Client: This works correctly, but I don’t like the code.

Me: What exactly do you not like?

Client: There are barely any lines of code. You need to add more to make it better.

I...I don’t know what to say.

You don't need to reinvent the wheel, but you have to know how it works.

Hello beautiful. Finally got fiber installed. For my girlfriend and me. Not that we really need it... But you know...

(Wifi reaches up to 170 on 5Ghz)

Got a great boss!!;

Me: Hey, do we have a corporate GitHub account?
Boss: *excitedly* do we need it? We'll get it!
Me: uhh, yeah, we need it 😉

Don't care he doesn't know what it is, got his trust to get all the right tools!

Part of my job involves speaking with users on the phone and I really don’t mind it except for THESE PEOPLE:

Me: Hi! XYZ Co. this is Tawzer!
Them: Hi Tawzer this is blah blah I need help with the website I just can’t figure it out!
Me: Okay! Let me ju-
Them: Yeah you know I’ve been struggling for hours with it I really don’t have time for this.
Me: Oh I imagine! What’s your-
Them: Well I was gonna try and get everything done today by 3 but with all of this tech stuff going wrong I just don’t know...
Me: That sounds frustrating, can i get your-
Them: Is this going to take long??
Me: Nope! I just need to know your-
Them: like I said I just really don’t have time for this!
Me: ........ What’s your-
Them: well I-
Me: WHAT’S YOUR USERNAME
Them: Uh I don’t know can you look me up? I didn’t know I’d need that.
Me: 👩🏻‍💻

When new junior front-end tells you he doesn't need to know javascript since he already knows angular.

Me: I know so many languages, I don't need to learn c++ to follow along with this 3D OpenGl tutorial!

Narrator: Oh, but he did need to know c++ to follow along with the 3D OpenGl tutorial.

Always postponed learning vim. For my new job I need to know how to work with vim.

Finally a reason not to postpone anymore!

You know you need to reevaluate your life when you see this.

When u get to know u need 300 ++ to get a stress ball

I need dating advice but everyone I know would just tell me to use ISO 8601...

You know you're tired when you try to open a div like "div()"

I need sleep.....

To everyone that writes their rants and comments as code like

Console.writeline("something something")

Stop, get some help.
You don't need to prove that you know how to print a string okay ?

They changed "Trash" to "Bin" in the Catalina update. I need to know who is the snowflake who was offended by trash??

Anyone else notice this trend:

1. Don't go to uni / drop out (who needs education).
2. Get a job in IT, it pays well (who cares you don't have a structured logic).
3. Learn need-to-know stuff only (I only need to know my code).
4. Tell others they should get into programming, it's not that hard.
5. Get asked about the workings of a computer, but that's not in your domain of work. "I only code".

Millennial much ?

Yes devRant, I know I can double tap to upvote a post, no need to show me the tip the one time I decide to click on the ++ instead!

I need to stop reading devRant posts on the train and in public in general. These rants be cracking me up too much. Most awkward when you try to explain to someone who cares to know what's so funny and you know they can't relate so you're just sitting like.....

You know you are getting closer to becoming a programmer when you start mixing jargon with normal language.

"We need to update the Nutella"

This seriously needs to stop though.

-Company We need to know how our customers use our application.
-Me: got 1000 cool ideas
-Company Oh yeah, our customers don't have internet connection...

Boss: Hey squares, I need one of you to select a new volume control, if you spot anything let me know.
Me: Say no more

"How are you going to do that?"

"I don't know..."

"I need an estimate."

"40 hours."

"Why's it going to take that long?"

"I couldn't find the right stack overflow article."

SPECIAL OFFER! LEARN EVERYTHING YOU'LL EVER NEED TO KNOW ABOUT PROGRAMMING IN TWO HOURS! ONLY $99.99! BUY NOW!

When you have one problem and you decide to use regular expressions...

You need to know this: you have two problems now.

During a random meeting for a project:

PM: We'll need you to learn Go for this project. It says you know python in your job skills, so it should be easy.
Me: Uh, hiiii. I'm in security, not development. Can't help you, I really shouldn't even be here.
PM: I think Go has security built-in, does that help?
Me: ... I don't know, you need a developer.
PM: Do you know any Go people?
Me: I think that's something you should know.
- Silence enters the room -
PM: Yes perhaps, but you don't know anyone?

Fucking wat?

Does anyone know if there's a Bob Ross of development?

I feel like I just need to hear someone coding or talking best practices in a chilled out relaxing way to help me through the day.

Yep, you need to know c++, php, HTML, CMS, and </> to become an Android developer.
Not java.
That's not important.

I love sponsored content. Always accurate.

This is utter bullshit. Repo shut down because SJW being offended. Python, then Linux, now this.

Next thing we know is GitHub got sued bc they hosted the bot. Then Microsoft. Then the internet is taken down because it serves as a vector to offend ppl.

Really. Fucker need to know when to stop.

The way most of us devs are spending time on devRant, it seems @dfox might need to introduce a feature named "Reminder" in the app to let devs know that they need to get back to code.

When you need to use PHP for EVERY project 'cause your coworkers don't know other languages... *sigh*

Yea... so you know all those rants/jokes about how you need to explain programming to ur friends and family?

I just realized I don't have that problem.... all of them are programmers as well :)

I love my thinkpad, it grew a feature where it shocks me every few minutes to let me know that i need to get shit done

Don't attempt to reach the Balmer peak at the office without first practising at home.

It will take many attempts to know how much you need to drink to achieve it. It's a fine, fine line. 🙃

i start develop using windows, but as the time goes by, i really feels the need to change to linux/mac-os.

now i know

U know u need to get laid when u type pussy instead of putty

Don't need no bootcamps, I already know how to boot.

When you know what you need, but don't know how to do it and can't get your thoughts into words well enough to ask on stackoverflow.

Any commbank developers in here wanna fix your stupid car loan application process where I need to know the VIN number of a car that isn't even built yet?

to FUCKING .zip || .tar.gz TERRORISTS

HOW THE FUCK I NEED TO KNOW THIS FUCKING ARCHIVE IS GONNA EXPLODE OR NOT?

PLEASE FUCKING ARCHIVE FILES IN SEPARATE SINGLE FOLDER, NOT FILES ITSELF SHITHEADS

It's surprising the times I actually become lazy to code:

It's not when I need to probe the problem to figure out possible solutions, but rather when I know exactly what the solution is, but will require tons of code.

Somewhere in a lonely break room
There's a guy starting to realize that eternal hell has been unleashed unto him.
It's two a.m.

It's two a.m.
The boss has gone
I'm sitting here waitin'
This desktop's slow
I am getting tired of fixin' all my coworkers' problems
Yeah there's a bug on the loose
Errors in the code
This is unreadable
Rubber ducky can't help
I cannot debug, my whole life spins into a frenzy

Help I'm slippin' into the programming zone
Git push to the prod
Set up a repo
My hard drive just crashed
All my code is gone
Where am I to go
Now that I've broke my distro
Soon you will come to know
When you need Stack Overflow
Soon you will come to know
When you need Stack Overflow

I'm falling down a spiral
Solution unkown
Disgusting legacy, ugly code
Can't get no connection
Can't get through to commit

Well the night weights heavy
On my confused mind
Where's the error on this line
When the CEO comes
He knows damn well
To keep his distance
And he says

Help I'm slippin' into the programming zone
Git push to the prod
Set up a repo
My hard drive just crashed
All my code is gone
Where am I to go
Now that I've broke my distro
Soon you will come to know
When you need Stack Overflow
Soon you will come to know
When you need Stack Overflow
When you need Stack Overflow

When you need Stack Overflow, a ha
When you need Stack Overflow
When you need Stack Overflow, a ha
When you need Stack Overflow

When you need Stack Overflow, a ha
When you need Stack Overflow
When you need Stack Overflow, a ha
When you need Stack Overflow

You know you need sleep when you scroll on DevRant and everything becomes 3D. And I’m talking, you can see depth between the text and a solid background.

Welp, I’m off to sleep.

Anyone else is doing this? When you know you need to implement it, but want to fucus on something else and #TODO just doesn't cut it. xD

I don't program because I know what I want. I program because I'm indecisive and I need rand Arrays to pick where I eat today.

HR: you didn’t write in your job experience that you know kubernetes and we need people who know it.

Me: I wrote k8s

HR: What’s that ?

…
Do you know docker ?
Do you know what docker is ?
Do you use cloud ?
Can you read and write ?
Are you able to open the door with your left hand ?
What if we cut your hands and tell you to open the doors, how would you do that ?
What are your salary expectations?
Do you have questions, I can’t answer but I can forward them. Ask question, ask question, questions are important.
What is minimal wage you will agree to work ?
You wrote you worked with xy, are you comfortable with yx ?
We have fast hiring process consisting of 10 interviews, 5 coding assessments, 3 talks and finally you will meet the team and they will decide if you fit.
Why do you want to work … here ?
Why you want to work ?
How dare you want to work ?
Just find work, we’re happy you’re looking for it.
What databases you know ?
Do you know nosql databases ?
We need someone that knows a,b,c,d….x,y,z cause we use 1,2,3 … 9,10.
We need someone more senior in this technology cause we have more junior people.
Are you comfortable with big data?
We need someone who spoke on conference cause that’s how we validate that people can speak.
I see you haven’t used xy for a while ( have 5 years experience with xy ) we need someone who is more expert in xy.
How many years of experience you have in yz ??? (you need to guess how many we want cause we look for a fortune teller )

Not much changed in job hunting, taking my time to prepare to leetcode questions about graphs to get a job in which they will tell me to move button 1px to the left.

Need to make up some stories about how I was bad person at work and my boss was angry and told me to be better so I become better and we lived happy ever after. How I argued with coworkers but now I’m not arguing cause I can explain. How bad I was before and how good I am now. Cause you need to be a better person if you want to work in our happy creepy company.

Because you know… the tree of DOOM… The DOMs day.

First, why didn't I know about this app sooner.

Second, a month into my new job as senior frontend and wonder am I good enough.

Third, I know I just need to get out of my head.

Lastly, glad to be here.

Do you ever go on YouTube to look something up then like 3 hours later find yourself watching videos on how to train giraffes or something you really don't need to know?

Work for 2 days trying to solve a Level 2 foobar problem and then realize I need to know linear algebra to solves matrices programmatically... And the results have to be in Fractions

JIT Learning. Just in time Learning. You Don't need read a book from cover to cover. YAGNI. Many technical books talk about topics that you might never need in your career. Focus on what you need to know after making a plan for what you want to achieve.

YAGNI applies to coding as well. Don't create a class or a method just because you Might need it later. Create them only when necessary. This keeps your code cleaner and there is less to test.

You know what's funny?
When every job post requires you to know atleast 20 things.. but then you find yourself stuck at a job that needs you to do 1 stupid thing. And you need to actually FIGHT to not lose all the skills and knowledge you collected till now :(

I know we might think we need drugs to accomplish something. Like coffee to get work done or alcohol to socialize better. But honestly, you are better when you are sober - because you are perfect just the way you are :)

Go to business school to get a Finance degree... Since you already know how to code, why do you need study CS? Finance is hot now, make $$$$$$

boss: i know its sunday but we really need to show something tomorrow
me:

I don't know how i should feel about this....

Honestly only reason i am on FB is bcd i need to use Messenger....

No, brain. I don't need to know Python.

Shut up, you already know Ruby, PHP, and a fuckton of front-end tech, you don't need to --

Do you remember the 3 projects that we aren't working on anymore because we have the PS4 and Assassin's Creed?

I already have a job, moron! It sounds fun, but we...

What am I doing on codecademy?

*working in android with manager who doesn't know android*

Me:"we need to establish different intents for x and y to get the job done"

Manager:"i dont need you deciding what I intend to do"

.... thats not what I meant by intent

This is what I love about fellow devs - they know what's best, you don't need to ask something like "please keep adding xyz to your post so we can see if it...". We just do it. :3

CEO: This project is of critical importance to us - anything you need at all to help make it happen swiftly, let us know and my team will be on it.

Hey, could you give us IntelliJ ultimate licences?

THAT IS A RIDICULOUS REQUEST DON'T YOU KNOW EVERY PENNY COUNTS HERE

my way of getting unstuck is going to toilet, thats why I drink soo much liquid on work, kuz then I know that when in need, I can go "TO THE THINKING ROOM"

I just want a coffee machine that is smart enough to know when I need coffee and then serves it on my desk.

(Also this coffee machine should automatically kill all annoying client's)

You know you need to take a break when you start scrolling through webpage using `j` and `k` keys

I do believe, genuinely that “I don’t know” is sometimes an acceptable answer. If you don’t know, you don’t know. I appreciate the honesty.

But at the same time

I don’t know how much longer I can take “I don’t know” as an answer from my boss when I ask about critical business things HE tasked me with, or things relating to career development and maximizing my time with this company.

Do I need my boss to have all the answers on company revenue? No.

Do I need my boss to at least have an understanding on wtf is going with projects when my priorities get changed mid-project for the 4th time? Hell yes.

how do websites have the option to deny all cookies? don't they need a cookie to know you don't want cookies?

My coworker asked where his toolbar was.
I said I removed it for him because... you all probably know why
He literally slapped me and yelled at me.
I know going onto his computer was wrong but Jesus Christ no need to fucking slap me

My desk is organized for me. I know where everything is. You don't need to understand my desk because you don't sit at it for 8 hours a day.

My internet went out the other day and I genuinely didn't know what to do with myself! Pacing around my apartment until it came back 2 hours later.
I think I need to get out more or at least get some friends but, you know... people.

My father doesn't know what I do.
He thinks that I'm just playing when I create a website or something else.
And that I need of a degree to be a developer

Guys do you know some good music for coding ???? I really need to inject hype or relaxation into the long long way of coding ?? If you know any good playlist in spotify for coding please say in comment
Thanks.

Switching to linux soon.. C is too limited on windows. I also need to find more programming friends :/ but I dont know how to make programming friends /:

Being a mentor stresses me a bit. It was nicer to work alone without the need of assigning tasks to someone else.

Quite an underwhelming rant. I know. I don't have much to rant about.

Fucking recruiters. When you say "multiple languages" and I ask for clarification, saying "multiple languages and you need to know object oriented design" again doesn't clarify things one bit

Hello everyone,
I'm new here. [OK. Let's skip this]
I want to know where to begin on my journey on learning how to create a program that predicts what a user will say next by storing already said things and by making specific characteristics for the users.

I know that I will need to train it with some data first lol.
But how will it do the prediction. I just need this part of understanding.

I'm sorry for my bad English btw.

Never know why you need to add vanilla to make vanilla. Oh wait, it's just crappy variable naming.

Me: "Here is the new feature you asked for. You can select from the dropdown and if it's "Other" you can put the details in the text field next to it"

Them: "I need to add options to the dropdown"

Me: "If you need something added to the dropdown, just let me know and we can get it added, but we need to control that field"

Them: "It won't be necessary to communicate with you to add something to the dropdown"

Me: "Yes. It will be"

you know you need to sleep if you start naming branches after anime characters

Programmers life reaching final day! [Spanish comic] [Don't need to know Spanish to understand] it only say the day of the weeks... you gotta understand

Recently covered pointers in class. I know how to use them/Have an understanding of what they do, but why would I need to use a pointer in the first place? What problem would need to be solved through the use of pointers?

The fact you know some design pattern doesn't mean that you need to force it everywhere.

seniority.

i know hes the most knowledgable.. but i have more experience.. so i dont need to ask any questions cause all of the answer is in my experience..

So to understand RFC A I need to understand Section X from RFC B which implies that you know RFC C which has been obsoleted by an obsoleted RFC.

I love it

An interface is like a pm. It defines the tasks that need to get done, but doesn't know and care about how to do them; if they're getting done they're happy.

It happened only once, when browsing all those websites and see their products online I was like:
I need to do this, I need to have a website and product online how cool would it be?

And here I am 14 years later and dream came true 🙂

Don't know if that counts for this week rant though

Yay! University break! Now I have time to learn the stuff that I want/need to learn! (Seriously, I don't know why they are pushing delphi towards us)

sudo apt-get remove -y ruby

My manager has explained in detail to me how to fix the problem I'm having. I know how to fix the problem. I just don't have permission on our servers to change the settings I need to.

Guess who does?

I belive developers need their own dating app type to get to know each other better and balance their social life...😁

Does anybody know a course on machine learning with python that doesn't need that much mathematical knowledge? Because in every course I find I need to know advanced mathematics yet I am still in grade 10 and haven't studied it yet.

Finally decided on a distro to begin with!
I have been looking at a lot of distros lately and didn't really know what I want or need in depths. So I chose KDE neon, I know it's not like a full featured distro, but I think it will be good for the start and I'll find out what I need and then will probably transist to a distro with my needs in a few months.

"Losing 80% of your screen space forces you to focus. You need to make sure that what stays on the screen is the most important set of features for your customers and your business. There simply isn’t room for any interface debris or content of questionable value. You need to know what matters most." - Luke Wroblewski

To all the developers with a permanent job:

Do you guys still reference the web when working on a project or you know everything and code everything perfectly w/o help?

Just wanted to know if I need more practice with my skills or am I good to go.

What the fuck is so hard about vim? Press i for insert mode, esc for visual mode. How is that so hard to remember? There's like 2 commands at most that you need to know

just need to say this: It's GNU/Linux folks. I know, I know, it's not as easy to say when you want to talk about it, but every once in a while give the damn GNU a little credit. Without it we might not have Linux as we know it, so show some love from time to time, it's not that hard to say GNU/Linux.

Found this on prod

Don't know who did this but wwhhhyyyy do you need to add foreach loop😅

Just add directly

JS frameworks.

it's great how most are easy to use and very useful.

i dont know why people hate this abundance of choice, if theres too many for you to chose than you need to be more decisive.

We use Unity in university to display the workings of algorithms.
Cus you know.. a little cross-platform 2d webgl is not enough.. we need this whole friggin engine with an IDE and its 1000 buttons and switches and need for an account and C#...

That moment when you simply can't find a solution to a specific dev problem and you urgently need to finish your code..... I know the feeling.

OAuth is a fucking mess beyond my understanding.

I don't know it. I don't care about it. I don't want to learn it.

I don't need to learn it.

Yay! I still don't get how I did this lol
Time to practice some more! (If you've got any good tutorials or projects let me know! I need the practice lol)

Pm: Hey we need you to add this feature to client ABC and we need it in 3 weeks.

Me: Ok. Just so I know how long have you know about this?

Pm: Oo about 3 weeks ago.

Me(outside): Ok 😐😐😐

Me(inside): Really you could give me some information about this 3 weeks ago. Even 2 weeks ago would have been find. AHHHHHHHHHHH!😡😡😡😤.

When you're panic attacks stop Midway as you realise you don't have the time to deal with that shit you know you need a break

Calling All Developers!

This is very very random, but I am taking an IT Careers class for my software Development degree. As my last assignment, I need to interview a software developer. I don't know any personally and we were told we can reach out to people online who have had lots of experience. I don't know if this is too weird, but I need an interviewee just to answer about 20 questions. I'm so stuck and don't know where to go!

I UNDERSTAND POINTERS (kind of) HAHAHAHA NOW I JUST NEED TO KNOW HOW TO USE THEM AND I WILL BE UNSTOPPABLE

you know whats wild? they're talking of AI taking of the world

and meanwhile we still need to fill out and send copies of pdfs everywhere to get things done

🤡

I just switched from Arch to Fedora...

I know I know that all the cool kids use arch, but right now I'm not up for checking out random gdm bugs or some other manual tasks. I need a stable, fairly supported and well maintained distro and fedora just works!

You know you need to stop debugging and sleep when you start rearranging your comments in the hope that your code will work!

I need to spend $2.50 in Play credit... Anyone know any app (that's not on the top charts) that would be worth buying?

If I was to have a multiple monitor setup, I would definitely need to have the same type and size of monitors. I don't know how you guys without identical monitors do it.

That time after you changed to Linux and you really need windows...
Trying to root my new server :( Don't know why can only use USB1 on my VirtualBox VM... Fuck man

" To push the boundaries, you need to know where the edges are." - Mark Boulton

Somehow it always makes me feel good when I encounter a job related to programming without any need of a degree. It's always good to know there's still a backdoor even if everything goes to hell.

I just saw this:

"I'm working with Java and I need to know why I have to change to Javascript"

Hello, I'm a teenager and I want to become a Software Developer/Software Engineer/Product Engineer, I want to know how to start, what do I need to start learning, I have some knowledge of Javascript and I don't know if should learning Python or Java and where to learn it, please if somebody can answer those questions it would be great help and I would really appreciate it.

PS: I think I may need a mentor, if someone wants to help me my Discord is: patrik11

I've been awake 40 hours now... I do need to finish this site ... I do not have much brain capacity left but I know it like the back of my hand ..

I dunno if I should sleep or 🤔 finish it ... Currently crashing sugar low no caffeine so 😐 I need to be up in two hours anyway

I'm so done with these big boring technical programming books. So painful to read... I'll just watch some quick tuts and maybe, just Google what I need to know.

fuck people who need to be hacked to care about security.

i hope everyone who used that early ap scores gets their credit cards stolen because they don't know how to use a vpn.

Any advice on some good SQL book or resources?

I need to start learning DB designing and theory.

I know jackshit apart from the basic commands.

Do I know how to use flex? Mostly.
Do I know how to center a div inside a flex? Yes.
Do I know if I need to use align-items or justify-content for it? Absolutely not.

My family thinks I really need to stay away from the screen and get a life.

I really don't know how to explain them my job. :/

I can tell everything I need to know about you by looking at where you put your curly brackets.

How do I shake the feeling that I need to know everything? As I learn more about development and its various aspects I feel like I need to master every technology and I know that's impossible but I can't help but feel it. It gets to the point sometimes where I'm paralyzed with indecision and I can't decide what to start learning

anyone else ever want to thumb up an email
the school tech manager just sent a common sense email to the kids in my school and it's surprising how much these kids need to know these kinds of things like seriously

'tech infused school' yet most kids barely know how to use MS Word
like seriously -_-

Let's make an OS. It's easy, you just need to know how to program in autorun.inf

P.S. This was an avid Mac user

So i am stuck, i have assignments to complete, i know what i need to do, but every single time i sit down to write them up, my mind goes blank and i get extremely fustrated any advice? thanks.

Client: hey, we need to do a simple animation for every main category on the page
Developer: ok... I'll need to know what kind of animation you want.
Client: (sent over a video)

A total of 1000 rendered images sent over after that...

FML

You know how shitty Crystal is when you need this setup to try and get it to work across environments. (ಥ﹏ಥ)

got first assignment on my first meet on Network Security. it require to pentest one unsecured specified website. yet they don't tell me shit about anything just try it.
i need to :
1. Footprint
2. Scanning
3. Enumeration
4. Gaining Access (previledges raising?) (bonus)

suppose : <target-website> is x
i've done this:
1. whois x
2. got the ipaddress via :
host x
3. nmap -F ip.of.x

my head is already spinning, i need to know what BASICLY each of what i've done. i only get that 'whois' get the information about that domain, 'host' is used to know the target ip address and nmap to find what are the open ports. i don't know what else should i do. need help :(

what's my next language to learn? So far I only know powershell. I don't need it for any big project, just some small games to learn the language. I'm thinking of python or c#.

Some Devs need to be better about sharing info. Like, I don't want to play 20Qs just to learn how to configure a system I never used. You have job security, don't worry! Other people are allowed to know what ya know; you don't need to impress anyone!

Does anyone know of a library I can design UI in HTML/CSS/JS for a C# app?

I need to remake my bot framework, but winforms is just so old.

Is there a good technical reason to not allow passwords to contain special characters? My isp does this and I need to know why.

You know how we mock recruiters for not knowing anything...
I wonder if they have an app where they mock developers ... Probably not they'd need one of us to build it.

Taking required compliance training on preventing bribery and money laundering...

Me: we need to manually prevent it? How well has that worked in the past.... And you know with Russia...

I was talking to some people I know that I was looking for a job. My (now) boss overheard that conversation and just told me that I don't need to look any further.

If you think some developers are a dumb.... you've never met support...

They need "training" to use systems they should already know...

I didn't know the system much either but just by looking at the screen and trying a few simple options, I figured it out...

I need a new word, and maybe job, what is dumber is than a monkey?

man just please include the using statements in your examples, because i don't know what namespaces i need to use in your dumbass examples

*laughs like a crazy mad man*

It's finnaly fucking happening!
No more need for developer mode and now I just need to wait for gamemaker studio 2 to be released on Linux (yeah it'll never happen I know)

Problem with people asking us to repair things is that sometimes we don t know how to do it.

It's always closed source or you need to be aquainted with a weird new app/social network you never used.

I want to learn Android but don't know from where and how to start . Need help 😇

!rant I need a TL:DR for custom ROMS, I already know what they are, what they do, I need to know how useful they are and where I can start!

Thanks!

New here I need to know an ide as good as visual studio

Today a functional analyst said to me : The display need to be always the same, zoom or not. I think she don’t know how a web page work.

If you don’t know how a web page work, read on the subject before starting to argue with a web dev.

"phone book of the internet"
Bitch please, we already know how the DNS works no need to remind me each time i create a domain

Feeling !@~!#@!@# when you come to know that you are not invited to meeting where architectural design is being discussed....and you will be the implementor for the sh*t stuff....

Its more p*ss*ng when you know the architect you work with doesn't know anything...and you need to impl and support it :(

What's your coding drink?

Personally: Anise or thyme tea or a large Cappucino because you know this brain need some premium fuel to work 😂

Still don't know what I'm doing, I need to learn more about the thing I'm trying to pursue.

Somehow further back on this ticket than when I started. How does that even happen?

I went from okay I can replicate the issue and trying to fix it to now the data I need to replicate it won't even load. WTF?

I don't know
Senior doesn't know
Our boss doesn't know
3 seperate QAs don't know
Boss of QA doesn't know

Client: hey, we need to build an interactive campaign page. Something that can be fun on mobile too..
Developer: o...kay... such as?
Client: how about a 360 environment and mobile can make use of the gyroscope?
Developer: should be fine but may I know what is the browser support we need to cater to?
Client: IE 9
Developer: .... ok we may need a fallback for non-supported. May I know how about the timeline?
Client: 1 month.

FML.

"We are interpreters – not merely translators between sender and receiver. What we say and how we say it makes a difference. If we want to speak to people, we need to know their language. In order to design for understanding, we need to understand design." - Erik Spiekermann

Not sure if I don't know how to manage time properly, lazy, bad or just inexperienced.

I need a "How to get shit done faster" tutorial.

@dfox This update is flawed podcasts need to be inside the app not a link to the side and I cant scroll down I don't know if it's my phone or not any1 experiencing this

"hey, you know that help site that our main app users rely on to know wtf is going on?"

"yeah...?"

"let's change the URL without pre-planning or advance warning for any relevant teams, and just tell them afterwards!"

"hell yeah, great idea!"

seems like information here is on a need to know basis, if you need to know then you definitely aren't getting it

You know you need a new pc when android studio freezes after you app crashes when trying to print out the exception but Crashlytics is faster by sending you an email.

Recently briefed a manager that we need to adjust Q2 plans to address the institutional knowledge lost during layoffs.

Yes, I know, write documentation, etc. This is reality, all our shit ain't documented.

How do I become a consultant? Do I need to master some programming languages and programming patterns and get "know-how" beyond of the general population of software engineers?

So guys at the moment Im working at a medical company as a business temp but I really like it here. At the moment they know me as the tech guy. I want to be the official systems administrator here but don't know how to go about doing that.
I have a strong Linux background but everyone here uses windows.
I think that they need a server but I don't think I can just go up to my boss and say "hey, I know I'm not certified yet but hows about you give me money so I can set up a server for you?"
I need advice.

How much do you need to know about a topic , for you to blog about it?

Hello friends 😊
I just need to get this of my chest

But at my school we currently have this project where we need to create a webapp eventually which is nice. BUT first we NEED to spend a whole semester documenting stuff! I mean some things are necessary I know that! But a whole semester ffs I'm studying to be programmer so I WANT TO CODE STUFF

Why is my school like this 😩

"Just let me know when you're done (today) with that handful of JIRA tickets that are not reproducible, have no description, and include no error information. We need to get them into the next release."

Yeah. Yeah, I'll let you know real soon.

How to know that you need a rest?

You see a code:
```
public function scopeEnabled($q)
{
$q->where('disabled', false);
}
```
And assume that you have a serious bug...

@dfox, there's still occasionally some weird stuff happening when my phone is on rotate. (Sadly I don't know how I did this.)
I'd be glad to help if you need anything from me.

You know your life is fucking with you, when you need to start your college project from square-fucking-one again, for the forth time & looking through devRant isn't improving your mood. 😐

Do I need to know every framework to be senior developer?

"Most people don't know what files are and don't know how to type and read, so they need tools that look up those files for them, put the numbers and words in those files into graphs and colors, and replace the typing with little buttons."
– imbecile on Reddit

Just had my first lesson of the course Web Development. We got an explanation of what html, css, js and php are. Nothing bad ever happened from repeating what you already know, so yeah..

But then came the horror: We need to make a website in FUCKING WORDPRESS!! I ALREADY KNOW HOW TO BUILD A FUCKING WEBSITE WITHOUT A FUCKING SHIT CMS!!

So I showed the teacher my personal website and asked if I could use and/or extend that. They loved it, but I still need to build a website using fucking wordpress!! Not even using php! No, we need to build it with the UI of wordpress.

I know that's not even hard. It's just.. WORDPRESS!!

I guess I'll just have to live with it :/

never try to know everything in a language, because you can't.
just know what you need at the moment and needful

My firm wants to use my personal blog as a platform to reach more people.

This is not something I want.

I don't know what to say, any tip to kindly answer such need?

I’d like so advice, sometimes I need to code for pretty much 2-3 days straight

I try to power nap on occasion as I know being tired can have a bit of an effect.

I need to stay alert so I was wondering what tips and tricks people may have to help

As I need to stay away from caffeine now 😒

I retract my previous questions because I’m poor/am to lazy to buy the CNC shield I need for the Raspberry Pi (100$WtF)

I need ideas or something to do as a beginner c++ programmer I don’t know much but if it is difficult I would love to hear it

When you need to know A to Z and your colleague only gives you A to C to work with, you just KNOW it is not going to be a healthy work environment.

heeeeey!

what libraries, frameworks, third-party stuff, etc. does Python have? I need to know some and I will dive deep on it!

not used to this on windows
Operation Successful...

Why do professors need .doc files? Pdf works too. I don't know how to use windows. Give me linux.

1) what do i have to know to be a good react native developer?

2) what level of javascript knowledge do need to have to understand react native?

3) how hard is typescript/ecmascript and what do i need to know to understand it? only js i guess or something else?

4) i have basic knowledge of javascript. do i have to learn it extremely well or can i start learning typescript/ecmascript along with react native?

5) tips for learning react native as fast and as efficiently as humanly possible

thanks

When you have no developer friends and you need a question answered, but you don't know how to write the question on SO!

Hi. I'm not really a developer but I soon hope to be. But the first thing I need to know is programming, which I know next to nothing about. I've tried my hand at simple Python but with so many articles and YouTube videos saying all sorts of languages are "The best to learn" or "A must know code language", I really don't know what to do. Hopefully someone here can help me the figure out which language is the best for a beginner programmer.

When the client doesn't know what to build and you know exactly what they need 🙌

You know that when the admins need almost a day to open the gates for the whale to swim to the sea?

How do you know, without a doubt, that you really need to take the time to sort through your storage devices?

...ok, I got the message, loud and clear.

I feel like whenever they are pretending you need to know all the patterns by memory, testing you on that, it's a nonsense and it even makes me stop wanting to enter the place.

Im not supposed to know them instantly, i use tools like the internet. Test my ability to solve problems, comnunicate, work in groups, but, specific stuff by memory? Why?

Why the fuck is it so hard to write a simple bash script. Syntax so strange and so many symbols you need to know. If you need to do calculations with floating point numbers, the mess is perfect.

I've moved to Linux I'm gonna give it a week. See if it's any good I know if I need windows as a virtual machine it's there 95% speed ain't bad

I'm taking data structures and algorithm analysis class at college but don't know how to study... I need advice, by the way the language we're using is c++

I need to run a cloud Linux vm. My need is limited to running tomcat and about 10 web services- that's it. What I would like is an easy to use Linux flavor with a nice UI.

I need to know what cloud service and what flavor of Linux. And please don't get snotty with me because I have run massive applications on Solaris, AIX and HPUX - I am over doing things in a shell.

Don't do meetings?

When I have a 7+ meeting and I'm not presenting, I always have a prod problem.

My politics for meetings copy the need to know politic inside Intelligence service. Not 100% sure I need to be there? I won't be there.

I need to know, supposing where you work has an empty remote position, will your company hire devs from Iran?

I really don't balance social and dev life. I know I need some time to socialize but I just can't. It's like my life right now is in front of a computer and lines of code... Not that I don't like it, but I know I need to do other stuff besides coding, but I really don't know what to do and how to manage time. If anyone can give some advice, it would be great.

You know what's terrifying? When you hear a contracts person say "we already know what we're going to bid, so we don't need engineering inputs."

Being on second line support, I don't feel I need to say much else as I'm sure many of you know my pain right noe

You know you need to upgrade when the Test Suite crashes your laptop *facepalm*

Found myself explaning the internet today and immediatly gave up - because she does not need to know, that's what she has me for!

Can't wait until next Wednesday night for my careers meeting, the careers teacher that's interviewing me really hates bad language and I've already decided when she asks what skills I have I'm going to tell her I know Brainfuck (which is only half true but she doesn't need to know that😉)

Php.....mmmmmm.....why do I need a whole server to run a programming language?? 😐

And I know you can run php in the terminal, I know it has an interactive mode. 🙄

Anarchists don't need project managers to know what to do.

How to stay 1 step ahead instead of always try (and fail) to just catch up?

I feel like the amount of tools/FWs/languages/DBs that a web dev is expected to know now adays is not realistic, and overwhelming. not only you need to constantly learn about new things that are currently the *hottest hype word*, you also need to keep track of updates to the tools you already "know", so the more you try to know the more there is to keep track of, and also how can you remember everything you learned if in a typical workplace you usually use the same 1/2 languages?

Never have i ever felt like i know enough to be confident in my abilities when around other programmers

I don't try to learn new staff but to understand it. The day I need it, it would be easier to learn at that moment than learn everything I find. You can't know everything and that's ok. The important is to know what you need.