will never EVER come back to work for them.
Can't wait for my notice period to be up!

something kinda depressing about devrant is that, because of sexist bs, women have prime rant material, but this app is also full of sexist bs, so it ends up being kinda hostile towards a significant portion of the users

On the morning of my 4th day at the new job I woke up with that feeling in my stomach "I fucking don't want to go to work anymore".

it took 3 days. Must be my personal best.

COO Snake ousts CEO, fires founders, is generally clueless about tech and product and design and science (and basically everything this business is about) and expected me to drop everything else I do (rich, varied and fulfilling) and work full time as a slave-nerd. Some people just don’t get it.

To create a bank that's 99% digital (the 1% is for office space) with no BS charges and kick-ass money management tools.

I haven't been productive since the bs. (Refer to previous rant) And one deadline is approaching very fast.

My Christmas was ruined because I was anxious/annoyed/everything negative about the bs as well as being alone and stuck in a village. My new year has always been crap but this year it was extra crap.

Overall, I'm having none of the fun. My life is starting to feel like a deadend. I feel like I have to give up on my dreams to survive. And that no one is really on my side, despite whatever they say.

The ADHD rejection sensitivity is also heavily activated. Like I know that realistically I can fix this, but at this point I just want to break everything and let the ship sink.

I have lost time that I could be productive to this bs. And I wish nothing but misery for all those responsible for putting me in this situation. (I take responsibility for my mistakes, but not for how others behaved towards me)

Seriously what's wrong with the market right now, this is basically what some job ads said. They were even from the same company

Frontend job ad: are you a rainbow rockstar developer who just loves to code OwO(unpaid overtime) [buzzwords...]

Embedded systems job ad:
Serious job description
Required experience in c/c++
Other non bs stuff

Corporate IT: We don’t think you need Saas product A. We have SharePoint and SharePoint can do anything! Sharepoint eliminates the need for any and all Sass products, it all just comes down to customizing it!

Dev: …

Two months of meaningless meetings and calls to assess "requirements" and three months worth of actual development work crammed into 3 weeks. Fuck this corporate bs. Agile my ass.

The YouTube ad content Nazi's just forced me to watch another WIX ad. This one featured the super model Karlie Kloss who is the spokesperson for a organization that tries to get girls into coding....

Evil on top of Evil on top of Evil

Ok, I am actually losing my mind at this bad excuse of a work place.

This guy, that I had only briefly talked to in email twice before, never met or even had a video chat, opened a ticket like this:

"Hi Alt-Tab,

I hope you enjoyed the end of last week, the weekend, and the beginning of this one! All well here. I ventured to [random place in London] for the first time on Saturday – liked it."

Now. I already can't fucking stand when colleagues that are not at all close start emails with "how was your weekend?" shit because then I have to waste another minute addressing that. But this guy took it to such another level that I literally had to read his email 3 times to believe what I just witnessed.

And of course he then went on and described the issue as folows:

"Just a quick note about the issue I have - could you let me know why the calendars are not syncing?"

Maybe if you fucking spent half of the energy of you writing a polite bullshit "hello" and instead used that to actually describe the issue I could help.

Fuck off.

I can't be the only one having thoughts about glueing a note 7 under my PMs car so I don't have to listen to his bs anymore...🤔🤔

I am fed uuuuuup with the whole Corona bullshit at work, every, single, damn, daaaaay.

Fack.

I actually hate sleeping

I spent about 9.5hrs in bed lastnight.
I got 4.5 hours sleep.
I woke up 3 hours after my alarm started going off.

Why is this bs ughhhh

just so you boys know, "sorry you feel this way" is not an apology, and if a guy comes with this bs to me they will be sorry for the way I'll feel then

If I’m looking for a framework or tool and it doesn’t have any immediate code on the homepage, but rather just a bunch of marketing BS, fuck you I’m not using it

Realtalk: I LOL when I read corporate BS that talks up product, skillz, or tech. But when I fix something in the background, and I read the manager's client email saying something like "our marvellous technical team has found the issue and resolved it" I gotta say I wanna strut for a bit. <_<

"We need to have a meeting to clarify your role"

My head: Just give me a raise and then leave me alone

My mouth: Yea, sure. When works for you

Context:
My job is a little confusing.
My title on paper is support technician and I'm on the DevOps team but I have my own project to automate health checks. So most the accurate title for me would actually be Automation Developer Attached To [department name] DevOps

My family sometimes send me tick tock videos. I usually open them on brave browser. Dude, why the fuck is brave blocking "motion sensor" through camera? what kind of spying is this? tick tock is spyware and cancer fr

W8 wut?! O.o
How the hell is someone gonna hack my computer using calculator?!
Also WTH?! I don't even know what that built in admin BS is in win10, let alone how to log in with this o.O

At home: Man I really love code and everything I can do with it. I'm a fucking wizard.

At work: You want me to copy and paste some text into the view for you? Okay... *cries into keyboard*

From a job posting I recently viewed:

"About you: We don't care about years of experience or knowledge of particular technologies, if you have a computer science degree; or a degree at all for that matter."

further down in the same posting...:

"Qualifications:
-MS/BS in Computer Science or related background
-2-3 years of front-end development experience with HTML, CSS, and JavaScript and related JavaScript frameworks such as Backbone, React, or similar technologies"

........

I'm in such a mood to pick a fight with someone. not anyone, a specific someone, my boss. i want to ruin this person's day. i want him to fume like the little chihuahua he is, and if he wants to antagonize me at least he should do that right. come on, yap like the little shit you are. fucking hate this slippery, quiet bs, fucking us over and pretending to be civil

So I went through the first round Google interview process and was declined for not "finishing fast enough" even though I did in fact solve the problem in the allotted time.

Either it's a BS excuse and they were just interviewing me to interview me for a quota or there is some invisible time limit that I am not aware of.

Really annoys me when I just don't know exactly what I'm doing wrong and instead get what feels like cop out answers.

I really think 1 hr+ meetings are a fucking waste of time. By minute 40, people's attentions waver.

If I ever run my own shop I will fucking ban meetings that last more than 30 minutes, and have a hard cap of 7 people per meeting and require a fucking agenda. God damn it. Being stuck in meetings where 90% of crap not relevant to me is bs.

#TiltedMonday

Found this using elementary os

So while browsing the market i found this "thing"

Am am the only one who things that this is a huge BS?

people that answer a question with another fucking irrelevant question should have a special place in hell !!

why dont you just answer the fucking question when in the first place i asked you politely and nicely !!

the question doesn't even deserve a fucking follow up question in the first place !!

you've wasted both our time with your stupidity!!

Android's "Bottom Sheet" sounds like "bottom shit" and, when abbreviated, reads like BS.

When you have to lock down #general in #slack because people cant be responsible.

Then get stuck making #bs-general and other #bs prefixed channels so that people know if they join them they will be annoyed.

'Tim Berners-Lee invented the internet 25 years ago today.' If I hear that BS one more time..... #ffs

Udacity scholarships are total bs, a total business tactic.
Nothing is free.
There is no such thing as free lunch.

Fucking Huawei have stopped giving out codes for unlocking the bootloader of their devices. You can't even get one by messaging their support.

Now you can't even root Huawei phones anymore unless you pay for some very sketchy looking software.

Fuck this

A meeting to redefine the definition of done. Which a "senior" programmer threw in.

3 hours after we are still there to "define"... All of this because this developer and a couple more want to keep a physical board which has no space for a "testing" section, so the tasks need either to be done-but-not-really and this is technically wrong (who cares?) or in-progress-but-not-really which is technically wrong (again, who cares?).

Just effin find a bigger board and don't waste 3 hours of my life and/or start thinking pragmatically and accept tasks can move backwards or have a ticket saying "testing" stuck to them, ffs!

The funny part? This dev is probably one of the grumpiest devs I met when you talk about meetings which are actually useful.

I’m starting to question the whole “programmer shortage” scenario. If there is such a high demand for programmers, why is everyone I know struggling to find a job or even keep it.

Is that time of the year when my company sends us gifts and they end up being the worst chinese products.

There was internet. Pure, beautiful, attractive but then it started to fuck with more people then it should.
Now everyone fucks internet that doesn’t care anymore. It just sells his ass to whoever have more money.

Welcome to corporate world bitches.

Just got rejected for BS reasons after handing in an assignment. Just tell me you found someone better, it's not a crime.

Being a junior myself before all I can say with others that came after me was:

- Keep your head down
- Don't take everything as an offense
- People are rude or angry, but that's just how we are: we deal with normal users' BS everytime that we just wanted a break.

Hiring is a complete BS. A combination of 4 hours in total interview + 7 day worth of assignment for a senior role. Stop giving them this immense power to push people around for free.

Most of this BS is run by leftist douchebags looking to just fill in diversity gender gap. Fucking bunch of retards and a waste of time.

Oh gosh, if you like building stuff, how do you find a job that is actually building stuff instead of dealing with software complexity bs, bureaucracy, red tape, processes to justify other people’s jobs… 🤦‍♂️

Reply to a recruiter today quoting her email:

You will end up with more qualified people if you don't use blatantly fictitious statements like. "While it's not often that I like to email people I don' t know (especially those in different cities!)" You're a recruiter using LinkedIn, the activity of recruiting is partially doing exactly the above.

No interest, have a good day.

On today's episode of Corporate BS

I must please go update logstash on this server. Okay, so I literally just need to ssh in and run "yum update logstash"

No, I need to apply for temp root access and depending who picks up that ticket, I may have to log a change request

Somebody please explain.

First I get some call about some investing bs, then I get an automated voice call also about something financial related

From fucking +000000

Interviewer: Implement Binary Search on a Linked List

Me: * did so on the whiteboard *

Interviewer: *irritated* This is complete BS

Me: Yes, a complete Binary Search 🙂

I have a personal project I work on. Basically, getting paid fulltime to work on that...

No meetings or bs, just me working on what I want to work on.

What is this Google AMP BS?

Since graduation, I have worked in IT for 2 years, mostly in testing and implementation side. Finally I got a developer position in the field I wanted (Data Engineering). I had never thought that it would be such a soul crushing experience. My current company is very notorious for its bad management practices, but there is indeed a bigger picture to this. The IT industry in general has devolved into a gigantic ponzi scam built on exploitation and BS. Quality of solution and quality of work was replaced with a ‘Does it work now?’ approach with zero contingency. And the fact that geeks and nerds are naive only helps the white collar crooks to exploit them as code monkeys. Fuck all of this!

Looking a pr I found this piece of art in a css file:

width: 86.3624%;

Me: "something feels off about this."
Colleague: "Again with your readability bs?"
Me: *looks at the camera, perplexed* (The camera as in: I'm in a sitcom, not as pair programming)

i spent two days fixing some bs styling made on our platform. this guy put redundant attributes in the classes and the elements themselves and instead of using :hover he just created hover with jquery. i stared at my screen for 10 minutes when i saw that. the worst part is he was not dumb, so how 🤦‍♀️

Chasing fucking unicorns…

I want an F# job where I don’t have to deal with the M$ bs beyond dotnet.. no fucking M$ servers, no Win workstations, none of that bs that makes work uncomfortable.

Guess that ain’t happening.

Looks like I’m going to be stuck writing PHP for the dough indefinitely, and be content in playing around with greatness on my own time.

TFW you call BS on a client/colleague's actions, they concede and you feel guilty for confroting them.

Hey uh Google... Can you f*ck off with this bs?

I’ve written at least a dozen bad reviews about my current company on sites like Quora and Glassdoor.

Awful idea of the day - Have a programming language with no comments, but regex preprocessor macros. Use macros to define your own comment syntax and strip them before compiling.

#define /\/\/.*//

I spent about 45 mins this morning going through memes and gaming videos till my workstation finished doing updates.

On one side: fuck updates, what in the holy fuck.

On the other side: fuck yeah, down time to do bs.

I ain't even gonna bitch about Microsoft. It is what it is. Legit no complaints.

Just wish the process was maybe a lil bit similar to Debian updates maybe. Just maybe.

Read online some time ago that "Rust libraries that have not been updated in a bit are not abandoned, they are practically done"

And I find that beautiful, but because I am more commonly associated with rapid breaking bs a-la JS (among other languages) then I do not know if this makes me anxious or paranoid.

this may sound like bs, but it's mostly about posture. it's fine to be a bit slower than the rest, but being punctual, responsible, patient, engaged, those are things people notice and value. if you're gonna be the boss you're not gonna be doing minion tasks anyway, it makes sense to pick someone with soft skills and maturity

Our makefile contains these lines:
bs: build-and-start
build-and-start:
[...]

So `make bs` is our go-to command

One thing I truly fucking dislike about the development life is knowing about server administration. I think that the mental hurdle that is to develop a huge application, make a stable dev environment, learn all the tools, tricks, techniques, modern standards, processes whatever, detailing software engineering are way tf too much to also handle server admin shit.

We don't have anyone at work that deals with that, and as such my devs need to know how to do entire series of maintenance shit that just takes time and effort plus hours of notetaking and study. I mean I get it, they should know their way around a linux environment enough to troubleshoot issues that are related to the os when working with some tools, but fuuuuuuuck me man, setting up a server, even for the holy grail of easy (standard lamp stack) takes way tf too much.

Wish we could have a dedicated server admin in the team.

I know where my faults are, setting up servers is something that I know but just can't be assed with in terms of keeping up, I wish we had a devops dedicated server admin deployment guru cuz I really cannot stand losing hours doing this shit.

It also diminishes good s admins in value, "weLl ThE deVs caN do It" YEAH BITCH but wouldn't it be nice to have an expert concentrating on JUST THAT?

FUCK man

If you work hard you can perfect everything, even BS.

Ffs, HOW!?!? Fuck! I need to get this rotten bs out.

RDS at its max capabilities from the top shelf, works OK until you scale it down and back up again. Code is the same, data is the same, load is the same, even the kitchen sink is the same, ffs, EVERYTHING is the same! Except the aws-managed db is torn down and created anew. From the SAME snapshots! But the db decides to stop performing - io tpt is shit, concurrency goes through the roof.

Re-scale it a few more times and the performance gets back to normal.

And aws folks are no better. Girish comes - says we have to optimize our queries. Rajesh comes - we are hitting the iops limit. Ankur comes - you're out of cpu. Vinod thinks it's gotta be the application to blame.

Come on guys, you are a complete waste of time for a premium fucking support!

Not to mention that 2 enhanced monitoring graphs show anythung but the read throughput.

Ffs, Amazon, even my 12yo netbook is more predictable than your enterprise paas! And that support..... BS!

We're now down to troubleshooting aws perf issues rather than our client's....

Just when I had almost fallen in love with this new job which I started 8 months ago, this happens.

My “manager” had conversation with me. He was complaining that my work is of poor quality (objectively speaking, it is not). I don’t even directly work with this manager anymore. He “leads” this big project and he really wanted me to get involved in it but I struggled because it’s a big codebase and I was a new joiner. Months later, a new project was started and I worked on the backend for it. And I really liked that project more as I literally wrote it from scratch. And even the “mangers” for that project was a bit chilled out.

Now, the first “manager” kept trying to involve me in the first project but new requirements kept popping up in the second project and I was happy to work there. Somewhere down the this, this irked the first “manager”. Also, the company is known to be very cheap with salaries (a good work culture though) and they are paying me more than others since I switched from another company to work there. So they are probably expecting more output for the salary they are paying me. That seems to be the main problem here.

Obviously this first “manager” has never worked a development job before, let alone reviewing my code or something. So I was confused after this conversation. He’s asking me if I noticed these issues in my work and how I can do better and I bluntly replied no, I don’t see any issues in my work. He said he’ll speak to me again on Friday (2 days from now) and expects me to give an answer about how I can improve and stuff. He seems to be power-tripping do so I’ll probably be firm about my position. Will probably mention the money part as well.

It sucks that I left a corporation because of work culture issues and joined this smaller company. And I see the same corporate disconnect cropping up here.

Did you ever take advantage of clients that has less computer literacy? Like have you ever escape a bug in the system by telling the client heavy technical BS! 😋

PS - fixings that bug later obviously!!

Why does your BS app (that is obviously made with electron because of course it is) feels entitled to put its garbage into my Documents folder?

A colleague came to me ranting about some feature marketing wants.
"Save whether the user accepted, rejected or ignored the TOS." They have to accept the privacy agreement first, so this feature is most likely about annoying users who rejected the TOS. Totally justified. Fuck that marketing team.

Reading job offerings makes me want to choke their writers, I don't fucking care about all the fucking bs you are writing, just give a SHORT list with SIMPLE info.

Just one post already gave me a headache.

"It's very unfortunate that someone has to sit 10 hours a day on a computer screen but that's what we are paying for."
Working with an EU client.
Task is in stages beginning from assessment of an 9 year old Salesforce instance, cleanup and then transition to lightning.
The deliverabale in the first stage is excel sheet - objects(2400+), fields, apps, packages, profiles(110k), users, perm sets, apex classes, triggers, pages, s-controls and insert each and everything that a Salesforce instance could have.
Each and every data needs to be, analyzed and documented with our recommendations before being sent over. (Finding duplicates in 110k profiles??)
Oh, did I tell you, this was to be done four weeks? Weekend goes to hell.
That's when this beautiful motivational line comes up from the bridge, "It's very unfortunate that someone has to sit 10 hours a day on a computer screen but that's what we are paying for."
Fortunately(un?), that part of project is done and over with.

Now comes the clean up, identify packages not being used, remove them, qa and then push for deployment.
Mind you, this project is to be 2 weeks long. Its Friday of the first week today. And I am still working weekends.
Can I say, FML?

When managements' response is repeatedly, "we are working on it" - don't count on it anytime soon.

Snaps are great... when they work!
Now I have to figure out what's causing this BS.

BS = Binary Search (on LinkedIn)

Apparently the Schiphol (dutch airport) WiFi has a nice "feature" which makes the user think they need to accept terms, instead it's a checkbox saying "I want to do a survey for a free iPad". Talk about shitty UX...

Just disabled JS in my browser. It required adding devrant to allowlist though, but otherwise so far so good. Especially on garbage sites like wired: no more popups, no cookies, no tracking, no yOu'Ve ReaChEd yOuR dAiLy lImIt bs…

Kinda wanna say my teammates are incompetent morons but the truth is I'm not much better

So saying that about them would be admitting it about myself

Dear metaphor-diary!
Being a "WordPress-Developer" is like calling yourself a toy manufacturer while selling "individually glued" lego models.

DevOps
DevSecOps
DevManSecOps
HrDevManSecOps
HrDevManSecOpsInv

The "Gratitude" emoji pack recently introduced to Slack. They're basically "Thank you" in different languages.
Among others, there is a Russian "спасибо", but there is no Ukrainian "дякую".

What's up Slack? Didn't you paint your logo blue and yellow when the war started?

If you're gonna push your "please don't cancel us" marketing BS like all the other companies, at least be fucking consistent.

If I had some reliable metric to measure bullshit per file, let's call it BPF, I believe the number would be highest on average for files named "gulpfile.js"

I read this rant on Quora. Is this true ?

“The IT industry has devolved into a gigantic ponzi scam built on exploitation and BS. Quality of solution and quality of work was replaced with a ‘Does it work now?’ approach with zero contingency.
And the fact that geeks and nerds are naive only helps the white collar crooks to exploit them as code monkeys.”

Of course, CDN had to fall down on the day (out of 1k days of ignorance) when I finally decided to unsubscribe from Medium and other bs newsletters. I'll delegate this to the spam folder.

I have a friend who does crypto shit. Apart from that he's a great guy. But the crypto shit. I haven't had contact for over a year bc whenever I open the chat I see his last message, that I should stake my money in his etherium node or whatever bs and don't know what to write anymore :/

I’m seriously considering leaving my current team or even resigning from the organization altogether. I don’t blame anyone— I understand that managers have their own deadlines to meet and have to answer to their superiors when things go south. I have indeed developed a thick skin by getting used to all this shouting/blaming the last 3 months. But yes, I seriously don’t think there is any point in taking this anymore. It’s not good for my mental health.

My question to all of you is, is working at smaller companies better in regards to this? (I’m working at a big corporation now). And are they more unstable than bigger companies? (especially in times of COVID)

I just want to say it annoys the shit out of me that my B.Sc. Bachelor's degree in CompSci isn't enough for (ignorant) employers.

Now I have to waste time getting certs in fad languages (even though I did projects in them in college) just so I'm 'marketable' again. Man, f*** this bs.

Ridiculous requirements nowadays!

that BS thing you do when your too lazy to code and just copied a code from an existing class and renamed the vars even if it does not work or not being used just to show your boss that your working hard as f*

I specified a requirement where certain bits in a certain message shall be evaluated for certain items. The tester came up to me and talked some BS about how to guesstimate these bits by totally different bits. I said, look up the interface definition, the bits are there. Got an email, same BS. Tester was just too lazy to look it up. So I answered that message ID X has bits 60-63 for the four relevant items.
However, I carefully avoided telling him which bit was for which item so that he knew what it was, but I still forced him to look up the inter fucking face definition.

I got accepted into the University of Washington BS Computer Science & Software Engineering program today! It's been a long road since starting ITT Tech 3 years agofor a BAS in SDEV, it closing on me, starting all the way over at community college, maintaining a 4.0, and now a bootcamper at Coding Dojo. Now only at least 2 more years to go! 😁🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃😩

I really hate that smart people are the worst kind of cultists. This means that people who do some pretty cool and novel stuff fall for things like Musk-fanboyism, NFT and other crypto BS, or things like outright fascistoid ideas about "MSM"-conspiracies, race-ideology or IQ... And I hate it.

Smart people who think they have "figured it out" are the most dangerous people out there. Especially if they have any kind of rethorical skills.

The mass surveillance thingy in the Netherlands is not something I want to do with, so I'm thinking of moving my droplets to London as I heard Germany might also implement something similar. I have two DO droplets that are relatively easy to transfer but I'm open to suggestions, should I move them?

I have homework for tomorrow, so when i get home i say to myself "right, let's get this homework bs over with". What really happens is i sit down at my pc, power on my VM and keep on tweaking and improving my simple python browser. A few hours later it's already 9PM and i havn't started with my homework. So, it's now 10:30PM and I'm writing a pressentation about traveling and browsing devRant at the same time.
Not getting a lot done. I guess homework isn't my thing....

participating at an coding challenge.

the mission is to write an game solver for an game engine - in java. based on astar, pathfinding should be made possible by cloning objects.
never seen a so hardly misconcepted challenge, where character instances and their variables are static and contain uncloneable data😂 oh god what a waste of time realizing this bs

BS in Computer Science. 2y of professional experience. Does a masters degree make sense?

Some dev makes a claim that a Serialization library won't serialize a field unless it's public

I don't know the library details after but first reaction was "that has to be BS...."

Then I just do a Google search and yes I'm right.

And of course, in my head I go...why the fuck do these ppl not know how to use Google or just RTFM.....

Or use their brains.... If need for serialization required making all fields public that violates the most basic OOP principles...

This kind of BS makes me mad

" - The password must have 6 digits
- It must have at most 2 repeated digits and 3 sequentials"

RIGHT, because 293417 is SO much safer than 999123

Btw, this is a phone company, so with this password you could probably have access to someone's phone number, phone records, address, and much more. WTF

After completing urgent projects that rewrite a lot of "overtime" or even personal projects that rewrite like a few weeks to complete.

Old web dev days pre-BS... All the CSS needed to and the cross browser compat. The divs don't align... Can't get elements to center... Or it does, just not in browser X...

Then why the fuck do you waste my time and yours? Enough with the updates already!

Just like those guys' mediums when they talk about react

Just found out that I have been reassigned to maintain an in house shitty project... It's full of crap code, no documentation, has lot of duct tapes to keep the project together and 20+ open bugs and issues...

I am so happy with my current project. But my manager is always pissed off at me for no apparent reason.

Fuck this shit... Any excuse or advice to dodge this BS project? Can't quit job, I am getting payed alot here.

Corona shows that certain webshops were bought up cheaply and can't handle large loads. The fact that my shopping cart constantly crashes, the website itself crashes, flips between logged in and logged out, state is constantly corrupted and.. every so now and then I get 500 server errors, yeah, clear signs of no load balancing policy.

Everyone is raping the shopping sites right now.

I hate cheapskates.

Seriously, all these FB groups have bunch of newb members and content creator whores who spam them with these links to their "Free source code VB6 shit", "Inventory System using PHP", and all those sorts of BS.

When was the last time you went to FB to learn something?

And also, some of these folks post their works when they only glued these libraries or some kind of API thingy together made by awesome people yet they get the praise from these kidds!

We have to talk about TechLead, having ads all over YouTube that say if you follow their guide you can earn a $200k salary grad job.

devrant needs a bs emote too